Adjournment (The Fate Series) (3 page)

I know what you’re probably wondering and if I wasn’t so observant to people and mood swings, I would be thinking the same thing. Why here? Why now? Why at all?

Well that’s easy, because I might be a child, but I’m not completely blinded by love. That night—the one I’m not ready to tell you about—took it all away. That night was the first time I had one of those “life-changing moments” and what it changed was the way he thinks about me, it changed the way they all looked at me. I went from strong and tough to fragile and easily broken. What guy would want that?

I touch my forehead again, wincing at the raised skin that is sewn together, a permanent reminder of how easily I can break.

No, I’m not the tough girl I thought I was… I’m just like everyone else.

How long have I been standing there? It feels like an eternity.

“I’m so excited to be going to the same school in the fall.” I hear her giggle, her arms stretched around his neck as she pulls him back into her.

“Me… too,” I hear him admit.

A proverbial slap across my face. 

“Sidney, go in the house before you do something you’re going to regret,” Molly whispers.

With a small nod, I do as I’m told and walk past the entwined couple leaning against the house. With labored breaths I stride through the great room, stopping when I get to the counter in the kitchen that divides the room. My finger ticks against the counter, I struggle to keep my anger in check, to keep the tears at bay that are pushing against my eyes.

“I guess the best girl won after all.” I hear her high-pitched voice announce from behind me.

Spinning on my shoeless heel, I take in her movements closely. She strolls in, shoulders back and head high, through the tall french doors that lead out to the patio we were just on.

Stupid girl.

“We’ll see tomorrow.” I press my lips together, flashing her a squinty smile.

We will see tomorrow… these girls are all the same.

“When are you going to get it? He doesn’t want you. You with all your calming chants, all your insane temper. No guy would want that, least of all someone like Simon. He wants a girl who knows what she’s doing.” She shifts her weight to one leg with her hand on her opposite hip.

So much for a best friend.

“You’re right, you do know what you’re doing since you had sex with the entire football team,” I begin, laughing a humorless laugh. My anger balances on a tightrope in my mind. “Simon, you picked an experienced one, I have to admit,” I yell out.

“You bitch! You promised,” she growls.

And just like that the rope has been severed…

The room goes black.

Where are my shoes when I need them?

Note to self: Always. Wear. Shoes.

I look around, the closest thing to me is my mother’s marble rolling pin.

She shouldn’t have pushed me.

Grabbing it, I charge after the former big-mouthed girl who seconds ago was telling me exactly what men want and is now looking for that former man to save her.

If he knows what’s good for him, he won’t dare. 

She backs out the doors onto the patio where everyone is standing.

Simon wanted a show. It would be rude of me not to give him one.

“Let’s talk about promises.” I point it at her.

“Sidney, no!” Morgan runs over blocking me from her. “You’re in control, Sidney. You. Are. In. Control.” She pushes against my shoulders.

My mind is spiraling out of control – I hear her, I feel her, but I can’t stop.

“Come on, Sid.” She gives me a quick shake. “Say it with me, I am in control,” she continues to plead.

Blinking a few times, I focus and exhale. My body trembling from residual anger, I breathe through it like I know I should.

“You’re right, I am.” I release a heavy sigh.

She acts like I was going to kill the stupid twat.

Once she peels the wooden handle out of my clenched hand I notice my head starting to pound from the adrenaline that just overtook me.

Everyone stands there watching me silently. Morgan’s eyes focus on my every move as she slowly approaches me like I’m a wild animal. 

Chase is surprisingly the first to speak. “Well, I say we finish cleaning up and forget this whole thing ever happened.” He gives Pricilla a stern look. She opens her mouth to argue but with a simple Chase-like motion he raises his hand to stop her.   

“I want you both out,” I snap.

Her eyes widen as she looks back and forth between Chase and me. He gives a quick gesture with his head, and she gathers her things to leave. Simon doesn’t budge.

The pain in my head is becoming unbearable as I stand here, and I ignore it to make certain that Simon understands exactly what I mean. “Simon?” I say, pressing my palm against my head. He turns, watching me from hooded eyes. My heart falls slightly as I look him over one last time. “We’re done.” I wince from the pain of my voice ringing in my head.

I shuffle back inside to get a pain killer; Morgan walks in behind me.

“Normally I would say don’t take those, however, I think right now you need it.” She gives a weak smile. “Someday, when you’re older, we’re going to be drinking Dirty Shirley Temples and laughing about this,” she says running her hand through my hair. “But for now just be a teenager and cry over your first broken heart.” She reaches into a bowl of candy that sits on the counter.

I nod, trying to think of a future where that scenario would happen, but I can’t.

I don’t think one exists.

That’s when all the pieces snap into place, and just like that Fate… Simon… or possibly my self-evolution has put my life on a different path. One with no plan, no expectations. All those years of holding onto that dream are gone, as is my nonexistent relationship with Simon McAllister; a man I will forever loath. Even if I have to force myself to do it. 

My heart slowly begins to beat again but it feels different, it feels heavy, like it’s beating just to survive.

“Want a peanut butter cup to help calm you down?” She tosses one at me.

I catch it and watch as it twists around in my debating fingers before I walk to the trash to throw it in.

I’m not fragile, weak, or broken. Now, I’m closed off and cold…

Love is a fairy tale for children…

And I just grew up.

 

 

Don’t put that in your mouth…

May 23rd, 2013

 

“So where are you going on your date tonight?” Lexi asks, from behind her laptop screen.

I hear her, but it’s the clanging of dishes on the table next to me that pulls my attention from the café’s front window where the sun pouring through has captured my attention for the past ten minutes. I don’t feel like thinking about anything other than the fact that winter is on its way out and spring is racing in close behind. I watch the couple as the waitress puts their food down, rubbing their hands together while they look over their plates.

So in love, so silly. It’s disgusting… don’t they know people are trying to eat.

Lexi’s fingers snapping over the screen at me drags me out of my thoughts. I shake my head, coming back to the conversation.

“I’m sorry, I wasn’t listening to you. I was staring out the window, admiring how spring looks,” I admit.

It’s half true.

“The window is that way.” She points to it. “I know that look so don’t try and lie to me,” she says. I roll my eyes. “You were thinking you want pancakes but you won’t give in to their sweet temptation,” she giggles and winks.

She is using code of course.

“Keep it up, and you’ll ruin pancakes for me.” I narrow my eyes at her.

“You don’t eat pancakes anymore. So I don’t have to worry because someone has already ruined them for you.” She puts on this bratty childlike face that makes me want to lick her fork. “Are you going to answer me or not?” she asks.

Squinting one eye, I stab my fork into a strawberry, the corner of my mouth pulled to the side as I think about the date she set me up on.

Where did she get the idea that I would ever want to go on a date let alone a blind one? I’ve known her for close to ten years, and she’s never pulled something like this on me.

“I don’t know. I don’t really want to go,” I groan, taking a bite. The sweetness of the strawberry filling my mouth makes me hum. Who needs pancakes with all their artificial sugars and heaviness, anyways? Not. Me.

The couple to my side catches my attention again. She reaches over her plate to his, gathering some of his food to try it.

See? Disgusting.

“I figured, anyways, according to “The Hierarchy of Date Nights”, ‘Thursday nights are pretty good: It's almost the weekend, and people usually feel freer to stay out late on a Thursday night (and be hung over at work on a Friday) than they do earlier in the week. Still, Thursday isn't a complete free-for-all. A Thursday night date means you want to have a good time, but you're not yet ready to give up precious weekend time. A weekend date you have to work toward.’ So that’s not too bad.” She smiles up at me as she sits back in her seat, coffee in hand.

I sit here, fork held in air since I was about to take another bite. Blinking continuously at her, I try to take in everything she just said.

Who is this person sitting across from me? I need to find this guy she’s dating and slap some man into him. He is turning my best friend and fellow dark side dweller into one of those… those… happy women.

My body shudders at the thought.

“According to the what… of what?” I can’t help but ask.

“The Hierarchy of Date Nights… it’s an article that Glamour did a few years back… here look.” She spins the screen toward me.

Well I’ll be damned, they really did.

Reading through the Thursday night date night I see she’s right… and they’re right. I don’t feel like giving up my weekend nights for a blind date.

“Okay, well, this is fascinating and all,” I say in a fake cheerful voice as I spin the screen back to her, “But I still don’t want to go.”

She, ignoring me completely, leans forward. Her face disappears behind the screen and continues to read the article.

“When I speak do words come out?” I ask to no one in particular. My head shakes slightly in shock that she is so in this ‘Let’s get Sidney a man’ mood.

Clearly she doesn’t care what I want. She’s lucky. A less mature me would have grabbed her fork, spoon, and knife by now; licking them all and returning them to their original places before she could notice.

“I’m going to bookmark this, that way I know where a date stands before I even go.” She begins to click away.

I release a heavy sigh and look back out at the sunlight. I better eat the rest of this strawberry before she says something that makes me lose my appetite.

“I thought you were working?” I glance back at her for a second. If she can call me out on things, than I can call her out for goofing off.

“I am—I just got sidetracked. There is a new dystopian movie in the works. Jacob already put together some costume sketches. I think we should get some makeup designs done as well.” She spins the screen back to me.

Oh right, I should probably tell you who Jacob is. He’s our best friend and costume designer on the film we are currently working on.

Looking over his sketches I nod while sipping at my coffee.

“I heard about this—Jacob just finished the books so I think I’m going to borrow his and read them over to get a better idea of what they’re looking for.” I twist the screen back around to face her again.

I lean back in my chair with my coffee, she opens her mouth to say something but instead her eyes widen.

“Dammit,” she mutters, looking around anxiously.

“If you think you’re reading them first forget it. You’re a hoverer. You park yourself over my shoulder when you read a book first, like you’re waiting to experience my reaction with me. It’s weird. Then there was the one time you sat across from me eating a bowl of popcorn while I read. It was Fifty Shades of Awkward.” I lean forward to whisper the last part. Her face remains frozen. “I’m not giving in, I’m serious. I read first from now on,” I add taking another sip of coffee.

“You need to leave,” she whispers.

“You’re kidding?” I stare at her for a moment. “Fine, you can read them first. Don’t be such a baby about it.” I shake my head.

“No, you need to go. We need to go… now.” She grabs her bag.

“We can’t just go. There is this thing called a bill. It comes to the table after the food.” I laugh at myself.

“That’s funny. How much money do you have on you by the way?” She crosses her arms. Her eyes flicker from me to somewhere behind me.

I slowly turn my head to see what she is freaking out about. “E—nough, why? What’s wrong?”

“Don’t turn around!” she whispers loudly at me, her hands frantically waving around.

This gets the attention of the cutesy couple next to us.

“Put your head down. Don’t move.” She sinks back behind her laptop, her hand covers the top of her face as though it’s some sort of camouflage that will make her unrecognizable to someone.

We might live in Manhattan, but you would be surprised how small it is. All these people and poor Lexi always runs into someone she doesn’t want to see.

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