Authors: Mandasue Heller
Tags: #Thrillers, #Fiction, #General, #Mystery & Detective, #Crime
‘Where have you been?’ she demanded. ‘I was shouting you.’
‘Nipped out for a smoke,’ he lied. ‘Nearly choked on it when Steve told me what was going on.’
Amy spotted a smudge on his cheek and jabbed it with her finger. ‘That’d better not be lipstick, ’cos if you’ve been messing around, I swear to God—’
‘Don’t be daft.’ Mark rubbed his cheeks to remove the evidence. ‘It’ll be off that aunt of yours. She’s been following me around all day.’
Another contraction robbed Amy of the energy to continue the argument. ‘Oh, Mum, it hurts,’ she cried.
‘Whatever you do, don’t start pushing,’ Sonia ordered. ‘Just breathe slow and hang on for the ambulance.’
‘Anything I can do?’ John asked, wringing his hands behind them. He’d managed to swerve away from Amy’s birth and had no clue how to deal with this.
‘Yeah, keep your big gob shut and your eyes to yourself,’ Sonia snapped, still fuming about him flirting with Amy’s friends.
The door opened and Ginger Jenny walked in. Blushing guiltily when all eyes turned her way, she self-consciously smoothed her frizzy hair. ‘The, er, the ambulance is here.’
‘Don’t leave me,’ Amy wailed when Mark stood up to make way for the paramedics.
‘Don’t worry, I’m not going nowhere,’ he assured her.
‘Promise?’ She clung to his hand.
‘Babe, I’m about to be a dad,’ he reminded her proudly. ‘
Nothing
’s gonna stop me being there.’
Three hours later, baby Cassie had been delivered, cleaned, and fed – with a bottle, Amy having already decided that she would rather die than let anyone get even an accidental flash of her breasts. Cassie was fast asleep in a perspex cot beside the bed now, and Amy was gazing down at her in wonder.
‘Isn’t she gorgeous?’ she purred, unable to believe that she had produced such a perfect little creature.
‘The bomb,’ Mark agreed, reaching for Amy’s hand. ‘I know I ain’t always been the best, but you and that little girl are my world now and I’m gonna look after you like a proper husband and dad. Soon as I get home I’m gonna go through the paper and look for a job.’
Amy’s eyes welled up and a tear trickled slowly down her cheek. ‘I love you,’ she whispered.
‘Love you, too,’ said Mark, glancing at his watch. ‘Right, I’m off, before me mum thinks I’m stopping out and puts the bolts on.’
‘Can’t you stay?’ Amy pleaded, nervous of being on her own with the baby. She’d babysat for other people’s kids a few times but they had always been in bed by the time she got there so she’d never had to do anything. If Cassie woke in the middle of the night and started crying, she wouldn’t have a clue what to do with her.
‘What, and sleep on a chair when I’ve got a perfectly good bed at home?’ Mark gave her a come-on-now look.
‘I’m scared,’ she admitted, her chin wobbling.
‘You’ll be fine,’ Mark assured her, leaning down to kiss her before backing towards the door. ‘You’re gonna be a great mum – everyone says so.’
‘Do you think so?’ Amy sniffed.
‘Deffo.’ Mark opened the door. ‘You’ve got the nurses to help you out if you need a hand, and I’ll be back first thing.’
‘Promise?’
Mark winked and slipped out quietly.
Amy wiped her eyes, then snuggled down and gazed at the slim gold band on her finger. Everyone had said they wouldn’t last, but she and Mark had proved them all wrong. And now they had their beautiful daughter, the council would have to hurry up and give them a house of their own. It was kind of Mark’s mum to let them move in with her but Amy didn’t want to stay for one minute longer than she absolutely had to. She wanted it to be just her, Mark and Cassie in their own little palace. And when that dream came true, nothing and nobody would ever wipe the smile off her face.
‘Who does she look like?’ Ginger Jenny asked, sitting up when Mark had finished and swiping her hair out of her eyes.
‘Spit of me,’ Mark said proudly as he rolled over and reached into his jacket pocket for his cigarettes and lighter. ‘Proper little stunner, she is. Loads of jet-black hair, and this dead cute little nose.’
Jenny turned her head and made a gagging face. She wasn’t the remotest bit interested in the kid and had only asked so he wouldn’t think she was being funny. It had been sickening enough watching him act all loved-up with that stupid bitch Amy at the reception. But she really felt like puking, listening to him spout off about the brat like it was some kind of fairy princess.
Mark lit up and lay back against the pillow. ‘What’s up with you?’ He squinted at Jenny through the swirling smoke.
‘Nothing.’ She turned back with a smile. ‘I was just thinking I’d best open the window. My mum’ll be back in a bit, and she’ll kick off if she thinks I’m smoking.’
Mark decided it was time to leave. He’d only called round to finish what he’d started earlier on, and now that he’d shot his load he was bored.
‘You don’t have to go,’ Jenny said when he reached for his trousers. ‘Just blow it out of the window so my mum can’t smell it.’
‘Nah, I need some kip.’
‘When am I going to see you again?’
‘Dunno.’ Mark shrugged and stuffed his shirt tails in. ‘I’m gonna be pretty tied up with the baby from now on. Oh, and not a word about me coming round here tonight. If Amy finds out, I’ll know who to blame, won’t I?’
‘Didn’t bother you a minute ago,’ Jenny said sulkily.
‘Yeah, well, I’m a dad now,’ Mark reminded her. ‘I’ve got responsibilities.’
When he turned and walked out, Jenny noticed that he’d left his cigarettes and was about to shout after him. But she changed her mind. Why should she do him any favours after the way he’d just spoken to her?
She heard the front door close down below and lit one of the cigarettes. Then she knelt on the bed to watch through the gap at the bottom of the net curtain as Mark hopped over the gate and sauntered down the road.
‘
I’m a dad now
,’ she mimicked under her breath.
‘I’ve got responsibilities
. Yeah, well, let’s see if Amy lets you anywhere near the kid after I tell her what we’ve just done.’
A taxi turned onto the road. Guessing that it was her mum, Jenny took a last tug on her smoke and flicked the butt into next door’s garden before hopping back into bed. As much as she’d have loved to set Amy straight, she’d never have the guts to actually do it. Not only because Amy would kick the living crap out of her, but because Mark would probably never speak to her again. And, as angry as she’d been a minute ago, there was no way she was risking that.
She had worshipped Mark Taylor for years and had tried everything to get him to notice her, to no avail. Until tonight, when he’d not only noticed her but had dragged her away from her job helping her mum on the community-centre bar and made love to her on the other side of the wall from where his new wife had just gone into labour. And then he’d turned up here at the house straight after the birth of his baby and made love to her again, which must mean that he was interested.
Reassured, Jenny stroked the indentation that Mark’s head had left in the pillow and held his Clipper lighter against her breast. So what if he’d put a ring on that stupid cow’s finger and had a baby with her? That didn’t mean anything. He was only sixteen and everyone knew that teenage boys couldn’t stand kids. She’d give him two weeks, max, before he got bored and came back to her for seconds.
PART ONE
FIVE YEARS LATER
1
Mark slammed his fork down and glared at Amy across the table. ‘Don’t you ever stop fucking nagging?’
‘I wouldn’t have to if you came home when you were supposed to.’ Amy jabbed her own fork into a lump of leaden mash. ‘This was lovely when I made it, but look at the state of it now.’
‘I was working. What am I supposed to do when the gaffer asks me to stay back? Tell him to fuck off, ’cos I’m gonna be late for me dinner?’
‘You could have rung to let me know.’
‘And get into trouble for using my phone at work?’ Mark shook his head in disgust and shoved his plate away. ‘You do my head in, you. All day I’m out there grafting, and all I get when I come home is nag, nag, fuckin’ nag. I don’t know why I bother.’
Amy looked down at her plate and pushed her shrivelled peas into a heap beside the mash. Maybe she was turning into a nag, but it wasn’t easy being stuck in the house on her own all day with two kids to look after. It was all right for Mark, he could escape to work and have a laugh with his mates. But she was trapped in here day in, day out, with nothing but the washing, cooking, cleaning, shitty nappies and tantrums to keep her company. And Mark saw little enough of the kids as it was, so the least he could do was come home in time to see them for two minutes before they went to bed.
‘I’m going out,’ Mark said suddenly.
Amy jerked her head up at the sound of his chair scraping back. ‘You’ve only been back five minutes. Just sit down and eat your tea.’
‘Lost me appetite.’ Mark strode out into the hall and snatched his jacket off the hook.
‘Don’t you dare go out and leave me on my own again,’ Amy yelled after him. ‘Mark . . . I’m warning you. I’m not joking.’
His answer was a harder than usual slam of the front door.
‘
Bastard!
’ She hurled her plate at the wall.
A few seconds later, the back door creaked open and Marnie from next door poked her head in. ‘Is it safe?’
Amy nodded, and swiped at her tears.
‘What was it this time?’ Marnie stepped over the broken plate and eyed the mixture of mince, mash, peas and gravy that was sliding down the wall.
‘The usual.’ Amy stood up and snatched the dishcloth off the sink drainer. ‘I’ve had a horrible day, but he doesn’t give a toss. He just strolls in late and expects me to wait on him hand and foot.’
‘That’s men for you.’ Marnie plonked herself down on the chair that Mark had just vacated and watched as Amy wiped the mess off the wall. ‘They’re all over you till they’ve got you, then they think they can treat you like shit. Wankers, the lot of ’em.’
‘He’s not that bad,’ said Amy, automatically jumping to his defence like she always did when someone dared to criticise him. ‘I’m just stressed out ’cos the kids have been playing me up. I shouldn’t have taken it out on him.’
Marnie gave her a knowing look. ‘You don’t have to cover for him on my behalf, hon. I’ve heard the way he talks to you, and I think he’s got a damn cheek calling you a nag.’
Amy turned her back and angrily rinsed out the dishcloth before reaching for the dustpan and brush and sweeping up the broken crockery. Nosy bitch must have had a glass up against the wall if she’d heard him say
that
.
‘Oh, leave it,’ Marnie urged when Amy reached for Mark’s plate after depositing the rubbish in the bin. ‘No point wearing yourself out, you won’t get any thanks for it. Come round to mine and chill for a bit. I’ve got some wine.’
‘The kids are in bed,’ Amy told her, scraping the remains of Mark’s dinner off the plate.
‘They must be asleep by now. They’ll be all right for half an hour.’
‘No, I can’t leave them. Mark will go mad if he comes back and I’m not here.’
‘You’ll be lucky. He’ll be halfway to the pub by now. You won’t see him again tonight.’
Amy’s heart sank. Marnie was right. Once Mark hooked up with his mates and got the first few pints down his throat, he’d forget all about her and the kids. The mood he was in when he left, he’d probably crash at Steve’s, then crawl home after work tomorrow full of apologies. That was how it usually panned out when he stormed off after a row.
Marnie’s phone beeped. She took it out of her pocket, read the message and jumped to her feet. ‘Oh, shit! Sorry, hon, got to go. I forgot Neil was coming round tonight. He’s waiting outside, and I can’t risk Fat Gemma seeing him or she’ll be straight on the phone to his missus. See you tomorrow.’
Amy locked the door behind her, then finished clearing up and went into the living room. The kids had been watching
CBeebies
before they went to bed, and stuffed toys were still prancing noisily around on the TV screen. She reached for the remote to turn it over, but hesitated when she caught sight of herself in the mirror above the fire. Her wedding photo, in pride of place on the mantelpiece below, showed a heavily pregnant girl with gleaming blonde hair, sparkling blue eyes, and a mile-wide smile. But the woman staring back at her from the mirror was a scrawny, dull-eyed, straw-haired replica of her mother. Worse, her
nan
. No wonder Mark couldn’t be bothered to hurry home from work if this was all he had to look forward to.
Blinking back the tears of self-pity that were stinging her eyes when a peal of raucous laughter floated through the wall, Amy released a weary sigh. Mark had his faults, there was no denying that, but at least he wasn’t a cheat like that pig Neil Foster.
His
poor wife had no clue what he was getting up to behind her back, and Amy hated bumping into her at the shops because she always felt as guilty as hell even though it had nothing to do with her.
Disgusted by the grunting sounds that were starting to filter through now, Amy decided to get an early night. Most of her and Mark’s problems stemmed from the fact that he was always knackered from working so hard and she was always stressed out from dealing with the kids, so a good sleep would do her the world of good. Then, hopefully, she wouldn’t be so quick to bite Mark’s head off when he came home tomorrow – and he wouldn’t be so quick to storm out again.
As Amy headed up to bed back home, Mark walked into The Junction and looked around for his mates, in desperate need of some light-hearted man-banter to shake him out of the mood that Amy had put him in. She was turning into a right old woman lately, always whining and bitching and making him feel like a cunt for coming home five minutes late. He loved his kids as much as she did, but he could do without having them forced down his throat every time he stepped through the door. And as for all that bedtime kissy-cuddly shit that Amy wanted him to do, that was
her
job, not his.