Abuse (16 page)

“I only have sex with my friends, my clients and the people I love. This doesn’t limit me much.”

— Renata Koreman

~~~

Renata Koreman

I’ve left the bedroom door open, but Gustave knocks courteously anyway. “Renata,
Monsieur
Marks has arrived.”

“
Merci,
Gustave. Please show him in.”

My eyes widen in surprise when Joshua is ushered into my room, with Max his guide dog by his side. Max is somber and well-behaved as he’s working, but I can see from the light in his eyes, and his upright stance, he’s glad to see me.

Gustave nods, and shuts the door.

“Wow,” I breathe appreciatively. “You look amazing.”

The last time I saw Joshua, he was wearing a yellow Polo shirt buttoned right to the top, and beige trousers with a leather belt cinched in tight at his waist. A more nerdy presentation would be hard to imagine.

Right now Joshua is dressed to kill and oh Lord, what a difference it makes. Crisp white button-down shirt, a modern, quiet tie, and a three-piece tailored silk suit. The black sunglasses he’s wearing are a designer brand.

He stands up straight, his shoulders squared—André must’ve taught him that. A tall, slim man in his prime, the ensemble gives him a confident, mature air. He looks so handsome. I’m blown away. André has definitely worked his magic.

Joshua gives me a shy smile. “Do you… like it?”

“Very, very much. It was worth every penny and it’s a real compliment to me.”

“That’s what André said. He told me when visiting a lady it is important to look one’s best as a sign of respect.”

“Thank you Joshua. You’ve made me feel quite special.”

His open smile is more self-assured. “He’s given me physical exercises to do every day, too. He says this will make me fitter and more attractive to the opposite sex.”

“He’s right.” I laugh while peering up at his face

I move toward him. While I’m sorry he’s blind, I’m extraordinarily pleased he can’t see me. I can study him all I want. It’s so liberating. Having someone’s eyes on me sometimes freaks me out.

“Please, come forward, about twelve steps ahead of you is a bed. Do you mind sitting there? I’ve put the doggie bed out for Max, if you want to take him out of harness.”

“OK.”

We sit beside each other and Joshua takes the harness off of Max. Max is eight years old, but when taken out of his working gear he really lets go, snuffling and prancing like a puppy. Joshua smiles and I laugh.

I show Max his cushion and give him the leather chew toy I’ve brought, which immediately makes his day. He turns a few circles, then settles down to gnaw on his toy.

I return to the bed and sit down beside Joshua, my stomach alive with excitement. In chatting with him via email I feel as if I know him. He’s such a dichotomy. Brilliant yet socially inexperienced. Confident and mature in his area of expertise, yet innocent as a child when it comes to women.

Somewhat rigid and obsessive, Joshua’s disability is also his gift. A fanatically dedicated rocket scientist has got to be a good thing, right?

In school, the way he communicated to his peers was too direct and honest. Unable to fully comprehend nuances and innuendos, he struggled with friendships. Once he lost his sight it gave him an excuse to further isolate himself from others. The success in his field of interest must have made his need for social interaction seem even less important.

I want to teach him it’s not that difficult to relate to the opposite sex. I’m also honored to be the one to show him the wholesome fun and joy of lovemaking.

“Are you ready for this?” I ask.

“Yes.”

“You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do.”

“I know.”

“Will you take off your sunglasses?” I ask.

After a slight hesitation, he frowns, but takes them off. There’s some minor scarring around his eyes and his open, light blue eyes are cloudy. It’s obvious he’s blind. It appears he’s also sensitive about the subject. Is he worried how he looks?

“Thank you. There’s very little scarring. You’re a handsome man, Joshua.”

“I am?”

“Definitely,” I assure him.

I take his sunglasses and set them on the bedside table. It’s so easy working with this guy. He can’t see anything, so I don’t have to concern myself with meeting his gaze.

When I pick up both of his hands, one in each of my hands, a small tremor runs through his body. Other than when I gave him a gentle kiss on the lips at the coffee shop, we’ve never touched each other.

“Would you like to feel my face?”

He nods. “Please.”

I place his palms, one on each side of my head with his fingers touching my temples. He’s tentative at first, but soon his face strains with interest as he focuses all of his attention on me.

“I thought you were older,” he says, “but you’re young. How old are you?”

“Twenty-two.”

Brow drawn down in concentration, he nods, not surprised. Warm, probing fingers intently explore my eyebrows and forehead. They trail along my cheeks, nose, jaw and ears. This questing, impartial—yet absorbed exploration of my face is strangely erotic.

His thumb whispers along my lips, and my breath catches.

Blind people hear everything.

At his questioning head tilt of surprise, I say, “What you’re doing is very sensual, Joshua. I imagined us having sex and the thought excited me.”

His surprise turns to an innocent joy. “I see,” he says. “Wikipedia says there are many erogenous zones. In addition to the nipples and the genital area, many are aroused when their eyelids, eyebrows, temples, shoulders, hands, arms and hair are subtly touched.”

I curb a laugh at this no doubt direct recitation. “That’s very true, for me anyway. I also like kisses,” I hint.

“You do?” he says, and a rosy blush appears on his cheeks. Is that embarrassment or pleasure I see on his face?

Doctor Marks is a genius. He told me via email he was going to research the subject of sex, and I suspect he went a little overboard. He’s such an interesting guy and so different from anyone I’ve ever met before.

One hand curls around my neck, and the other cups my cheek as he tentatively leans toward me and presses his lips cautiously against mine. He’s warm, and sweet and uncertain. Every bit of his awareness is concentrated on me.

It’s a sensual delight to be the focus of his attention.

He smells so good and I love the feel of his kiss. His breath is warm on my skin. I’m supposed to be monitoring him, making sure he’s OK, but the man has me mindless already.

Initial moments with someone for the first time are a huge turn on for me.

I didn’t ask for a kiss—I asked for “kisses.” Joshua takes my suggestion literally, and presses his sensuous lips in soft feathering kisses all over my face and neck. Meanwhile, he continues to “see me” with his fingers, stroking my hair, the tips of his fingers exploring every part of me, even my ear lobes.

I’ve never been so thoroughly caressed. From my shoulders up, I don’t think there’s an inch of flesh he’s missed.

He nuzzles along my ear and the column of my neck, two places that make my panties instantly wet. I throw my head back and give a deep groan of pleasure. Disturbed by this unfamiliar sound and afraid of hurting me, he recoils, even taking his arms away. His expression is questioning and anxious.

“No, no, that feels so good. Don’t stop,” I encourage him, easily meeting his sightless gaze. “You can lick, suck, and even bite, too.”

His face brightens. After all his intense study, he hadn’t thought of this.

“Wait,” I say. “Do you want to touch more of me?”

He nods.

I stand up, grab his hands and pull him to his feet directly in front of me. Max stands up for a moment, stares at us curiously but then lays back down.

“Want to find out what I’m wearing?” I say playfully. “Or do you want to just take what I’m wearing, off?”

My attempt at light humor surprisingly sobers him. “Both,” he says quietly, and there’s that sweet blush again. I watch his Adam’s apple move in his throat as he swallows. I’ve seen this in clients before. Joshua’s nervous and turned on.

Once he gets past this initial anxiety, he’ll be fine. Joshua needs me, and I adore being
needed.
I know I can help him.

My lips curve up as a tendril of amusement adds to my growing arousal. His eager interest and his innocence are making me hot as hell.

I place his hands on my shoulders. “Can you figure out how to do it?”

“I think so,” he says in a low voice.

His movements become much less tentative as firm hands roam over my sheath dress. He skims down from my shoulders, along the sides of my breasts and to mid-thigh where the hem of the dress is.

Without hesitation, he slowly raises the slinky material up and over my head, dropping it casually on the floor.

I giggle. “Good job.”

Joshua grins a flash of white teeth. His hands reach out and grip my bare shoulders, while his thumbs find my bra straps. He turns his head and tilts an ear toward me—as a blind man, his ears are important. I guess it’s his equivalent of seeing.

God, I love the concentration on his face. He spends time tracing my shoulders and collarbones with intense interest, curiosity and lust.

His breathing changes as his fingers follow my bra strap down to my breasts. A soft noise comes out of his mouth, a kind of “
umm
” sound. Right about now I’m thinking
ummm
, too.

“Go ahead,” I encourage him, when he discovers the front opening clasp to my bra.

His clever fingers know exactly what to do. The man releases my bra and drops it to the carpet as if he’s been doing this all of his life. Both hands cup my breasts and his eyebrows shoot up in surprise.

I wish I had a camera to take a picture. The look of astonished delight and almost reverence in his expression is priceless.

I know I’m getting well paid for this, but I swear to God. Joshua Marks, I’d do for free.

“At the touch of a lover, everyone becomes a poet.”

― Plato

~~~

Renata Koreman

My breasts grow heavy and swollen; they ache. Joshua’s inexperienced touch eases them. Finding my erect nipples with each thumb, he inhales sharply and traces them and my areola with fascination.

“Your nipples are hard but your breasts are so soft,” he marvels.

“You can lick, suck, kiss and bite there, too,” I whisper.

Joshua doesn’t hesitate. He steps in closer and his suit brushes against me as he instinctively wraps one arm around my back. He bends his blond head down to my breast.

“Mm,” I sigh. I swear I could come just from watching him.

As the heat of his mouth encompasses my nipple, a lightning bolt of arousal tenses my core. My breath catches. I squirm and rub my thighs together in an attempt to ease my throbbing clit.

“That feels good,” I murmur, and melt against him.

Encouraged by this display of arousal, he swirls his tongue, nibbling and kissing while his now confident, needy fingers trail over my flesh, continuing their determined exploration.

A single-minded male animal has taken over. Joshua’s doing just as he likes; what comes naturally. He’s making his own noises now, soft tortured sounds of male arousal and sexy, raw need.

There’s a fine tremor in his body. Joshua’s shaking with desire. I am too. My legs feel weak; I need to hold on to something.

“Please don’t stop,” I gasp. My hands search purposefully under the jacket of his suit, gripping his waist. Aching, needing, wanting; I pull myself against him, His body is tense and hard. Mine feels soft and liquid.

“Mm,” he mumbles. His mouth is too full of breast to reply.

“God, yes… yes,” I say, as I slip out of my drenched panties.

With tacit agreement, moving in unison, we urgently begin to undress him. He takes off his jacket, while I reach for his tie, pulling it loose then starting to work on the buttons of his shirt.

His skin is hot and pale, but when his erection springs free, it’s engorged, thick and so damn red. The swollen crown is almost purple. A bead of milky fluid sits at the tip. Yum.

My eyes move to his face. His features are harsh and fierce with lust. In part, this is the ecstasy of arousal. It’s also the pain of gathering sexual tension, building powerfully—right to the edge without release. The man needs to come… badly.

I reach down to hold him, curling my fingers around his long, thick length and his cock jerks. He gasps and his hands tighten in a convulsive grip on my shoulders, while his hips instinctively thrust towards me at my touch.

The musky male scent of him makes my mouth water. I want a taste, but he’s not ready for that. Not yet.

“I dreamed of this,” he murmurs in a deep, husky voice.

“Me too,” I admit.

His body knows exactly what to do. I swear—Joshua didn’t need to study a thing about sex. I’m already so horny, but I restrain my yearning to jump on top of him and ride him to completion. Damn, I want to fuck him silly.

If he seems hesitant, that’s what I’ll do—but I think he’s already figured things out. He’s had a week to think about this.

His cock is incredibly hard and dripping. He won’t last long. That’s fine, because I won’t either.

Breathing raggedly, desperate and naked, we both fall onto the bed together.

Joshua lays on top of me, his thick shaft pressing hard against my mound. I pull him to my face for a real kiss. This time, he understands what I want and doesn’t hold back. Warm and soft, his full lips slide deliciously over my own.

This
kiss goes deep. His tongue sweeps inside and explores my mouth in a sexy, erotic dance.

The man not only wants me, he
needs
me.

Nothing turns me on more.

My breathing is loud and harsh, my pulse speeds. I can hear blood roaring in my ears. My clit feels so distended, pulsing wildly, right along with my racing heartbeat. We each long to somehow get closer, both writhing and pressing frantically together, savage and primal in our lustful abandon.

The sensation of my stiff nipples brushing against the hairs of his chest, the weight of his body upon mine, his ragged breathing and my own—it’s all building rapidly toward something amazing.

“My God, you’re a fast learner,” I rasp against his mouth, as I curl my arms around his neck. My fingers rake through his tight, blond curls. I push my hips up toward his firm body, moving to direct the hard heat of his erection. I moan when it presses exactly where I need it.

There’s no way Joshua could stop now. This inexperienced young man, without any real finesse, has made me hotter than hell. I feel as though I might burst into flames.

“Can I be inside of you?” he asks eagerly, in a hoarse voice.

“God, yes! Please.”

I’m drenched, hot and throbbing. I spread my legs further and he reaches down between them, his fingers at my entrance. He gasps in astonishment at the feel of my arousal. I adjust myself and reach down to help guide him inside. His cock jerks when I touch it.

When the rigid length of his shaft enters me, Joshua exhales with a heavy grunt of pleasure.

I see stars as he pushes inside. We just had maybe thirty minutes of foreplay and that’s more than enough for me. The feel of his thickness stretching my sensitive tissues sends me right to the edge of release. My back arches and my whole body stiffens. Even my toes curl.

Joshua doesn’t move.

I remain still too, except for the tightening of my internal channel, throbbing with pre-orgasmic pulses. Overwhelmed, I shut my eyes in an effort to absorb these erotic sensations. Holding my breath, I also struggle to postpone what I know is going to be a powerful climax.

“Oh God,” I whisper, and it sounds like a prayer. I don’t think I can hold back.

“Can I…” he gasps, his whole body trembling. “Renata, I want to… is it OK… if I move?”

“Yes! Move, Joshua, please!” I beg. “Don’t stop. Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me now!”

“Yes,”
he growls with fierce pleasure.

Aware of my impending climax or not, Joshua reacts instantly. He begins to pound himself inside of me in rapid stokes, pushing in to me, pulling out, in, out, faster and faster, in, further in, in, in! Panting heavily, he drives himself inside of me—balls deep, over and over again.

My roiling sexual tension unexpectedly explodes.

“Yes, yes, God yes!” I give a full-throated scream.

I’m coming. I can’t stop myself, my internal muscles clench around him. He doesn’t slow. Urgent, fast thrusts demonstrate how close he is. His balls slap hard against my buttocks as I writhe and convulse uncontrollably.

He finally attains his own release with a sexy, guttural groan. My body continues to shudder with pleasure. When his hot seed fills me, I think I climax again—unless it was one of the longest orgasms of my life.

I almost snicker out loud, as I guess I can’t rule that out.

When we both begin to come down from our intense brush with nirvana, Joshua rolls off of me and lays on his back. We didn’t use a condom, but that’s no big deal. He was a virgin and I’ve been tested and am on birth control. We’ll do condoms later today, as it’s something he needs to learn.

I curl up against his warm chest. My head rests upon him, his arm around me, draped across my back. His heartbeat thunders in my ear. We both breathe heavily, slowly catching our breath.

“Is it…” he says quietly, “… is it always like that?” Joshua asks, while his pulse and breathing return to normal.

“No,” I murmur with one hand resting over his slowing heartbeat. “It’s different every time. Sometimes it’s even better. Since this was your first time, it probably feels extra special because you have nothing to compare it to.”

Triumphant, he laughs and his broad boyish grin captivates me. “I can’t believe I thought I didn’t need this in my life.”

I smile. “Now you know.”

His body is relaxed, his expression serene. Playing with my hair, he lifts one long blonde lock and inhales deeply. “I love the smell of your hair,” he says, running his fingers over my head, stroking along my scalp. “Thank you, Renata. I’m so grateful.”

I could tease him and joke about thanking
him
for such an excellent climax, but something in his countenance makes me hold back. Sharing sexual pleasure is nothing new to me, but I suspect our time together changed his life.

“You’re welcome.”

He shakes his head. “To have you here with me, touching me and breathing the same air—it’s a miracle. It feels like I’m living inside of a perfect dream.”