Read Beneath The Texas Sky Online
Authors: Jodi Thomas
Bethanie didn’t move or speak. She was afraid of what he was going to say. She wanted to sleep and not think about all that had happened between them. Or of how it might end.
“I need to say this, whether you listen or not,” Josh stated with determination. “Since I first saw you at the hotel, I’ve been attracted to you. I can see your movements in my mind’s eye as clearly as if they were before me in bright daylight. But it’s not just your body I’m mesmerized by.” His unexpected laughter filled the tiny space. “Though I must admit it holds a few beautiful surprises. But, I’m attracted to you…your high, strong spirit, and the fight I see in your eyes. I’ve watched you face danger with bravery, and hardship with uncomplaining strength. Yet I’ve seen you be kind and patient with Dusty and defiant with Martha.” He was silent for a long moment, then added, “You’re a fascinating woman.”
Josh paused and Bethanie felt tears flood her eyes. He continued complimenting her in his warm voice, caressing her with his words. She turned silently toward him in the total darkness.
Josh’s tone was low as he hesitated slightly. “Bethanie…I guess what I’m trying to say is, I’m in love with you.” He laughed nervously. “I can’t explain it; but one thing I swear, I’ve never loved anyone in my life before. I always thought when it happened there’d be a
time when I wasn’t sure, when I’d have to think about how I felt. But, Bethanie, what I feel for you is fact, and time eternal will never alter it.”
Bethanie reached toward him in the darkness. An instant after she touched his shoulder, he was pulling her to him. He encircled her in his strong arms as if fearing he might lose her. His hold was so tight, Bethanie could barely breathe. She ran her fingers into his thick hair and drew his face close to her.
“Josh,” she whispered as his lips covered her mouth. There was no need to talk, for they both felt the other’s tender emotions as they molded together. “Josh, I feel the same as you, but I’m afraid.”
“Afraid of me?” Josh whispered.
“No, afraid you will turn away from me.” Bethanie’s voice was soft, her words blending with the splattering outside.
“Never,” he laughed. “Never…” His words trailed away as his mouth once again found her lips. As his kiss deepened, Josh gently began to move his hands over her damp clothes. He trembled slightly as his fingers slid into her shirt, touching the warm softness of her flesh. He pulled an inch away and whispered into her hair. “I’ve tried all day to push the feel of you from my mind. To forget the sweet taste of your lips and body. I’ve raged war with my feelings and almost lost my sanity. I think I’m addicted to you.”
Bethanie tingled with a warmth flushing her skin and burning her cheeks. Josh was so sure he’d never turn away from her, how could she doubt his word? The fire from her cheeks spread through her limbs and centered on each spot Josh touched. She found him even more exciting under cover of night. Without sight, her other senses sharpened to aid her. Timidly, she placed her hands on his chest and struggled with his shirt buttons. As his shirt opened to her efforts, she pressed her fingers
over his muscular chest. Her hands drifted over his shoulders and touched his injured arm.
Josh tightened in pain and Bethanie stopped. “Did I hurt you?” she whispered.
“No,” Josh laughed. “Your touch could never bring me anything but pleasure.”
Timidly she began to move her fingers over his flesh, carefully avoiding his bandaged arm. Bethanie was so fascinated with her exploration, she hardly noticed Josh was skillfully unbuttoning her shirt and pants. His palm slid unhampered from her shoulder to her flat stomach. He laughed with joy as his hands moved up and down her body. Each stroke of his fingers descended deeper into her denims, until he reached the curly hair covering her womanhood.
As Josh moved his fingers over her abdomen and lower, Bethanie let out a low moan and rolled to her back, allowing him more freedom to explore. He moved above her, pulling her clothes free from her hips. Slowly, lovingly, he began to show her of his love, touching her as softly as snow one moment, then pulling her so near the next second that she could hardly breathe. He’d move above her as his fingers caressed each curve of her flesh and his mouth lovingly tasted each hollow and mound. She moved her head from side to side in sheer pleasure as rapture flooded her brain. He stroked and tugged at her nipples until they were pointed and begging for more attention. Bethanie couldn’t have directed him, but she responded with new joy to each touch. His breathing grew more rapid, yet his touch was unhurried, almost lazy as he explored. His fingers would slide over her most private parts, then brush away, only to return with slightly more pressure the next time.
Josh shifted to his side and lay close to her as his hand played with the inside of her thigh. “You don’t talk much for a woman,” he whispered, playfully kissing her ear.
“But your body tells me a great deal.” As he spoke he moved his fingers between her legs to the warm mound covered with hair.
Bethanie moved to his rhythm. She wasn’t afraid or ashamed. To her surprise, she knew all that was happening was right for her. In a few hours they would be at his brother’s ranch, and she had no idea which way her life would turn, but she’d have tonight. Her first taste of love would not be rape from a drunken uncle, but the gentle paradise of Josh’s arms.
Josh moved his hand up suddenly to cup her breast. His words reflected his pain, as if he were being tortured. “Why don’t you stop me, Bethanie?”
“Do you want me to stop you?” Bethanie whispered in confusion. How could he touch her so lovingly and want her to stop him?
His voice was low, the words tearing from him. “I’ll not take a virgin. I must not. You don’t belong to me.” He removed his hand. “I love you, and the feel of you is opium to my brain, but I will not.”
Bethanie heard the sadness in his words and the cold pain of his withdrawal from her side. He was an honorable man and wouldn’t go against the set of rules that forged his behavior. The air seemed suffocatingly thick as they lay in total darkness, listening to each other breathe.
Bethanie raised to one elbow. “Do you want me, Joshua?” she asked in her brief, frank way.
“More than anything,” Josh answered. “But…”
Before he could finish, Bethanie rolled the inches between them. Her breasts pressed against his bare chest. “There is no more to be said. I am yours,” she whispered, knowing she meant for a lifetime, and not just for a night.
Josh groaned in a blending of pain and pleasure as he pulled her closer. “I can’t fight myself and you, too. Be mine, then, Bethanie, for tonight and forever.”
Bethanie pushed her fears of the future aside and gave herself totally to this man. He had spoken her very thoughts, and she knew they were meant for each other. Tomorrow would be time enough to talk of her past. Tomorrow.
Gray dawn filtered into the cave in varying hues of smoky light. Tiny specks of dust danced in the humid sunbeams, forming a lacy, transparent curtain across the opening. Bethanie stretched, allowing her mind to drift back to the night hours. Josh had made love to her with a passion and caring unlike anything she imagined could exist on this earth. In the vibrating peaks and quiet, holding valleys, she found a world of fathomless wonder, a place of belonging she’d never known before. When he had finally moved inside her, Bethanie knew she’d love this man all her life. They became one in spirit as well as in flesh. Afterward, in the lethargic motions of returning to earth, he’d held her close and they’d listened to the music of the rain outside.
As Bethanie pulled the blanket from around her face, she realized Josh’s warmth was no longer beside her. Panic filled her, disturbing her tranquility with lightning force. Could he have left and encountered trouble? She scrambled into her scattered clothes. The borrowed cotton shirt fought briefly with her frantic fingers. Thoughts of Josh being attacked by stalking Indians or wild animals filled her mind as she pulled her pants over her hips. What if he’d heard some noise and left to investigate without waking her? Worse, Bethanie thought with fearful pride, what if he’d just left her as her father had,
without any good-bye? With no thought of caution, Bethanie darted from the cave.
The rocks formed wet, slippery walls on either side of her as she maneuvered down the stone trail in the direction where they’d tied the horses. The morning was blindingly white. A lone vulture circled a quarter mile to her left, crossing the sun with each trip. As she rounded the curve where the animals had been tethered, she slipped and tumbled into the opening.
Pulling her tangled hair from her eyes, Bethanie saw Josh standing between the horses. His laughter rattled the crystal-clear morning and danced across the stony earth, newly washed with rain. He hurried toward her, smiling. His hat was propped back, allowing the sun to touch his face.
“Morning.” Josh’s eyes warmed to a hickory brown as his gaze traveled over her possessively. “A man could get drunk with one look at you, woman. But we need to work on your entrances.” He dropped the reins, forgetting his task completely. “Come here,” he whispered, pulling her to her feet. “Let me see if you broke any bones in that tumble.”
Bethanie laughed with excitement and relief. “I’m fine, really.” She was foolish to think Josh would leave her. Last night they had shared dreams and plans enough to last a lifetime.
Josh kissed her nose as his hand moved tenderly down her back. “You look great in the morning.” His eyes turned a smoky brown. “But you felt magnificent in the darkness of the cave.” His voice grew husky with remembrance. “I was blinded more from the want of you than the night. I only regret I couldn’t see you.” He pushed her hair back from her eyes. “What about you? Any regrets?”
Bethanie shook her head. She was unable to express how last night had been the most wonderful night of her
life. Even now, as she stood looking up into his laughing dark eyes, she warmed to the memory of his touch.
Josh broke into her thoughts. “I’ll have to get used to a quiet woman.” He kissed her once more, then pulled her toward the horses. “I can’t wait for you to see the ranch. My brother Ben and I started it before the war and he ran it while I was away. I’ve never thought of settling down…until lately.” He winked as he said the last words.
Josh continued to talk about the ranch and his brother while they ate the last few strips of jerky. “Ben couldn’t fight.” His tone grew sad. “I guess I’d better tell you before we reach the ranch. He had an accident when he was seventeen, the spring before Dad died. Ben walked in on a bank robbery. He jumped on his horse to go after one of the robbers. A stray shot hit his horse and Ben took a bad fall. Dad never allowed Ben to feel sorry for himself or any of us to pamper him. He made Ben do everything alone from the first.” Josh swung into the saddle and pulled his hat tight. “You’ll understand when you meet him later today. We’d better ride. We’re getting a late start.”
Bethanie climbed into the saddle. “I’m sorry, I overslept.”
“You didn’t get much rest last night,” Josh laughed. He looked younger and happier than he had yesterday. The bruise over his cheek showed as a reminder of the Indian fight, but the light of his eyes spoke of last night’s loving.
Josh turned to glance in the direction of the cave. “I hate to leave this place. I’ll never forget it.” He reached to touch Bethanie’s hand. “I don’t want to hurry you, but I love you and plan on spending years telling you so.”
Bethanie’s cheeks reddened. In a few hours her life had taken a wide turn. As she rode beside Josh, she
thought how bright her future looked. It was like a fairy tale almost too wonderful to be true.
Josh led Bethanie across open country at a pace meant only for the sturdy. They saw no other humans, only occasional burned dugouts which loomed as ghostly reminders of battles fought and lost. “We’re riding the border of the frontier now, the edge of civilization,” Josh said more to himself than to her. He seemed to need the reassurance of conversation as they neared the charred hulls of homes.
“Before the war, my uncle’s family settled here. He had been with Sam Houston at San Jacinto when Santa Anna was captured. After Texas gained independence, my aunt and uncle were one of the many families who pushed ranching into this Indian country.” He seemed unable to tear his eyes from one skeleton of a home. Bethanie didn’t have to ask what had happened in this spot years ago.
“Did anyone survive?” She moved closer to him, wishing she could reach out and hold him.
Josh shook his head. “They were the last of my kin, except for Ben. In the early days a scant line of Federal forts offered them some protection. But with Texas’s secession the Federal troops were pulled out, and the ranches shrank back like withered hands of an old man. We tried to combat the Indians on our own, as Governor Lubbock helped organize the Texas Rangers. We had some success, but the land was too vast for a tiny army of volunteers to cover.”
Josh found talking as comfortable as Bethanie found silence. “Economically, Texas suffered less than any other Confederate state due to the war. Yet, last year when it ended, folks estimated cattle outnumbered people six to one. Our ranch lies northeast of San Antonio along
this frontier edge. But we’ve taken care not to be caught off guard. Ben swears what happened to my uncle’s family will never happen to the Weston Ranch. You should be safe once we reach there.”
Bethanie smiled. “I’ll be with you.”
Josh winked, the sadness leaving his face. “You bet. Between the two of us, we’re an unbeatable team.” He kicked his horse into a swift pace, and Bethanie joined him.
The sun marked late afternoon as the two weary travelers climbed a ridge and caught sight of the Weston Ranch. Bethanie was shocked at the size of the main house. In a country where most ranches were little more than two room dugouts, this large one-story home looked enormous. The main buildings were nestled beneath a jagged rock formation protecting them from the north wind. Nature’s high stone wall also provided a natural defense on three sides from Indian attack. This was why Josh was so sure the Weston Ranch was safe. About fifty feet from the main house stood the bunkhouse designed with a long porch running its length. A corral and large barn lay just to the left of the bunkhouse. Ancient cottonwood trees backed the buildings as if hugging them close in the protective nest of the cliffs above.