Authors: Theodore Sturgeon
She'd leave the door on the latch and put everything where he could see it when he came in, there was a dear,
dear
man, what would she ever do without him? Lance soothed her and said of course he would do it, or anything else his little princess commanded, all she had to do was just give him tiny little hints, she needn't even ask. He said they would meet at the airline terminal in the morning, and added a number of other remarks having much to do with a new life in a new world and little to do with this narrative.
As it turned out, his agreement was impulsive and impractical. It was acutely inconvenient for him to do anything of the kind. He realized this as he set down the phone, and experienced one second of horror at his impracticality. This was followed by a towering disdain for himselfâ
What, call yourself in love? Deny your little princess a little favor just for a little inconvenience?
His pendulum swung violently to the other extreme. He jammed his hat on, snapped one orderâ“Take care of everything, Joe”âat his thunderstruck assistant, and took, not an hour, but the entire day for his princess' small favor.
Once he had accomplished the enormous thing, he ceased to worry or even think about itâperhaps the secret of his considerable successâand, turning his back on chaos, gave himself over to the service of his beloved.
He found the place easily, took the elevator upstairs and went down the narrow corridor to her room. He stood there for a long
moment, lost in emerald mists of reminiscence and shocking-pink clouds of anticipation, then removed his hat and turned the knob. He clicked the lock as he closed the door behind him and stood, smiling fatuously into the sweet disorder of her parting from this chrysalis.
Much of the furniture was gone, and the pieces that were left were all taggedâfor the Salvation Army, for the superintendent, for one or two persons whose names he didn't recognize. In one corner of the room was a tumbled clutter of miscellanyâa scratched tabouret, some pictures with broken frames, a four-foot model of an Eskimo kayak, a mound of books, papers and magazines, dusty curtains, drapes and slip-covers. Tacked to the north wall, strung around the tabouret and tacked again to the west wall, was a piece of twine, forming a sort of fence around this particular jetsam. Hanging from it was a piece of paper folded in half. On the paper, lettered legibly and tersely, were the words THROW OUT.
Piled just inside the door were the things she wanted to keep, from all her past, to take into her life with him. There were the old typewriter and a mahogany caseâthe heirlooms. On top of the case sat a cardboard box, the kind in which one buys a ream of bond paper. It was lettered WIP, which he properly translated as WORK IN PROGRESS.
On this lay the heavy gold-and-leather frame in which he had enshrined his picture,
All my Love, Lance
, and, eclipsing this, was a folded sheet of paper. He picked it up. It read,
Lance, I do love you so, Ellie
.
Although it was hardly inspired copy, it stopped his heart for a giddy moment. Anyone else might read those words as just those wordsâhe heard them in her eager half-whisper.
He was delicately fanned by her long lashes as they swept up on
do
and down on
so
. He knew her special fragrance and even, for a moment, sensed a sort of nearness which was not heat nor odor nor sound, but justânearness. He let his breath whistle through his nostrils and stood there, shaking his head and murmuring her name.
He opened his eyes on the dangling sign which said, so pitilessly, THROW OUT, and for the very first time felt a small curl of regret. She had so submissively agreed to his half-playful dictum to wipe
out the past, that he had never thought of what it might cost her.
He crossed to the twine barrier and ran his gaze over the clutter behind it. He suddenly bent and took up another bond-paper box, also with WIP inscribed upon it. It was dusty and cracked, and written across one corner was
Furilla's Rose
.
Here, he thought, were the worksheets, the carbons, the notesâall the mysterious machine-filings and mold-castings from which a great novel comesâfilings and castings Eloise had lived with, slaved over, hoped and dreamed uponâher second novel. Now, because of his arbitrary whim, they were tossed on a heap with a broken kayak and some dusty drapes, under a sign which commanded THROW OUT.
His passion for her mounted the shoulders of his strange reverence for books, a reverence sometimes encountered in the non-reader, and rose towering over him. He took the box over to the stenographer's chair pushed against the window, sat down with it on his lap, opened it, readâ
Furilla threw back the drapes and let in a rush of dawn, a very shout of ruddy gold. Then, standing before the tall pier-glass, she flung away her robe and made another daybreak, another, rosier morning in the room
.
Yes, it was the famous opening of
Furilla's Rose
. How strange it looked in typescript, in grey-haloed carbon! What currents, what depths flowed and swirled in his kitten-princess!
He leafed on.
“Bitch!” Kane shouted hoarsely, “Youâyou bitch!” His red-rimmed eyes swung close as he bent over her, sitting cool and poised. “Say something, damn you! Can't you hear me?”
“Yes thank you,” said Furilla quietly, “I'll have a crumpet.” She smiled up into his purple, baffled face and added, “Yes, I hear you. The last thing I heard, the last thing a lady could hear, was when you offered me a crumpet.”
That's my Ellie! thought Lance deMarcopolo fondly. If it was ugly, she didn't know it was there until it went away.
He skimmed on, through the tremendous sequence where Furilla met Maserac and went to live in his house. Maserac was an Older Man, and poor Furilla was quite sure that Older Men were safe.
“I'm a very lonely man,” said Maserac, “and to have you in my big old house would be like having the sun shining in all the windows at once.”
“Oh, you mustn't be lonely! I'll come, I'll do everything for you.”
He tilted her heart-shaped face up with his strong old hand and looked piercingly down into her eyes. “Ah, Furillaâdo you know what â¦Â everything â¦Â might mean?”
“Yes, oh yes!” she cried. “You never had a little daughter. I'll be your very own dear little daughter!”
Maserac's hand fell away. “I'm ashamed,” he whispered, “so ashamed!”
That was a close one, thought deMarcopolo admiringly. He turned the leaf over, and a blue slip fell out. He bent and picked it up. It was from a desk memo pad and was imprinted with
Office of the Publisher
. He didn't mean to read it, but he couldn't help it.
It'll be just like having the sun shining in all the windows at once
.
I'll have a cab in front of your place at seven
.
         Â
Your own
               Â
Brill
.
DeMarcopolo sat staring at the paper, holding it between thumb and forefinger, flapping it like a small blue wing. Brill â¦Â Brill? Oh! Brill MacIver!
That
old foolâthe publisher who â¦
He shook himself, or shuddered, then set the box down on the floor. He got up and took off his topcoat and draped it over the back of the chair, then sat down again. He put the box back on his lap.
He didn't skim it lightly now, though he didn't know why. He went rapidly through the sheets.
He got to that scene between Furilla and young Harald. Harald had come into Furilla's life “like a great storm” and, in a famous sequence, there had been a stormâa beaut. It built and built outside, glaring and crashing, silhouetting Harald against its lightning flashes as he climbed in her window. It built and built still more as he pressed closer and closer to Furilla, until, when he reached her, the clouds rolled and the thunder banged and, at lastâ
zing!â
a mighty flash burned down the boathouse.
Just here, a paperclip separated some pages from the main manuscript. It was the scene when, next morning, Furilla awoke, alone, bruised, strangely disturbed, and considered what she was to do.
She rose, trembling, and ran to the mirror. A dream, a dreamâsurely it was a wonderful, terrible dream! But noâthere in the smooth hollow between shoulder and neck, lay the mark of the beast. “Oh!” she cried, herself to her heart. “Oh wonderful, wonderful beast!”
“Maserac!” she screamed
.
The sound of her own voice frightened her. She cast about wildly, like a frightened animal, then ran to the wardrobe and threw on the lamé hostess gown. When the old man opened the door, she stood like a pillar of gold, her hair, her eyes aflame
.
“Maserac, Maserac, he loves me!” she sang
.
And she told him, told him all of it, each syllable bringing her closer to the joy she knew he would feel for her, for her love, for the life she had begun with Harald. And, when she had finished, she ran to him, held his shoulders. “Maserac, isn't it wonderful?”
“Isn't it wonderful?” he repeated, and cold shock ran through her at the knell of his voice. “Poor, poor little bird!”
“What? Why do you say that, why?”
“Dear little Furilla, don't you know that true love doesn't come like a storm? It grows like a flower, unseen, until suddenly it's there, blooming.”
She recoiled from him. “IâI thought you'd be glad for me, for Harald and me. I love him, love him, do you hear? And I'm glad, glad!”
Lance deMarcopolo sat quite still, his eyes on the manuscript but not doing anything. He remembered the scene, but that was not the way it had happened in the book.
He uttered a soft, puzzled grunt and turned the page. Under it, lay a pink flimsy with some single-spaced typescript on it. He knew that Ellie used pink second-sheets for her correspondence, white for her work. This must be the copy of a letter to somebody, and perhaps heâbut before he could have any doubts about it, his quick eye had taken it in.
Hennigar, Hennigar, Hobart Hennigarâit's like music. Oh Hobie, Hobie, I've been thinking of you, missing you tho' it's been only an hour now, thinking about the wonderful love we have, the wonderful life we shall share. Hurry back to me, my darling. I do love you so
.
I do love you so
. A numb place existed suddenly in the pit of Lance's stomach. He did not permit himself to think. He went on to the next sheetâan original, typed with a heavy hand and a pale ribbon on a piece of business stationery with the letterhead torn off.
Got your note. Been thinking too, especially since I got it. You can't be serious, Ellie. Don't tell me you fell for that guff I was handing you. I don't know what you thought, but I thought I was kidding, talking like those knights-in-armor in your lousy novel. Charades, you know. As for what else happened, why not? Fun's fun
.
I'm sorry if this hurts you, but I can't get myself tangled up in anything like this right now, or ever, and it's only right to tell you so, once and for all. I have to say it againâyou can't be serious! Orâdo you really believe people do things like in your book? H
.
I shouldn't
, thought deMarcopolo in panic.
This has nothing to do with â¦
But he went on to the next oneâanother pink carbon.
Brill dear, I'll just leave this where you'll find it when you get there, I can't face you now. I'm going back to town. I wish I were dead. I needn't be dead, I've been killed, killed! Last night, while you were in the city, Hobart Hennigar did what you tried to warn me aboutânow I know, now I understand, when it's too late. I found out this afternoon
.
Brill, he talked to me the way I've always dreamed a man should talk to a woman. He was â¦Â I thought he was so wonderful, and before I knew it, it was too late. And now I know what he really is, it was all a game to him, and he tells me he thought it was all a game to me, too. I despise myself, Brill dear, but Hennigarâoh! If I were a man, I'd kill him, for he's murdered a most precious part of me. Ellie
.
Next was an imprinted office memo, headed
Office of the Publisher
. Typed by a firm, even hand, were a few lines, which deMarcopolo read without hesitation.
Ellie, come back. I've got to talk to you about this. Don't worry. It will be all right. But come backâyou worry me
.
DeMarcopolo shook his head rapidly, like a man swimming up out of consciousness, and then went back to his reading. Again, it was manuscript. Same scene, butâoh!â¦
She rose, trembling, and ran to the mirror. A dream, a dream, surely it was a terrible, terrible dream! But noâthere in the smooth hollow between shoulder and neck, lay the mark of the beast. Oh! she cried, herself to her heart. Oh beast, wicked, brutal beast!
“Maserac!”
she screamed. The sound of her own voice frightened her. She cast about wildly, like a frightened animal, then ran to the wardrobe and
threw on the gold lamé hostess gown. When the old man opened the door, she stood like a pillar of fire, her hair, her eyes aflame
.
“Maserac, Maserac, he's killed me!”
And she told him, told him all of it, each syllable torn from her, agonizing, yet strangely eager, for each syllable brought her closer to the comfort, the strength, protectionâall wrongs avengedâwhich she knew her dear friend would have for her. And, when at last she had finished, she ran to him, blind with tears, and grasped his shoulders
.
“He ought to be killed, killed, for what he's done!”
“It's terrible, terrible!” Cold shock ran through her at the sound of his voice, for here was no anger, no protecting arm. Here was only an uneasy laugh. He said, “Butâperhaps it isn't so bad.”
“What? Why do you say that, why?”
“Dear little Furilla, I know it hurtsâbut it always hurts to learn something important. You have been safe with meâonly when you turned away from me, did anything hurt you
.
Now you knowânow, thanks to him, you can turn to me, be with me, be safe forever, with never a new temptation or hurt.”
“Killed!” she cried, “he has to be killed for what he did to me!”
“My dear child,” said Maserac, as slowly his arms came about her. “My dear, my dear ⦔
“No, no!” and she pushed away from him. “He must be punished, he must be destroyed, or there can be no more Furilla, no more for you, no more, even, for me ⦔