Belonging (9 page)

There was a hint of wistfulness in the soft
lines of her face, a silent wish for what might have been. But her
eyes were dark with sorrow. Life had been so full then, so
promising. She had had everything in the world to look forward to.
Her career, her future with the man she loved, the joys of
motherhood. She felt a dull, familiar ache. How had it all gotten
so... so twisted?

"Angie?"

With a start she realized Matt was speaking
to her, and she snapped back to the present. "Yes?"

He smiled crookedly, and she noticed he had
pulled over to the curb. "I lost Bill at that last turn. Where do
we go from here?"

Angie forced a laugh. "You'd better be
careful, Chief. We can't let it be known that the chief of police
hasn't mastered the city's geography yet."

His eyes crinkled at the corners. For an
instant, just for an instant, Angie let herself appreciate the
genuine warmth she saw reflected there. "Offering to help me with
my homework?" he asked. His smile widened when she shook her head
and hastily averted her eyes. Matt made her feel nervous--damn
nervous.

"Never mind," she muttered. "I'm sure it'll
come in time."

In time. It would indeed, Matt thought as he
listened to her voice guide him the rest of the way to the
ballpark. He hadn't missed the half-wistful, half-sad expression on
her face the moment before. In time he would know all of her, all
that had shaped her into the complex woman she was. The resolution,
as well as the strength of the conviction with which he made it,
surprised him. Was it because he needed a friend?

He did want Angie Hall as a friend. But he
also wanted more from her. He was aware that it wasn't just desire
for an attractive woman that beckoned him. Why, Matt couldn't have
said. He knew only that he felt it very strongly, and he was a man
used to trusting his own feelings, his instincts. So many times
they were all he had to rely on.

Most of the youngsters had already assembled
at the park when they arrived. With Kim and Nancy in tow, Angie and
Janice headed toward the rest of the team.

There was a small set of bleachers behind the
first and third baselines, and it was there that Bill and Matt
directed their steps. Bill carried the baby, and Matt was a little
surprised when Casey skipped readily along beside him.

"Wait till you see these girls play," Bill
said with a grin. "Funniest thing you've ever seen in your life.
Nancy plays because Kim does, and those two are thicker than
thieves. But Kim... well, Kim's pretty good."

Matt's eyes squinted thoughtfully against the
bright glare of the afternoon sun, watching the pigtailed,
ponytailed crew take their positions on the field. He'd been a
baseball fan for as long as he could remember, and as always he
found it hard not to get involved in the game. He bounded to his
feet more than once, startling Casey the first time, but then she
giggled when he shot a sheepish grin down at her. He groaned, he
cheered, but as the game wore on, he discovered Bill was right. He
found it harder and harder to contain his laughter.

In the batter's box one young girl
continually swung her bat after the softball had been caught snugly
in the catcher's mitt and tossed back to the pitcher's mound.
Another chased a base hit halfway around the outfield before she
finally scooped it up in her hands, only to drop it at least three
times before she sent a determined lob that landed no more than
three feet away.

Bill was also right about Kim. She hit a
double and a home run, and made several good fielding plays at
second base. As young as she was, she handled both ball and bat
with a deftness that surprised Matt. After the game he went up to
her.

"Good game, Kim," he congratulated her.
Tilting his head, he peered at the number emblazoned on the
royal-blue jersey. "Fourteen, huh? Just like Ernie Banks."

He'd been about to lay a hand on her
shoulder, but the sudden stiffness in her small body stopped him.
He smiled encouragingly instead. "Do you know who Ernie Banks
is?"

She shook her head. The movement was barely
perceptible.

"He played for the Chicago Cubs when I was,
oh, not much older than you." He stopped, hoping she would say
something. Instead, she just stared up at him, her hands still
clutching her baseball glove. Something about her reticence
reminded him of Angie, but at least she hadn't shied away from him
as she had with another father who came up and clapped her on the
shoulder.

"He was quite a home-run hitter, Ernie was."
His smile widened. "Just like you."

A spark blazed in the wide brown eyes that
stared up at him before a hint of wariness replaced it. "I better
go back to my mom," she hedged, then ran off to where Angie was
still surrounded by parents and children.

Angie had watched the incident from a
distance. Kim looking a man straight in the eye was rare; in fact,
she couldn't remember the last time it had happened. Usually she
hung her head shyly. It surprised her that the child hadn't flown
away like a trapped bird that had been set free. She was pleased at
Kim's response, small though it was, yet it vaguely disturbed her
that it had happened with Matt Richardson.

It wasn't like her to be so petty, and it
occurred to her that she was trying very hard not to like Matt. She
wasn't, she decided, being fair. She owed him a chance, that much
at least. Just don't let him get too close.

"So what'd you think of our game?" Janice's
cheerful voice came to her ears. Angie saw that Matt had walked up
beside her, and it was him that Janice addressed. Most of the other
parents and children had dispersed to their cars. The dusty field
was almost deserted.

Matt raised his eyebrows, as if considering.
"It was quite an experience," he finally told her smoothly. "One
I'm sure I won't soon forget."

"A guy with tact!" Janice exclaimed. "All I
ever hear from Bill is that the two of us should have been
cheerleaders instead of coaches." She nudged Angie playfully.
"Where'd you ever find this guy?"

It was on the tip of her tongue to retort
that she hadn't found him at all; rather, it was the other way
around. Only the glimmer of amusement in Matt's eyes stopped her.
It irritated her that Janice seemed so intent on pairing her with
Matt.

And Matt certainly wasn't helping matters
any, she reiterated darkly an hour later. It had been his
suggestion that all of them go for pizza afterward, and Janice
and Bill had enthusiastically agreed.

The parlor, decorated in a Gay Nineties
motif, was alive with the sounds of laughter and music from a
player piano in the corner. Matt seemed perfectly at home with her
friends, and both Janice and Bill were all ears as he talked about
his days on the Chicago police force.

"What's the best excuse anyone ever gave you
for speeding?" Bill asked.

Matt thought for a moment, then smiled. "A
woman once told me she was in a hurry to get home so the ice cream
she'd just bought wouldn't melt."

"Sounds good to me." Janice's eyes gleamed.
"Did it work?"

A bushy eyebrow lifted. "Are you kidding? It
was January, and the temperature had to be at least fifteen degrees
below zero!"

Janice looked so forlorn that Angie hid a
smile in her napkin. Ice cream was one of Janice's weaknesses. She
was one of those people who perpetually claim to be on a diet, but
late-night trips to the freezer were probably the main reason that
she never lost the ten pounds she'd gained over the past few
years.

To her amazement, Angie discovered that she
enjoyed listening to Matt as he recounted several more humorous
tales. But she was wise enough to realize that there were two sides
to every coin. A man in his line of work would also be exposed to
the seamier side of life, undoubtedly on a daily basis in a city as
large as Chicago. The stress, the pressures, were nothing to scoff
at, and she found herself thinking of him with new respect. She
also wondered what was behind the decision to turn his back on his
home and his career. Seventeen years of job security was not
something to be taken lightly.

In fact, Angie could have relaxed completely
if it hadn't been for the man sitting next to her. They'd had to
crowd the chairs around the table to accommodate all of them, and
again she found herself next to him. Wedged tightly between him and
the girls, she couldn't ignore the slight pressure of his knee
riding gently against her own. The contact was casual but
unavoidable.

Angie breathed a sigh of relief when everyone
rose to leave a short time later. Janice looked up at her as she
bundled the baby into a sweater. "You sure you don't want a ride
home with us, Angie?"

Her tone was bland, a little too innocent,
but before Angie had a chance to open her mouth, Matt offered,
"I'll take her and the girls home. It would be too crowded in your
car." He patted his stomach and grinned. "Especially after that
pizza."

It was all she could do not to strangle both
Matt and Janice. Angie loved her friend dearly, but she could live
without the matchmaking efforts. If she hadn't known for certain
that the two of them hadn't met before today, she'd have suspected
a little conspiracy between them.

"I hate to make you go out of your way," she
told him.

"It's really no bother." Matt's tone was as
warm as hers was cool. He opened the restaurant door for her.

Angie brushed by him, flanked by her two
small daughters. Her slender shoulders were held proudly.

The sky had darkened to a bluish-purple haze
that heralded the coming of night. The sun was a vivid ball of
orange as it prepared to plunge beneath the horizon.

Matt's eyes lingered on the western sky as he
pulled the car door shut behind him. He sat for a moment, one hand
draped carelessly over the steering wheel, absorbed by the sight.
"You don't see sunsets like that at home," he remarked quietly.

In spite of herself Angie softened. "Home?"
she echoed. "Is this your way of telling me you're resigning after
all and going back to Chicago?" she asked teasingly.

Not a chance, Matt thought fervently. He
shrugged, his expression rather sheepish. "Habit, I guess." There
was a thoughtful pause. "It's hard to think of Westridge as home
yet," he admitted. Starting the car, he pulled onto the street.

A few minutes later he pointed out a white
frame house as his. Even through the darkness she could see that it
was large, the fenced yard neatly cropped. "Looks like a big house
for only one person," she commented. A half smile touched her lips
as she remembered what he'd told her only that afternoon. "I had
you pegged as a cliff dweller."

Matt grinned. "I asked for that, didn't I?"
It occurred to him that they both seemed to harbor a few
misconceptions about each other. But at least she wasn't without a
sense of humor. He liked that. In fact, he was finding that there
wasn't much about Angie that he didn't like.

They had pulled into her driveway by now.
Matt cut the engine, then turned to Angie.

There was an intent look on his face that
sent a prickly feeling up her spine. Angie glanced over her
shoulder at Kim and Casey, huddled together in the back seat. Both
were sound asleep.

"I'd better get the girls inside," she said
quickly, fumbling for the door handle. "They've had a long
day."

"Here, let me take Casey." A strong pair of
arms reached in and lifted the child before Angie had even climbed
out of the car. She woke Kim, then dug in her purse for her house
key while Matt stood patiently on the porch.

Inside, she escorted a sleepy Kim up the
stairs while Matt trailed along behind her. She couldn't suppress a
faint twinge of annoyance at how Casey's small blond head nestled
cozily against his broad shoulder before his gentle hands lowered
the still-slumbering child to the double bed. Angie shooed Kim off
to the bathroom with her toothbrush and nightgown.

Matt stepped into the hallway and tactfully
closed the door. Angie heard his footsteps treading the stairs
while she pulled Casey's shirt over her head. She roused slightly
but was fast asleep once more by the time Angie tucked the blankets
around her two daughters.

Matt rose from the chair he'd been sitting on
when she entered the living room. "You're still here." She tried to
sound surprised, hoping he would pick up on her cue. The presence
of a man in her house was something she wasn't used to.

He smiled. "You won't get rid of me that
easily."

A vaguely unsettling feeling came over her.
Angie wasn't sure she wanted to put an interpretation on that
statement. "I'm finding that out, aren't I?" she said smoothly.

"You're not still angry about this afternoon,
are you?"

A slender brow arched. "Now why should I be
angry?" A slight edge crept into her voice. "Just because
you—"

"Horned in on your day."

Angie's mouth closed, and she studied him
openly. He was smiling, his eyes reflected only amusement, yet she
sensed he was perfectly serious. "Well," she said grudgingly,
"Janice did invite you." And hadn't there been a few times during
the day when she hadn't really minded his being along? Though not,
she reminded herself, when he was making her nervous—as he was
right now.

"No," she said finally and realized she meant
it. "I'm not angry."

"But you'd rather I stayed the hell out of
your territory."

Her eyes narrowed at his mild tone. What was
he after? "You're very blunt," she said slowly.

"I like to know where I stand, Angie." A
small silence spun out between them. Matt didn't pretend to be a
mind reader, though he had learned to read a great deal into a
person's expression. But Angie... She didn't flinch from eye
contact, and she betrayed little of her thoughts. She was tense,
however; Matt could see it in the slight stiffening of her
shoulders.