Cherished (22 page)

“Okay, ladies, we've got your yummy entrées.”

Cyd stared at hers when the server set it down. She always got the same thing—baked ziti with sausage—and it looked delicious. But she thought she'd be sick.

“Enjoy, ladies!” Their server left them in their silence.

“Shall we pray?” Phyllis asked. When no one replied, she began, “Heavenly Father, we thank You for this food and pray it nourishes our bodies. And we thank You for Daughters' Fellowship. You've been so faithful to us, and we're looking to Your faithfulness again. Protect us, Lord, from the enemy's attempts to divide. Bring peace where he seeks to bring strife. May Your joy be our strength. In Jesus' name.”

“Amen,” Cyd whispered.

Forks clanged as the women tried to busy themselves with their meal—every woman but one.

Cyd could feel Dana's eyes on her.

“Wow,” Dana said. “No one answered, which means Heather really did hear the song.” She shook her head. “So, Daughters' Fellowship prayed for God to open doors for Kelli's music, and when He opens the door,
she
gets to hear it before we do. I find that interesting.”

Cyd looked to the other end of the booth. “Dana, you don't know the whole story. Trust me.” She wished she could explain the bond between Kelli and Heather, but that wasn't for her to reveal.

“I guess I don't. But let's see what I do know. You met with the girl on Saturday, took her to dinner afterward”—she ticked the events off on her fingers—“and hung out with her at your house on Sunday. Maybe I should just leave, and y'all can start a new Daughters' group with Heather.” A tear fell from her eye. Dana dug in her purse and tossed a twenty-dollar bill on the table.

“You're not really leaving, are you?” Cyd asked.

Dana got up and walked away.

“Excuse me, Phyl.”

Phyllis slid out of the booth so Cyd could get out. She caught up to Dana by the bar. “We need to talk outside.”

They left the restaurant and walked down the sidewalk, away from the people dining outdoors, Cyd praying every step.

Lord, I don't even know what to say. Please help me
.

When they had some privacy, Cyd stopped and turned. “Dana,” she said, “please don't blow this out of proportion. You're making way too much of this.”

“Really? She nearly took my husband from me, and now she's getting between me and my best friend.”

“Dana, that's nonsense . . . I'll always be your best friend. You've been stuck with me for nearly thirty years and you've got at least another thirty to go. I understand you're hurt, but—”

“No, you don't understand, Cyd.” Dana ran her fingers through her hair in frustration. “From the moment her name came up, it was like the scab was ripped off and I started bleeding again. The images of her and Scott are even starting to come back. I need her to move to another universe. I don't want to see her. I don't want to hear about her.” She gave a flippant laugh. “But instead, she's hanging out at your house!”

“It's not like that, Dana.”

“Actually, it is. The reality is that Heather's world and my world have bumped up against one another—
again
—and my sanity can't take it.”

Cyd waited a few beats. “I know I mentioned this before, but . . . have you ever considered . . . forgiving Heather?”

“Can't say I have, no. Why? Thinking about a Kumbaya party at your house for her and me?”

“It's not about you and her,” Cyd said. “It's about
you
. Forgiveness would go a long way toward your own peace.”

“I
had
peace, Cyd, when she was out of the picture.”

“I'm not talking about that kind of peace. I'm talking about a real inner peace.”

“Well, pray for me, because I'm not feeling it right now.” She turned to leave. “I just need some time. And space.”

C
YD ENTERED HER BEDROOM AND COLLAPSED FLAT ON
the bed.

“How'd it go, babe?” Cedric lay next to her, watching ESPN highlights.

“Terrible.”

He lifted his head and looked at her. “What happened?”

“Dana and Scott rode past here on Sunday to give you something and saw Heather's car parked out front. In her mind, Heather's become part of the family.”

“Ah, makes sense now.” Cedric clicked off the TV and turned on his side toward her. “Scott called today about getting me a draft of the promotional materials. We talked about the choices theme, and he said we need to make sure guys understand that bad choices can reap bad consequences for a long time. When you think it's over, it comes roaring back at you. I bet he's dealing with a lot at home right now.”

“All because of me. I hate this. I wish I hadn't gone to that songwriters' conference, then I wouldn't be in the middle of this.”

“Maybe. No point in second-guessing. I thought you said your time with Heather and Kelli was incredible.”

“That's just it. When I focus on Heather, my heart is so sure that I'm supposed to be in her life. But when I focus on Dana, my heart breaks, knowing how it makes her feel.”

“Babe.” He caressed her face. “Keep focusing on God. You felt He was leading you to do this, so you've got to trust He'll work it out. Right?”

“I know.” She stared off to the side. “But things are only going to get worse.” She couldn't hold back tears. “Why now?”

Cedric took her into his arms. “Did you get a chance to tell them?”

“No. Dana left before we'd even eaten. I didn't feel like sharing the news without her.” She sniffed into his chest. “Such a huge moment in my life. I'm going to have a baby, and Dana doesn't know about it?”

“Sweetheart, we only found out yesterday.”

“Still.”

He rubbed her back. “I still can't believe it.”

“Me either.” Thoughts of the baby lifted her mood. She looked up at him and kissed him. “You and I, having a baby. It's the most exhilarating feeling.”

“Uh,” he said. “Secondmost for me.”

She frowned at him. “What's the first?”

“Marrying you. I'm still amazed that God actually gave me you as a wife.”

“You're making me cry again. And I'm not even a big crier.” She sat up suddenly. “I wonder if it's a hormone thing. Oh, joy. I'll be a big fat crybaby now.” She sank down again.

“Least you'll be a beautiful big fat crybaby.”

She cut her eyes up at him, then snuggled close. “Feeling's mutual, by the way. I'm still amazed God gave me you.
And
I'm amazed you're still giving me roses.” She gazed beyond him to the nightstand, at the dozen fresh golden roses he'd brought home after work.

“You didn't think it would stop, did you?”

Cedric had given her roses from the first weekend they met through to their wedding day—each time a different color with a special meaning. She thought a moment. “I guess I just didn't expect it.”

“Good. I like surprising you. But I'm running out of colors. Might have to recycle some old ones.”

Cyd smiled. “You'll come up with something, and it'll be perfect. I never even knew there was such a thing as gold roses, let alone that they symbolized a joyous occasion.”

“I had to mark this occasion somehow. The two of us becoming first-time parents in our forties? It's wild and wonderful and—”

“Scary.”

Cedric sat up on an elbow. “What do you mean?”

“All the stories you hear about high-risk pregnancies. What if there are complications with my health? Or the baby's?”

“Sweetheart, it's not like you to worry.”

“But what if something goes wrong with the pregnancy? I'm almost forty-one. I might not get another chance. What if—”

He planted a kiss. “What if we just trust God—with the baby and the pregnancy, with Dana, with everything?”

Sounded like advice she'd given someone else. But with life pressing in as it was, in ways she'd never before experienced, the dial seemed stuck on worry. “So you're saying it's not a good thing to drive myself crazy imagining the worst?”

“Not for you or the baby.”

She sighed. “Guess there's nothing I can do to control any of it anyway.”

He smiled at her. “There's one part you can control.”

She tossed her eyes. “I know. I can trust.” She ran her hand slowly across her belly. If only it were as easy as flipping that dial.

nineteen

T
HURSDAY DAWNED WITH A PROMISING OPPORTUNITY—
and Kelli just knew it was God at work. Earlier in the week, she had hit the pavement and dropped off cover letters and résumés at local firms with communications or marketing personnel. At one place she'd done a little more, after reading a feature in the morning paper about Tina Schoenfeld. She was being honored as one of St. Louis's Most Influential Businesswomen—and she was president of a public relations agency. Kelli included a special letter with a congratulatory note for her.

She couldn't believe it when she got a call first thing this morning from Schoenfeld's assistant, who asked whether Kelli was related to Cedric London. Turned out, Cedric had worked with Tina in the past, was even instrumental in helping her secure a prior post. The assistant wanted to know if Kelli had time today to grab a quick lunch.

Kelli agreed in a heartbeat. Not only did she hope to glean wisdom from this successful businesswoman, but even more, she hoped this would be an entrée to the start of her career. If Cedric had helped Tina, surely Tina would help Cedric's sister. Wasn't that how it worked?

But the lunch appointment at the quaint corner café in Clayton ended with expectations dashed. Tina did want to return the favor, but it didn't reach farther than the lunch itself and a sprinkling of encouragement and advice. As for an actual job, Kelli should call her in three to five years, once she'd gotten great experience elsewhere.

Kelli mulled the disappointment as she walked to her metered parking spot and got in her car. But it didn't take long for her thoughts to change course. She was headed to Brian's for their first “official” collaborating session. She couldn't deny the anticipation she'd felt the last few days. There was nothing sweeter than the sound of melodies in her head again—they were still coming. That she might be able to do something tangible with them was almost too much to grasp. But it was also hard to grasp the thought of working with Brian.

Her phone rang as she started the car. She wondered if it was Brian . . . or Miles. Strange having them coupled in the same thought.

She pulled out her cell and smiled. “Hi, Miles.”

“How did it go?”

“Lunch was good, but she's not looking to hire me.”

“That's too bad. I thought for sure it would lead to something.”

“Yeah.” She shifted into drive.

“What's your next step? Sending off more résumés this afternoon?”

She pulled into a lane. “No, not this afternoon.”

“Don't you think you need to? Maybe you should be more aggressive.”

She frowned. “You don't think I've been aggressive enough?”

“Well, your first meeting with my parents will go a lot better if you're working someplace, positioned in your career. Shows them you're worthy of their son.” He chuckled.

Kelli had no words. Well, she had plenty, but none she could say.

“That last part was supposed to be a joke.”

“Right.” She pulled to a red light and watched the foot traffic, people leaving restaurants and heading back to work.

“Kelli? I hope you're not getting too discouraged over the job search. You've seemed . . . distant lately.”

“I have?” She pulled into a lane, blowing out a silent breath. She'd hoped it wasn't obvious.

“A little. Not calling as much, not talking as long. I figured it was either the job search or something else. I wondered if you were back in touch with your old boyfriend.”

“Brian? Oh, no worries where he's concerned. It's just been so busy with this transition back to life in St. Louis.” Was she talking faster than normal? Should she at least tell him she was working with Brian? Why was she inclined to keep it quiet?

“I understand,” he said. “It's only normal. But I miss the days when we could spend hours studying in the library on campus and grabbing a meal.” He paused. “I miss
you
, Kelli.”

“I miss you too, Miles.”

“Guess we're finding the new rhythm of our relationship. I'm hoping the melody is just as beautiful.”

She stared at the stretch of road before her, taken aback by his analogy. “Me too.” If he only knew how melodies figured into her life, into this very day.