Allegiance (35 page)

“Glad I’m memorable.” He frowned. “Of course it was you … You think I would’ve forgotten something like that?” His eyes widened suggestively as they grazed my body, setting my cheeks on fire again. “God, Evie. I know you’re worried about this Tribe thing, but relax a little bit!” He leaned in to graze the side of my face with his hand. “Sofie will fix it.” I froze, unsure of how to respond to his affections without hurting him. He leaned in and pressed his mouth against my ear, sending shivers through my body. “I miss you …”

I couldn’t help it. I slinked back, my body as stiff as a corpse with the unsolicited closeness. Turning to Mage, I whispered, “I don’t know which is worse …”

Her face smoothed over. “Definitely the alternative.”

Bishop’s charcoal eyes shifted from Mage to me, narrowing slightly. “What are you talking about? First, Amelie … now you. Why does it feel there’s a giant secret that I’m not a part of?”

Oh, but you are part of it, Bishop. You’re at the center of it …
We needed to be more careful. I needed to distract him.

“No secrets,” I said, smiling as I forced myself to reach forward and pat his knee. I held the box up in front of me. “Thanks for this. I’ll be sure to model it for Max later,” I offered with a sly wink, trying to make light of the situation.

Bishop made a stabbing motion to his chest. With a deep groan, he fell to the floor with dramatic flare. If my flippant rebuff wounded him, I couldn’t tell. Either way, his focus was off the secret.

I glanced over my shoulder, hoping to find Caden lingering in a corner. No one but Wraith stared back. My shoulders sagged.
Where could he be?

“Here’s another one. From Amelie.” Mage shoved a large box in my face, temporarily distracting me from the inner turmoil that must’ve been splayed across my face.
Oh, Amelie
… I peeled the wrapping to reveal an oversized brown shoebox. Inside was a beautiful pair of soft brown leather riding boots, similar to the pair I’d brought to her on Ratheus. As I admired them, I noticed a narrow inner pocket. Hmm … Sliding the boots on over my jeans, I tested my dagger’s fit in one of the pockets. “Perfect!”

Bishop snorted. “You think you’re ready for war now?” When he processed the severity of his words, the grin slipped off his face. He picked up my diamond pendant from its box, and tossed it up and down as if were loose change. “I hope it never comes to that.”

“It’s only a matter of time, isn’t it?” I whispered sadly. Would it be before or after I miraculously freed Veronique? Before or after I turned into a jaundice-eyed freak? Before or after Caden told me to drop dead?

Caden …

I searched the room again.
Where the hell was he? I need to explain, damn it!
Just five minutes to talk openly, freely, without guarding my words, without onlookers.
Impossible …
The word became real as I spotted my dark-haired warden loitering in the shadows. Watching me. Always watching.

I folded my face into my hands, the urge to scream overwhelming. I wanted to run as fast as I could; through the door, into the snow, into freedom. Would Wraith chase me? Would I have five minutes to myself so I could drop to my knees and pound the earth, to pity myself, to plead with God or the Fates or whomever was running the show up there? So freaking ironic. Before, I was disappointed that Caden couldn’t turn me. Now, all I wanted to do was remain human. Was that too much to ask?

I stood, bile churning the meager contents of my belly, and moved toward the hall. Wraith was instantly on guard, mirroring my steps. “Bathroom,” I grumbled, my irritation growing with each second. I anticipated the upcoming argument.

As expected, he barged into the bathroom to inspect it, shoving me out of the way. “It is empty,” he announced.

“Wow. If this grim reaper gig doesn’t pan out for you, you could always take over for Sherlock Holmes.”

“I do not understand your suggestion.”

“Of course you don’t,” I pushed past him with a loud snort.

“I will wait outside,” he added, unfazed by my snippy attitude. That only made me feel guilty. He was doing his job. He stepped out and turned his back to me. I shut the door and flipped on the fan, wanting added background noise given I had an audience.

Finally, alone
.
The treacherous girl with more deadly secrets than the Secret Service, deceiving her way through her days, misleading those she cares about most. All for the greater good.
I had no right to get angry with any of them ever again! Everything they were doing was for the greater good of something. Whether it coincided with keeping me alive or not was irrelevant.

I sighed, my hands rubbing my eyes fiercely. “Caden, where are you …” I whispered, more acutely aware of the emptiness in my chest than ever before.

A slight breeze kissed my cheek and then a hand fastened onto my elbow and yanked me backward into darkness. My jaw dropped, a blood-curdling scream rising in my lungs but someone’s palm muzzled me, stifling it.

“Shhh …” I heard, the source only an inch from my ear. It was enough for me to identify Caden, though. All of my anxiety expelled with a breath.

“Shhh,” he warned again, his proximity all the more intense in pitch dark.

I nodded slowly. His hand slipped from my mouth. “Where are we?” I whispered, pawing through the murkiness , my fingertips grazing cold rock behind and in front of me. The space was narrow and held a musty chill. “In the secret passageway,” I answered for myself, suddenly remembering. I waited for him to acknowledge my guess, to say something. Anything.

But Caden wasn’t speaking. Dread tore away at my insides.
This is it. He’s going to tell me he hates my guts
. Or… I ran into the wall as I took a step back, feeling my eyes widen in sudden alarm. He was a vampire and he was angry and jealous. I had already experienced an angry, jealous vampire earlier. She tried to kill me. And now I was in a dark, hidden passage with another one …

My hands trembled, my heart pounded in terror. Was Caden about to kill me?

There was a moment’s pause where I couldn’t find a single appropriate word, fear swallowing me whole. Then too many words started tumbling out all at once. “Nothing happened between Julian and me! I swear it. I—”

My words died with a hard swallow as his hands found their place on my shoulders, pinning me against the wall. His mouth trailed lightly over my cheek, my ear, down to my neck, setting fire to my body.
Speak, Caden! Say something! Please!
But he remained silent. Not a word. It was the most unbearable form of torture.

And in that torture, my spirit, my resolve, my everything broke. “It’s okay, Caden. It’s probably for the best. I’ll be dead in a few days, anyway,” I sobbed, hot tears streaming down my cheeks, a flood of angst and heartache splintering the dam that had kept me together up until now. “Just know that I tried my best to do the right thing. But there’s no way. Someone always gets hurt. I’m so sorry it was you this time. I still lo—”

Caden’s mouth suddenly covered mine, ending all words, all thought. All ability to breathe. Pressing his body against mine, the level of self-control I had come to know about Caden disintegrated, his lips consuming mine with a new level of hunger. Not even my injured jaw mattered anymore. Caden was what I wanted. This was what I’d wished for. And this was probably the last time I’d ever have him.

Taking pleasure in the taste of his lips, I let my hands wander over his chest to his arms, memorizing every ridge, every muscle. Sliding up to his shoulders, my fingertips pressed into the deep ridges of his collarbone. With a groan, his fingers began to snake through my hair until they were tangled up near my scalp. Clenching his fists, causing a small bite of pain, his mouth slid to my neck. I let my head fall back, gasping with abandon, sinking further and further into Caden’s passion, drowning in him.

“Take me away from here,” I pleaded hoarsely. And suddenly I was cradled in Caden’s arms and we were moving. Running in darkness, running to freedom, away from Wraith, away from Bishop. Away, together. I burrowed my face in his chest, relishing the fleeting moment. I knew it was wrong, I knew it was dangerous, and yet it was the perfect last wish granted before I fully morphed. And died.

Biting cold seized my body as we burst out of the secret passage and into daylight. Through the blizzard conditions, up and down hills, with me in his arms as if I weighed nothing, Caden continued running at that impossible speed that only his kind could manage. I didn’t care where he was taking me. I didn’t care about the cold. I buried my face in his soft sweater, inhaling his clean musky smell. Bliss.

Abruptly, the harsh wind vanished, replaced by a smoky aroma and a crackling fire. Caden lowered me down onto a cushion of blankets and furs. With arms on either side of my head, he hovered over me, gazing down at me with those intense jade irises that I wanted to bind myself to forever. I had no idea where we were. I didn’t care, my eyes marveling over this being in front of me. My body trembled beneath him. I reached a tentative hand up to trace the line of his jaw. Quick, raspy breaths escaped my parted lips, creating a cloud in the still frigid air.

“You were worth waiting seven hundred years for,” he whispered, his words unraveling my last shred of self-control.

***

A faded, timeworn glass pane revealed the horrendous winter scene outside. I shuddered with the sight, quickly pushing it aside in favor of sheer ecstasy. Enfolded in countless blankets, reveling in Caden’s arms, my cheek resting against his bare chest, I let my eyes roam through the small building for the first time. “What is this place?”

“Looks like an outpost on the back of the property,” Caden answered. “I found it the other day. They probably used it for hunting. I don’t think anyone’s stepped inside here for fifty years.”

I could see what he meant. A hovel of wood planks, the shack’s roof was caving in and riddled with holes, allowing enough snow through to form a thin layer over three quarters of the space. Aside from walls to buffer the wind, a simple woodstove in one corner provided the only comfort. Without it, we may as well be laying outside in the snow bank.

“They won’t think to look out here for a while,” he whispered, his hand smoothing over my forehead.

I shifted forward so we were chest to chest and stared down at his beautiful face, adoration swelling inside me. And yet sadness too. The corners of his eyes pulled downward and underneath them was slightly purplish. Weariness crept into his features. I’d never seen Caden look worn out before.

“I’m so sorry that I put you through all that, Caden,” I whispered, squeezing my eyes shut before a fresh batch of tears spilled out. I didn’t want to cry. Not now. Not after …

“Hush,” Caden lifted his head enough to plant the gentlest kiss on the corner of my mouth. When he lay back down, his mouth twitched into a smile. “So you let me believe that you guys—”

“I’m sorry!” I cried, burying my face in shame. “I didn’t know what else to do!”

His arms enclosed around my naked back, pulling my face into the crook of his neck. “I would have done the same thing, Eve.”

“Really? Why?”

He shrugged. “There was no other way to explain why you seemed so guilty and you couldn’t tell any of us without risk to your friend. I get it, Eve …” His fingers traced circles over my shoulders and down my spine. “You’ve gotten pretty good at lying, you know.” My stomach churned, suddenly nauseated. But then strong hands slid down to sit on my thighs, instantly sparking renewed excitement. “You’ll make a good vamp when Sofie figures this all out.”

And out of nowhere, a heavy cloud obscured my happiness. Nausea. Elation. Despair. My emotions, bound to a yo-yo.

“I wouldn’t hold out hope,” I muttered.

“I have to,” he whispered, lifting his hands to caress my cheek. “I can’t last without you. I don’t want to …”

I pressed my ear against his heart, dreaming about what it sounded like when Caden had been human. Solid and strong, like he was.

A hand ruffled my hair. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have brought it up. I don’t want to spoil this for you.” He kissed the top of my head. We lay in silence for a long moment as I luxuriated in the feel of my skin against his.

“Nice boots,” he said out of the blue.

I glanced over to my clothes, strewn across the floor. “A gift from Amelie. She put them under the tree before she tried to kill me …”

“Hmm … maybe you should put them on. Now.”

I couldn’t stop the whine from creeping into my voice. “I don’t want to go back there yet.”

“We don’t have to just yet …”

“Well, then …” I lifted my head to look at him. “Why do you want me dressed?” A tiny but fierce spark of insecurity grabbed hold.

Flames danced in his pupils. “I don’t want you dressed. I just want you to put your boots on.”

“Oh!” Heat exploded in my cheeks. “Well …” Two could play this game. Taking a deep breath, casting away all timidity, I stretched out to grab one, goosebumps instantly flaring over my entire body from the chill. Sliding my hand inside the boot’s inner pocket, I pulled out the dagger.

“They’re perfect for hiding things.” I held the knife to Caden’s neck in a teasing way. “Put out or else.”

With a throaty chuckle, he leaned in, letting the blade push into the tender skin of his neck. My hand recoiled, my face marred with horror. That earned a bellow of laughter. “I’m definitely questioning my choice in Christmas gifts now,” he said, peeling my fingers from the handle. He pulled me back down against him forcefully.