American Wife (7 page)

Fallujah at the time was a stronghold for mujahedeen and other Sunni terrorists and insurgent groups who wanted to topple the Iraqi government and get rid of the Americans. Things had changed dramatically for the worse in Iraq in the year and a half since Chris first deployed there.

People forget that in 2003, most Iraqis actually welcomed the Americans—they hated Saddam. There were terrorists, as well as an underground resistance composed of his loyalists, but they were a distinct minority and relatively disorganized. Even troops coming into a place like Mosul—a stronghold of Saddam's former political party and tribe—were welcomed with cheers from the majority of the populace.

Now the population was disillusioned. Most didn't hate Americans, but they weren't willing to show any sort of enthusiasm for fear of being killed. At the same time, the new Iraq government hadn't delivered on its promises. Corruption was rampant throughout the government, though incompetence was even worse.

Saddam's former backers had joined forces with al-Qaeda-backed terrorists and others dedicated to killing Americans. In the east and around Baghdad, Shia militias—mostly supported by Iran—were also pressing to get rid of Americans and force the new government to do their bidding. The civilian population was caught in the middle. Americans like Chris were tasked to protect them by hunting down the worst of the terrorists, but it was an immense task.

Fallujah had become a terrorist stronghold. It was most notorious as the place where American contract workers were hung from a bridge in March 2004. There were many other atrocities, mostly against fellow Iraqis. By the time the Marines began an assault to retake the city that November, it was an armed camp of terrorists and their families; the neutral civilians had fled.

Chris and other snipers provided what was known as overwatch, striking the enemy from a distance as they came to attack the Americans or Iraqis. The snipers would take up a position and then scan the distance in front of the Marines as the American troops advanced street by street. Spotting terrorists running to attack, weapons in hand, they would shoot them down.

Chris excelled at the job. He was a very good shot, very calm, and keenly observant: “good on the gun,” the SEALs called it. Word of his prowess spread through the troops on the ground; he quickly earned a reputation, which would eventually earn him the nickname “Legend.” Originally coined as a joke by fellow SEALs, the name stuck among the men Chris was protecting, and even the SEALs quickly came to use it with reverence.

While Chris obviously had great skills, he took pains to tell others that he wasn't the best sniper in the Teams, let alone the U.S. military. Instead, he said his high kill count came mostly from the situations he was in. There were simply a lot of enemy combatants coming at him. It was, as the military would term it, a “target-rich environment.”

To put that another way, a heck of a lot of people wanted to kill him and the other Americans in Fallujah.

As Chris details in
American Sniper,
the terrorists eventually caught on to the overwatch strategy and stopped coming out on the street. At that point, Chris decided to go down to be with the Marines. Even though it wasn't his job—and he probably would have gotten in trouble at the time had his superiors known—he thought it was the best way to protect them.

That was also pure Chris. Part of the reason was that he wanted to be where the action was. And another part was that he was a natural-born protector. Just as he'd stood up for kids in the high school cafeteria, he was sticking up for Marines and Iraqis now—though with higher stakes. He felt he could do more to protect them if he was going into the houses with them.

I didn't know that much about what was going on in Fallujah or the rest of Iraq. While I had a general fear that Chris might be hurt or worse, that fear was largely theoretical. I tried to focus on the blessings and not allow fear to take over, even though it was constantly bubbling under the surface. Being a new mother helped. I had plenty of other things to think about.

In fact, I didn't know how much Chris had done in Fallujah until he came home. We were at a car wash place one day when someone overheard his name called and went up to him.

“Are you Chris Kyle?” asked the man. His haircut and build made it clear he was military.

“Yes.”

“I was in Fallujah,” said the young man, who turned out to be a Marine. “You saved my life.”

“Ya'll saved my ass plenty of times, too,” said Chris, referring to Marines.

Others came over, including the father of one of the Marines. He had tears in his eyes when he shook Chris's hand.

“Your husband saved my son's life,” he said to me. “Thank you.”

What an incredibly small world it is, I thought. For all of these people to have been together so far away, and now just meet by chance in the oddest place.

Or was it part of a cosmic plan? A way of showing Chris that he was appreciated?

I felt proud of him, but I also felt sadness—I imagined being the parent of one of these young men, worried about their welfare and yet unable to do anything to protect them. It was an impotence with few parallels.

Chris just took it all in stride, smiling and waving as he left to get the car.

AN EMAIL MARRIAGE

Being a mother and wife was only part of who I was. I was a sales manager for a pharmaceutical company as well. Eventually, maternity leave would end, and I'd have to go back to work. As the date approached, I began to rethink those plans. I wanted to stay home with my son.

“It's up to you,” said Chris. We'd been able to put money away while I was working, and while we would have to cut back on many things, we calculated that we could get by on just Chris's salary, thanks to his recent promotions and specialty pay. Granted, it would take careful budgeting, but it was doable.

After a lot of thought, I decided I couldn't leave Bubba. I called my boss. She was a lot more understanding than I'd hoped.

“We're trying to be more family friendly,” she said. “You can be a prototype for a part-time salesperson. We'll prorate your salary. You'll work part-time while your kids are young, then go back to full-time.”

It sounded like a great compromise. I agreed to try. In fact, I was excited to give it a shot.

I hired a really good friend to watch Bubba on the days when I had to work.

Chris was able to email and call more regularly as his deployment went on. We talked about family things; the war rarely intruded.

I happen to have some of his emails from later in that deployment, so you can see for yourself:

February 17, 2005 7:12 a.m.

Hey baby, I just wanted to let you know that I am okay, and safe. I've been working a lot lately. Right now we happen to be on a base with internet so I wanted to give you a note. I am so sorry I wasn't able to call, at least for Valentine's Day. I love you so very much, and miss the hell out of you. I think I might be able to call later tonight for me, this afternoon for you. I hope all is going well with you, and you're not too worried. I've been thinking about you non-stop. I want to ask how you and Bubba are doing but I probably won't be able to check my email again for a while. Just take care of yourself, and know that I am thinking of you always, and sending my love. You mean the world to me. I love you, sexy woman, with my heart and soul!

—XOXOXOXOXOXXXXXXXOXOXOXXOX

February 22, 2005

I am so happy that you feel so comfortable with the fact that H— is watching Bubba. I do love to hear all the things that go on with him, even if it's just his shit. I really miss you. It's been even worse because of the fact that I haven't been able to talk to you. I've been working a lot. Now I am back with the platoon for a little bit out west. We will probably stay out here now. The phone situation is gonna suck. The only phones are pay phones, and they are always full. The only other option is the sat phone, but I have to be with the platoon to use it. I should be able to call you tonight. I miss you so much, and can't wait for you to wrap your arms, legs, and lips around me. I think I will probably do the same in return. Maybe. Just kidding. You will be begging for some time away from me. I will smother you with all my attention. I can't wait to see you. I love you so much. I really am madly, head over heels, in love with you. I don't know what I would do without you.

Right now the rumor on leaving is the latest the 22nd, but I am still supposed to leave on the first. Hopefully. I want to get home to see my baby and my son. I miss both of y'a'll something awful. Time is going a little faster now because of working again. I had a long enough break and it's about time I got back out. I'm still making a name for myself by adding to my numbers. I know I never say it, but it does feel good to have all the people talking about me in a good way. Anyway, I love you and miss you. You mean the world to me. Please take care of yourself and I will call you soon. Smoooooooooch!!!!! I can't wait to give you a real one. Carefully go over every inch of your body. I am soooo horny! I love you, baby!

—XOXOXOXOXXXXX

Chris was hoping to come home that March; in fact, he wouldn't leave until well into April.

By now he'd gained quite a bit of fame within the military community. He was mentioned as a possible recipient of the Grateful Nation Award given by the Jewish Institute for National Security Affairs (JINSA) in recognition of his efforts in the War on Terror. He didn't get the award that year—he would later on—but he didn't seem overly disappointed. That was the way he was about all his commendations: he really didn't care whether he was recognized by the “head shed” (or higher-ups). He didn't fight for medals; he fought for his brothers-in-arms.

March 26, 2005

Hey baby. What's up? Same ol' shit here. I found out I didn't get that Jewish award. They gave it to an officer. They thought that would look better. Oh well, they needed to spread it out like I told you. You'll be happy to hear our missions are slowing down. Probably because it's getting close to going home, and the CO doesn't want any more casualties. So we are bored. I miss you so bad, gorgeous. When we fly in we get the first three days off to stay at home free of charge, and then come in to download the pallets. Once that's done, we can take leave for a month. Yeahhhhhhhhh! I need to go, just wanted to give you a hi and I love you (the mostest)!

March 28, 2005

I am so ready to be home I have already gone into autopilot mode. Just counting the days, waiting for that big bird to take me home. I am sorry to hear that you are not feeling good. Hopefully getting off the pill will help. Hopefully when I get home I can help with your emotions. Whatever you need, just tell me. I want to make things easy for you when I am home. At least as easy as possible. I love you so much gorgeous. Glad to hear your dad has busted his ass to help us out so much. We are so lucky with our family, I couldn't have married into a better one. Not to mention couldn't have married a better woman, cause there is none better. I also got an email from your niece. It was a PowerPoint slide that was real cute. It had a green background with a frog, and said she missed me. Sweet, huh. If she didn't forward a copy to you, I can. Oh, about the birth control: You said you wanted ten kids anyway. Change your mind yet? What is Bubba doing that has changed? Is he being a fart or is he just full of energy? I'm sure when I get home you will be ready for a break. How about after I get to see you for a little while, you go to a spa for a weekend to be pampered? I REALLY think you deserve it. You've been going and going, kinda like the Energizer Bunny. Just like when I get home for sex, we keep going and going and going and going and, you get the point. Hopefully you at least smiled over that. I always want you to be happy, and want to do whatever it takes to make it happen. Even if it means buying a Holstein cow. Yuk! That's big time love. Wow. I hope you have a good day, and can find time in the day to rest. I love you more than you will ever know.

Smooooooch!

—XOXOOXOXOXOXOXOX

Even part-time, work ate at my nerves. Frustrated, needing and wanting him home both for selfish and unselfish reasons, I occasionally unloaded on Chris. Communicating by email and sometimes phone was no substitute for having him there.

Yet he tried. One of my cousins was having trouble with her new horse. My cowboy husband counseled her on how to treat it. Mostly, it was a matter of patience and wearing the horse down. “It will take time no matter what you do,” he told her. “Some of our horses wouldn't let us touch their feet until we actually rode them. When you ride them you can get them really tired and trusting you.”

Some of that advice applies to people, too.

April 13, 2005

It was so nice to be able to talk to you tonight. I miss you something terrible. I can't wait to be with you again, especially the truck ride home while I am teasing the hell out of you. Yea! I love you so much baby. About the computer, how much is too much for a new computer? I got an email through eBay that a guy is willing to sell me that computer I wanted because the winning bidder didn't pay up, but he wants 2500 for it. I know when I get something in my head that I want, I usually don't care too much about the price, so I want a sanity check. The computer is an Alienware computer with 2 gigs of ram and 120 gigs of hard drive. It's top of the line, but is it too much? I know you can bring me back to earth if I am over-anxious. Anyway, I love you so much, baby. I will call you again tomorrow night for me, day for you. Take care of yourself and think about the ride home!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Chris did end up buying that computer, which was a fairly hot gaming rig at the time. He played mostly sports games on the PC and consoles, and while he tried the original Call of Duty series, it was never among his favorites.

After roughly four months of work, I couldn't stand leaving Bubba anymore. It was an effort to get into the car. I felt as if I was abandoning my son, especially since his dad was still away. Finally, after a few months, I just had to give up and became a full-time mom.