Colorado 01 The Gamble (23 page)

“Yes,” I snapped quietly so Mindy wouldn’t
hear, “I was there.”

“Yeah, so, fixin’ her up with the first guy
that strolls in maybe ain’t such a good idea.”

“The first guy who strolls in who has a
badge, carries a gun and looks at her like he wants to build a
fortress around her so no one can ever hurt her again.”

Max’s head jerked and he asked, “What?”

“In other words, Max, he’s sweet on
her.”

“Gotta be blind not to see that, Nina, and,
by the way, it’s the whole damn reason Mick brought him up here in
the first place, seein’ as he coulda done his business alone or he
coulda just called me and they both knew Mindy was here. But it
still ain’t a good idea.”

“You’re wrong,” I snapped softly.

“No, I’m not.”

I was so angry and Max was being so
annoying, I didn’t pause to consider my next words. I just said
them and in saying them inadvertently I shared.

“
Trust me, I know, you get messed up by a
man, it’s important to learn right away that there are good ones
out there or you might find yourself so far down a
very
lonely road that you’ll never
be able to find your way back.” His face changed, he hadn’t been
exactly angry, just wanting to make his point, but now his eyes
were hyper-alert and intense but I also had a point to make, I felt
it was important, so I kept talking. “I’m not saying he’s going to
heal her wounds, watch her walk down the aisle to him in a month
and they’re going to grow old together. I’m just saying he seems
like a nice guy, there aren’t many of those around and she needs
all the reminders she can get that even a rare breed can be
found.”

“You get messed up by a man?” he asked and I
grew confused at his question for I found this a change of subject
and I was intent on the last one.

“What?”

“You get messed up by a man?” he repeated
and my mistake dawned.

“I’m a woman,” I covered quickly. “That
happens.”

“How’d you get messed up?” he was Max
therefore he didn’t let it go.

“Usual stuff, now get off me, I should go
help Mindy.”

“How’d you get messed up?”

“Max, get off.”

“Nina, answer me.”

I went silent, stared at him and I
considered my approach to this current dilemma. Then I decided,
what the heck? I’d tried everything else, why not just lay it on
him?

Still, I tested the waters before diving in.
“You’re not going to get up unless I answer, are you?”

“Nope,” he responded immediately.

I nodded and said, “All right then, Max, you
name it, it happened.”

“What?”

I brought my hands up between us and
counted them down. “My first boyfriend cheated on me with my arch
nemesis, the homecoming queen no less, which was humiliating. My
second boyfriend was just a jerk. Third and fourth, both cheated,
the fourth with
my best friend
.
The fifth stole from me, not much but not much is enough when it’s
stealing. The sixth got drunk a lot and got mean when he did it and
he didn’t care who he was mean around and, since a lot of the time
he was around me, I got the bulk of it. The seventh beat me. The
eighth asked me to marry him and two days from me telling him it’s
over, he hasn’t called. I haven’t been raped, thank God, but that’s
enough for a girl, don’t you think?”

“The seventh beat you?” Max asked
quietly.

“Twice.”

“
Beat you?
”

My body tensed under his, which I realized
belatedly was solid as a rock, as the tone of his words penetrated
and, again, my mistake dawned.

I mentally made note that the sharing
strategy might not be the right one either.

“Twice,” I whispered in the face of what
appeared to be his building fury.

“What happened?” he demanded, his voice
getting loud.

“Max,” I was still whispering.

“What, the fuck, happened?” Max was getting
louder.

“Mom told Charlie, Charlie flew to The
States and paid him a visit and I took a prolonged vacation in
England while Mom moved my stuff out,” I answered quietly.

“Fucking hell,” Max murmured.

“Max –”

“
Fucking hell!
” Max shouted and then I stared in
terrified horror as his torso twisted away from me, he reared an
arm back and slammed his fist into the bed at my side.

“Max,” I breathed through frozen lungs, his
hand instantly moved to cup my cheek and his face was hard but his
voice was suddenly soft.

“Never hurt you, baby,” he whispered and
tears hit my eyes.

“Don’t –”

“Never.”

“Is everything all right?” Mindy asked and
my head twisted on the bed as Max looked up and we saw Mindy
standing at the top of the stairs.

“Give us a minute, darlin’,” Max said to
her.

“Is everything all right?” Mindy
repeated.

“We’re fine, sweetheart,” I said softly.
“Down in a minute.”

“Max?” she called, her eyes on him, her face
pale.

“We’ll be down in a minute.”

She studied us a second, whispered, “Okay,”
then turned and ran down the stairs.

“So that’s the reason for the shield,” Max
said, my head twisted back and my eyes hit his.

“Max –”

His gaze unfocused and he muttered, “Fucking
hell.”

“I made those choices, Max, I wasn’t exactly
blameless,” I told him and his eyes refocused so much my breath
caught at their intensity.

“Don’t you dare,” he ordered.

“Sorry?”

“Don’t you fuckin’ dare take on that blame.
Cheats, thieves, abusers, it’s their problem. You take on that
blame you got no choice but to build a shield.”

“Max –”

“This guy now, the one you’re shakin’ off,
he drink?”

“No.”

“Say shit to you?”

“Max –”

“Does he?”

“No!”

“Lift his hand to you, without your brother
around to have your back?”

“Of course not.”

“Just doesn’t fuckin’ care.”

I couldn’t deny that.

“Max, please, get off.”

“Lonely path,” he said and I didn’t reply
but he wasn’t looking for one, he kept talking. “You hate it.”

“I –”

“Searchin’.”

“Max, please –”

His hand at my face slid into my hair and
his face got close before he said, “I know this, those assholes are
assholes because they did what they did and because they did it to
a good woman. Learned some things in my life, Duchess, one of the
most important, you find a good woman, you take care of her.”

“Please.”

“This happens between us, Duchess, I’d take
care of you.”

“Don’t.”

“Die doin’ it,” he vowed.

My breath stuck in my throat as his words
wrapped tight around my heart and I made a noise, half gasp, half
moan.

“That’s what I’ve learned,” he finished.

“Please stop talking.”

“You don’t believe me?” he asked.

“Can we stop talking now?”

“You’re so far down that path, you think you
can’t find your way back.”

“Max –”

“Baby, wake up and look around, that path
brought you straight to my fuckin’ house.”

I could take no more. I closed my eyes and
turned my head away. If I couldn’t escape him physically, I had to
escape him mentally.

His thumb slid along my cheekbone under my
bruise and his next words penetrated my mental evasion.

“Shoulda fucked him up worse.”

I gulped back tears and pressed my cheek
into the bed.

“I knew a man laid his hands on you, I would
have.”

I shook my head but kept it averted. Max
fell quiet but his thumb slid back over my cheekbone then his
fingers trailed through my hair then down my neck.

“See you’ve had enough,” he whispered and I
nodded.

His weight left me but he wasn’t gone but a
second when I was on my feet in front of him.

I opened my eyes and tilted my head back to
look at him as both his hands settled at my neck.

“I gotta go into town,” he said. “It’ll give
you time.”

I nodded again.

“I wanna know what’s happenin’ with Damon
before Mindy gets near town. I need to leave her with you.”

“We’ll be all right,” I assured him and his
forehead dropped to mine.

“Nina, I get Mindy sorted out, tonight, I
want you to talk to me.”

“Max –”

“Think about it, honey.”

I bit my lip then said, “Okay.”

“All right.” His thumb swept my jaw then his
hands brought me closer and his lips went to my forehead. “Be back
as soon as I can,” he muttered there, kissed me sweet then let me
go and walked away without looking back.

The minute I lost sight of Max, I ran to the
bathroom, closed the door, put my back to it and lifted my hands in
front of me. They were shaking.

I closed my eyes and tried to blank my
mind.

I like him,
Charlie said to me.

“Be quiet,” I whispered.

Nina?
Charlie called.

“I said, be quiet.”

Sweetheart, see that
light?
he
asked.

“Please,” I begged.

Neenee Bean, it isn’t a
train,
Charlie told
me.

“Shut up.”

You’re almost there,
he finished.

I closed my eyes, slid down the door, pulled
my legs to my chest and wrapped my arms around them, putting my
cheek to knee.

A knock came at the door and I jumped.

“Nina?” Mindy called.

“Be right out!” I called back.

“You okay?”

“Great, just going to take a shower.”

There was a hesitation then, “All
right.”

I waited for Mindy to come back, say
something more, knock again, for Charlie to invade my mind.

When nothing happened, I took a shower.

* * * * *

Feeling the need to be prepared for what
came next, I not only took a shower, I did my hair and makeup too.
Then I dressed in jeans and a thin, violet, boat neck sweater that
had a wide dip at the top of the back and a tie across my shoulders
holding the sides together.

Dressed and ready to face my next ordeal, I
wound my way down Max’s stairs and saw Mindy sitting at his
computer. All buoyant, skip-dancing Mindy gone, what happened the
night before had worn her innate cheerfulness clean away.

Last night she’d cried all the way to Max’s
house then she’d pulled herself together when we walked in then she
starting crying again when Max got me some ice for my eye.

“Go upstairs, honey,” Max had whispered
while he held the ice to my eye. “Get ready for bed, lie down, keep
the ice on as much as you can. I’ve got Mindy and I’ll be up
soon.”

Considering the situation, I hadn’t argued
about him “having Mindy” or, more importantly, meeting me in bed.
Firstly, since Mindy was sleeping on the couch, there was nowhere
else for either Max or I to bed down. Secondly, I knew Mindy needed
Max just then and me arguing about sleeping arrangements would
delay her getting him. Therefore, I did as I was told, lying in bed
and listening to their murmuring until I fell asleep.

Now I knew, even with all that crying last
night, watching her despondently clicking on Max’s computer, she
was having a very prolonged “bad moment” and I had to do what I
could to make it go away.

She tipped her head back to give me a small
smile but that too looked dead. Then she turned back to the
computer screen.

I walked up to her, hesitated because it
seemed we’d known each other an age with all that had gone on but
we didn’t know each other all that well then I went for it and
gently pulled her hair over her shoulder.

“I have to check my e-mail, darling, then
make a couple of calls. If you want to get a shower, after I’m
done, I’ll give you a facial,” I offered, drawing her long, curly,
soft hair through my palm again and down her back.

She twisted her neck to look at me. “A
facial?”

“Yes, I do an at home facial every weekend.
Brought all my stuff with me. It’s fantastic. Your skin will never
feel so good.” I put my hand to her cheek and said, “Promise.”

“Are you okay?” she whispered, her voice
trembling with emotion or fear or both.

“
I’m fine,” I lied because I… was…
not
.

“Max sounded –”

“He’s fine.”

She shook her head and my hand dropped
away.

“
He sounded
pissed,
” she told me and she was right, except it was a
significant understatement. “Never heard him like that, seen his
face like that. Even when he was fighting Damon last night he was
in control.”

I pressed my lips together, uncertain how to
proceed. Then I decided on honesty.

“You know what happened to you a few weeks
ago?”

Her eyes got wide then her mouth got tight
then she swallowed before she nodded.

“One day, sweetheart, you’re going to have
to tell a good man what happened to you and, on your behalf, he’s
going to get like Max did earlier.”

I watched her shiver, actually
watched
her
shiver
, before she whispered, “You’ve been raped
too?”

I shook my head quickly and said,
“Beaten.”

“Oh Nina.” She was still whispering but now
tears were in her eyes and I bent at the waist, got close and put
my hand back to her face.

“
We girls, we’re tough, darling. Soft on
the outside but, deep down, we’re
tough
. Doesn’t feel like it now but none of this is going to
beat you.”

She was trembling, also visibly, but she
said, “Okay.”

“I promise.”

“Okay.”

“Go get a shower, sweetheart, use my stuff.”
When she hesitated, I continued, “Showers work miracles.” I ran my
knuckles along her cheek and smiled before I finished, “And facials
are even better.”