Behind Her Smile (5 page)

“This is Madison Baron. She came to see me today to request your class,” he replied.

Mr. Barnes extended his hand to her. “Nice to meet you, Madison.”

“You, too,” she said, shaking his hand. “Luke Johnson told me you’re a great teacher.”

He smiled. “Luke’s going to be missed around here.”

Madison nodded in agreement.

“We’re looking at putting Madison into your fifth period,” Mr. Woodruff said. “I know that’s your largest class but according to the computer, you have one opening left.”

“Okay,” he replied. “Sounds like you’re in, Madison.”

“Thanks,” she replied. “I’m looking forward to it.”

Mr. Barnes smiled. “I hope your enthusiasm is contagious, young lady. You may be aware that many students aren’t too fond of history.”

“Luke said you make it really interesting,” she replied.

“Well, you tell Luke I appreciate his endorsement,” he said.

“We’d better let Mr. Barnes get back to his work,” Mr. Woodruff commented to Madison. “Let’s go back to my office and get your new schedule printed out.”

That night as they sat around the dinner table, Madison’s father brought up her appointment with Mr. Woodruff. “So I heard you went to see the school counselor today, and he changed your schedule for you.”

“Yeah. Sort of. He changed my history teacher, but I’m still stuck with first period PE,” she replied.

“Seems like you are into running in the mornings these days,” he said. “Maybe that will turn out to be a good fit.”

“Yeah,” Caleb piped up. “You could just run in your PE clothes and then go straight to school.”

Madison nodded. “I guess.”

“Want a potato, honey?” her mother asked. “You don’t have much on that plate of yours.”

“No thanks. I’m good.” Madison kept her eye on her plate, but she could feel both of her parents studying her. Trying to change the subject, she turned to Caleb. “How was your double-decker fudge brownie cone?”

“Delish! You missed out,” he replied. “When’s your stupid diet going to be over?”

She glared at him.

“Diet? You don’t need to be on a diet, Madison,” her father said. “You look great just the way you are.”

“Your father’s right, honey,” her mother added.

“She thinks she’s fat,” Caleb replied.

“I do not!” Madison pushed her chair away from the table and stormed out of the kitchen.

Her mother was on her heels as Madison headed for the stairs. “Wait, Maddie. Can we talk?” Michelle asked.

“There’s nothing to talk about. Caleb’s a jerk. He needs to mind his own business.” She turned from her mother and bolted up the stairs to her bedroom.

After both kids were in their rooms for the night, Michelle approached Steve. “We need to talk. I’m really worried about Madison.”

“Is it the diet thing?” he asked.

“Yeah. She’s eating less and less, and I can tell she’s losing weight.”

“Seems like every one of her magazines has something on the cover about weight loss.”

“Yeah,” she replied. “I’ve seen some pretty scary anorexia cases at Magnolia,” she added, thinking about one girl in particular who’d been in her eighth grade English class the prior year until she ended up in a treatment center for eating disorders.

“You’re thinking about your student from last year, aren’t you?” he said, as if reading her mind.

“Mmm hmm. It was really sad to see how far she took the thinness thing.”

“So what do you think we should do?” her husband asked.

“I’m not sure. I’ll talk to the counselor at my school and see what she suggests. But I really think we should do something.”

“You’ve got my cooperation, honey. I’ve already mentioned to her how great she looks, but I’ll be happy to do whatever you want.”

“Maybe I’ll try making some dinners that are higher in calories too, like that lasagna she loves. You know, my mom’s recipe?”

“Oh yeah,” he replied with a grin as he patted his stomach. “Good idea, honey.”

Madison had her earphones in her ears, as she listened to some music and paged through a fashion magazine. Suddenly she remembered that Luke was going to send her pictures of his school. She picked up her phone and tapped the text icon. Nothing. He must have forgotten or gotten busy with something else.

Returning to her magazine, her eyes fell on a model about her age. The girl was wearing an off-the-shoulder shirt and very short cut-off jeans shorts. With one hand on her hip and her head cocked to the side, she had a smile on her face and a glint in her eye like she knew someone’s secret. Her long, dark hair was almost to her waist and her makeup was a little heavy but so cute.

“That’s the look I want,” Maddie said softly.

She studied the size of the girl’s arms and legs, and then stood and looked at hers in the mirror. She had a long way to go before she’d be that thin. But each time she turned away food, like the ice cream and potato today, she felt stronger and more successful. She’d just have to press on and ignore her parents and little brother. What did they know anyway?

She carefully pulled the picture out of the magazine and placed it on her bulletin board. Tomorrow she’d try to apply her make up like that. And maybe her mother would take her shopping again. She needed more sophisticated tops, and her shorts were all way too long.

When Michelle looked up at her daughter the next morning, she had to do a double take. A thick swash of black eyeliner on each lid, along with shorts that had been rolled up to her rear end, gave Madison a completely different appearance.

“What?” Madison asked innocently, clearly aware of Michelle’s stare.

“You look…different,” Michelle replied tentatively, not wanting to put her on the defensive.

“Oh, that. Yeah, it’s time your little girl grew up, don’t you think?”

Before Michelle could answer, Caleb walked into the room. “Hey Mom, can I have a ride to the park this afternoon? Some friends are meeting for kickball.”

“Will there be any adults there?” she asked.

“Buzz’s big brother and his friends are going to be playing basketball on the courts near us.”

Since Michelle knew the older boys from church and deemed them responsible enough to keep an eye on Caleb and his friends, she agreed. “But it’ll have to be after two-thirty. I’m working in my classroom until then.”

“Sure. No problem.” Caleb grabbed a muffin from the counter and sat down with them. “What happened to your eyes?” he asked Madison.

“It’s called make-up, dummy.”

Michelle gave her a warning look.

“Well it looks weird if you ask me,” Caleb replied.

“No one’s asking you.”

“That’s enough, you two,” Michelle cut in. Then turning to Madison, she asked, “What are your plans for the day?”

“I was hoping you could drop me off at Fashion Depot on your way to school. Lucy said she’d meet me there.”

“It’s not exactly ‘on the way,’ honey. What are you planning to shop for?”

“School clothes. I didn’t get that much in Portland.”

Michelle nodded. “Okay, I can give you a ride and a little cash, but you’ll need to be ready to go in about fifteen minutes. I have a department meeting at ten.”

“No problem,” Madison replied, standing and grabbing a cup of coffee.

“Coffee?” Michelle asked, trying to contain the shock in her voice.

“Yeah. I’m skipping breakfast to finish getting ready,” she replied as she walked away.

“Madison is really getting weird, Mom,” Caleb observed.

Michelle smiled. “Part of being a teenager, buddy.” But inside she felt as baffled as Caleb. Should I make Maddie remove that thick eye makeup before we leave? And what about those shorts? she thought. Should I have her roll them back down?

All of this was new territory, and Michelle wasn’t sure she was completely ready for it. Glancing over at Caleb, she also began questioning their decision to leave him home alone while she worked on her classroom for a few hours. Steve had promised to drop by during his lunch break, and her mother was nearby, but was eleven really old enough?

“Don’t forget what we discussed with your father last night,” she said to him.

“Yeah, yeah. Don’t answer the door for anyone, don’t play in the front yard, stay off the computer. I got it, Mom. Besides, Dad gave me that list of chores to do so I can earn money toward my new skateboard. I’ll be busy weeding out back and straightening up the garage.”

“Okay. But you know you can call your grandmother anytime. She’s home all day, and your dad will be here for lunch.”

“Got it, Mom,” he replied, giving her one of his adorable grins as he signaled a thumbs-up.

She reached over and ruffled his hair. “When did you get to be such a big boy?”

He rolled his eyes playfully and pushed away from the table. “Have fun at school,” he said as he walked out the back door.

Michelle went upstairs to finish getting ready. Popping her head into Madison’s room, she saw her daughter studying a picture on the bulletin board over her desk. “What’s this?” Michelle asked, hoping her voice sounded casual.

“My new look.” Madison spun and gave her a smile. “It’s cute, isn’t it?” she asked.

How do I answer this one?
Michelle wondered. “Well, yes, she’s a cute girl.”

“I mean the clothes.”

“Oh.” Michelle leaned in to look closer. The outfit was definitely suggestive. “It looks like an outfit for someone who’s trying to get attention.”

“What do you mean?” Madison’s voice had an edge to it.

Michelle turned and placed a hand gently on her daughter’s shoulder. “I just mean, it looks a little suggestive. Like she’s trying to advertise that she’s available.”

“It’s the fashion, Mom. All the models in these magazines are wearing stuff like this.”

Michelle nodded. “I get that, honey. But you’ve been brought up to be more modest than this. Besides, what about the school dress code? I don’t think that top or those short shorts would pass inspection.”

“No one cares about dress codes anymore, Mom. I see girls like this all the time at school. No one does anything about it.”

“Oh, really?”

“Really. And it’s not like anything is really showing.”

Michelle could sense this would take more time than she had this morning. “Let’s talk about it more later. I know you want to feel stylish for school. I get that. But I think this,” she gestured toward the picture, “is pushing it a little.”

“Whatever,” Madison replied, clearly disappointed in her mother’s reaction. “But I need new tops and shorts for school,” she added.

“That’s fine. But the shorts need to be a little longer than those, and no off the shoulder tops.”

Madison took a deep breath, and Michelle could see her trying to control her emotions. “Fine. But I’m getting some open necklines. I’ll just keep them on my shoulders.”

“Whatever you purchase will have to be run by me and your father before you keep it for school,” Michelle said.

Madison was silent.

“Agreed?”

“Fine. Agreed.”

Madison studied the picture on her bulletin board one more time before heading downstairs. Her stomach was growling, but she didn’t want to eat anything before trying on her new clothes. After all, she planned to lose at least five more pounds in the next week. And she always looked so bloated after she ate anything. She’d have to run tonight since she slacked off this morning.
I’ll add another mile when I go after dinner. Maybe I’ll just have vegetables, too. Meat is so fattening.

As they pulled up to the shop entrance, Madison waved to Lucy, who was waiting for her by the door.

“Have fun, honey,” her mother said.

“I will. And good luck getting your classroom all set up.” Madison hurried off before her mom could say anymore. Surely Lucy would understand and help her find some cute outfits.

After she got home from school that afternoon, Michelle went upstairs looking for Madison. She found her in her bedroom on her laptop. “So how did the shopping go?” she asked.

“Fine. I got a few tops, two pairs of shorts and a couple of skirts. They were having a big sale at Jessie’s next door.”

Jessie’s was a boutique geared toward teens. Michelle had seen some pretty edgy looks in the windows. It was popular with the kids from Magnolia Middle School where Michelle taught, as well as with the high school crowd. “Can I have a look?” she asked.

“Sure,” Madison replied, closing her computer and walking over to her closet. She pulled out her finds, already on hangers as if at home with her other clothes. She held them up, one at a time, for Michelle to see. “This one’s my favorite,” she said, showing off a soft blue cropped tee shirt with a torn neckline.

“I like the color,” Michelle said, trying to sound positive. “How does it fit?”

“Fine. I really like the neckline because it can be worn either on or off the shoulder. So you don’t have to worry about me and the dress code at school.”

Michelle nodded warily. “Let me see the shorts and skirts.”

Madison began holding them up, and Michelle could tell right away that they were all shorter than anything her daughter had owned up to this point. “They seem a little short,” she said, working to keep a casual tone.

“That’s the style, Mom.” Madison put the clothes on her bed and picked up one of her magazines. “Just flip through here and you’ll see. It’s what everyone’s wearing now.”

“I think I’d like to see them on you before you take the tags off,” Michelle said. “They are returnable, right?”

“The skirts are, but the shorts were on final clearance for the end of summer. Those can’t be returned.” Madison paused and then added, “They’re really cute. I promise you’ll like them.” She picked up one of the hangers and held the shorts up to herself. “See, Mom. They’re not bad.”

But Michelle noticed that the top of the hanger was held pretty low on Madison’s torso to give the illusion of more length. “Just let me see them on you before you think about wearing them to school.”

“Fine. But everyone will be wearing them. You’ll see. I’m sure it’ll be the same at Magnolia.” Placing the clothes back in the closet, Madison said, “I think I’ll go for a run before dinner.”

Michelle nodded. “Okay. Guess I’d better get dinner started. Your dad said he’d be home early tonight.”

“Oh, and Mom?”

“Yeah?”

“Thanks for the money to buy the clothes,” Madison said with a smile. “You’re the best.”

Michelle gave her a hug and then headed downstairs, a mixture of emotions churning inside. Madison was changing, but the sweet girl she’d always been was still in there, too.

“Can we go for a walk?” Michelle asked Steve as they cleared the dinner dishes together.

“Sure. I just need to make a quick call, and then I’m all yours,” he replied, placing the plates he was carrying onto the counter by the sink.

Michelle loaded the dishwasher and went to find Madison. Her daughter was stretched out on the floor doing sit ups. “Should you be doing that right after you ate?” Michelle asked.

“Forty-seven, forty-eight, forty-nine, fifty.” Madison let out a breath and glanced up at her. “Did you need something?”

“Dad and I are going for a walk in a few minutes. Caleb’s playing his motor cross video game, but I just wanted to make sure you weren’t planning on going anywhere while we’re gone.”

“I’ll be here,” she replied, hopping up and heading for the stairs. “I’ll be in my room if he needs me.” She turned and added, “But make sure you remind him to knock. Last time he just barged in.”

“Will do,” Michelle promised. “And thanks, honey.”

Madison waved without looking back.

Michelle peeked into Steve’s study and saw him on the phone. He held up one finger and mouthed, “Be right there.”

She smiled and nodded, then went over and sat beside Caleb on the couch. “Dad and I are going for a walk, but Maddie will be upstairs in her room if you need her.”

He continued to stare at the screen and manipulate the buttons on the controller he gripped in both hands.

“Did you hear me?” Michelle asked, a little louder this time.

Caleb nodded without looking over. “Got it, Mom.”

“If you go up to get your sister for any reason, be sure you remember to knock.”

“Yeah.” Caleb twisted his wrist and stood in excitement as he watched a racecar flip on the screen. “Got you!” he called out to the game.