Breaking Normal (Dream Weaver #3) (5 page)

Chapter 7  Can’t Remember to Forget You

              I sat propped up on pillows in a chair by the French doors to the patio. Daylight flooded through and cast a checkered pattern across the floor.

             
“So—why is death a big deal to a Caphar? We can just regenerate, right?” I asked.

             
Nick’s eyes darkened and his brow tensed as he watched me from the rocking chair. His index fingers steepled, and tapped his lower lip like I’d seen Sabre do a hundred times. “Every death we die takes another piece of our soul.”

             
“Seriously?”

             
“I don’t know how else to explain it. The more often we ‘die’, the less—human we become. I guess.”

             
“But if you’d just let me die…”

             
He winced, turned his face away and closed his eyes.

             
“If you had,” I pressed, “I’d just have come back, right?”

             
The memories of my plunge from the suspension bridge Downtown lanced through my mind. My heart relived the crush of his, the flood of anguish compressed his mind until it ached. Mine ached vicariously.

              I dropped my head into my hands and rubbed my temples.

             
“I just—I couldn’t do it again, Em. I couldn’t watch you die again.” The words leaked from his constricted throat. “You don’t understand what it does to me.”

             
So this had more to do with Nick not being able to watch me die than it had to do with saving my soul.

             
“Emari? Could we…” Nick choked on whatever words he was trying to force out. I gazed at him through sore, swollen eyes. “Could we just—I don’t know—start over? Like with all the cards on the table?”

             
“I don’t know, Nick.” Everything inside me screamed YES! Everything inside me, except that one dark something that wasn’t quite ready to let go of the anger.

             
“Will you think about it?” he pressed.

             
“I guess.”

             
Nick kneeled down beside my chair, clutching my hand in his like man about to propose. “I love you Emari. I think I’ve known from the moment I stepped into your nightmares. And I—believe you still love me—even within all your rage at me.” I couldn’t deny it. It was right there spurring my heart into a run. “Maybe…”

             
“Maybe—when all of this over—when Thomas is dead…”
Yes, for sure, Thomas must die. If not for anything else, for the deaths of my parents.
“Maybe once life returns to something that vaguely resembles normal. Maybe then.” Normal was a life without the Rephaim, without supernatural powers going haywire around me. Normal was a day spent on the couch with my pup and my girl and wearing my zombie sheep jammies all day. But this?

             
Nick nodded, satisfied with the answer, as I puzzled over my current state of dress. Someone had put me in soft, warm, grinning skull pajamas. Rather optimistic of them.

             
“Um…how did my clothes get changed?” I asked perplexed. Nick’s face flushed and he stammered for a moment. “You?”

             
He raised his hands in surrender. “No. No. The girl—uh—Emma. Your clothes were soaked and bloody. We had to get them off you. But Emma was the one who…” I scowled at him, trying to decipher if that was the truth. “Um, I think Adrian has a question or twenty for us.” I grunted at him. “Are you ready? Did you need to phase once more?”

             
“No. I’ll never be ready. And yes, another Caphar moment is definitely in order.”

             
“Shall I go with you?”

             
“Nah. It’s all good.”

             
I phased from the room and almost immediately phased back in. Nick wrapped an arm around my waist and guided me into the living room where Adrian, Emma and Sabre sat in cold silence. I waved away their attempts to help. It was only due to necessity that I allowed Nick’s assistance.

             
Before we could deal the cards in this game of Who’s Who, a flash of white and black outside in the driveway caught my attention.
Shit!
The cops had no doubt found the wrecked T-bird by now. To my surprise, a familiar face exited the police cruiser. Officer Molly. The female cop who had befriended me after the rape. How was I going to explain all of this to her? Nick, Sabre and I shared our thoughts then conveyed them to Adrian and Emma. Despite expecting it, the thunder of Molly’s knock rattled my nerves. Sabre opened the door.

             
“Yes,” he droned, almost malevolent.

             
“Uh. Is Emari Sweet here?”

             
“She is.” Sabre waved her in.

             
I tried to get up but Nick pressed me back onto the couch with a subtle shake of his head. Adrian rose to meet Molly with an extended hand.

             
“Officer,” he said feigning calm. “I’m Dr. Adrian Rovnikov.” I noticed he emphasized ‘Dr.’

             
“I’m Officer Elliot of the Spokane Police Department. I need to speak with Miss Sweet.” Wow, she was being all formal and everything.

             
“I’m here.” My voice was still hoarse and weak.

             
Molly turned her attention on me. “The State Patrol found a vehicle that was registered in your name.”
Emari, what happened?!
Poor Molly wanted so badly to drop the professional persona and find out what happened, but she struck her usual cop pose and remained stern. Though her eyes darted around the room to each of us. “You just purchased the vehicle yesterday?”

             
“Yeah. Guess it was a little too much car for me.” I gritted my teeth and entertained the thought of haunting that salesman’s dreams for being such a sexist perv.

             
Molly cringed. “We thought perhaps the car had been stolen.” She took out her pen and notepad and flipped it open. “A motorist spotted the skid marks and reported it early this morning. We got crews down there expecting to find a body—or at least an injury, but the car was empty.”

             
“Emari called us to come get her,” Nick offered.

             
One of Molly’s eyebrows inched up her forehead. “How did you just walk away from a crash like that?”

             
“Lucky I guess,” I feigned innocence.

             
“The Troopers said there was blood everywhere,” she countered.

             
“Just a bump on the head. You know how head wounds bleed,” I said. And a shudder raced through me as the memory of my conversation with the medic after the assault sliced through my mind.

             
“Have you been to the hospital? None of them had any record of you.”

             
“Aw, that’s where I came in,” said Adrian. “I have equipment in my office. I did x-rays and a thorough exam to be sure she was all right.” Dang, Adrian was good at this spur of the moment cover story stuff. Maybe a little too good.

             
“Why wasn’t the accident reported?” Molly countered.

             
“We were just discussing that when you arrived,” I told her.

             
“Well, the vehicle’s been towed and the county will most likely assess a fine for leaving the scene and towing charges. The car was totaled. I hope you had insurance.”

             
I cringed. “Yeah no. I hadn’t quite gotten to that part yet.”

             
Molly scowled and I knew she was contemplating adding a ticket for being uninsured to the list of my fines. Her shoulders rose and fell with a sigh of resignation. “The State Patrol will need you to come in and do some paperwork,” she finally said.

             
“Sure. Whatever you need…but you’re a city cop. Isn’t this the jurisdiction of the State Patrol?”

             
“It is. But—I already had a reason to come out here and we work cooperatively with the Troopers.”

             
“Oh? What did you need to see me about?” Writhing snakes squirmed in my stomach. I knew why she was here. The trial for Rico DeLaRosa, the man who attacked me, was coming up soon. They’d need me to testify against him.

             
“Um…” Officer Molly’s eyes darted around the room and finally rested on Emma as if she was noticing her for the first time. “Perhaps we could speak in private?”

             
I glanced around the room and a familiar heat flushed through my veins. Anger. “That won’t be necessary. We don’t keep any secrets from each other here.” All but Sabre lowered their eyes. I gave a quiet snort of laughter, and Molly nodded at Emma.

             
“Oh, I can take a hint,” retorted Emma. “This is grown up stuff.” She flounced away and swiped Eddy from Sabre, who’d been sitting in a dark corner of the dining room running the pup’s long ears over his fingers. She stomped across the porch and down the steps to the yard.

             
“We believe,” began Molly once Emma was outside, “that Mr. DeLaRosa has other victims out there somewhere. Some that may be too frightened or embarrassed to identify themselves. We’d like to find them—to build the case against him, and to get them some help.”

             
Nick angled himself between me and the cop. “What is it you want from Emari?”

             
“Um, well, Chief Houser was wondering if you’d be willing to do a sort of public address. An appeal for others to report what’s happened to them.”

             
“No.” Nick’s vehemence startled me. “No way. You can’t ask her to go public with the worst day of her life.” Well, that was debatable. I placed a hand on his arm.
Calm down. It’s okay.

             
Adrian stepped in. “I don’t think that’s a good idea, Officer, given what Emari’s been through.”

             
“I understand,” she said. I noticed, with a touch of morose glee, that she didn’t ask him to call her Molly.
Not feeling very friendly towards him, Molly? Yeah, me neither.

             
“I want to see him,” I said. There was a collective gasp in the room and all the color drained from Molly’s face.

             
“I…I don’t think…” she stammered.

             
“No,” repeated Nick.

             
I shoved his hand off my shoulder. Who did he think he was anyway? And I wasn’t done being mad at him yet. “That’s not up to you. I just—I need to know in my heart that it’s him. I don’t need to be in the same room. You’ve got those rooms with two-way glass, right?”

             
“Are you saying your original ID of him is wrong?” Molly’s creeping eyebrows crunched together in worry.

             
“No. No, it’s not that. I just—I can’t explain it. I just need to see his face.” I couldn’t explain, not quite even to myself. But I had to see his eyes. I had to see if the macabre shadows of Sabre’s torturous memory weave still danced in his pupils. And, I could reach through the glass and extricate the memories of the girls he’d raped. Maybe get them much-needed help.

             
Molly stammered. “Uh, I’ll see if we can facilitate it for you, Em.” Her cop persona was slipping at the edges and her friend persona was peeking out. I stood to my feet, with the assistance of Nick’s arm, a little wobbly at first and went to stand before her. Her warm fingers seared my cold hands.

             
“It’ll be okay,” I told her with an encouraging smile that twisted into a more mischievous grin.
These aren’t the droids you’re looking for.
It was coping mechanism, finding something humorous even in the bleakest situations. But I needed her to believe it would definitely be okay. I needed her to champion my cause to her chief. “If you’ll do this for me, tell your chief I’ll do a one-on-one interview with Sunny Sykes from K5, and put out a plea for the other girls. Sunny’s the only reporter I’d feel comfortable with.”

             
No!
A growl rumbled in Nick’s throat.

             
Back off, Jackson.
I warned him.

             
I walked Molly to the door, still holding her hand. I squeezed her fingers. “I’m really okay, Molly. You don’t have to worry so much,” I whispered.

             
She squeezed back. “I’ve been worried about you,” she confessed. “I stopped by a few weeks ago. Your car was here and the lights were on, but no one answered my knock. Something just felt—off.” Molly must have stopped by while I was dead—while I was becoming Caphar. I pressed a soothing balm into her mind.