He closed his eyes. As his body revved down, his remorse went up proportionately.
The gray kitten, who he’d started calling Smoky, had made a nest on his pillow. He picked up the little fuzz ball, stretched out on his back and set the cat on his chest. Unbothered, it closed its eyes and was sound asleep within seconds.
“At least one of us has no worries,” he said, rubbing its front paw. Contented, the cat flexed its needlelike claws.
Even with all his guilt and worry, he still wanted more of Faith. He could lie here and tell himself till he was blue in the face that he couldn’t touch her again, but he knew, if given another opportunity, he’d be hard-pressed to walk away.
For the first time, he allowed himself to consider the possibility of seeing her in secret. Away from work. Just enough for them to get each other out of their systems. No one had to know. His job wouldn’t suffer and his chances at the promotion wouldn’t be harmed. No one would be able to accuse Faith of getting special treatment from him.
God, what was he thinking? That wouldn’t be fair to Faith. She wasn’t the type to sneak around and deserved so much more than that.
Which brought him back to the same agonizing dilemma. He wanted her and he couldn’t goddamn have her.
Faith’s scent still lingered in the air and he couldn’t get her face out of his mind. Holding the cat against his chest, he sat up, replaced her on his pillow and headed to his office. If work could take his mind off his mother, then maybe it could take his mind off the vexing brunette, as well.
She happened to know Joe was on duty today, because she’d overheard her dad on the phone yesterday. Joe had taken someone else’s shift, as he frequently did, workaholic that he was. His work ethic reminded her of her father. Unless Joe had traded shifts, he was also scheduled to work with her tomorrow. She wondered if he would break down and sleep tonight, and that question brought to mind his room, his bed, his kisses….
She’d seen the engine return after a call about an hour ago, and caught a glimpse of him riding shotgun. That she was acting like a teenager with a crush disturbed her on some level, but she couldn’t help it, really. She’d made a mistake the other night by going to his room, but there was nothing she could do about it now.
“What is it you’re not telling us, Faith?” Mercedes sipped her margarita and set the cup back in the sand next to her lounger. “Who are you stalking at the fire station?”
Faith was lying on her front, the closest of the three to the station. She didn’t look at her friends. “I’m just admiring the trucks.”
“You don’t lie very well,” Nadia said, grinning.
To prove she wasn’t staring, Faith turned on her side and took the bag of corn chips from Nadia, helping herself to a handful. “Being involved with someone at work would not be a good idea.” Which, though possibly misleading, was one hundred percent true.
“If it was Mr. Right, exceptions could be made.” Nadia pushed her sunglasses up over her gorgeous blond hair and squinted toward the station. “I could use a Mr. Right Firefighter with Big Beautiful Muscles myself. Maybe it’s time to hang out at the Shell Shack some more.”
“I’ve been racking my brain for you,” Faith said. “None of them are bad-boy enough for your tastes.”
“What? No bad boys in the fire department? I don’t believe that for a minute,” Nadia said.
“There are a few rebels and troublemakers, but I wouldn’t really call them losers. Not your type.”
“Maybe she’s turning over a new leaf,” Mercedes said, flipping through the latest issue of
Cosmo
. “Going for someone with a job this time.”
“You two are evil,” Nadia said. “So I’ve made a couple bad decisions. I want to know more about who you’ve been watching for all afternoon, Faith.”
“Yeah, spill it, girl. Does it have anything to do with the all-nighter last week?”
Faith shoved a bunch of corn chip crumbs from the bottom of the bag into her mouth. As a stall? Maybe. “I told you about the captain. His mother was in intensive care. We spent the night in the waiting room.”
“Is his mom okay?” Nadia asked.
“She’s going to be. She finally turned a corner and they think she’ll go home in another week. Nice of you to ask,” Faith said drily.
“So, the captain, huh?” Mercedes said. “The one who was watching you at the bar that night?”
If she’d kissed anyone else, Faith would’ve fessed up to her friends in a heartbeat. But it was Joe. There was too much at stake. While Mercedes and Nadia would never outwardly accuse her of getting close to Joe for professional reasons, she couldn’t stand the possibility of anyone thinking that, even in passing.
“I’m going to throw this in the trash before it blows away.” Faith crumpled the empty chip bag as she got up, ignoring her friends’ comments about running away from their questions.
It was almost five o’clock and this part of the beach was clearing out. Most of the hard-core spring breakers were about a mile up, close to the bigger resorts and the frequent TV coverage. The trash cans were fifty feet or so away, placed out of reach of high tide. As Faith walked toward the nearest one, a man jogging down the beach in her direction caught her eye.
She knew that gait. That large, muscled body.
Her heart raced and she quietly called herself an idiot.
He’s the fire captain,
she coached herself.
Not the man you’ve been dreaming about at night.
“Pick up that pace,” she called. “You’re getting soft, Captain Mendoza.”
He slowed to a walk and came over to her. “‘Captain Mendoza’?” he questioned, low enough that no one else could hear, and Faith couldn’t help noticing—and liking—the way his eyes roved up and down her bikini-clad body.
She smiled easily, too happy to see him. “I call you soft and you take issue with the proper use of your title and name?”
He didn’t smile. “Everyone calls me Joe. If you start acting different now…”
Her grin was long gone. Something about his tone, his condescension, rubbed her wrong. “No one’s around who knows any differently, Joe.”
“I don’t think you realize—”
“I realize perfectly. I’m sorry I said anything at all, but then ignoring the captain as he runs by might raise a red flag, too.”
He wiped his forehead with the bottom of his T-shirt. “You’re right. I didn’t expect to see you here. Like
that
.” Again, he allowed his gaze to wander downward.
“My parka is back by my beach towel,” she said, pointing over her shoulder.
Joe looked where she indicated.
“Not really,” Faith said. “But we could go say hello to my beautiful friends. I could set you up with one of them. Then your problem would be solved.”
“I’m sorry, Faith. I’m not handling…
this
well. I’ve never been in this situation before.” He was obviously talking about more than just seeing her in a bikini on the beach.
“Considering I’m the first female in the department, I’m glad to hear that.”
He still didn’t crack a grin.
“Try to lighten up,” she said, wishing she could kiss his uptightness away. “Nobody knows, and it’s not going to happen again.”
“What if I want it to happen again?”
Faith’s breath caught and a weird lightness filled her chest.
“Wait,” Joe said before she could respond. “Forget I said that.”
Okay, then. Whiplash.
She hardened her expression. It wouldn’t do for him to know how much his admission had stirred her.
“I get it,” she said firmly.
“I need to get back to the station. PT time’s over.”
She nodded as awkwardness fell over them. “See you at work,
Joe,
” she said obediently.
He jogged off with a vague nod.
She watched him, unable to deny her appreciation of that body and the way he moved it. She had a hard time staying annoyed for more than fifteen seconds.
No, he wasn’t handling
this
well, but it was pretty much impossible for her to figure out how to navigate this thing between them, either.
His message was clear, though: there would never be a repeat of the other night.
She supported that decision. In theory.
So how to explain the tears that suddenly filled her eyes?
“What’s going on?” she asked.
“Have you talked to your father lately?”
A sick feeling swirled through her gut. “Not since yesterday. I stayed over at Mercedes’s house last night.”
“He hasn’t showed up for work yet today,” Joe said.
“It’s almost noon.” Faith frowned and tried to remember if he’d told her of any plans. “He didn’t call in?”
“No one’s heard from him.”
She pulled the cell phone out of her pants pocket and checked for messages, but found none. Maybe he was still in bed. She pressed the speed dial for his cell phone.
“I’ve tried both his numbers,” Joe said.
Ignoring him, she paced toward the main courtyard, listening to the empty rings on the line. When her dad’s voice mail finally picked up, Faith swore and hit End. Then she dialed their home number, praying he’d answer and everything was fine. Trying to ignore the rising nausea and the weird, uneasy feeling that all was not right.
The family voice mail started playing back in her ear. She let it finish, left her dad a message to phone her right away and ended the call. She leaned her elbows on the mural wall that curved around the courtyard, and tried to think of where her dad might be that he would ignore his phone.
Joe came up next to her. “Did you try your mom?”
She still held her phone, so she scrolled through her contacts to find her mom’s new number.
“Mom, have you seen Dad today?” she asked.
“Faith, I’ve been wanting to talk to you. I know you were upset by Craig—”
“I’m fine, but Dad is missing. Did he call you?”
“What do you mean, he’s missing?”
Gritting her teeth, Faith briefly explained what she knew.
“Faith, I have no idea.” To her mom’s credit, she sounded genuinely concerned. “I just saw him last night, but he didn’t mention anything.”
“Where’d you see him?”
“At the grocery store, across from the movie theater. Craig and I were picking up something for dinner, and your father was grabbing takeout from the Chinese counter.”
“Craig was with you?” The rock in Faith’s gut sank deeper.
“We’d just gone to a matinee.”
Faith closed her eyes. “Mom, did he know Craig was
with
you?”
“I introduced them. He seemed fine. What else was I supposed to do, Faith? It was awkward, but we’re all adults.”
How about don’t move out in the first place?
“Maybe he’s at a doctor’s appointment or something,” Faith said. “But meeting your boyfriend might not have gone over as well as you’d like to think, Mom.”
“I didn’t plan it that way. I’ll call Will and Paul and see if they’ve heard from him today.”
Faith doubted her dad would call her brothers, even the two who checked in most often, but it was worth a try.
“Let me know. I’m at work.” The alarm sounded over the intercom. “I have to go.”
She and Joe headed inside to hear the details of the emergency. It was a car accident, so the engine and the ambulance would respond. Faith and Joe were assigned to the truck for the day, so they stayed put.
“Your mom saw him last night?” Joe asked as they walked off the apparatus floor, back into the station.
“She and her boyfriend.” Faith couldn’t help the anger that laced her words. She followed Joe into his office.
“I kind of gathered. Same guy you met?”
“Same guy. Pretty sure my dad had no idea before that.” Faith sat down hard on the chair in front of Joe’s desk, racking her brain. “Did you call Leo Romero?” The mayor of San Amaro was also one of her dad’s good friends. Maybe he knew something.
“Wasn’t sure if I should. It might be nothing. Maybe he fell asleep in a lawn chair in your backyard or something.”
“It’s been hours since he was supposed to be in. But you’re right. Let’s leave Leo out of it for now.”
“Does he have any other good friends besides the mayor?”
“The police chief.” Faith chuckled humorlessly. “This job is his best friend, I’m afraid.”
“Why don’t you run home to see what’s going on?”
“Who’s going to cover for me?”
“The three of us can handle things until the engine returns. Won’t take you long. If we get a call, you can catch up.”
She hated the idea, but concern for her dad overrode her worries about work. “It’ll take me fifteen minutes, tops.” Faith hurried out of Joe’s office to her car.
A short time later, Faith was back at the station with no answers. There’d been no sign of her father at home, nothing unusual or out of place. His truck was missing, so he’d obviously gone somewhere of his own will. The question was where?