Authors: Ariel S. Winter
Keeping Phil alive was simply torturing everyone, a Pyrrhic victory.
These thoughts cycled like a virus, his system processing without computing, drowning out Phil's endless prattle with its long pauses and bursts of static. It was never clear to Clarke if Phil was aware of how disjointed his speech was, how incomprehensible much of the time.
“What is wrong?” Phil said, but it was the pause after the question that focused Clarke's attention. He had wheeled Phil out to the spot where he had first met Cog.
“Are you happy?”
“What is happy?” Phil said.
“Damn right,” Clarke said.
“I am a robot . . . do nothing . . . anyway.”
Clarke wasn't sure what his brother meant, but he also didn't care. “What's it like when your battery dies?” he said.
“Nothing. Then I'm in your room again, waking up to you.”
“There's no warning?”
“If . . . never work . . .”
“And if you didn't wake up?”
Phil's answer was static.
Clarke remembered the dead boy. That had made him happy. Perhaps he and Cog would find another one to destroy.
Phil was still talking. Eventually the words “. . . no difference . . .” came out, and then Phil seized, his shoulder gears spinning.
Clarke, as always, was a bit disgusted by it.
The high-pitched buzz of a motor drifted from the direction of Barren Cove, rising to become insidious. Clarke zoomed to see Cog riding a four-wheel ATV, standing, a bit hunched over in order to reach the steering wheel with one hand. He thrilled at the sight; perhaps there'd be some fun today after all, but then he panicked about Phil frozen beside him. He'd managed to prevent Cog from interacting with his brother thus far, and the idea of the impending meeting overrode any initial excitement at his friend's approach.
Cog had seen them, and he turned deliberately so that he was coming full speed directly at them. At the last moment, he jerked the wheel, skidding, his rear tire bumping the wheel of Phil's chair, as he spun the ATV around them, ending up facing the brothers in the narrow space between them and the cliff edge. He left the motor idling.
“Is this your brother?” Cog said. He stepped onto the small hood of the vehicle and then down to the ground. “What is he?”
Clarke jumped in front of his friend and put his hand on Cog's chest. “He's a robot. What do you think?”
Cog held out both his hands. “Of course he is. Of course he is.”
Phil's shoulder gears stopped then, and he said, “Hello.”
Clarke was still between the two robots, preventing Cog from getting any closer.
“Cog,” he said over Clarke's shoulder. “Your brother and I hang.”
“Does that make you happy?” Phil said.
Cog started to laugh, his eyebrows going way up. “Happy? Ha, ha, man.”
Clarke stepped back, softening at his friend's laughter. He played his recorded, “Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.”
“Clarke and . . . 'cussing if . . . life . . .”
“Clarke . . . krrr-shhh-ch . . . I'm . . . krr-krrr . . . malfunctioning . . . ererer.” Cog laughed.
Clarke pushed Cog hard enough that the larger robot stumbled back a few steps, his legs hitting the still-idling ATV.
“Whoa, robo, I'm just having some fun,” Cog said.
“Clarke, it's all right,” Phil said.
It wasn't all right, though, Clarke thought. This was exactly why he had kept them apart. Not to protect Phil, but to protect himself from seeing Phil through someone else's eyes.
“How do you like my new ride?” Cog said, stepping aside to better show off the ATV. “Some human shot himself in town, and I found this in the shed out back of his house.”
“Sounds like it's gas powered,” Clarke said.
“Yeah, psycho had a few barrels of the stuff out there too. Guess the humans didn't enforce the laws out here too much.”
“Or they were grandfathered in,” Phil said.
“Well, this grandpa is grand-dead,” Cog said. “I was think
ing of seeing if I could ride it off the cliff. Baby's built for the beach. Wanted to find you first.”
“Later,” Clarke said, wanting Cog to leave. “I'll catch up with you later.”
“I'd like to see you jump,” Phil said.
“Your brother's into it,” Cog said, pointing.
“Later,” Clarke said again.
“Not . . . just you . . .”
“You tell him about our air wrestling?” Cog said. “I don't know how he does it,” he said to Phil, “but your brother always ends up on top.”
“Air wrestling?” Phil said.
“You didn't tell him?” Cog said.
Clarke could feel himself getting angry. He knew Cog was still laughing at Phil. The robot was a fucking idiot.
Cog was explaining their air wrestling, a term Clarke had never heard before.
“. . . do it . . .” Phil said.
“Seeâ”
That was all Clarke needed. He grabbed Cog and threw him off the cliff before running and jumping so that he caught the big robot midwaist before he'd even begun to drop, and then he maneuvered him down, so that Clarke was making a perfect dive, Cog to take the full impact. The sand burst around them, and Cog was laughing.
Clarke jumped up onto his feet.
“Fuck,” Cog said.
Clarke scaled the cliff before Cog even got up. He made it to the top and went right to Phil's chair, ready to roll him away.
“What . . . doing?”
Cog's laugh interrupted Clarke from responding. “He got me off guard,” Cog said.
“I always get you off guard,” Clarke said.
“Yeah?” Cog said, stumbling toward them. Then he grabbed Clarke, to try to do what Clarke had just done to him, but Clarke grabbed Cog as well, never letting go, so when the larger robot threw Clarke, he was pulled along with him, and both landed in a heap on the beach.
“Almost,” Cog said as they stood.
“Yeah, right,” Clarke said.
They raced up the cliff, as they had done so many times, and reached flat land at the same time.
Phil had gotten out of his chair and made his way over to the ATV. He was leaning over in preparation of trying to throw his leg over the seat.
“Hey, little bro,” Cog said. “Where are you going?”
“Phil,” Clarke said. “What are you doing?”
“Thought . . .” He threw his leg up and got stuck there, his voice hissing.
Clarke went to him and started to pick him up to return him to his seat.
“Hey, maybe your brother wants a turn,” Cog said. “You . . . krrssshh . . . krrsshhhh . . . turn . . .” he said, mocking Phil's manner of speech.
Clarke turned on his friend again, ready to do more than throw him off a cliff.
Cog put his hands up in a pose of surrender at the same time that Phil said, “Clarke . . .” distracting Clarke for a moment. Cog leapt around him and picked up Phil, holding him above his head in both hands.
Clarke leapt onto the ATV, using its height to jump over Cog's head, grabbing his brother in a tackle, and falling with the one-armed robot to the ground, rolling, coming back up and throwing himself at Cog, his bare right hand clamping on
his friend's throat while the other hand tore through Cog's shirt into his simul-flesh.
Cog tore at Clarke's face, but his still flesh-covered hands couldn't tear the same way that Clarke's metal ones could. “Come on,” Cog said. “Come on. You want to?”
“You stay the fuck away from my brother,” Clarke said.
“Brother? He's a freak-show junk heap. The ATV has more going for it.”
Phil put his one hand on Clarke's shoulder. “No, no, no, no . . .” Phil was stuck again, and all of Clarke's anger turnedâBeachstone, Mary's pain, Kent, Barren Coveâand he grabbed Phil in a way he hadn't since that first day on the beach when he'd torn off his brother's arm, and he hurled him over the cliff.
Cog laughed. “Man, you fucked up my chest,” he said.
Clarke stared at the spot where Phil had gone over.
“I knew you were robo,” Cog said, “but that was fucking awesome.”
Clarke turned to look at his friend. His eyes saw the handmade wheelchair instead, and he went and threw that off the cliff as well, and he screamed and played his prerecorded laugh, “Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.” He held both hands out to either side of him and ran through the fingers, one at a time in sequence and back again.
He looked at Cog, who was watching him with great respect, and then he leapt off the edge, forming a perfect dive, landing in a roll, and coming up on his feet, a move he'd practiced many times.
Phil was lying facedown several feet away, the wheelchair nearby as well. The broken robot's legs were jerking, causing a horrible grinding sound. The shoulder gears were spinning, of course, the sand spraying where they touched the ground.
Clarke was horrified. Look at him. Exactly the same as that first day on the beach almost two months ago, jerking and seizing in the sand, no different, nothing changed, and to what end?
Cog landed somewhere behind him and approached, but he was with it enough to know not to say anything. Instead they stood there, listening to the ever present sound of the water and the grinding of gears, until eventually the gears stopped.
“What happened?” Cog said.
“His battery died,” Clarke said.
“His battery!”
Clarke glared at the big robot, who turned his head away. Then Clarke bent down, picked Phil up, and started walking along the beach in the direction of Barren Cove. He left the wheelchair where it was, shouldering the weight himself, bringing his brother home.
19.
KAPEC AND CLARKE
dug the grave. Mary watched from the upstairs window. The day was beautiful. What she could see of the ocean from the house was placid, a deep blue line just below the blue of the sky. When she stopped to listen, she could always hear the ocean churning from anywhere near Barren Cove, but from the house itself, she never saw the waves, only the water that was far enough from shore as to be some other in-between place of calm and quiet. Now, the sound of the grave being dug floated up to her, even through the window. As she watched, the hole grew deep enough that Clarke jumped in with his shovel. Kapec stoppedâthere wasn't enough room in the grave for both of themâand leaned against his own shovel, watching Clarke work. She could imagine that Kapec was fretting over the destruction of his beautiful lawn. He would be out with the seed later that afternoon, no doubt. For now, he stooped to shape the mound of dirt beside the hole, smoothing it, unable to leave even a pile of dirt lumpy and uneven.
Mary had been worried that they would dig up Asimov 3000 or worse, Master Vandley, and with each shovelful of dirt, she felt relieved. Their unmarked cemetery. Their backyard.
“Have they finished yet?”
She could hear Beachstone limping toward her, but she didn't turn away from the window. “No,” she said.
He stopped short of being able to see out the window. If she had counted his steps correctly, he was five feet behind her. “Well, let me know when they're ready.”
The sound of the shovel hitting the dirt reached them. Crunch. The sound of the dirt hitting the mound followed. Thump.
Mary watched. Clarke worked with the same even movements, like clockwork. She wondered why Beachstone's limp had become more pronounced. She couldn't help but feel that it was affected, and yet, what did she really know about human mechanics? Every human was an individual, and so all the medical texts in the world couldn't tell her anything about Beachstone. She still had the same fascination with him she'd had when she first saw the boy limping all those years ago. What was pain?
Beachstone sat on the bed behind her.
Crunch. Thump.
“Does your leg hurt terribly?” Mary said.
“No, no, I'm fine,” Beachstone said.
“We haven't run out of aspirin yet.”
“I'm fine.”
Mary had noticed that Mr. Brown was getting older, that his store was less fully stocked, that nobody else was ever there when she went for supplies. She hadn't said anything to Beachstone yet, and Beachstone never went to town. There was still time before she had to make other arrangements.
“It's finally over,” Beachstone said from the bed. He waited. “You know this is the right thing to do.”
“I don't know that,” Mary said.
“It is the right thing to do.”
Clarke was lower in the hole now, probably up to his shoulders. Graves had been dug deep to prevent disease as the biodegradable corpses rotted. How deep did a robot's grave need to be? They had made Asimov 3000's the requisite six feet.
“Mary, come here,” Beachstone said.
Mary didn't turn.
“I failed us. It is my failure. But I'm sorry.”
Crunch. Thump. Kapec stopped the flow of the dirt from the mound back into the grave with his shovel. He scooped some up and tossed it onto the other side of the mound. Clarke changed the angle at which he was digging.
“And Clarke,” Beachstone's tone hardened, “that sadistic little shit, to make a mockery of our son! Our son!” The last a rasp.
Mary spun. She must have looked shocked, because Beachstone's manner softened at once. “He's my son, too,” Mary managed, just above a whisper.
Beachstone nodded. “I know. He's ourâ”
“
Clarke
is my son, too.”
Beachstone's eyes narrowed. “No.”
Mary willed herself to meet his gaze.
“What filial love he's shown then,” Beachstone said. “Torturing you with this. Weeks of dragging thatâ” He stopped himself.
Whatever he had been about to say hung between them.
“Come sit with me, Mary.” It sounded like a demand, but she knew he was upset and needed to be comforted, just like
a child. Only Mary got to see that. His face looked blank. He probably thought that it looked pained. “I'm sorry, Mary,” he said. He held out his hands to her, reaching.
She stepped within range, and he latched onto her, burying his head in her middle.
“We still could fix him,” she said. “I could do the mechanics. Even Clarkeâ”
He jerked his head back. “No!”
“Did you ever think Clarke cared for Philip out of brotherly love?”
“Clarke! Don't fool yourself.”
Mary closed her eyes and paused. This was about Philip. “We could still fix him.”
Beachstone buried himself in her again. “No,” he said softly into her stomach.
“He didn't ask for this. And there's no reason something couldn't be done.”
“No,” Beachstone said, pulling away. “No. Don't you understand? He was supposed to be ours.” He patted the bed. “Sit down here.”
Mary just looked down at him. She understood. She understood all too well. And that was why she didn't understand how he didn't see that by burying their son they were admitting something. And what was worse, she was worried he was willing to sacrifice whatever hope they had of salvaging their dream as an act of spite for Clarke's benefit.
“This was supposed to be ours,” Beachstone said. He closed his eyes and shook his head, trying to see what he wanted to say. He stood up. “I know that it was my fault, but I was hoping that you would . . . that you could . . . just, well . . . I'm still here.” He grabbed ahold of her, his arms tightened around her neck, and he brought his mouth to her ear. “I'm still right here.
We're still both here. We still have each other. I have you.” He squeezed even harder.
Mary was surprised at his strength. He was so spindly. He was still sick so often. He redoubled his hold on her neck. A human would have choked, Mary thought. A human would have said,
Wait
, while prying at his arm, and he would have had to let go, just a little bit or he would have strangled her, but she allowed him to continue hugging her. She wanted to be held. He still hugged like he was a little child. Had she grown?
Beachstone pulled back. He looked toward the window. There had been the thump of the dirt hitting the mound, but there had been no crunch of the shovel sinking back into the dirt. Clarke was too low perhaps. They both paused in the silence. No new thump came. Beachstone took his cane and started toward the window. “They must be done.”
“We could fix him,” Mary said one last time. She kept her voice neutral, purposely robotic.
“No,” he said, without looking at her. “They're finished.” He started toward the door. When she didn't fall in step beside him, he stopped and looked back at her. “Come,” he said, holding out his hand.
She stepped forward, allowing him to loop her arm in his. He leaned against her, and she knew that he was exaggerating his weakness. He had stood on his own only the moment before. He was still young. He was healthy for once. But she was a daughter leading her father. She was a bride being walked down the aisle. They had to part to go through the door and she fell behind him in the hallway.
Clarke was just mounting the stairs as they reached the top step. He stepped back, giving them the right of way. Beachstone passed Clarke without a word. He dug our son's grave, Mary wanted to say, regardless of whatever else you thought,
but there was no reason to call attention to their pettiness. “I was just going up to get him,” Clarke said as she passed.
“Is Kent coming?” Mary said.
“He couldn't decide. But he'll be there.” He bounded up the stairs.
All this work, Mary thought. Beachstone would say it was morbid enjoyment in staging his own little funeral. Let's dig a grave! We'll bury someone too! It was true that most of the time it seemed the boy respected no one. That was no doubt inherited from his father, but she had meant what she'd said about brotherly love. Or she wanted toâa piece of her in him. It gave her some comfort as she went out to bury her second son.
Why hadn't she realized how poor a job Beachstone had done when she was doing the programming? Beachstone had said it was all his fault, and she hadn't corrected him. But she should have known. But then, maybe she had known and hadn't wanted to correct him then either.
Beachstone stepped out into the backyard and Mary stepped down behind him. He turned, offering his arm, and this time, when she took it, she felt as though he had intended to support her. She had brooded upstairs. He knew that. He felt guilty. Well, good. She wanted to mourn Philip. The old human saying was that a parent should never have to bury a child. Her father had understood that. He had had Beachstone, though. There should never have been any reason for Mary to understand losing someone this way. She wanted to scream for a moment: he didn't ask for this! She messaged Kent instead.
“Neither did you,” Kent messaged back. He didn't turn from beside Kapec at the graveside. “Don't you feel almost human?”
She didn't answer him but led, or was led by, Beachstone to a spot just beside her brother.
A bit of dirt slid from the top of the mound and rained into
the grave. Kapec smacked the mound with his shovel. “He's good parts still, even if you don't want him,” he said.
Mary looked at Beachstone, afraid of his reaction, but he acted as though he hadn't heard.
“Don't think they bury anyone in the cities anymore. They don't even bury the humans. They just burn them.”
Why wasn't anyone stopping him? The gardener!
Clarke came out of the house carrying Philip in his arms. He had rested the removed arm in Philip's lap. Mary wondered where he had kept it; she hadn't seen it since activation day, all those hours standing in Clarke's doorway, watching Philip charge, torturing herself. Philip's neck was rigid, his head still upright.
“Damn shame,” Kapec said, but even he seemed to have the sense to be quiet.
Clarke walked right up to the edge of the grave and jumped in. He bent down and placed Philip on the ground with such tenderness that Mary knew she had been right. There
was
love there. Then he ruined it by looking up at Beachstone with a mean smile, a hateful gloat.
“There should have been a coffin,” Kent said.
“What?” Beachstone said.
“You should have built a coffin. A box to put him in.”
“We didn't for Father,” Mary said.
Clarke climbed out of the grave. Philip was lying in the bottom of the hole. His arm still lay on his stomach. Wires protruded from the open socket of his shoulder. The grinding of his gears had been something terrible. It was so unnatural. And his voice, so mechanical.
Kapec started brushing the dirt back into the hole. It filled the side of the grave between Philip's body and the grave wall.
“Wait!” Beachstone said.
Kapec stopped and looked at Beachstone, his shovel arrested midair.
“We should say something.”
“To another human fuckup,” Clarke said, his eyes glued to the robot in the ground.
“Clarke, behave,” Mary messaged.
“But haven't I, Mother?” he messaged back. “Better than anyone.”
She flinched. She steadied Beachstone even though he hadn't moved.
“The young are wasted on us,” Kent said. “We can't really understand youth, because, after all, aren't we forever young ourselves? Wasn't there a time when I wasn't at all? Philip is again at that time. I didn't know him. Those of us here who did knew him well enough to want to say good-bye with such formality. I can only hope . . . Rest in peaceâthat's what is said, right?”
“Yes,” Mary said. She became aware that Beachstone was crying. He was silent but his breathing had changed. She turned her head just enough to see him, and she saw the tears streaming down his face. A dribble of snot drained from one nostril and beaded at the rise of his lip.
“He's crying,” Kent group messaged.
“Have you seen this before?” Clarke group messaged. He stared openly.
“Yes,” Mary responded, and then realized that doing so had been a kind of betrayal. The robots all stood in silence as Beachstone cried. He squeezed Mary's arm tighter, and she felt lucky in that moment. She let her momentary sense of guilt go and relished the fact that he needed her. He gestured with his arm, and when he did, his breath escaped from between his closed lips. He gasped, and there was the wet sound of sa
liva or maybe his dripping nose. Kapec, silent and respectful, understood the gesture and began pushing the dirt from the mound into the grave. It began to cover Philip's body now. Clarke picked up his shovel and began throwing full shovelfuls into the grave. Crunch, thump, only now, up close, the thump was accompanied by the spray of the dirt as it broke apart and settled. It blended with the sound of the ocean from below.
The dirt began to cover Philip's body. Mary understood now why people had built coffins before, and it wasn't for the same disease-preventing reasons that they had buried their dead. It was because it was unnatural for someone to be buried under the ground. She expected Philip to sit up at any moment and brush off the dirt and chastise them for trying to bury him. His arm was pushed from his body by one of the shovelfuls of dirt. It fell next to his body and rested half on him and half submerged.
Beachstone gasped for breath. Mary envied him his physical emotions. She could feel her brother's awe. Beachstone looked at all of them, turned, and walked away.
Mary waited a moment. Philip's face was still uncovered, but parts of him were completely hidden by the dirt. She turned and followed after Beachstone. He was nearly at the house. See, he must not need to limp as badly as he lets on, she thought. She caught up with him just inside the kitchen. He turned to her. His face was red, his eyes wet, tears and snot ready to fall from his chin. He grabbed her head in both of his hands. “I love you,” he said. “You know that. I will always love you.”