The train chugged into the station, the wheels screeching as the engineer braked to a stop. After several people stepped down to the plank platform, the conductor helped a lady up the steps, then looked toward the Wolds.
“Time to board.”
Ellie sucked in a deep breath, kissed Arne and Rachel one last time, and hugged her mother. “I’ll write.”
“I know. We will too.”
“All your things are loaded.” Olaf stopped at her side.
“Thank you, Pa.”
“I’ll bring your furniture in time for the wedding.”
“How can I ever thank you enough?”
“Just love that young man and never turn your back on our Lord. That’s all I ask.”
“I will.” She rested in his loving arms for a moment longer, then took a deep breath and stepped back. “I love you all.” She turned and took the hand the conductor offered to help her up the steep steps. At the top she waved again, seeing them all through the sheen of moisture that threatened at any moment to overflow. She found a window seat on their side so she could wave again and smile bravely, but all she wanted to do was plaster her nose to the glass and let the tears flow.
The conductor called, “All aboard,” and the train pulled slowly from the station, each turn of the mighty wheels taking her farther from this family and closer to the next. Was life always like this? Leaving and arriving? She mopped her face and collapsed against the back of the seat with a sigh that drained the starch from her shoulders and added a quiver to her lips.
“Lord, keep them safe,” she whispered into her handkerchief, then dried her eyes again. Would the well of tears never dry up?
The
clackety clack
of the wheels lulled her into somnolence, her eyes and nose burned from all the wiping, and her mind floated, drifting between Grafton and Blessing, flashing vignettes of her two lives onto the backs of her eyelids. Laughing and playing with Astrid, Sophie, and Grace those years before; sewing with her mother, then teaching Rachel; sitting in the Grafton church with the sun streaming through the stained-glass windows, reminding her of the beauty of heaven; studying in the one-room school of Blessing, listening to Pastor Solberg read to them from
Pilgrim’s Progress, The Adventures of
Tom Sawyer,
stories from the Bible, and
Robinson Crusoe
.
Sometimes she felt like a young lady, and other times she wanted to hide behind her mother’s skirts.
Hide yourself in me
. The words kept time with the train wheels.
Hide yourself in me
. She knew where the words came from, but why now? Why did she need a hiding place? She was on her way to living her dream of being with Andrew.
Lord,
I love him. I’ve always loved him. You say there is no fear in love, but
there is. Perfect love casts out all fear. What if I have a baby born dead?
What if I can’t have any babies? Perfect love. Only you have perfect love.
Oh, please teach me to love the way you love. Thou who art the Alpha and
Omega, the beginning and the end, the one who never changes
. The rock- ing of the train carried her into a sleep that allowed the healing of her tear-swollen eyes and raw throat.
She woke as the train slowed, the conductor stopping by her seat. “Your stop, miss. Blessing.”
“Already?” She stretched and hid a yawn behind her gloved hand. She touched her hair to make sure it was still tucked under her hat and repinned the straw to straighten it.
“You look lovely, miss. I know your young man will be overjoyed to see you.”
“You know Andrew?”
“Of course. I’ve had this run for years. Many a meal I’ve enjoyed at the boardinghouse. Henry and I go way back.”
“Oh.”
He tipped his hat. “You take care now, and welcome back to Blessing.”
Andrew was standing on the platform, tall, tanned, and studying each window. She waved, and he broke into a smile that blew away all her doubts and fears. Andrew was waiting for her. She picked up her valise and looped her reticule over her wrist.Welcome to Blessing, indeed.
She never took her eyes off his as the conductor helped her down the stairs and reached in for her valise and set it on the platform. But instead of flying into his arms like she’d dreamed of, she walked straight and sure, treasuring the way his smile creased his cheeks, glinted from his eyes, eyes that matched the sky above, a Dakota sky of a blue that deepened the more you looked into it.
“Ah, Ellie.” His chin quivered, and he blinked once to clear the moisture that made her sniff as her own eyes needed clearing too. She stepped into his arms and sighed.
“You’ve come home.”
“Indeed.” She clapped one hand onto her hat to keep it from being knocked askew as his lips met hers in a kiss of welcome, of promise. His arms encircled her waist; his heart beat against hers. He smelled of sun and clean wind, starch in his shirt and shaving soap on his cheek.
Andrew
. Stepping back, she laid a hand to her throat. Ah, the pounding of her heart and the warmth of her face.
He grabbed her again, this time swinging her around. “I have so much to show you, to tell you. The house came. The barn is nearly done. Tomorrow we start haying, and you’re here. You’re finally here.” He ripped his straw hat from his head and waved it at the leaving train. The conductor waved back.
Ellie clung to his arm.
I’m here. I truly am here
.
“Let’s go look at our barn and then go home.”
“All right.” She tucked her arm through his as they strolled down the platform, watching the train shrink while it headed down the tracks. She felt like skipping and twirling, as Rachel did, enjoying the swirl of her new gingham dress. Up ahead huge stacks of lumber, siding, and trusses took up all the platform and spilled onto the dirt. “There’s so much.”
“I know.” Andrew laid his other hand over hers and squeezed. “Big enough to have several children before we have to add on.”
Babies. Why did he bring up babies today? When can I talk to him
about my fears?
Andrew didn’t seem to realize her withdrawal. He bent over to pick up a packet. “This must be the plans.” He turned it over to find a line drawing of their house.
Ellie stared at it. “Andrew, that isn’t the one we chose.”
I didn’t like
this one nearly as well
.
He shrugged. “I know, but I figured this one would be better.”
“How could you make that decision without asking me?” She knew a note of querulousness colored her voice, but really—the nerve of him to do that.
Andrew assumed patience like putting on a cloak. “You weren’t here, remember? And I decided this was a better deal. After all, it was fifty dollars cheaper.” He spoke slowly, as if trying to explain something to someone who was a bit slow.
“But you didn’t even tell me.”
“I didn’t think it was that important. It’s a great house, and it’s all ours.” He took her hand and tried tucking it back into his arm.
While she resisted for a moment, Ellie gave in and let him have his way.
You should be grateful you’ll have a brand-new house,
the little voice inside chided.
Most people don’t start out with a brand-new house
and barn
.
“Let’s go home.”
She nodded. Home was with Andrew. Ignoring the voice inside her head, she said, “Oh, my things.”
“They’ve already loaded them into the wagon.”
“My chickens?”
“If that squawking crate is your chickens, yes.”
“Do we have a place for them?”
“Well, we can put them in with Astrid’s chickens, or we can put wire over a stall in our barn to keep them in. I’ll build an outside run as soon as I can.” He helped her up into the wagon, then paused, looking up at her. “I am so glad you are finally here.”
“Me too.”
And while I can’t wait to see all the others, I am so glad
you came alone to pick me up
. She settled her skirts, glanced over her shoulder to make sure all her trunks and bags were there, and watched Andrew step up on the wagon wheel and take his place beside her.
I
wonder if I will ever tire of watching Andrew.
The thought made her smile again. Not anytime soon, that was for sure.
They swung by the store, and Penny must have been watching for them, for she burst through the door as soon as the wagon stopped. “Welcome home, Ellie. I’ve been afraid you might not come until fall, and I need help so badly. Mr. Valders is home with the grippe, and Astrid is helping Dr. Elizabeth. I need help.”
“And Hjelmer has been out working on our barn with the rest of us.”
“Along with every able-bodied man in town. Ingeborg said she had room to store your things, so just bring what you need. You’ll make a fine shopkeeper.”
“I’ll see you later this evening, then?”
“Right, and you’ll stay in our spare room. I’ve moved the children up to the attic for the summer.”
“Where are they now?”
“Out to Tante Kaaren’s. Ilse is teaching the girls to sew, and George is teaching the boys about woodworking, just like Onkel Olaf used to do. Don’t know what Kaaren would do without the two of them. George is so good with the students, being deaf himself.”
Andrew flicked the reins and headed out.
“What are the twins doing?”
“Most likely hoeing and pulling weeds at Tante Kaaren’s. Mor’s strawberries will be ripe soon, and then the canning begins.”
“I will make jam for us.”
Us—what a wonderful word. Us—as in
Andrew and me. I will spread the jam I made on bread I made—for us
. Ellie hugged the thoughts to herself.
Us
.
“Once I show you the barn, I need to go help with shearing the sheep. Mor said she would give us a fleece or two.”
There it was again, the magic word—us. She tucked her hand through the crook in Andrew’s arm. “How wonderful. Do you suppose she would let me use her spinning wheel too?”
“Oh, I’m sure. And the sewing machine, the loom, whatever you need.”
“The women from church gave us a braided rug to put in front of the stove. Andrew, wait until you see all the lovely things we have.”
“Not just chickens?” He turned his head and grinned at her.
Her heart turned over with love for him, but she poked him in the ribs. “Do not make fun of my chickens. I have plant starts too and both flower and vegetable seeds.”
“I suppose you want me to dig up more garden space.”
No, but I sure wish you’d told me about the house. All you had to do
was tell me
.
They waved at the children playing in front of one of the houses, and a dog ran barking at the heels of the horses. Out of town he clucked the team to a more lively trot.
As they drove past the home fields, he pointed out to her what was planted where, the wheat now tall enough to bend in the breeze. Bluebells nodded beside the road. “If the corn keeps growing like it is, knee high by the Fourth of July won’t be a problem. I let the sow and her piglets outside today for the first time. The little ones ran and squealed, their tails curled tight. The first one to dig in the dirt with his snout thought he was some special.
“There it is.” He pointed toward the north, where two men were up on the barn roof nailing shakes in place.
“Oh, Andrew, it looks huge.”
“Not as big as the home barn, but that loft should hold plenty of hay. The hay stand looks good too.We had a little rain. Now if it just holds off until after the hay is in . . .”
The closer they came, the rounder grew her eyes.
How did we
afford such a barn? Should I ask him about that?
She knew that both of their gifts from Mr. Gould went into buying the house.
“We’re going to go pick up the house materials this evening. Now that will be a caravan of wagons almost like harvest.” He stopped the wagon near the barn.
“Is that Toby Valders up there?”
“Yes, and Gerald too. They’re both out of work until haying starts, so they’ve shown up every day.”
Ellie turned to stare at Andrew. The tone of his voice said more than his blank face.
“What could I do? Tell him to go away?” He shook his head. “Someday I’ll work on his house or barn. Half of Blessing has pounded nails or split shakes or carved pegs. Maybe we should just call it the Blessing Barn. Mor is planning a party if we have time between haying and harvest. Other than graduation, there haven’t been too many parties around here, and a big empty barn works good for a dance.”
“Empty but for my chickens.” She thought a moment. “Maybe it’s not a good idea to bring them out here until we are living in the house. If a fox or something gets in, we won’t be here to hear it.”
“I plan on moving out here as soon as the roof is on the house.” “Before we are married?”
He nodded and swung down from the wagon. “I’ll ride back and forth for the chores at home, but I think someone should be here—just in case, you know.”
“Oh.” For some reason, the idea disappointed her. She’d dreamed of walking into their brand-new, unlived-in house after the wedding.
The other house. Not the one they now owned
. It would still smell of paint and wallpaper, and together they would decide where to put their new furniture. She would put away all the lovely things she’d made through the years and all the gifts so generously given.
He smiled into her eyes as he lifted her down from the wagon, and all thoughts of disappointment flew right out of her head. The feel of his hands on her waist and the muscles in his arms bulging under her hands all sent a shiver straight to her middle. It was a good thing he held her for a moment after setting her feet on the ground, for her knees might well have buckled.
Don’t be silly,
she ordered herself.
This is only Andrew, remember?
Only Andrew, my right foot
. Even her fingertips felt like she’d touched a hot stove. A little voice inside snickered.
Wanton
. Where was a fan when you needed one?
“Welcome, Ellie,” Haakan called from the board he was standing on so he could hammer shingles in place on the gambrel roof.
“Thank you. I can’t believe how far along this is.” She pulled the strings of her reticule over her hand and set it up on the seat.