Read A Slow Burning Fire Online

Authors: J.F. Jenkins

A Slow Burning Fire (19 page)

“I'm sure,” he said. She could imagine him smirking as he said it.

Arial put her face into the palm of her hand.
I think he took that the wrong way. I can't say anything right today.
“I have to go now, Marcus, but I'll be sure to call you if anything changes.” She hung up just as Bryce returned.

He opened his mouth, shut it, and then opened it again, looking all too much like a fish out of water. “I, you, me, we… er, dinner… I need to go.”

Her heart sank as she listened to him. “When you figure out how to spit out whatever you're trying to say, will you call me?”

“Yes,” he said firmly. “Yes, I will call you. Tonight. I need to look at a calendar so I make sure to pick a good night for our date. I mean, dinner… er, that is unless you want it to be a…” He shook his head. “I'll call you tonight.”

“I'll be here working on the song.” She gave him a weak smile and watched him leave.
It's for the better anyway. You'll never be Katie. She may have not been good enough for him, but he's still in love with her anyway.

 

Chapter Sixteen

 

Arial had dinner with her family, but her mind was elsewhere the whole time. She didn't participate much in the conversation. For the first time since she arrived, the pressure to do so was no longer there. Caroline made no snide remarks, her mother served without any commentary, and Arial finally had that traditional, normal, family warmth she'd been longing for. The only problem was, she was pretty sure everyone at the table knew something was wrong. How could it not be obvious? She couldn't even fake a smile.

“Girls, it's our turn to clear the table tonight,” her mother said, once the last bite was taken. “Tiffany, you can collect, Caroline, you can wash the table down, and Arial, you can help me with washing the dishes. It shouldn't take long if we all do our share.”

They could take all the time in the world for all Arial cared. She didn't want to go up to her room and work on a love ballad. The motivation and inspiration weren’t quite there. All of the words were written, and all she had to do was tweak some notes and keys, but just reading the lyrics would send her into a confusing jumble of emotions all over again.

Slowly, she stood from her chair and took her empty plate into the kitchen so she could get started. Her mother wasn't far behind.

“You're so glum, honey,” Patty said.

Arial gave a half-hearted shrug. “I have a lot on my mind.”

“Boy stuff!” Tiffany chimed in, carrying a stack of plates.

“I don't want to talk about it,” Arial said, glaring at her sister.

Shrugging, Tiffany left the room to collect the rest of the dishes. Arial turned on the sink and started to rinse what she was given. Her mother continually glanced at her but didn't say anything. Which was frustrating because the woman always had an opinion about something.

“What?” Arial snapped, unable to take the silence anymore.

“I didn't say anything, honey.”

“But you're thinking it, and I just wish you'd say something!”

Her mother took the rinsed plates and silverware to place them into the dishwasher. “You said you didn't want to talk about it.”

Arial huffed. “And I really mean that I do, or I don't. I don't know! I'm still angry.”

“Caroline told me about the magazine article. She saw it at the store today when she was in town. She also mentioned you were upset by that Katie woman who is so upsetting. I'm not sure I understand it though, because you are far better looking and a better catch than she'll ever be. He'll come around just fine.”

“She's upsetting because she hurts him, and she's… you said it yourself. A man who's been dumped by his first love is dangerous to fall for.” She focused her gaze on the plate in her hand. A plate that she had been rinsing in the sink far longer than needed. “It's true, and it hurts, Mama. I've been trying to forget about what I feel all summer, and then when I finally had the guts, this had to happen! And now I feel all of the same things I did before. Even if he does think of me the same way as I do him, he'll only compare me to her the whole time. There's no way I can compete with her. She's sexy and experienced and knows him so much better than I ever will.”

Patty dried her hands on a towel, then grabbed Arial by the shoulders and forced her to turn and face her. “She might for now, but those are things you will learn, too. When the time is right, of course, preferably after you're married, because you shouldn't be giving away somethin' so precious to a man who won't commit his life to you. And from what I understand, that's what she did to him. He gave her somethin' special, and she decided to toss it like it was trash. That's not something you should be scared of competing against. You'll win hands down. I'm sure he thinks you're plenty sexy without you even realizing it. Sometimes the good gal is more desirable than the bad one. You wanna know why?”

“Why?” Arial folded her arms in front of her.

“Because she's a mystery and a real prize worth keeping. Men may put on a front that they want some kind of a hussy in between the sheets, but really they want a woman who's worth respecting. A woman like that fulfills all of his needs, regardless of how many tricks she may have learned. And a man certainly doesn't have any problems with learning in that subject either.” She brushed some of her daughter's hair aside. “Our culture puts a lot of pressure on being experienced. In the end, men want the same thing women do. To be loved. It doesn't matter how many men you have or have not been with. And it doesn't matter how many ladies he's had. If you love him and he loves you, then you will be perfect lovers for one another.”

Arial closed her eyes. “But what if he still loves her?”

“If he does, I will be very surprised.” Her mother nudged her. “I've seen the way he looks at you. It's the same kind of goofy grin your father gave me when we first started datin'. Besides, how could he want her over you anyway? You're so much prettier, and you've been best friends for years.”

“Well, there is this thing called the friend zone. Sometimes you're too good a friend with someone and it makes things weird for any potential romance.”

“Has he called you one of the boys?”

“No.”

“Then don't worry about it.”

Scowling, Arial stepped away from the sink. She knew her mother was right, but she didn't want to admit it, let alone talk about the problem anymore. Having a discussion about romance and making love to a man, along with all of her insecurities that went along with just thinking about it, was not something she wanted to do in the kitchen anyway.

She dried her hands on a nearby towel. “I think you've got a handle on the rest.”

“You don't need to be all offended. If you can't talk about this with me, who can you talk to?” her mother asked.

“The point is I don't want to talk about it anymore, period.” She shook her head. “Thank you for the advice and the pep talk, but I'm not going to feel better until I can figure out what's going on inside his head.” And that was a conversation she was terrified to even start with him. He was the only person who would understand the added pressure on her life, and she couldn't talk to him about it either. All of those things applied well to people who lived a normal life outside of the public eye, but her life was nothing like that. Finding one true love was difficult enough as it was. To find it in Hollywood was near impossible.

Chores done for the time being, she went outside in hopes that the fresh air would help her collect her thoughts. The sun was going down, the air warm, and the soft sounds of the insects chirping could be heard from out in the yard. She walked to the pond and sat down on the grass, gazing out at the still water.

It's not so simple. I've been lying to myself, thinking I could have a real relationship with him, believing that everything would stay the same after we left here. But it isn't going to work like that.
As soon as their plane landed in California, things would change. The city would slowly start to suck away their soul again, and it would only get worse when the media caught on to what was going on. Because she knew without a doubt that if she and Bryce had followed through on their date, it would have gone well. They would have clicked well and made a wonderful couple — for a time.

How would things change back in Los Angeles, though? Would the paparazzi get the better of them? What if he found another sultry vixen eying him on the set of his new film? What if another man tried to seduce her? She was strong enough to stay away, but would Bryce believe her? Without working on the show on a regular basis anymore, how would that change their relationship to begin with?

Too many questions, and they were ones she was afraid to ask. Bryce would either react one of two ways: get defensive and deny the whole thing, or get overly sweet to the point where she couldn't trust his answers. Sometimes, if he got sappy enough, he said things that were good in theory but unrealistic. His imagination easily got the better of him.

Arial pulled out her phone, tempted to call him. Sure, he had said he would call her first, but what was the harm in her taking it into her own hands? The phone buzzed to life as she stared at it, and Bryce's name appeared on the caller ID. While the temptation was great to let the phone ring until she was ready to talk to him, she knew she couldn't put it off forever.

“Hey,” she said. “You have perfect timing, as usual.”

“Why's that?” he asked. “Am I interrupting drama, or getting you out of shoveling cow poop?”

She laughed softly. “Pretty sure the poop has already been taken care of for the time being. Family drama has been on a bit of a minimum for the past few days, thankfully. I just meant you have this way of…”

“Way of?”

Knowing when I need you the most.
“You just picked a good moment, that's all.”

“Then I'm glad I didn't do it earlier like I had originally planned,” he said. “Anyway, I wanted to apologize for earlier. I shouldn't have run out like that, especially when we have a lot of work to do. And thinking about that, I realized maybe we should focus on our act. I know how scary it's going to be for you to use one of your own songs, so it should be perfect. After the show, I want to take you out.”

“You don't have to, Bryce,” she said. “I know I had asked you, and you feel bad about bailing last minute, but it was a spontaneous sort of plan to begin with.”

He was quiet for a moment. All she could hear was his soft breathing, and that was the only way she knew the line was still connected.

“Arial,” he said ever so gently. She wished they were having their conversation in person because she could vividly see his expressions. Every time he used that tone, his face relaxed and his smile crept up into his eyes.

“It's okay. You don't need to explain anything to me,” she said.

“I… I know it was a spontaneous thing, but it meant something to me that you would ask.” His voice sounded so timid. That wasn't like him. Was he afraid of her?

Her gaze shifted to the occasional puffy cloud floating above her, and she admired the pink and orange hues it reflected from the setting sun. “Why?”

“You're my best friend.”

“So?”

“Doesn't that mean anything to you?” he asked. Now he sounded rough, and she didn't understand why.

She let out a soft groan. “Yes, of course it means something to me. It means everything. I'd be completely lost without you. But I don't understand why you'd care so much if I asked you out.”

“Ask me out, or want to have dinner with me?”

“What's the difference?” She rolled her eyes.

“A pretty big one.”

Are you even going to bother explaining it to me?
She gave him a moment to see if he would, in fact, elaborate, but all she heard was more breathing. Frustrated, she rolled onto her stomach and started to pick at the grass in front of her. “And that difference is what?”

He let out something that resembled a huff. “Asking someone out is a lot different than simply having a friendly dinner. I would think you would get that, of all people.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means I think you've been wanting the same thing I have and are tired of all the blurry lines. You must want some straight definitions too, right?”

More than anything.
“Okay, a solid definition. I was asking you out, but I think you're right in saying we should wait until after the show. We can celebrate the end of the summer, and it can be just dinner.”

“I'm confused. You don't want it to be a date?” he asked, his voice barely audible.

Arial squeezed her eyes shut, holding back the tears starting to pool in them. “I don't know what I want, and that's the honest truth. What I do know is this summer is a dream, and in a couple of weeks we're both going to be waking up again. This place isn't our normal, and it'll be best if we both remember that.”

“But I —”

“Now it's my turn to inconveniently go,” she stated. “Goodnight, Bryce. I will see you tomorrow for rehearsals after chores.”

****

Bryce stared down at his phone, a mixture of shocked and confused. His brow furrowed as he tried to figure out what had just happened exactly. Arial was afraid, or she wouldn't be pushing him away so strongly.
But what is she so afraid of?
he wondered. A small smile formed on his lips.

“Me,” he whispered. That's what she was so afraid of. She didn't need to be, but it confirmed everything in his mind. Two and two were put together. She was afraid of him because she
did
feel the same way as he did about her.

For the time being, he would give her space and not try to win her heart over. They would practice their duet and keep things at a business level. On the day of the fair, all of the gloves were coming off. He would show her the true depth of his feelings and prove to her that they could make things work, no matter where they were.

 

Chapter Seventeen

 

The days until the weekend of the fair were a blur. While Arial saw Bryce every day, they didn't do a whole lot of talking. She recognized his “work-mode” right away. Bryce was a diligent worker. When he got into something, he got
into
it. All he wanted to talk about was ways they could improve the duet and his excitement for the show. She didn't want to talk about the metaphorical elephant in the room, but at the same time she felt like it was sitting on her chest and squeezing the life out of her. Unresolved conflict she was used to in terms of her family, but with Bryce it was plain awful. Anytime there was a problem between the two of them, it killed her.

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