A Wild Ride (10 page)

“This is amazing,” Ryan said, taking another bite as the sauce, cheese, and noodles slid down his throat in a burst of flavor. “The best I’ve had.”

Hy smiled slightly.

Conversation around the table was nearly nonexistent for a while, and Ryan didn’t push it. He finished his piece, and Dante gave him another. “So, you’re here to go over those papers?” Dante asked.

“Yes,” Ryan said, putting down his fork. “I thought I’d inventory them so you know what you have. I may need to take them back with me, but I won’t do that unless you know exactly what’s there.”

Dante nodded and turned his attention to his grandfather, who continued to eat slowly, his hand still shaking a bit. The soft expression on Dante’s face bordered on angelic as sympathy and deep love exuded from him. Dante cleared the table once his grandfather had finished eating and then settled back in his chair. “Do you still want to go over things with Ryan or are you too tired?”

“I’m fine. Go on and finish the evening chores while I talk with him,” Hy said, and Dante nodded. Ryan could tell he wasn’t pleased about being asked to leave, but Ryan kept quiet. Hy was his client, and Ryan needed to abide by his wishes.

“I’ll get the box,” Dante said as he stood up and then left the room. He returned with the shoe box and set it in front of his grandfather before leaving the room. Hy pushed the box toward Ryan.

“Let me get my bag—I’ll be right back,” Ryan said, and he hurried outside to his car, catching a glimpse of Dante as he went into the barn. He grabbed his case off the backseat and then hurried back inside. Together he and Hy went through the papers and certificates in the shoebox.

“I’m sorry to say that most of these aren’t worth much,” Ryan said as he held up a certificate for shares in a gold mine. “A lot of these were issued in the twenties and thirties, and the most valuable thing about them is the certificate itself. People frame them and hang them on their walls.” Ryan set the certificate aside and pulled out the next paper, which was more of the same. “I can check when I get back to the office just to verify, but I doubt there’s much value here.” Ryan could see that Hy was definitely disappointed.

“I wanted to leave something to Dante,” Hy said.

“We’re not done,” Ryan said as he pulled out yet another gold mine certificate. “Where did all this come from?”

“My wife’s family. She hung on to all this stuff for years,” Hy said. “I guess I should have known it was just junk.”

Ryan pulled out another certificate and set it with the others. “Where did her family come from?”

“St. Louis. My wife was born there, and we met when her family moved to the area. She was a little spit of a thing, but beautiful as the day is long.” Hy shifted in his seat and pulled out his wallet, showing Ryan a picture. “That’s her when we got married.”

“She’s beautiful,” Ryan said, stopping to look. He didn’t comment that she looked a lot like Dante. That, he kept to himself. Ryan reached into the box and pulled out the last certificate. This one felt different from the others, and Ryan was grateful it wasn’t another gold mine certificate, but he wasn’t immediately familiar with the company name.

“Oh,” Hy said when Ryan showed him the certificate, “they’re gone now too. I guess I should have known.”

Ryan gathered up all the certificates and organized them in the order of his inventory. “Here’s a copy of what you have. I’d like to take them with me and do some research just to make sure there isn’t something here. I doubt it, but it’s better to be safe than sorry.”

“Can you help me with the ranch too?” Hy asked, and Ryan sighed.

“I think you should talk that over with Dante.” Hy shook his head. “I’ll do what you want, but….”

“This place isn’t going to amount to anything ever again. It’s too small, and Dante doesn’t need to be saddled with it or with me. I think I want to sell it and then go into a home so he won’t have to take care of me all the time,” Hy said. “He needs to have a life of his own and not spend every waking moment taking care of this place and me.” Hy looked up from the table, and Ryan saw nothing but worry and pain.

“You know I’m not a Realtor,” Ryan said.

“I know. But I own this place free and clear. When I sell it, I’ll need some sort of… something so I can get income from the money to pay for a home, and when I’m gone, Dante gets the rest.” Hy slowly got to his feet. “It’s not that I got that much time left. The doctors say maybe a year.” Hy slowly walked over to the sink. “And I don’t want you to tell Dante about this. I’ll tell him.” Hy glared at him to emphasize his point.

“Of course,” Ryan said. “But I think that maybe you should ask Dante what he wants.”

But Hy ignored him again, and before he could press it any further, the front door opened and Dante strode inside.

“How did it go?” Dante asked.

“Didn’t find anything, just like you said,” Hy replied a touch bitterly.

“I gave Hy an inventory of everything and I’m going to take these certificates back to the office to check them out, but I’m afraid he’s most likely right,” Ryan added, finding it difficult to look Dante in the eye at that moment. He’d promised Hy he’d say nothing about his plans for the ranch, but he also knew that when Hy told Dante, he would be very upset.

“Doesn’t matter, Gramps, we have more than enough to make it through.” Dante lightly patted his grandfather’s shoulder.

“I’m gonna go to bed. I gotta get up early,” Hy said, and then he shuffled out of the room and down the hallway.

“He’s been doing that a lot lately,” Dante said, following his grandfather with his gaze.

“He told me he doesn’t expect he has long,” Ryan said.

Dante nodded. “He was diagnosed with ALS.”

“Lou Gehrig’s disease?” Ryan asked, and Dante nodded.

“It’s been going through him pretty fast. A couple years ago, he could nearly keep up with me, and now he shakes and goes to bed early.” Dante gripped the edge of the table, his knuckles turning white. He said nothing, and Ryan turned away to give him some privacy. It took a minute before Ryan heard Dante breathe deeply. There was so much that Dante didn’t say, not that Ryan actually expected Dante to confide in him. Because he wouldn’t, no matter what Ryan wanted.

“I believe that last time I was here you invited me to ride the death trap you have out in the old equipment shed,” Ryan said. He wanted to change the subject and he wasn’t sure how else to do it. He really wasn’t particularly looking forward to riding that thing, but it was the only idea that came to mind. He wasn’t sure if Dante would go for it, but eventually he looked up from the top of the table.

“You’re serious?” Dante said, his voice trembling slightly. He cleared his throat and took a deep breath, then let it out slowly, and Ryan could almost see him regaining control of his emotions.

“Of course. You’ll have to teach me how to do it, but I’m game if you are,” Ryan said.

“Okay,” Dante agreed with a bit of the energy Ryan had seen in the bar after the competition. “I need to check on Gramps. I’ll be right back out.” Dante hurried down the hall. Muffled voices reached his ears, and Ryan heard Dante moving around. Water ran, and then more voices before Dante returned. “Let’s go.”

Ryan followed him outside and around to the building that held the mechanical bull. Dante turned on the lights, and Ryan wondered if the damned thing had grown since the last time he’d been here. Now that he’d already agreed to ride the thing, it looked monstrous.

“No backing out,” Dante said, and Ryan nodded.

“I’ll ride the thing,” Ryan said, and he stepped up to it and carefully climbed on.

“Hold onto the rope with your right hand and use your left for balance. The trick is to flow with the bull rather than trying to go against it. The machine is going to buck and twist like a real bull. It will also change direction quickly. What you want to do is go with it, and when you feel yourself falling, don’t try to stop it. The floor is padded, so just roll with it and you won’t get hurt.” Dante made sure he had a good grip and was in the right position.

“I think I’m ready,” Ryan said.

“Okay. I’m going to put it on the lowest setting. It isn’t going to move too fast.” Dante stepped across the pads to the controls. “Just have fun.”

The machine began to move under him, and Ryan held on for dear life, clamping his legs onto the machine and pulling on the rope. Of course all that did was get him ejected before he could think about it.

“Are you okay?” Dante asked as Ryan spit out a bit of fluff from the padding.

“Yeah,” he answered as he got to his feet.

“Try it again. You know what to expect now, so relax a little and move your body. The only chance you have is to move with it. The second you tighten up, you’re toast. You watched me in the finals, so you saw how I moved and rolled with that fucking bull. Do the same on the machine.”

“I’ll try,” Ryan agreed. “But I don’t think I can move the way you did.” He climbed back on the machine, and Dante checked him once again. “I’m as ready as I’ll ever be,” Ryan said, and Dante started the machine.

This time he knew a bit more of what to expect. The dang thing still threw him, but he lasted a few seconds before hitting the foam padding.

“That was better,” Dante said.

“You do it,” Ryan said, and Dante climbed on.

“Turn it up to medium high,” Dante said. “I’m not warmed up enough for everything it’s got.” Ryan stood near the edge of the foam and adjusted the controls. “Let her rip,” Dante said, and Ryan turned on the machine. Dante moved and rolled with the machine, hips moving this way and that, arm in the air, whooping and hollering to beat the band. Ryan watched Dante move, appreciating the flow of his body and the way his hips undulated with each movement of the machine. Dante shifted his balance, and the bull seemed to sense it and moved the other way. Dante sailed off the machine and onto the padding, his leg sweeping Ryan’s. He went down as well, landing on top of Dante.

“That was amazing,” Ryan said, peering into Dante’s eyes. Ryan was about to get up when he realized exactly what was pressing against his hip. “You’re pretty amazing.” Ryan moved closer, hovering over Dante, but coming no closer. He’d said he’d wait until Dante asked and Ryan never went back on his word.

“I can’t do this,” Dante said without heat. “I can’t feel like….”

“Like you’re less of a man?” Ryan asked, and Dante nodded. “It takes one hell of a man to be willing to give himself to someone else. There’s no shame, nothing weak, in getting what you need. Sometimes it takes the strongest of men to be able to submit to another.”

“Are you shitting me to get in my pants?” Dante asked, his expression darkening.

“I’ve already been in your pants, to use your words. And no, I’m telling you the truth. If you look inside yourself, you’ll know it.” Ryan waited without moving as a myriad of mixed emotions, from confusion to skepticism, passed across Dante’s expression. “Do you think for one minute a weak person could have kept their eyes closed the last time we were together? You did. You didn’t peek or cheat, not once. That takes strength most people don’t have.”

“But that was just games,” Dante said.

“No, it was more than that. It required trust and strength.” Ryan moved his face closer to Dante’s without actually touching him. “Giving yourself to someone else requires both. And let me tell you this: if you weren’t a man, all man, I would never be interested in you.” Ryan held Dante’s gaze. “I’m not into men who look and act like boys, and I’m not into men who aren’t interested in the type of relationship I need. That
we
need.”

Dante gasped, and Ryan half expected him to buck him away and jump to his feet. Ryan expected the fear that Dante had demonstrated in the hotel room to show itself again. But then maybe Jacky was right.

“You know I know that’s all bullshit,” Dante said, and Ryan pushed into the foam padding to lift his weight off Dante.

“Is it? If you think about what I said and what it is you really want, deep down, you’ll know it’s not bullshit, as you say, but the truth. You’re very much a man, Dante, and if you think that letting someone else have control in the bedroom makes you less of a man, that only shows how little you know.” Ryan got his knees under him and moved away from Dante. He immediately missed the warmth, but he wasn’t going to push. He’d probably done enough of that already. Ryan got off the padding and strode toward the door. “I’ll see you around. Tell your grandfather I’ll call him in a few days.” Ryan hated walking away like this. Part of him wanted to take Dante and show him just how much strength it took to let someone else have control, but he’d made a promise and he was going to stick with it.

“I don’t know, okay?” Dante said from behind him.

He stopped. “The question is, do you want to find out?” Ryan asked without turning around as his heart pounded in his chest. Dante was going to have to ask him to stay and be willing to ask for what he wanted. This was Dante’s decision. He had to keep the excitement and tension he could feel building out of his body language. Slowly Ryan turned around. Dante had hardly moved a muscle, still lying on the padding where he’d fallen. “What is it you want?”

“I don’t know,” Dante whispered, and Ryan saw a small shiver run through him.

“I think you do. You’re just afraid of what you want.”

“And you’re not?” Dante challenged.

Ryan stepped over to one of the vertical beams that supported the roof, holding on as he leaned his head against it. “I’m afraid all the time. But I try not to let that stop me.” Ryan sniffed slightly. “There was a guy in college, Benjamin, and he was very much into being a submissive. He and I tried a lot of different things together. It was from him that I learned that I was dominant, and he really got off on that. We did things together, really kinky things, because that was what he loved. Unfortunately I didn’t know what the hell I was doing, and a few times I… hurt him. Things went further than I intended because I had no control. The thing was, Benjamin, Benji, didn’t mind; in fact, he loved it. But I wasn’t comfortable.” Ryan felt his hand shaking and he clutched the beam a little tighter. “Things were getting out of control, and I got the bright idea of trying to scare Benji off the things we were doing, so I found an article on auto-erotic asphyxiation. Basically, you choke yourself when you’re coming to heighten the rush. It’s extreme, and the article contained pictures and everything.”