Chameleon (Supernaturals) (37 page)

“I wondered sometimes,” I admitted. “I was curious what that would be like, or if you ever thought about it. But I was happy, so it didn’t matter.”

“It didn’t matter?”

I shrugged. “I always had you with me. That was enough.”

“What about the day you left? At the lake, and then when we kissed? Didn’t you feel something more than friendship between us then?”

I had to fight off sudden butterflies. “I don’t know.”

Russ was not satisfied with that answer. “You
don’t know
?”

“I was so surprised,” I said, defending myself. “And then there were the cravings too. I didn’t know what I was feeling. When you kissed me it was more of a goodbye than anything. It was a good kiss, but there was so much going on I didn’t really have time to think about it. Then when I thought I was never going to see you again I tried
not
to think about it. Thinking about you at all hurt too much.”

Russ smiled like I’d finally said something he wanted to hear. “What about right now?” he asked.

“What do you mean? What about right now?”

Russ’s smile vanished. “Dani.” He said my name as if he thought I was a moron.

He took his hand that wasn’t holding me to his side and laid it on my leg just above my knee. Something about the way he held it there made my heart jump into overdrive.

“I want to know what’s going through that pretty little head of yours right now,” he said. As he spoke he slid his hand up my thigh. He’d never been so aggressive with me. “What are you feeling?”

I swallowed hard and my body started to tremble. “I—I don’t know,” I said. Except I did know. And judging by the way Russ went from teasing to intense in the blink of an eye, I’m pretty sure he knew what I was feeling too.

He brought his hand up to my cheek and turned my face to his. I gasped when he traced my lips with his thumb. Then he leaned down and brushed his lips over mine. The feelings he was stirring in me were nearly impossible to control.

“Do you want me, Dani?” he whispered against my mouth.

I shuddered, and my answer came out before I could stop it. “Yes.”

He kissed me lightly. “
This
is how it should be with us.”

“But what about Gab—”

He kissed me again. “Forget about everything else right now. Just listen to your body.”

Russ’s hands began to wander and I could tell he was having a difficult time keeping them from roaming places likely to get him slapped. It was like being tortured all over again. His hand came to a stop on the center of my chest, over my heart. “Do you love me?” he asked.

“You know I do.”

“No, Dani, do you
love
me?” he asked again.

A wave of confusion washed over me. I couldn’t give him the answer that he wanted. “I don’t know.”

Russ’s lips finally came down on mine hard. I was torn between the desire to give in to him and the urge to flee for safety as he tried to coax me into kissing him back.

“Russ, stop. I can’t.”

“Yes, you can. Your anxiety is the Councilor talking. It’s not you.”

Russ tried to kiss me again and I was powerless to stop him until someone cleared their throat across the room. “I believe she asked you to stop.”

“Gabriel!” At the sound of his voice I tore myself away from Russ. I flew across the room and threw myself into the safety of his arms. When he gripped me in a tight hug I was overwhelmed with a relief that didn’t make any logical sense.

“Can you not see how upset she is?” Gabriel asked as I buried my face in his chest, apologizing over and over. “Why do you insist on confusing her?”

“Me?” Russ asked, jumping to his feet. “You’re the one who has her messed up. Dani, why do you keep running to this guy?”

I pulled myself out of Gabriel’s embrace and shouted angrily. “Because he’s my husband! I am
married
now, Russ. You can’t have me!”

“Your so-called
marriage
didn’t count!” Russ yelled back. “You never agreed to it. You love
me
. You know you do. Just admit it!”

“What do you want to hear Russ? That part of me spent my whole life waiting for you to see me as more than a friend and hating you because you didn’t? Do you really want to know that I finally felt complete for the first time in my life that day at the lake? Or that if it weren’t for Gabriel I would have stayed with you forever? Is that going to help either of us? Because I can’t do that now.”

“Why not? Because a group of strangers who shouldn’t have a say told you that you had to be with him?”

I looked at Gabriel and shook my head. “No. Because I care for him too, now.”

“How can you?” Russ roared. “You’ve only known him for a month!”

“I just do!”

I took Gabriel’s hand. He was standing there too shocked to do anything but watch Russ and I scream at each other. I smiled at him and said, “He’s so good. He has a bit of the Creator in him.”

“That’s the brainwashing talking,” Russ said. “I know you Dani. You’re a force to be reckoned with. You need someone strong—someone who will jump into danger with you. You need someone to match that fire inside you. There’s no way quiet little Shakespeare-quoting emo boy can be that guy for you. He’ll never be able to make you happy!”

Russ stopped yelling long enough to catch his breath then glared at Gabriel. “Whatever she feels for you is not real. You can trust me on that. You were there to pick up the pieces of a broken girl, but you will never have what we have.”

Gabriel dropped my hand. He looked pale as he walked out of the room. I called after him, but the front door slammed shut behind him and I whirled again on Russ. “You don’t have to be so mean!”

“I was just being honest. Even now, he won’t defend himself. He won’t fight for you, Dani. That’s not love.”

“Oh, and you’re the expert on love? The Councilor says you’re as screwed up as Gabriel and me.”

“I’m the expert on you. I know you. I know what you need.”

“What I need is for you to stop! No matter what feelings I have for you, it’s too late. The council gave me to Gabriel. Even your dad said I’m stuck.”

“And you’re just going to accept that? It’s not fair!”

“No, it’s not fair, but Gabriel is a good person!” I took a breath, and my voice became a plea. “I could be happy with him if you’ll let me.”

“Hell no!”

I was done arguing. There was no way to win this fight. No matter what the outcome, everyone was going to be hurt in some way. I clutched the amulet around my neck hoping it would give me the strength to say what needed to be said.

“Yes, I love you, Russ. I do. But I can’t give you what you want. You’re my best friend. That’s the kind of love I need from you now. If you can’t accept that then I’ll have to leave.”

With that I went outside to find Gabriel.

It was dark now and cold out—I could see my breath. Gabriel was leaning over the porch railing staring up at the stars. He didn’t look back when I approached.

“He was just being cruel because he’s hurt,” I said placing my hand on Gabriel’s shoulder.

“He is right though. I have seen first hand your fearless spirit. You do need someone strong who can match that passion. And what am I? I am not that man.”

Gabriel’s insecurity made me angry. I spun him around and forced him to look at me. “You
are
strong,” I insisted fiercely. “And you have more passion in you than anyone I’ve ever met. There’s a good inside you that no one on this earth can match. That’s why the Creator chose to bestow
you
with the gift of foresight.”

I grabbed Gabriel’s hand and laced our fingers together. When I spoke again my voice was so full of emotion that I could only whisper. “He’s wrong. Maybe I’m confused about where my heart is right now, but I’m also proud to be married to you.”

Gabriel still looked so sad and unsure of me. I couldn’t blame him though after he saw Russ and me in such an intimate position. I needed him to believe me. I needed him to know that I really cared about him, and I could think of only one way to do that. I pulled his hand to my lips and kissed his wedding ring.

“I accept this union, Gabriel. I accept it not for the prophecy, or destiny, or for the will of the council. I accept it for you.”

I heard the smallest gasp and hoped it was a good thing. I stepped so close to Gabriel that I had to tilt my head up to see into his eyes. “I’m sorry about Russ.”

Gabriel spoke so quietly I almost couldn’t make out the words. “You love him?”

“Yes,” I admitted. “I love him. But I care for you too and so I have to trust in the Creator. The Creator gave you that vision of me. And she’s given me several visions of you, including this very moment.”

Gabriel’s eyes grew wide. “You saw this?”

I nodded. “Of all the things the Creator could have shown me, I watched myself accept our destiny right here on this very porch. That’s why I was so scared.”

“And you let it happen?” Gabriel looked away from me and muttered, “I thought you wanted to change it.”

“I thought you said I shouldn’t.”

When Gabriel looked up in surprise I smiled. He started to reach for me but caught himself and shoved his hands in his pockets. “Thank you, Danielle.”

I pulled Gabriel’s hands back out of his pockets and placed them on either side of my face where he’d intended to put them. “Part of accepting this union means accepting you too.”

Gabriel immediately started to argue. “Danielle, you do not have to do that. I would not ask it of you. Your heart is with Russ.”

I shook my head. “But not only with Russ. I’ve asked him to leave me alone.”

Gabriel trembled slightly and tried to pull his hands back but I wouldn’t let him. “I’m not his to touch like this,” I said. “I’m yours. If you want me.”

Gabriel hesitated only a moment before lowering his lips to mine, but his kiss was still timid. It was so different from Russ’s passionate, lustful kisses but I could still feel how hungry he was for me behind his reservations. It made me want to help him get over his shyness. Unlike with Russ there was no hesitation now. No conflict. I kissed him with all the passion I had in me until finally he began to respond the way my body wanted him to.

Before we could get too carried away Alex made us aware of his presence. “You kids might want to take that to your room. You realize your auras grow stronger when you connect like that? My magic can only do so much to hide you.”

“Alex!” I practically leapt out of my skin at the interruption.

When I turned around Alex was sitting in the dark on the porch swing watching us with a curious, yet guarded expression.

“I’m sorry! We were just.…” My voice trailed off. It was pretty obvious what we were doing. “When did you get back?”

“About ten minutes ago.” Alex held up a cardboard cup. He was smiling. “You and Russ looked like you could use a few minutes of privacy so I stayed out here to finish my coffee.”

I blushed so hard Alex could see it despite having only the light of the moon. “Alex, I—I’m so sorry. I—”

“It’s all right, Dani. I understand. Considering the council’s decision I think accepting Gabriel shows a lot of maturity on your part.”

“Really?”

“Yes, really.”

I was so unbelievably relieved. Gabriel took my hand and pulled me close again. That was a huge relief too.

“So you won’t be mad if I choose Gabriel?”

“Of course not. I only feel sorry for you and Russ. I know how much you love each other. You shouldn’t have to be forced to make this decision.” Alex’s eyes slid to Gabriel. “And as for your feelings for him, well, those aren’t your fault either. What the Councilor has done to the two of you—”

“Just the Councilor?” Gabriel asked. “I believe the bond between Danielle and I is no more unnatural than the one between her and your son.”

I gasped but Gabriel did not back down. “The Councilor had a point Danielle. You admitted it yourself. The way you and Russ care only for each other is not normal.”

“But that wasn’t Alex’s fault. If he hadn’t stayed, I’d have been completely alone all those years. I would have come into the cravings and had no idea what was going on. Alex helped me.”

“And yet he never explained anything to you. He kept the truth of what you were, of the bond you felt with Russ, secret. For what purpose?”

“Gabriel!” I glanced worriedly at Russ’s dad. “I’m sorry Alex.”

“I’m not angry,” Alex assured me. “I can’t blame Gabriel for his suspicions. I’m not exactly a friend to the council that raised him.”

“Another point in which you have not been truthful to the children you claim to love.”

I was horrified by Gabriel’s sudden hostility but Alex wasn’t mad. He rose to his feet with a tired sigh. “It’s getting late and emotions are running very high around here tonight. Why don’t we all get some sleep and we’ll talk in the morning?”