Advancing ((Advance Industries #2)) (17 page)

How do I prove otherwise? How do I show her what the rest of us see? What the rest of us know as fact about her?

I never digested what she said really at the time. I was so focused on getting her to stay but she warned me, she was telling me how she felt and I ignored it.
“You stay with me and you’ll never be happy. This last week has shown me what I’m capable of doing to you and I can’t risk breaking you again because it breaks me too.”

She won’t tell me her true feelings because she doesn’t want me to push her away again. She’s scared for so many different reasons and trying to stay strong. She’s petrified to embrace what she’s feeling, she doesn’t want to hurt me again and she’s keeping it all inside.

I really fucked her over with my actions. I’ve caused her to close up, not completely but she’s built walls to protect herself. Walls she had up when we first met, they took time and patience to dismantle but this time, I’m going to knock them down in one foul swoop. I’m going to smother her in love, she’s going to realise how worthy she is if it’s the last thing I do. Resolution sets in and I’m determined with an unwavering finality that I’ll get my girl back, the whole her, not the shell she keeps retreating to, not the ‘I can handle anything’ mask she wears to throw others off the scent. She hides behind that beautiful smile so no one can see how broken she really is. At times even I forget, she’s lived a life so horrendous and she’s so good at talking the talk but her past is with her every day, it’s always there, how could it not be? Growing up the way she did, for the purposes she did, can’t be shrugged off. Just because I forget doesn’t mean she will, can or should. All she’s ever known is loss, the loss of friends, of her identity, her free will. She regained control so fleetingly only to have me take it away again. I made her feel the same way they did and it makes me sick. How could I do that? Why does she keep giving me another chance? I’m a prick. I’ve been a complete bastard to her. Guilt settles deep in my gut. I have to prove myself to her all over again, she needs to know that whatever happens I’ll never turn her away, I’ll never despise her or blame her. I
have
lost her trust, her belief in me to keep her heart safe and that guts me but now I’ve figured it out I can make it right.

Operation Deserving Faith starts right now.

I mould myself against her still naked body and feel the heat radiating off her. My fingers instinctively go to her stomach and even without the feel of a bump I can’t stop myself from stroking it. I’m just as scared as her. I’ve done a crap job at looking after Faith, will I be any better at protecting a child? I fall asleep nestled against her and dreaming of all the ways I can prove myself. All the ways I can
improve
myself.

The following morning, I reluctantly peel myself away, get dressed quickly and head outside zipping up the tent behind me. I busy myself with collecting logs to use as seating and firewood and position them around the blazing campfire.

I’m soon joined by the other guys and we sit around shooting the shit. Talking about what’s next, how exactly we’re gonna fuck Advance Industries over. Planning this is hard knowing we have no Comms to contact each other when we get separated but we’ll make it work. After my realisation last night, I’m more determined than ever to take them down, no one should have been left the first time but shit happens.

“I have working Comms.”

I turn to see Faith taking the log seat at my side and I lean into her. “Good morning, beautiful.”

She narrows her eyes. She was probably expecting me to be pissed over last night, holding a grudge, brooding but I’m not. I keep grinning at her and eventually she smiles back. “Is it?” She asks coyly.

“Hell yeah baby. Today is gonna be a great day.”

“Okay. You’re very chipper this morning,” she says.

“I wonder why.” Cal pipes up, grinning. Walker smacks his arm and shoots him a warning look but Cal, as usual, is oblivious. “Not a lot of sleep was had last night by any of us... Because of you. I thought you were into gagging, Man?” He says to me.

Faith is bright red and shifts uncomfortably. I’m pissed he’d embarrass her that way but I’m trying to be better and I know he only does so because he sees her as one of the guys. I shake my head at him. “You dirty fuck. Did it get you off, Cal? Did you learn something? You still haven’t learnt to think before you speak!”

“Fuck off. It was over before I had a chance to stroke off. I was gonna offer you some pointers on lasting longer.”

Rage, sheer rage that he’d have the audacity to say that he was gonna stroke off listening to my girl’s pleasure. Joking aside there are some things you don’t say and things you definitely don’t say while the woman in question is sat squirming uncomfortably while he talks about our sex life. I tried I really did, I gave him a comeback, an out and he should have accepted it and kept quiet, he just has to push his fucking luck. I jump to my feet, my fists clenched tightly at my sides, he’s not looking at me, he has no idea what’s coming his way as he stares into the fire and keeps talking. The others have averted their eyes and are near to wincing for Cal.

Faith touches my arm and I stop moving. Her cheeks are still flushed but more of a tinged pink now than beet red. She shakes her head and stands, moving in front of me.

“Cal.” He looks up at her. “There are definitely things you need to learn so feel free to listen to us every night. Lap. It. Up because the next time a girl fakes it with you, you’ll know she’s doing so. And while we’re at it learn some respect. You jealous? Been a while since you had any, right? If I could bottle the sensation he gives me Cal, I would - for you, because you’d never need an orgasm again. Do you even know how to use it without your hand being wrapped around it?”

For the first time, since I’ve known him, he’s quiet. Deadly quiet, he’s seething but embarrassed by being taken down a peg or two by my girl. It’s fucking hilarious and the other guys are grinning wildly too. She’s a fucking powerhouse, surprising me constantly. She’s hiding again, her embarrassment hidden by her stream of indigence. She’s laying into him with words to save him from the beating he was gonna have from me. She’s helping him out while putting him straight. She’s a genius!

“Now I know my sex life is interesting as fuck. It’s so, so good, I get why you want to discuss it but... Can we get back to other important things? Or would you like a step by step recount of what he did to make me scream?”

Oh shit, she’s in her stride, hands firmly on her hips staring him down. I can’t help myself and my laughter tumble out, a full on hearty laugh causing my shoulders to shake up and down and tears stream from my eyes. This is just too good. The guys let go too and we’re all chuckling. Cal has shrunk in size and I almost don’t want her to stop, she’s put him in his place as eloquently as usual. Her eyes burn into him and the guys take pity on his off colour face and start explaining to him what he did wrong, chatting amongst themselves.

She turns and frowns at me, I can see the tiny worry lines crinkling her eyes, unsure if I’m laughing at her. I walk to her and whisper, “Amazing baby. You’re fucking amazing!”

She gives me a shy grin and wraps her arms around my waist. “I’m sorry Kye, last night...”

“Shh, no apology needed. You’ll talk to me when you’re ready, I won’t force the issue, Sweetheart.”

She grins again. “I was going to say last night was... fun, when can we sneak away and give Cal more to talk about?” She bites her lip and my cock jumps to attention. She’s never usually this forward, she hardly ever instigates intimacy.

“Fun?” I question, feigning annoyance.

She laughs lightly and it does nothing to make my cock stand down, he’s practically dancing at the thought of being inside her again. He’s already taken over planning how quickly I can get us away and where we can go. It’s a good job she’s stood in front of me with her back to the guys.

She stands on tiptoes to whisper, “I meant fantastic.” She breathes lightly on my ear, then dips her tongue inside jolting me. My cock’s definitely not going away now as she swirls her tongue around my ear and the sensation is felt at the head of my cock. She’s certainly horny this morning. I call on all my willpower to stop me from walking away from this meeting and taking her in the woods against a fucking tree.

“You’re lucky the team are sat feet away or I’d be fucking you in front of this fire, making you scream until your vocal chords are hoarse. Play nice baby or I still might,” I growl in her ear.

She bites her fucking lip again but nods and makes to take her seat. I stop her and so they all can hear I say, “The floor’s yours, Faith, you can lead this meeting.”

Her eyes widen and I can see her self-doubt. She can do this and it’ll boost her, plus I can’t stand up there with the enormous bulge in my pants, I need to sit with my hands in my lap. I wink at her.

“You can do it, babe. I trust you.”

I don’t know what’s come over me. Kye completely threw me being the complete opposite of how I was expecting him to be. I thought he’d be moody or quietly brooding. I expected him to avoid me for a while but as soon as he saw me his face lit up. His fierce side was let loose by Cal and his big mouth but my show of indifference cheered him up even further. He did the laugh.
The laugh.
My favourite sound in the whole world is his belly laugh, he so rarely takes the time to just enjoy the small things, he’s always ready to save the world, save the underdog. He’s always so serious, headstrong and busy leading so when he releases that sound it does funny things to me. His face loses its hard edge and fleetingly he acts his age. He just enjoyed being in the moment and I fricking love it. I could feel the butterflies in my stomach and my knees went weak. Truth be told it turns me on but I usually clamp my thighs together and ignore it. I guess I’m finally at ease with my sexuality. It was rough for a while when we experimented with if I could be touched. I was scared, nervous and completely sure that the things he wanted to do were wrong, dirty even. He was so patient, never pushing me and more than happy that I’d gotten over the fear of being kissed and having my hand held. I think if I was never ready he still would have kept me and lived with blue balls. I remember the day, our first time as if it happened yesterday. I was a trembling mess, prepared for a world of pain. He’d set the scene beautifully with candles as our soft lighting, he repeatedly told me if I wasn’t ready it was fine, he could and would wait. It wouldn’t change his feelings. He was so gentle with me and I lost even more of my heart to him for teaching me, for not giving up on me. The girl from the past who was still a virgin, who knew so little about life, the girl who was scared to be touched because it was associated with pain. I don’t know why this flies into my brain now when I’m about to address the team but I’m remembering more and more of our time together after he found me and took care of me. Every time I looked into his eyes I fell further. I was weak and pathetic and ready to die but he saved me. I’m so mean to him. He’s saved me countless times in countless different ways and I shut him out over and over again. I would say he has the patience of a saint but that’s really not true. He’s given me so much and I’m going to treat him better. I will open up again, he needs to know where my head is at.

First, I’m going to make him proud and show him he made the right choice by having me on his arm.

“Okay, guys did you see any of the changes in the city or did you head to off grid first?”

“Off grid first,” Saunders tells her.

“Well, then you’re gonna love this... Someone, and I’m not sure who, has assembled an army. All able-bodied men in the city including homeless have been called to action. They were marching in the street all kitted out in AIG jumpsuits, they’ve been training every night and someone I spoke to said she heard loud bangs.”

“The missing guns?” Kye says more to himself than anyone else.

“Exactly what I thought, it must be guns but I don’t know how.”

“Advance Industries had a stockpile of them. Remember the room Donovan came out of?” Kye asks and I nod.

“It stocked things from days of old and there were hundreds of guns and other weapons in there. The day we got back I searched that room and they were all gone.”

“Okay, so we’re up against more guards armed with weapons that can and will kill us and all we have are phasers.” I say, “I forgot as Cal side-tracked me before but I do have two working Comms so I think it’s wise if we do split into two teams that each team has one. At least we can communicate.”

“How do you have working Comms babe?” Kye asks.

I smile at him. “Charlotte. She’s my new best friend.”

“She gave you Comms?”

“Yep. You know the saying ‘Keep your friends close and your enemies closer?’ I’m just working her, however messed up her theories are she does seem to want the same as us. She wanted to be able to communicate with us, to plan an attack together, kind of like in two stages.”

“And you agreed to this?”

“Of course, I didn’t. I told her I’d have to run it past my all powerful team leader and that you’d let her know once I fessed up about the Comms.” I smile sweetly at him; his shock is too cute.

“Well aren’t you sneaky,” he says.

“Better believe it, babe. And while I’m fessing up... I spoke to Fraser.” I bite my lip just waiting for him to blow up but I’m left waiting. He stares at me as if he’s only now really seeing me. Like he’s noticed something different about me.