Behind the Tears (Behind the Lives) (6 page)

She gasped as Dante’s fingers touched her below, one entering as he continued to suckle on her breast. She opened her eyes and looked down at his wavy hair, like she was looking at Ash. Dante let go of her breast and lifted her, propping her at the edge of the table. He grabbed her head with one hand and kissed her hard, his tongue delving inside her mouth. Something clunked on the lino. Breaking their kiss, he lowered her onto the cold surface of the table and lifted one of her legs. The touch of his cock at her entrance startled her, making her lift her head. He paused for a moment, staring at her intensely, then slowly entered her, not taking his eyes off her face. Wanting it faster, she pushed her pelvis at him, impaling herself further, the sudden movement causing her pain, but she groaned into it, loving the feeling.

He lifted her legs over his shoulders and started to piston in and out. Her hands reached for him, needing him closer. He leaned down and brushed his lips against hers, then stopped his thrusting completely as his mouth wandered down to her breast again. She grabbed his head and arched upwards, keening as he suckled her, his tongue, mouth and teeth working overtime, driving so much need down her body that she was desperate for release.

He bit her nipple, making her scream, a mixture of pain and pleasure thrashing through her. He let go of her breast and started pumping her hard, shunting the table back and forth, and taking her over the edge in more ways than one. With her head hanging over the table, she cried out, “I love you!” her body finally getting the release she needed.

He went rigid, then pulled out so suddenly it startled her. Still feeling the afterglow of the orgasm, she lay on her back in a daze, watching him as he stared at the wall behind her. He muttered something in a language she didn’t understand, then raised his hands to his head, his expression pained.

Concerned he’d hurt himself, she pushed up. “What’s wrong?” she said, reaching for him.

“Don’t touch me!” He stepped back and fell over the chair, then tugged up his pants and took off down the passage.

Beth went to follow, but stopped, her gaze moving to the picture he’d been staring at. Within the metal frame, a teenage Ash held a pre-teen Dante in a headlock, the smiles on their faces showing they were having fun—a loving relationship between brothers.

The full realisation of what she’d done finally hit Beth.

5

Dante

Beth banged on his bedroom door, pleading with him to let her in.

“Oprosti mi!”
Dante shouted the Croatian words he used for apologising
,
something he said when he’d done something so bad that English was inadequate. And he was always sorry for something, because he found it hard to control himself, constantly doing whatever he wanted whether it hurt people or not. He saw, he took, and damn the consequences. But this time he’d gone too far, Ash’s woman not someone he should’ve touched, no matter how much he wanted to.

“Please don’t tell Ash!” Beth shouted.

As if he would. He didn’t want to hurt his brother, plus he couldn’t handle it if Ash stopped talking to him. He didn’t mind taking a beating—he deserved it, but Ash was the type to totally cut people off if they betrayed him. That scared him more than anything, because he needed Ash in his life.

“Dante, I-I...”

Love me?
Did she mean what she’d said earlier? It wasn’t something he thought was possible, yet he’d never thought she’d respond to his touch either. But now, after hearing her words...

“I didn’t mean for this to happen,” Beth said, snapping him out of his thoughts. “It wuz a mistake.”

He went still for a second, then grabbed a model car off the bedside table and threw it at the door, rage taking over. “I already know I’m a big fuckin’ mistake, so fuck off!” He flopped back onto his bed, pissed off for being so gullible, and believing for a second that she actually loved him. No female really wanted him, their words of love never leading to anything. They only came over for sex, because that was all he was good for. He was just something to brag about to their mates; a naked picture on a phone to laugh at or a dirty li’l secret to hide from their husband or boyfriend.

“I didn’t say you were a mistake,” Beth said.

“Yes, you did.”

“Just unlock the door, so we can sort this out.”

“It’s sorted: you love Ash, no one loves me.”

“Stop it, Dante, please lemme in.”

“Why? So you can fuck me over again.”

“Don’t be like this.”

He lifted his right arm, focusing on the faded number scrawled across his flesh. The female who’d put it there last night wanted to screw him too. She’d been all over him, even shoving her mate out of the way when the other chick tried to make a move. And she’d had a smoking hot bod that he wanted to pump so hard she snapped, but he’d decided not to go with her, because he was sick of being told after he’d done the deed they had someone else. Yeah, he’d noticed the pale line on her wedding finger. That wouldn’t have bothered him when he was a teenager, he just did any hot chick he could, but now... he wanted more, wanted an actual relationship, someone who loved him. He knew it was pathetic—God, how Beth was right, but he couldn’t do the one-night stands anymore, because... Fuck! He was turning into a sap, and a whiny bitch at that.

“Dante, I’m sorry,” Beth called out. “I lost control, but Ash doesn’t needa know ’bout this. It’s not like you love me or anything.”

“I already told ja I won’t tell him.”
And I do love you.
Bloody classic that he fell for his brother’s woman, a real walking cliché. The banging on the door continued. He needed a distraction, something to take his mind of her. He reached for the leather jacket hanging off the desk chair and pulled out his phone, scrolling down his contacts to look for Tiana’s number. Unlike Beth, Ash’s ex never talked to him like he was worthless. Oh, she would tell him off at times, but it wasn’t demeaning. Instead, it was more like a sister scolding a brother, just in a respectful manner. And he did love her like a sister. He missed living with her, and missed his nephew even more, the house not the same without the li’l fella.

He hit the number, hoping Tiana was home. After a few seconds a female voice answered, “Dante?”

“Yup.”

“How’s it goin’?”

“Not too good.”

“Why, what’s wrong? Is Ash alright?”

Dante smiled sadly. No matter what Ash said, there was no doubt in his mind that Tiana still loved his brother. If anything, he thought those two were idiots for not sorting their shit out, because if he was ever lucky enough to find love like that, he would fight for it with all he had.
Mutual love
, that is. He looked over at the door as Beth continued to knock, wishing she loved him.

“Dante?” Tiana said, her voice sounding even more concerned. “You there?”

“Yeah, sorry. Ash is just upset. Chaz’s hearing went badly.”

“Oh, God, did that creature get parole?”

“I dunno, I lost my rag and had to leave.”

“Oh, Dante, I’m sorry. Did Ash go?”

“No.”

“Good, he shouldn’t hafta see that horrible creature ever again. And what’s that banging?”

Dante glanced at the door as Beth called out again. Jesus, that woman never gave in. “Ash’s girlfriend is mad at me.”

Tiana exhaled loudly.

“Sorry,” he said. “I shouldn’t have mentioned her. And Ash is only with her cos you left him.”

“I didn’t have a choice.”

“Don’t gimme that bull,” Dante said, suddenly angry at her excuse. “You did have a choice, and you broke him when you walked out with his son.”

Tiana stifled a sob, then the phone went silent.

Dante swore under his breath. Why couldn’t he fucking control himself? He could go from being perfectly polite to biting someone’s head off in a second. He didn’t mean to, shit just flew out of his mouth before he could think.

“I’m sorry, T,” he said. “I shouldn’t have said that. I’m just really strung out.”

She sniffled. “I can’t talk right now.”

“No, no, please don’t hang up on me; I didn’t ring to upset you.”

“I know.”

“So, you’ll forgive me?”

“Nuthin’ to forgive when it’s the truth.”

“Oh, sweetness, don’t cry,” Dante said, feeling like utter dog turd.

She breathed out, the sound shaky. “Don’t worry ’bout it.”

“I s’pose you won’t want me coming over now?”

“You wanna come over?”

“Yeah, I’d love to see Angelo. I bought him those rugby cards he likes,” Dante said, the last part a lie, although he fully intended on picking them up on the way.

She went silent again.

“Please, T, I really needa get outta the house, Beth is driving me insane.”

“Okay, you can come over,” she answered way too fast, his mention of Beth no doubt the motivating factor.

Relieved, Dante stood up. “Cheers, I’ll see ya in thirty minutes, and tell Angelo his Uncle Dumbte’s coming.”

Tiana laughed softly, the sound making Dante feel a bit better. “You shouldn’t encourage him,” she said. “He’s not three anymore, he can say your name properly now.”

“But I think it’s adorable.”

“Yeah, it is,
Dante
,” she accentuated his name.

“Okay,
Tiana,
see ya soon.” Smiling, he pocketed the phone, then grabbed his leather jacket and headed for the door, hoping that the silence meant Beth had left. He opened it, and looked down. Beth was sitting on the floor, wearing her colourful kimono. Her face was flushed, and she looked like she’d been crying.

She scrambled to her feet. “Are ya gonna tell Ash?”

“How many times do I hafta tell ya I won’t? Why the hell would I wanna hurt him? I feel like scum as it is.”

She raised a hand to her forehead. “I’m sorry too; I didn’t mean for things to happen.”

His gaze lowered to her breasts as the kimono parted from the movement. He closed his eyes. “It’s not your fault, it’s mine. I shouldn’t have touched you.”

“Dante ...” Her hand brushed his arm.

Jesus, he couldn’t do this. Opening his eyes, he moved her aside, and strode through the passage. He didn’t want to be near her—to be tempted. He pulled out his phone and scrolled down to find the number of a taxi.

Footsteps followed him. “Dante, where are ya goin’?”

He opened the front door, and reeled off his address to the lady on the other end of the line, then hung up.

“Can’t we talk some more?” Beth grabbed his arm.

Dante pulled free. “There’s nuthin’ to talk about. I already said I’d keep my mouth shut. What more do ya want from me?”

“I wanted to know how you ... feel.” She looked almost hopeful, like she really cared. His gaze followed her hand as she brushed her long, straight black hair away from her beauti— Shit, he had to stop looking at her like that.

“What do you care how I feel?” he said. “You made it doubly clear that you don’t give a shit ’bout me. And you’re forgetting that I’m just a slut.”

“I didn’t mean that—”

“But you’re still treating me like one. Maybe you should stuff some cash down my pants, cos all I am to you is a fuckin’ whore, your dirty li’l secret.”

She looked like he’d slapped her. “That’s a horrid thing to say.”

But it’s true.
Dante glanced at the road, hoping the taxi would turn up quick. Beth continued talking. He blocked her out, not interested in her panicked babbling. After a few minutes, the taxi finally arrived. He jumped down the steps and headed for it.

“Dante, please!”

He ignored her. There was nothing he could say that would make things right, but there was one thing he could do, and that was to never touch her again—no matter how much he wanted to.

***

After stopping off to buy a bundle of cards for Angelo,
Dante glanced back at Sylvia Park shopping centre from the backseat of the taxi. A Hoyts cinema, the yellow PAK’nSAVE supermarket and numerous other shops made up the largest mall in New Zealand, along with a massive car park lining the front.

Lower to middle class houses flashed by as the taxi headed along Mt. Wellington highway, the neighbourhood a step up from his. The music on the radio came to an end, soon followed by the twelve o’clock news: “
There has been a prison riot at...”

The mention of Chaz’s prison caught Dante’s attention. “Turn it up.”

The taxi driver did as instructed.

“Two deaths have been confirmed, while four other prisoners have been admitted to Middleton hospital, one critically injured. Police and hospital staff have assured the public that the prisoners are being heavily guarded and are not a threat to public safety. The riot was believed to have started after an eighteen-year-old male attacked a fellow inmate. The youth is amongst the dead.”
The reporter cut to another story.

“You can turn it down now,” Dante said, wondering whether Chaz had been injured—or killed. He pulled out his phone, checking if he had any texts or calls relating to it. Instead, numerous messages from Beth cluttered his in-box. Dante deleted them, then re-pocketed the phone as the taxi turned onto Tiana’s street. He pointed to her house. “Number 8 with the large trees out front.”