Anthology Complex (25 page)

Chapter 43:

"265 DEAD"

It's early September now, and on my favorite television channel they are
reporting that since the beginning of the year, two-hundred and sixty-five
people have been killed at the hands of another person. They normally don't
report this number, but because it is so high someone has to take notice. I
continue to watch, and as a special they have a section on one of their reporters
going into the inner city and interviewing the residents that live in the
places where the homicide rate is so high. As I watch these people talk, I
slowly realize how sometimes when we try to remember our dreams, they appear to
us in the presentation of a movie or a television show in the sense that we
aren't exactly in the piece, but looking at it from an undisclosed perspective.
A front-row seat to the showing of our own mind at work.

Rock puts down his gun and says to his two peers, "Remember that these
niggas put thirteen of our people in a building that had bugs crawling on the
walls." Someone opens the door to the room where Rock and his peers are
loading their guns, weaponry which will be used to attack the people they call
their enemies, and informs the three that everything is in place, that the
targets are returning to the corner.

Rock takes his gun and as many clips as he can store on his person, as
do his two peers, and they get in their designated vehicle and begin to drive
towards their destination.

Eight minutes prior to the departure of Rock and his two peers, an
elementary school had just ended its school-day and the teachers were sending
their students home. Among the students are two sisters who live about five
blocks away from their school. The sisters begin to walk down a street that
they could paint even with their eyes closed.

On the other side of the city, a man named Spider is pulling into a
parking spot. After he parks, he gets out of his car and begins to walk down an
alley that leads to the backside of the storyteller's apartment building. Near
the backside of the building, hidden deep inside a bush, Spider finds the bag
of money that Jamal had left there for the enemy. Soon after, Spider enters the
apartment building to deposit Derek's letter with the help of a mailman, and
then leaves.

In a police department somewhere in between the location of these two
stories, there are two cops who are arguing with each other in front of their
superior officer. One white cop who is concerned with the amount of drugs in
the city, and one black cop who is concerned with the increasing number of
homicides in the city. They argue because the police department doesn't have
enough resources to be committed to both.

Rock parks the vehicle a few blocks away from the shooting spot, and the
three of them split up to surround the enemy. Rock becomes doubtful as he sees
there are pedestrians around, but proceeds despite this fact.

Malcolm and Marcus, who are standing on a street corner selling drugs to
those who desire them, are completely unaware of what is going to happen next.
The two sisters who are now not too far away from the corner that Malcolm and
Marcus are standing on know of this corner, which is why they always walk
through an alley to get to the other side of the street.

Rock walks slowly towards the enemy, crushing an empty vial that once
housed heroin. Rock, who is to be the first attacker, reveals himself and
begins to shoot at Malcolm and Marcus. All nearby pedestrians scatter and all
those who hear the shots from their homes begin to hide. Malcolm quickly dives
towards a nearby vehicle, one where he has placed a gun of his own on the top
of the front right tire. Malcolm quickly returns fire, as does Marcus after he
has found cover. Coming up behind them and on the side of them are Rock's two
peers, who are also now firing at Malcolm and Marcus. Because of the lack of
training, the rounds that are being fired are hitting just about everything
except their intended targets.

After Malcolm and Marcus see that they are being closed in, they both
decide to run separate ways in an effort to force the enemy to delay in making
a decision. There are now empty streets and silent homes. Marcus runs into an
alley, the same alley that the two sisters were walking through, but by that
time the sisters had run across the street in a desperation attempt to make it
home after hearing shots.

However, the street that the sisters ran across was directly in the path
of where Malcolm chose to run, and the shots that are intended for Malcolm from
Rock's gun hits one of the sisters. When Rock sees this, he stops shooting, but
one of his peers continues to shoot, one that he would later on find out has a
trigger-happy problem. This peer hits the other sister, but unlike the first
sister who was hit and died instantly, the second sister dies slowly, and even
after she falls this peer continues to shoot, attempting to hit Malcolm. Rock
yells out at him, and tells him to stop shooting, and the both of them run back
to their vehicle and find that the other peer had already been waiting there.

Rock asks that peer if he got Marcus, and he says no. Nothing was
accomplished. Rock drives back home angrily, realizing that this is going to
cause a shitstorm in all types of places.

Somewhere in between the first bullet and the last bullet, a phone rings
at the police department; someone has reported a drive-by shooting. Black and
whites appear at the scene of the shooting in minutes but are left only with
the ending of the tale. There is blinking from the police car lights and from
the traffic lights. The entire police department also sees the shitstorm that
is coming their way. They can tell from the surrounding clues around the death
of these two girls that this happened because of the lack of concern to what
drugs is doing to their city. A couple of days after this incident, it would be
decided that the two cops who were arguing before would be partnered up, even
though one was from homicide and one was from narcotics.

The car door says "Shut" again, and when I look out my window
I see Lynne getting into that same damn car she got in last time to go away
with Silvio. Does Silvio make her happy.

I've heard that womens' hearts beat faster than mens', probably because
women tend to be less powerful physically, but regardless of if that is true or
not, one might like to think that a woman's heart beats faster because, in a
metaphorical sense, the search for love tends to be more powerful in women than
in men. Seeing Lynne drive off with Silvio, it makes me believe that she is
capable of doing anything for love, even if it means being psychologically and
physically abused. I only hope she doesn't become number two-hundred and
sixty-six.

Suddenly my door opens and I see Tao making his way in, a bit slower
than he usually does. "Your door was a bit opened."

Make yourself at home, my place of residence is your place of residence.
"I love this couch." So do I. What do you want? Tao is now talking,
telling me why he came here, and it appears as if he is saying that he knows
how much of an annoyance he can be, and that he will stop coming to my place of
residence unannounced. That he will be the polite neighbor that he should have
always been.

"Yeah blah blah blah. Why don't you start by paying me back for all
the food you've eaten here." Tao begins to laugh, "I'm serious,
man." Now he's noticing that my right thumb is red, and he asks me if I
cut myself. I look down at my thumb and realize it's beginning to bleed again.
This damn superficial cut that won't heal.

"It somewhat healed a while back, but it never fully heals."
Tao tells me that he bets the cut has turned into the shape of a circle. I look
at it, and notice that he is right. "Circles are common throughout
nature," he tells me. Tao begins to say "Did you know that" but
I stop him mid-sentence because as interested as I may be, I know he will be
here for thirty more minutes if I let him continue. Tao goes back to his
apartment, but before he leaves he says "dictum meum pactum." He claims
to me that his word is his bond.

About fifteen minutes later I leave my apartment, go down the first
flight of stairs and then down the second flight that leads into the basement
of the apartment building where my clothes are being washed. There I find Mary,
who is also washing her clothes. She looks in my direction but doesn't entirely
look directly at me. I go to the washer that houses my clothes, and there is
nothing but silence from either of us.

I notice that she has gained even more weight than the last time Tao
mentioned it. Maybe she just doesn't care anymore. Maybe she got fired and said
"fuck it." She finishes putting all her clothes in her basket and
begins to walk away, and while she's walking away I watch her, and I can't help
but wonder how her brain works. How anyone's brain works.

The triune brain model consists of three parts, the neomammalian complex
which deals with language and perception, the paleomammalian complex which
deals with reproductive and parental behavior, and the reptilian complex which
deals with aggression and dominance displays. Now what I'm wondering is if our
brain is trained to use a specific part of its makeup more-so than others in
accordance to a specific environment. Like social fragments, how we are
different versions of ourselves around different people, I wonder if there are
psychologically fragments, where a part of our brain dominates usage over all
others depending on who or what the subject is.

Mary's social fragment towards me probably tends to stray towards the
"you are just another useless person" personality, and her
psychological fragment probably tends to stray towards the "full of
contempt for you" complex. The funny thing is I know I feel the same way
about her. Not in those words.

Chapter 44:

THE ROSE CITY

Several months ago, I had a dream. I'm in an office room watching a
presentation on a big screen. Who exactly is giving the presentation I am not
sure, it was simply a white shade in the shape of a human body. The white shade
tells me that there was a man who once said that there is nothing in the dark
that isn't there when the lights are on, and then he points to a photograph of
a man covered in darkness.

"This man, like you, has realized that no one ever truly
dies." That's what he says to me, and I try to ask him what he means but I
can't talk because of the bandage over my mouth. Regardless, he tells me that
what he means is that there is no such thing as birth and death here. That
nothing here is real. Now he's taking the bandage off.

The white shade hands me a pistol and tells me to try and kill myself.
In the back of my mind I have a severe desire to die, but as I press the pistol
against my brain, I can't force myself to pull the trigger. "Remember,
this is just a dream." That's what he says to me, but he's not the one
with the gun pressed against his head.

"Kill yourself, and you will see that I am telling you the
truth." I still can't pull the trigger. After the white shade realizes
that I need a bigger push if I'm going to pull this trigger, he starts to talk
about the beginning of the universe.

The white shade asks me if I believe it's possible to create something
from nothing. I tell him that I do not believe that it's possible. Then he
says, "So in order for something to exist, there must have been something
before it." Then he goes on to say that I must be one of the people who
believes that a higher being or beings created all that we see and know.

The white shade says if you cannot create something from nothing, and we
consider this fact, then many will argue the impossible origin of the higher
being or beings in the first place. When you think about it, these ideas in
conjunction are in error.

"So now we consider that the existence of a higher being or beings
is impossible. How can we be here? Did everything and anything we know and see
come into place on its own? Maybe nothing is real. Or, maybe everything and
anything that we know and see are as real or as fake to us as we think. Maybe
if a person simply believes there is a God, then God will simply exist, and if
a person doesn't believe there is a God, then God will simply not exist. Maybe
it's that simple."