Read Confessions of a Heartbreaker Online
Authors: Jennifer Sucevic
To her face anyway.
She raises one, thinly-waxed-into-submission eyebrow. My gaze then slides to her sidekick and back on-again boyfriend, Max. His have-never-been-waxed-and-will-never-be-waxed-in-this-lifetime bushy eyebrows shoot up as well. He looks genuinely interested in what could have possessed me to drive all the way over to this large, red brick building that just so happens to house these strange rectangular objects with writing inside them.
And yeah, I totally get where they're coming from on that one so I can't exactly act all offended to be called out on it. Of course that doesn't mean I'm about to hand over my actual reason for being here either. That info is staying strictly locked up in the vault.
Ignoring her question, I ask one of my own. "So, I see you two crazy kids have finally worked things out."
Honestly, it was only a matter of time before Max got sucked back into Emily's drama filled rendition of a life. The guy needs a twelve step program to kick the Emily habit. Because trust me, that shit will kill you faster than smack.
And, as much as I'd like to, I can't exactly blame him for going back to her. Max, like most typical seventeen year old guys, just so happens to enjoy getting laid on a fairly regular basis which is why, historically, their break ups never last very long. I have to actually give him props for holding out as long as he did this time. I think it might be a record.
In answer, Ms. Ain't-All-There-In-The-Head wraps her body around Max like she's doing some strange impersonation of a boa constrictor. If this chick suddenly starts unhinging her jaw, I'm out of here.
As if that disturbing display of public affection wasn't quite enough to repel me, she starts tonguing him. Literally. She's
literally
licking the side of his face before suddenly latching onto his mouth. It's like a terrible traffic accident you just can't look away from. No matter how much you may want to. I wince a little, watching in horrified fascination. Man, she is really going to town over there.
You know, it wouldn't surprise me in the least if she went all praying mantis on him one day and ate his head. FYI- praying mantises do that to their mates after they’ve done the nasty. I could totally see Captain Crazy offing Max’s head in just such a fashion.
Jeez, it was just a simple question, people.
I don't need to witness some R rated reenactment of what they do alone together. Or not alone together as is currently being demonstrated. In the parking lot. No one should be subjected to the public mauling that's currently taking place in front of me. It's just not right. My wolfed down dinner suddenly starts churning in my gut. I think it might be looking for a way out. There's really only so much of this I can handle without spewing my burger and fries everywhere.
So I clear my throat.
Loudly.
Twice.
Make that three times.
Okay, I'm just leaving before they actually start going at it like a couple of feral cats in heat.
I feel like my retinas have been permanently scarred by this little impromptu demonstration of how happy Lunatic Fringe is to be reunited with the love of her psychotic life.
Ugh.
"Wait," gasping, she finally comes up for air before prying herself away from Max's face, "wait!"
I'm happy to report that Max's head still looks intact. I'm just barely able to keep from rolling my eyes as I answer with a bored, "Yeah?"
"You never said what you were doing here at the library." Her red lipstick is totally smeared. All over Max's dazed looking face. He looks like a toddler who just finished eating a tube of his mother's lipstick. Just in case you're wondering, it's not a good look for him.
I should have left when I had the chance.
They both seem to be waiting for an answer. Hmmm. What would be a plausible explanation as to why I'm at the library? Think, think, think. Why would Parker Montgomery be at the library... Man, that's a tough one. The Jeopardy theme music starts playing in my head.
Okay- so here's what I figure my options are:
A) I wanted to check out a book.
Nope, they'd never buy it. I don't even think I could say it with a straight face anyway.
B) I was lost and needed directions.
No... Not believable enough. Everyone has GPS on their phone.
Hmmm, what could I possibly say to get this head case off my back?
Alex Trebek is patiently waiting for an answer and it suddenly appears that I'm out of time.
"I'm, uh, you know, getting a little busy with one of the librarian chicks here," I finally improvise.
They both nod as if this makes perfect sense. Apparently that was a completely believable explanation as to why I'd be at the library. I can't help but frown at the pair of them. Maybe I really am the man whore Jordan accused me of being. At this point, anything's possible.
"A little hot librarian action." Max raises a clenched fist for me to bump.
"Nice!"
I think I'm pretty much done with this conversation. "Well, I've got to take off." Because I have better things to do- like track down Jordan and figure out why she ditched me and then, very possibly, kick Hartley's ass. Clearly I have a full, action packed night ahead of me and I'm itching to get to it.
Crazy gives me a big, toothy grin which kind of reminds me of a hungry piranha before they disappear inside the library.
Sliding into my truck, I quickly type in Jordan's name and wait for her address to pop up on my phone. And then I'm on my way. No chick blows off Parker Montgomery and lives to tell the tale. Actually... I'll accept any explanation that has absolutely nothing to do with Hartley.
It takes me about ten minutes to find her house and then an additional three minutes of simply staring at it before deciding that I'm actually going to go through with this.
Because what I'm staring at couldn't possibly be classified as a
house
.
Nope, this monstrosity is more like a huge Mc Mansion. Jeez.
But Mc Mansion or not, I'm getting to the bottom of why Jordan flaked on me today. So I ring the bell and wait. Loud chimes echo throughout the house.
I can't help but shift uncomfortably from one foot to another. I'm just about to push the bell again when the massive door swings open. And low and behold- there she is. Something within me tightens while simultaneously loosening. I don't exactly know how that's possible but apparently it is.
Well, at least we can cross car accident off of the list of possible explanations because she looks perfectly fine. And, I quickly assess, Hartley is nowhere in sight. Which is good news for that jackass. The guy won't be getting a beat down from me tonight. Of course, tomorrow is another story.
I seriously can't believe how happy I am to see this chick. It's a little disturbing actually. And if she wasn't standing right in front of me looking so damn delicious, like a big bowl of chocolate ice cream with hot fudge and whipped cream and sprinkles that I'm all but dying to take a massive bite of, I might examine those feelings a bit more closely. In all honesty, these feelings, which seem to be growing by leaps and bounds on a daily basis, should be scaring the crap out of me. Warning bells are going off in my head as we speak, demanding that I run away and never look back again, but I don't care.
Jordan's eyes widen at the sight of me before she throws a quick glance behind her. For some strange reason she doesn't look nearly as thrilled to see me as I am to see her.
"Parker. What are you doing here?"
That seems to be the question of the day, now doesn’t it.
I make a big show of looking down at my cell phone before meeting her eyes again. "Well,
Jordan
, I was at the library waiting for my tutor but she never showed. Totally rude, huh?"
She winces before throwing yet another glance over her shoulder. Frowning, I wonder what's so damn interesting that she has to keep looking down the long hallway towards the back of the house. Maybe Hartley is here after all.
Grrrr.
She says quietly as her eyes skitter away from me, "I'm really sorry." Hmmm, this isn't typical Jordan behavior. At all. "I guess I lost track of time."
Since she hasn't exactly invited me in, I lean against the door all leisure-like. I am so not leaving until I have all the answers I've come for. This nervous, twitchy behavior isn't the Jordan I've come to know over the past couple of weeks.
"Can we, ah, make it up tomorrow night?"
I'm not about to let her off the hook until I figure out what's going on. Little does she know that I can totally get my Scooby Doo on when there's a mystery that needs to be solved. And Jordan is a total mystery to me. She always has been. I'm having the damnedest time trying to wrap my mind around this girl. You'd think she would throw me a bone for all my effort. But not Jordan. Nope, she's a total hard ass.
And we all know how much
that
gets me going...
I look around the room I'm almost standing in. It's ridiculously huge. And I don't know a whole lot about decorating, but I can tell that everything looks pretty fancy. Which is just another word for expensive. And that honestly surprises me because I totally did not get the rich bitch vibe from her at all. Usually I’m spot on with these things. Okay... maybe not the whole lesbo thing... but pretty much everything else.
"So why don't we work on it right now?"
For almost a full minute she chews on her bottom lip as she contemplates the question. I have to admit that it's a really sexy look on her. Yep, things are definitely starting to stir in my jeans which could end up being fairly embarrassing if she happens to notice. "I, ah, can't go to the library at the moment."
So here I go stating the obvious. "Well, what about if we just work here?"
"Here?"
She looks surprised and slightly taken aback that I would even suggest such a thing. In fact, if memory serves me correctly and I believe it does, I've gotten far less of a reaction when I've jokingly asked her to get naked with me. Actually, I wasn't joking about that. I was totally serious.
I'm just about to give her a smart ass comment, when I hear,
"Jordan?"
I watch as she squeezes her eyes tightly shut before opening them again. Her wide green eyes arrow straight to mine. She looks...
scared? Anxious? Sick?
The voice drifts again from somewhere deep inside the house. It seems higher pitched this time.
"Jordan?"
I'm actually finding it difficult to rip my eyes away from Jordan's because the look filling her eyes is so damn strange. And it's doing weird prickly things to my gut. Things that make me want to pull her close and protect her from whatever’s going on inside this house.
Without any warning, she tries to close the door on me but since I'm still leaning against it, it's not going anywhere. And neither am I. "Okay, time to leave, Parker. I gotta go."
"Why? What's going on?" Because for the life of me, I can't figure it out. "Who is that?"
We both hear the strange crying that now fills the charged air and I can't stop my eyes from bouncing around behind her. What the hell is going on in there?
Again she tries shutting the door on me and I can tell she's using all her might but still the door doesn't budge. "Parker! This isn't a joke, I have to-" her words trail off abruptly as the sound of glass shattering echoes throughout the first floor. "Damn it!" She spins around before taking off down the hallway. "Just leave, Parker! Okay?" Her voice sounds thick, strained, as if it's filled to the brim with tears.
Yeah, that's not about to happen.
Jordan should know better than to expect me to follow any kind of directive. So I do the only thing I can and take off, following her through the hallway which opens up to a large kitchen. But I'm not noticing just how impressive the room happens to be with all its marble countertops and gleaming hardwood floors. I jerk to a quick halt just as my eyes flare wide because there's broken glass everywhere. Tiny glittering shards look as if they have rained down all over the dark wood floor.
And in the middle of all the debris lays a tiny woman with pale blond hair. If I didn't know any better, I'd think I was staring down at Jordan. Only this is an older looking version of her.
Jordan kneels down carefully besides the woman. She hesitates for a long moment looking as if she wants to sweep some of the broken pieces of glass away with her shaking hands. Thankfully she doesn't. My heart suddenly slams painfully against the wall of my chest. Looking up, she finally meets my eyes. There's that haunted look again. The one I've caught fleeting glimpses of before.
"Parker, please... please just go." She chokes back a rising sob. “I really can’t handle you being here right now.”
Something stills within me as she whispers the words. And that's when it hits me that I'm in deep shit here because there's not a damn thing I wouldn't do for this girl.
But I also know that I can't give her what she's asking for either.
Because there's no way in hell I'm leaving.