It seemed to him that an eternity passed before her grip on his wrist finally went lax and the tension left her body. She sighed then, her breath catching in a whispery huff like that of a child who, had cried itself to sleep.
BABY LOVE 247
She leaned more heavily into him, twisting slightly at the waist, her soft hip nudging his manhood. His shaft twitched and sprang to attention. Rafe stopped breathing, afraid the unaccustomed hardness might wake her.
He needn't have worried. She was asleep. Cramped from maintaining one position for so long, he eased onto his back, gently drawing her with him. She murmured and turned. Seeking the hollow of his shoulder with her satiny cheek, she snuggled close, angling her bent leg across his thighs, her pelvis against his hip, her breasts molding to the hard planes of his chest.
He let his eyes fall closed.
Maggie.
God, she felt so soft and incredibly sweet. Being able to hold her like this was like receiving a miracle. It didn't matter that he couldn't make love to her. In time, that would change.
For now, he would take her just as she was and count himself blessed. As he drifted toward sleep, Rafe vowed to himself that no matter what it took, he would protect her and the people she loved from any more pain and ugliness. But as he slipped from semiconsciousness into troubled dreams, his confidence in his ability to do that left him.
He was once again in the back of the horse trailer, peering through the fury of a terrible hailstorm at the station wagon as it hovered at the edge of the embankment, about to carry the people he loved to their deaths. Only this time, instead of it being Susan and his children in the car, he somehow knew it was Maggie and Jaimie.
In that split second that somehow became an eternity in his dreams, just before the car plunged over the cliff, the face of the driver turned toward him. To his horror, it wasn't Susan's face he saw anymore. And, God help him, it wasn't Maggie's, either.
The face was that of Lonnie Boyle, and he was laughing maniacally.
Everything will be all right.
Over the next three days while Maggie was still confined mostly to the bedroom, Rafe reaffirmed that promise in dozens of different ways. Each morning, without fail, he and Heidi joined her in the bedroom for breakfast, then before Heidi left for school, he placed a longdistance call to Prior, running interference with Lonnie and handing Maggie or Heidi the receiver only after their mom got on the line. Maggie was relieved beyond words to talk with her mother and know firsthand that she was all right, and she knew it meant a lot to Heidi as well. Given Helen's mental and emotional immaturity, Heidi had always looked to Maggie for parenting and wasn't as attached to or dependent upon her mother as most children her age might be. But she did love Helen and worry about her.
For the remainder of each day, Rafe staved off boredom, entertaining Maggie with a host of restful activities. He watched romantic movies with her one afternoon, taught her to play poker the next, and then, on the last day, piled her bed high with decorating catalogs so she might choose a theme for Heidi's bedroom and Jaimie's nursery.
As much as Maggie appreciated his thoughtfulness, though, what really touched her were all the silly, incredibly sweet things he did. He frequently telephoned
248,
her on a separate line from another room in the house to engage her in ridiculous conversations. Talking on the phone, he explained, was an essential part of dating. Sometimes they simply teased each other about silly things. At other times, they exchanged information about themselves, sharing stories from their childhood or relating their most embarrassing moments. Maggie learned that his favorite color had once been blue, but that his tastes had changed recently and now he loved brown— the exact color of her eyes. His favorite meal was a steak and a baked potato, slathered with butter, sour cream, and fresh chives. His favorite song was "The Way We Were, " his favorite movie
The Yearling,
his favorite book
Where the Red Fern Grows,
and his pet peeves warm beer and wet toilet paper.
Because she knew his time might be better spent tending to ranch business, Maggie felt guilty about all the hours he wasted on the phone with her. When she suggested that he might use the time to begin familiarizing her with the bookkeeping system, he insisted that silly phone conversations were a courtship ritual every woman should experience. He also maintained it was far easier to speak openly on the phone than in person, and since he wanted to learn all he could about her, it seemed a small price to pay. Maggie thought he was a little crazy, but it was the very nicest kind of crazy.
One morning during her confinement, he invited her "out" to breakfast and escorted her and Heidi to the kitchen where he whipped up one of his ' 'famous Kendrick omelets. " The following evening, he invited her "out" for a candlelight dinner and movie. It didn't matter that going out with him was actually only a short trek from her bedroom to another part of the house. It didn't matter that his omelet fell or that the steaks were a little charred. No, what counted to Maggie was that he cared enough to make the gestures.
On her first day of freedom from the bedroom, Rafe took her to town to see Dr. Kirsch for a follow-up exam,
250 CATHERINE ANDERSON
after which she was given another ten-day round of antibiotics and told she was recovering nicely.
"You can resume your usual activities, " the physician told her with a kindly smile, "the only exception being that you shouldn't breast-feed your son until you finish your course of medication. I'd suggest you wait at least two days after taking the last dose, just to make sure it's entirely out of your system. "
Maggie felt as if she'd just been released from prison. She wanted to throw back her head and shout that she was well. As though Rafe sensed exactly how she felt, he flashed her a huge grin as they left the clinic and headed down the busy sidewalk. His breath formed puffs of vapor in the chill air. "Becca's watching Jaimie. No reason to rush home. Let's celebrate. "
Sidestepping with him to avoid a collision with an oncoming pedestrian, Maggie laughed and shrugged.
"How can we celebrate?"
He curled an arm loosely around her shoulders, the spicy scent of his aftershave teasing her senses. "How about an early lunch downtown and then shopping till we drop?"
"Shopping? For what?"
He cast her a mock frown. "For
what?
Mrs. Kendrick, need I remind you that your wardrobe is sorely lacking?"
"I can't pay this much!" she whispered later when they entered a women's apparel shop and she saw the price tag on a blouse he liked.
"Sweetheart, money isn't at a premium anymore, remember?"
With numb fingers, Maggie checked some other garment tags, and the least expensive blouse she found was eighty-nine dollars. One was two hundred forty-nine dollars, and it was plain
cotton.
Oh, God. Rafe wanted to buy her several tops, and at these costs, he would blow a thousand dollars before she could blink.
A tight, airless feeling filled her chest. If he broke it
BABY LOVE 251
off with her, she still wanted to reimburse him for all the money he'd spent. On a waitress's income, it would take her forever to settle the debt unless she put a cap on expenditures.
"I admit I need clothes, but this is highway robbery, " she insisted. "Isn't there a K Mart or Wal-Mart in Crystal?"
Instead of answering, he bunched the blouse he held in his fists and just stood there, clenching his teeth and staring down at one of the buttons, which she felt fairly certain was made of 14-karat gold. For an awful moment, she feared he was about to lace her up one side and down the other. Instead, he took a deep breath, relaxed his grip on the cloth, and seemed to shrug it off, When he turned toward her, he was smiling. He nudged his hat back, held the blouse up to see how it would look on her, and told the clerk, "She'll try this one on. "
The clerk took the blouse to the dressing room.
"Rafe, didn't you hear me?" Maggie whispered as he turned away to resume browsing.
"I heard you. " He regarded yet another expensive top that he had selected from the rack, then draped it over his arm. "I'm ignoring you. "
"I've always worked and paid my own way. I feel uncomfortable about letting someone else buy me things. "
He cut her a sharp glance. "Why don't you say what you mean, Maggie? That you feel uncomfortable letting a
man
buy you things. More specifically me. "
"That isn't it. "
"Isn't it? You talk about paying your own way. 'No free rides. ' But it's so much bullshit, and we both know it. The truth is, you're afraid I'll insist on another kind of payback. "
With growing alarm, Maggie watched him pluck another blouse from the rack. It was the one that cost two hundred forty-nine dollars. "It's a matter of pride. It's
252 CATHERINE ANDERSON
your
money, not mine. I've done nothing to earn it. I haven't so much as washed a dirty dish or dusted a piece of furniture in your house. Can't you understand how I feel?"
He sighed and finally stopped rummaging to give her his full attention. His gray-blue eyes delved deeply into hers. After a moment, he softly said, "Is this going to be an issue with you forever? From day one, it's always been something. The motel room, the food, the hot plate. It's all right to let your husband buy you things. You're not on the payroll. You're my
wife. "
"There's no crime in being thrifty, is there? Why throw money away? Give the extra to charity. "
"Before I left the ranch, I donated plenty. I'll continue to do that now, and probably on a much larger scale. I'll never waste money that could be put to better use, just for the joy of blowing it. But, by the same token, since I have the means, I refuse to count pennies when it comes to providing for my wife and child. Or for Heidi, either, for that matter. It makes me feel good, being able to buy nice things for the three of you. Is there a crime in
that?"
Maggie's gaze fell to the price tag. Her heart stuttered. "Can we compromise and find a
medium-priced
store?"
"Jesus Christ, " he said under his breath.
"Don't get mad, please?"
He gave a humorless huff of laughter. "Mad? You're hurting my feelings, damn it. I do have some, you know. " He leaned closer to avoid being overheard. "We have
millions
in the bank.
Millions,
Maggie. And you're haggling about the prices of necessities? Why? I can think of only one reason. If there's another I'm overlooking, please enlighten me because, otherwise, this little dialogue is a slap in the face. I've
never
demanded a thing from you.
Nothing, zilch!
Do you think I'm keeping a tally, saving up for an all
-weeker?"
Maggie inched back to put some distance between
BABY LOVE 253
their noses. "I told you, it isn't that. I'm just frugal by nature and prefer to bargain-shop. "
"What's your solution? To own one pair of jeans and one blouse? To go around looking like a beggar?
People will think I'm a cheap-ass jerk, making my wife go without while I wear a Rolex and five-hundred-dollar boots. "
"It isn't my aim to look like a beggar. I'd just prefer to shop at a discount department store. I don't have to spend a fortune to look nice. "
He laid the second blouse over his arm. Maggie suspected he was counting to ten. Slowly. He shifted his weight from one foot to the other, looking out of place among the racks of feminine apparel. Tall, dark, rugged. In the leather jacket, with the black Stetson tipped back to reveal his burnished features, he was so handsome he made her pulse race.
Evidently, counting to ten didn't work very well. His eyes glinted as he ran his gaze the length of her.
"True. You'd look great in a burlap sack. But that doesn't mean I intend to let you wear one. "
"I wasn't planning to go with any burlap this season. " She glanced over her shoulder to be sure no one was standing nearby. "Honestly, Rafe, I'll be perfectly happy with cheaper clothes. If I want something special later, I'll go to work part-time and buy it myself. I'd feel better, doing it that way. "
"Maybe you'd be happy with cheaper clothes, " he conceded, "but I wouldn't. I can afford to buy you nice things. I want to buy you nice things. As for you earning the money yourself, if you're talking about waiting tables, even mention doing that again, and I'm going to make Hiroshima look like a cap gun going off. "
Maggie refrained from pointing out that he seemed pretty close to detonation already.
"You wanna go to college? Fine by me. Wanna pursue a career? Fine by me. I'll never try to hold you back.
But as God is my witness, it'll be over my dead body
254 CATHERINE ANDERSON
that you
ever
wait tables again, letting some trucker pinch your butt so he'll give you a better tip. Got it?"
"I
never
let anyone pinch my butt to get a better tip!" she cried, her voice carrying the length of the store.
She no sooner spoke than she winced and felt fiery heat rush to her cheeks. She saw the clerk poke her head out of the dressing room to gape at them.
Rafe rubbed his jaw, looking sheepish. "Low blow. I'm sorry. I know you didn't. " When he focused on her again, his eyes had begun to twinkle, all trace of anger gone.
"This
is one for the record books. I'm fighting with my wife in one of the classiest joints in town. " He cocked a dark eyebrow. "Please tell me you don't throw stuff or break things when you get pissed. The clerks in here give women lessons on how to put their bras on right. "
A startled giggle erupted from Maggie. This man. Sometimes she felt as if he had attached invisible strings to her emotions and that he could play her like a well-tuned harp. There was nothing funny about this.
Why in the world was she laughing? Relief, she guessed. He seemed willing to declare a truce, and she couldn't help but leap at the offer.
"There's more than one way to put on a bra?".
A mischievous grin slanted across his mouth. "Let's go home and I'll show you. "
"Like you know? As I recall, you flunked Bra Clasps 101. "
"That doesn't mean I don't know my logistics. Susan came in here sometimes, and she gave me a blow-by-blow account. "
"Really. "
He leaned close. "No push-and~stuff allowed in a place like this. You bend forward and gently
ease
into the cups. It's the only way to get a proper fit. "
She couldn't quite credit that they were having this conversation, let alone in a public place. "That cinches it, " she said, keeping her tone light. "We have to find
BABY LOVE 255
a discount store. I'm a 'push-and-stuff gal. "
"Married to a guy who's doing his damnedest to
ease
you into some decent clothes. Get used to it. "
"I'm trying. "
"Good. " His voice went low and husky. "Seriously, Maggie. Oregon's a community property state. What's mine is yours, what's yours is mine. That means my money is your money. You insist on paying me back for every cent I ever spent if we end up splitting the sheets? Fine by me. You can pay me back out of your half of our assets. "
"That isn't what we stipulated in the agreement we signed. The little black book, remember? Keeping a tally, and me paying you back with my "own money. "
"That may have been your take on it but it wasn't necessarily mine. Where in that agreement did it say
'your own money' ?
No waiting tables again, period, end of discussion. " He chucked her under the chin.
"Just relax and enjoy shopping. Please?"
Maggie knew when she was beaten. She either had to let him buy her clothes, or they would get in a huge fight. Since he was more than a little frightening when he got really angry, she opted to take the easy way out. "All right. But in my opinion, these clothes in here cost the earth. I could happily
ease
into cheaper ones. "
"But you'll look so beautiful. " He leaned down and kissed the tip of her nose. "Think of it as your gift to me. I'm the fellow who has to look at you. "