Betrayal (The Forever Series) (2 page)

I awake, anxious and covered in sweat. I am nervous about going to see Constantine. It is ridiculous really. I have no idea why I am nervous. Perhaps because after all this time I am worried that
he
won’t want
me
anymore, that he has decided he can live without me in his life. Even though I told him not to contact me, that I wanted nothing to do with him, I expected that he would, even half hoped that he would. But he hasn’t. Not one word, to anyone, and I am worried. What if he has forgotten that today is the day we agreed I would either turn up at
Ponte
if I wanted him back, or not if I didn’t. What if he is there with someone else? Or just not at all? A mild panic sets in and it triggers Cole’s senses and he wakes suddenly.

“You okay?” he mumbles.

“Yes fine, baby. Go back to sleep,” I tell him as I climb out of bed. A shower and then off I go. It’s still early, only 6 AM, but the sooner I get this over with the better.

I stand under the jets and Cole joins me in the bathroom. “I’m not going to ask you not to go,” he says, as I turn from him expecting exactly that. “I just want to tell you that I love you, and I will be waiting on the jet in Florence for you to take you home.”

I look up at him in surprise and ask, “You are going to come with and wait for me?”

“Yes,” he says. “Don’t sound so surprised. You are my wife, and I told you last night that I want to spend every second I can with you. I am not sitting around here waiting for you to fly back when I can go with you and we can leave from there.”

“You are perfect,” I say to him with a smile.

“I know,” he says returning my smile. “Now, let’s do this. The sooner we get there, the sooner we can get home.”

“My thoughts exactly,” I say.

“I love you,” he whispers.

“I love you too,” I say. He steps into the shower and reaches for me, but I turn my back and he snatches his hands back quickly with a curse.

“Sorry,” he mumbles and I freeze for a moment.

I force myself to relax and say, “It’s okay, baby. I want you…just not in here, okay?”

“Of course,” he says quietly and takes the soap from me that I am digging my nails into. He turns off the jets and carries me out of the shower and to the bedroom. He looks to me for the go ahead and I kiss him, letting him know he can take me now.
Which he does, gently and insistently.

Ever since the incident with Aelfric, shower sex has been off the menu. It used to be one of my favorite places to be with the man I loved, but now I can’t bear it. I am overcome with mild panic attacks and it is somewhat of a mood killer. I couldn’t say for sure why it still affects me so badly. It’s not like I have never been abused before, but this last time just keeps rearing its ugly head. Maybe because I am supposed to be all
Powerful, and with the flick of his wrist he had bound my Dragon Powers and rendered me all but useless against him. Still, with all the bad, some good did come out of it. Tiamat accelerated my Power growth and I am now officially the most Powerful creature in all the Realms (with the exception of Her, of course). Even Remiel seems to have retreated. He appears to be off sulking somewhere and I haven’t seen him for weeks. Not that I am complaining after his little Vampire bombshell.

After Cole has made love to me, I jump back in the shower and quickly clean up before getting dressed. It is a pain that we have to fly to Italy, but in order to get back into England officially it has to be this way.

Landing in Florence, I kiss Cole goodbye and make my way into the airport. I had half expected Nico to be there to pick me up, but he isn’t. Now, I am very worried. CK keeps an apartment here in Florence, which I make my way to so that I can Astral to the castle. My palms are sweating as I unlock the door and step inside. Closing the door quickly, I don’t think about it as I close my eyes and picture where I want to be. I open them again and find myself in the Entrance Hall of
Ponte
.

It is deathly quiet.

I wince as my heels clack on the old stone floor as I make my way over to the stairs. In a flash, Marguerite is standing in front of me, blocking my way.

“Ma’am,” she says coldly and I raise my eyebrow at her. “You are not to go up there.”

“Get out of my way, Marguerite. He is expecting me.” Never mind that this is still also my castle--unless he somehow managed to get my name removed from the deeds. I wouldn’t put it past him. Stubborn fool.

“He doesn’t want to see you,” she says, arms crossed over her chest defensively, but I can see the quivering of her lip.

I admire her boldness in defense of her Master. She knows I could knock her on her arse with a flick of my fingers (oh yeah, I am badass now) but still she stands there.

“I won’t ask again,” I warn her and after a moment she slinks to the side.

“I can’t stop you, but I ask that you don’t go up there,” she says quietly.

“Why?” I ask suspiciously. “Is he with someone?”

She shakes her head, but doesn’t say anything else. Well, screw this. I ungracefully take the stairs two at a time and head straight for his bedroom. Our bedroom. Empty, and it doesn’t look like it has been used either. I gulp and know exactly where he is as I turn and make my way down the corridor to my old bedroom.

I pause outside the door.

He will know I am here, hovering on the other side, so I might as well just push it open. I do and step into the gloom. He is over on the bed and he groans and turns away from the light coming in through the door. I close it quickly and step forward.

“Constantine,” I say to his back, as he doesn’t turn around to greet me.

Silence.

I narrow my eyes at him and then take in the room. Oh dear.
No wonder Marguerite didn’t want me coming up here. It is a disaster.
He
is a disaster. There are empty bottles of Scotch strewn all over the room, my candles that I kept in here have long since burned right down into molten puddles of wax all over the ancient bedside cabinet, no doubt ruining it. The bed covers are all in dusty disarray and he is lying in the middle of the bed, on his side, in a crumpled shirt and suit pants, with no socks on. He doesn’t look like he has changed since he got here. I am shocked at his appearance. He is one of the vainest people I know, even more so than me, and that is saying something.

I cross over to the side of the bed. “Constantine,” I say again.

“Why are you here?” he asks, still turned away from me. “You should have stayed away.”

“Why?” I ask him, confused. “We agreed to this day. Did you doubt that I would come? Did you not want me to come for you?”

He sits up and then grabs another bottle of Scotch from the floor beside the bed. He turns to face me and I draw in my breath. “You shouldn’t have come. I don’t deserve you. I am not worthy of you.”

I stare at him. His eyes are black, his cheeks are hollow, his skin is a sickly yellow color, and he looks like he hasn’t shaved since I last saw him. He is scruffy and that is not something that I have ever seen on him. He prefers clean-cut, always has, regardless of fashion.

“What on Earth?” I ask him, sitting down heavily as my knees give out.

“Just go, Aefre,” he says and takes a long drink of the Scotch.

I snatch it off him and he doesn’t even fight me as he sways slightly, his eyes going unfocused.

He is drunk!

I don’t think I have ever seen a Vampire drunk before. This can only mean two things: one, he hasn’t fed in a good long while and two, the amount of alcohol he has consumed must be a distillery’s worth.

“When was the last time you fed?” I ask him carefully.

“Before the last time I saw you,” he slurs and leans back against the headboard, closing his eyes.

“Three months ago?” I shriek at him. “You haven’t fed at all in three months?
Constantine, why?” I grab his hand and squeeze it tightly.

“I deserve to be punished for what I did to you,” he says, opening his eyes and trying to focus on my face.

“No, no, my love. This is too much,” I say desperately. “You need to feed.” I offer him my wrist, but he just glances at it before looking away.

“Why did you come here?” he asks me.

“To bring you home. I have missed you. I love you,” I say quietly.

He squeezes his eyes tightly shut and opens them again. “Are you really here?” he asks me in a daze.

“Yes, my love. I am here to take you back. Please, you need to feed.” I offer him my wrist again. He pushes me away.

“Do you forgive me? Do you forgive my actions? Say you forgive me,” he begs me.

“I do forgive you. Drink.”

“I will hurt you if I feed from you,” he says absently. “I will never hurt you again.”

“Constantine,” I snap at him. “You will feed right now. Stop being such a stubborn idiot.” I pull on the neckline of my shirt to offer him my neck now, needing him to take from me. I do realize that offering a starving Vampire--and an Initial Vampire at that--myself to drink from is probably the stupidest idea I have ever had, and I’ve had plenty of those, but he can’t drain me. I don’t think, anyway. I guess we will find out as his eyes linger on my neck and narrow into two thin slits and he licks his lips as his fangs descend. “You swear that you are here to claim me back as your sire and your lover?” he asks. “Swear to me that is why you are here and not because of some pity mission to get me to feed.”

“I swear to you, Constantine. I love you and I need you. I need you back in my life. I can’t live without you.” I don’t get to say anything else as he launches himself at me with more strength than I expected, flattening me underneath him on the bed. He latches onto me, his fangs piercing my flesh painfully hard as his hands fist tightly into my hair. He is sucking at such a rate I can actually feel the blood leaving my body and he has reached the limit and gone past it in record time. I gasp as he bites me even harder, groaning deep in his throat. I start to feel a bit woozy and I am glad that I am lying down, but still he feeds from me. When I am convinced that somehow he is going to drain me dry, that he is taking too quickly for me to regenerate, he stops sucking. He keeps his fangs where they are though, in my neck, and he whimpers. He releases my hair before he does his fangs and whispers, “I’m sorry,” before he kisses me. I bring my hands up to his chest and push him off me. He looks hurt and then angry that I have denied him.

“You lied to me,” he hisses. “You said you wanted me back.”

“And I do, my love, but before you come anywhere near me again, you are going to shower and change. You reek,” I say in disgust and he laughs and looks down at himself.

“Yes, I suppose I do,” he admits sheepishly. Now that he has fed, he is all better. Good for him. I feel like crap. I’ll be okay in a few minutes I hope, but in the meantime I’ll just lie here while he goes to clean up.

“Are you okay?” he asks quietly. “Did I take too much?”

“Yes to both. Just give me a minute. Go and shower.”

“I’m sorry,” he says again and takes my hand.

I shrug.

“Thank you, Aefre, for coming back for me. I didn’t think you would, and I told myself that even if you did, I would make you go away again. I don’t want to make you go away. Please don’t go away from me ever again.”

“I won’t. I needed this time to process everything that happened. And not just what happened between us, but everything else.”

“Have you healed?” he asks quietly. “I wanted so desperately to help you heal, but I know it wasn’t what was best for you.”

“Yes, I am healed. Mostly. Go and shower now and we can get going,” I say.

He nods. “Will you join me?”

I gulp and shake my head. “I need a bit longer. You go.”

He leans over to kiss me and I let him before he disappears back to our bedroom. I breathe in deeply and then regret it. It really does stink in here. I can’t believe that he holed himself up in here and punished himself for three months. Although, I have to admit that a small part of me is pleased. Pleased that he didn’t just go on with his life, as if this time apart meant nothing to him. It shows me he is sorry and feels guilty about what he did. I
get my strength back and sit up. My head spins briefly, but then it is clear again. I head downstairs to find Marguerite and when I find her in the kitchen, I tell her that he is up and fed, but needs a human Feeder immediately and to send one up for me too. I also tell her to go and fix that mess of a bedroom and she bobs her head and rushes to do my bidding.

“You came back,” Nico says, hovering in the doorway

“Of course, I did. I love him,” I say. “You doubted me?”

“I feared for him that you would not return. He hasn’t left that room since he got back here three months ago,” he says carefully.

“I know, but he is up now and coming home with me,” I say softly.

“Good,” he says and turns to leave. “I’ll join you in a couple of days.”

I follow him out and go back upstairs to find CK. He has just got out of the shower as I walk into the bedroom and he is all clean-shaven and fresh again. I smile at him, taking in his damp hair and body, a towel slung low over his hips. He smiles back at me and takes me in his arms. “I love you,” he says. “I need you.”