A Little Bit Scandalous (10 page)

It was one thing to don a disguise as a man and play in a gaming hell. It was quite another to wear a beautiful ball gown and mill about the cream of London’s crop. Odd that she’d feel more comfortable as Mr. Grey than she did now as Caroline the Repeat Debutante.

Had she stayed a bit longer in London she might have been more skilled in discerning men’s intentions, because it would seem she had misunderstood those of poor Mr. Bishop. Certainly he did not mean to court her. Certainly he had not meant to imply that meeting her had given meaning to his visit. But what if he
had
meant that? What if he were to court her? She could not imagine loving a man as unremarkable as Mr. Bishop, not when she’d loved Roe so fiercely and for so long. But Roe was not meant for the likes of her. Only her youthful ignorance had made her imagine he might one day love her in return. She would be happier if her heart would be satisfied with anyone but Roe. But hearts were not known for their logic and hers could not be swayed to consider Mr. Bishop.

The opera house positively buzzed with people. Men and women milled about in the entryway, and all Caroline could think of was finding their seats. Thankfully, Mr. Bishop felt the same as he quickly led them through the bustling crowd and into the theatre.

Finally in their seats, Caroline held the theatre glasses up to her face and looked about the room. It was not her first venture to the opera, but it had been many years since she’d been here, and she found she had new eyes to appreciate her surroundings. The red velvet seats matched the curtains flanking the stage.

The opera began, and the longer they sat there, the more uncomfortable Caroline became. The singing was spectacular, but Mr. Bishop leaned closer and closer to her with every song. It was enough for her to cry off for the evening during the intermission.

Once they returned to the carriage, Caroline rubbed her temples and frowned. If her horrid acting did not give her a headache, her nerves would.

“I am so sorry you are not feeling well.” Mr. Bishop’s features were etched with concern. “Do you get headaches often?

“It is I who should be sorry, Mr. Bishop.” She had already overused the headache excuse. “No, I’m not generally one to get headaches, so perhaps I’m coming down with something. I have ruined your evening, and I do apologize.”

He shook his head. “Nonsense. It serves me right, ignoring you the way I did. I should never have let my old friend monopolize my time that way. It was rude and unmannerly of me. You deserve much better behavior and attention.”

Had she been a woman to be wooed by sweet words, that last earful would have sent her into swoons. Truth was, though, she’d been relieved when he discovered someone he knew sitting near them. She smiled. “I suppose we could spend the ride home apologizing for the poor turn of events this evening took.”

He chuckled. “You are a remarkable woman, Miss Jellico, and I must admit, I am quite taken with you.”

Icy fingers trailed up Caroline’s spine. A suitor? Who would have thought? She tried to calm her nerves. Perhaps she should consider the scenario. If she did not marry, she would restore her family’s home and live in it. Alone. Forever alone. Still, the thought of saddling herself in a relationship she did not want left a sour taste in her mouth.

“I am quite flattered, but I must confess that I am not so worthy of your praise.”

He opened his mouth to disagree, but she silenced him with a raise of her hand.

“Hear me out. I find you a most charming and delightful man and enjoy your company. It is always a pleasure to find one with whom you can have such enlightened conversations, but I must warn you that I am not looking for a husband. I am too busy to take on the duties of a wife.”

She considered him a minute, taking in his long face and kind eyes. There were few people in London with kind eyes. She would hate to lose the opportunity to befriend him.

“I realize you were not proposing. You could simply find my intellectual mind stimulating and would like to start a reading organization with me. And if that is the case, then please ignore all that I have said.” She took a breath and sat back into the carriage seat.

He smiled and reached across to pat her hand. “As much as my pride would love to claim I was only interested in you for a reading group, I am afraid that would be a lie. I do think it is a little premature to make any definite decisions, though.”

The carriage rocked to a stop. She was home and had accomplished her goal. Mr. Bishop was such a gracious fellow. She did not feel as horrible as she had anticipated.

He assisted her out of the carriage. He leaned down and kissed her cheek. “I realize that is bold, and perhaps ungentlemanly of me, but I’m an American and I don’t know any better.” He gave her a crooked grin that made her almost want to rethink her decision about him.

Caroline sighed and let her shoulders slump. Now she understood why young girls slept so often—courting turned out to be more exhausting than she had considered.

…

Roe knew going to Belinda presented its own risk. She’d made it abundantly clear she was willing and ready to be his mistress again if he only said the word. They’d had a good time when they’d been together, but it had been meaningless in the end. There was nothing between them besides carnal pleasures, and he’d grown bored with her. But he appreciated that she was an intelligent woman who knew people around London. Perhaps she could tell him more about Mr. Lamb.

He was shown into her parlor and took a seat in one of the blue brocade chairs, hoping it would create distance between himself and his hostess once she joined him. Nearly twenty minutes after arriving, Belinda floated into the room wearing a revealing dressing gown, an interesting choice for the time of day. He suspected Belinda had put it on especially for him, to remind him of her wares, as it were. He was reminded. There was no way around it, her breasts virtually spilled out of the low-cut gossamer.

“Monroe, love,” she said slowly, her voice low and seductive. “How lovely for you to visit. I’m afraid you caught me while I was still lounging about in bed.”

“Indeed.”

“Alone, in case you were wondering,” she added. “But that could certainly be remedied.”

“I came to ask you a few questions,” Roe said, deliberately ignoring her baited comments. “About Mr. Lamb.”

Her brow furrowed. “The director at the Dover Street Girls’ Asylum? Why ever do you want to know about him?”

“I am new to the board, whereas you are an established member, and have been for a while,” he said.

“Yes, don’t you remember, love, it is how we met?” She smiled broadly her fingers twirling the ribbon that tied her dressing gown around her. “I came to your townhome looking for your sweet mother to discuss something about the board and there you were, looking just as dashing as you do now. I could scarcely keep my eyes off you, and I nearly forgot why I’d come to your house to begin with.”

“Yes, Belinda, I remember it all.” He’d seduced her that very day and they’d begun a heated, though short-lived, affair. “Back to Mr. Lamb. How well do you know him?”

“Not as well as I know you. Though I suspect the man would certainly welcome an invitation to my bed. He is kind. Seems competent enough. There have been many changes to the orphanage since he took over as director.”

“Good changes?”

She shrugged. “I suppose it depends on who you ask. The board has been forced to collect more monies for the changes he’s instituted, but whatever is good for the children, right?”

“Right,” Roe said. “And has anyone questioned the added expenses?”

“A few times. Lady Greene and Lady Winguard once had a conflict with Mr. Lamb, but the protests didn’t last long once he had us walk through some of the sleeping quarters.”

He considered asking her about the empty rooms, the discrepancy in how many girls were actually at Dover House, but he still didn’t know if somehow Belinda might be involved. “I see. Do you trust him?”

“I’ve never thought about it much. You know I serve on so many boards, love, I barely have time to make all the meetings.”

Roe did know. Belinda enjoyed being involved and needed. So the woman served on a variety of charity boards that constituted the majority of her social outings for each week. It assisted in her reputation as being the lovely and benevolent widow. But Roe knew there was much more to Belinda than that. She might be generous with her late husband’s funds, but she was also quite generous with her body, taking no fewer than six lovers since the man had died two years before.

This had been a waste of time. Roe came to his feet. “Thank you for your help.”

“Leaving so soon?” She walked over to him, ran her palms up his torso, then dipped a finger into the crook behind his cravat. “Roe, love, stay with me. Let’s have one more time together. I’ll remind you how delicious it is between us.” With one swift movement, she pulled the ribbon and her dressing gown gaped open, then slid off her shoulders. She wore nothing underneath. Her voluptuous curves were tempting. She was a beautiful woman, but he didn’t want her. He found his tastes ran a bit differently these days.

He grabbed her by the wrist when she made a move to unfasten his trousers. “Belinda, we are not having another affair. I told you, I am done.”

She sucked in her breath. “I see.” Her voice was tight and brittle.

“I came here to make those inquiries. I apologize if I caused you any distress.” And with that he strolled away.

Additional funds had been required from the board members more than once since Mr. Lamb had taken position as the director. He needed to speak with Mr. Simpson about how much of Roe’s money had been sent to the orphanage because of his mother’s board position. Mr. Lamb had asked for even more money at the meeting the other day. Perhaps it was time to pay a visit to the orphanage and see where all the money was actually going.

Caroline knew the minute Roe walked in the door that he had been with Belinda. His hair was tousled, for heaven’s sake, and she was fairly certain he had lip stain on his jaw.

“I thought you went over there to inquire about Mr. Lamb,” Caroline said before she’d thought better of it.

He stopped mid-stride and eyed her. “And you believe I went there for another purpose?”

“It’s quite evident you did.” She was annoyed, though she knew she had no reason to be. He in no way belonged to her.

Slowly he stalked towards her. “What do you think I’ve been doing?”

She swallowed and looked up at him, looked into his warm mossy-green eyes. “Your affairs are no concern of mine.”

“Your blush says otherwise, as does your breathing.”

He stepped even closer to her, so close she could breathe in the scent of him. Oh, how she could get lost in the masculine form, his broad shoulders, his height, the strength of his legs. Good heavens, she was becoming a poet and not a very good one.

He ran the back of his hand down her cheek and she closed her eyes.

“Caroline, I told you Belinda was my lover at one time, but is no more. I have no desire to enter into such an arrangement with her any time in the future.”

She opened her eyes and was so struck by his earnest expression that she did the unthinkable and kissed him.

His soft lips responded immediately as she leaned into his body. She kissed him as passionately as she could, pouring her desire into that one moment. He deepened the kiss and she thrust her fingers into his hair. It was surprisingly soft, considering how short he kept it.

His warm hands cupped her bare arms, gripping her tightly as he swept his tongue against her own. Coils of pleasure sprang from her abdomen and wound up around her body to tease and tingle her breasts.

As their tongues molded to one another, desire surged through her body, peaking her nipples. She was quickly losing control of the situation and herself. Kissing him had been foolish.
You’ll get hurt
, a voice inside reminded her. But she’d lived this long wanting Roe and it hadn’t destroyed her, she could continue to do so. It was not as if he loved her, as if he ever would love her.
That
would hurt. Still, she wished her desire for him would disappear.

It didn’t matter that she didn’t want to want him; her body did not want to listen, did not want to stay away. No, her body wanted to wrap her legs around him and have him make love to her right up against the wall of his study.

His lips trailed to her ear, then down her throat. He cupped her breast, and she arched into him.

Yes. She wanted this. She wanted him.

And then his lips were back on hers, hot and hard against her own, and when his tongue invaded her mouth, she gasped. He took with this kiss, demanded, and her body reacted all on its own as if this was the moment they were supposed to be in. That was the last coherent thought in Caroline’s mind as Roe took over the seduction. She vaguely noticed he had picked her up and set her down on his desk. But he continued to kiss her, his hard body melding against hers, and she simply wasn’t aware of anything else but his mouth and his touch.

Desire, hot and slick, skimmed through her body, and she instinctively opened her legs. He moved himself between them, though her skirts blocked her from feeling him press against her.

His hand moved up to cup her breast, and she involuntarily cried out. Her whole body felt alive and full of delightful sensations. Roe pulled her to him and kissed her again, this time slower and with more tenderness. His hand stroked her cheek and desire soared through her body. She might never know what it was like for a man to love her, for Roe to love her, so she reveled in every touch, every breath, every kiss. But she knew eventually he’d remember who she was and he’d step away. And she’d once again see that look on his face, the one that told her she wasn’t good enough. If Belinda were the sort of woman he normally seduced, then Caroline knew why Roe had not been attracted to her. Standing next to Belinda, Caroline was overly tall, too thin, and not nearly curvaceous enough.

“You are beautiful,” he whispered against her hair.

Her breath caught and she closed her eyes, willing the moment to last forever. She’d been told that she was pretty before, but Roe had never once commented on her appearance. As far as she had known, he had scarcely noticed she was a woman. For a moment she believed him, then remembered what would happen if she stood there long enough. She would give herself to him completely and then where would she be? Heartbroken and alone. No, she needed to keep control of herself. She needed to be whole so she could care for the girls who would rely on her.

She took a deep breath, then pulled herself away from him. “I nearly forgot that I have an appointment, if you’ll excuse me.” She stepped out of his study as quickly as she could.

…

Damnation, he hadn’t expected Caroline to kiss him, but kiss him she had. He thought that he’d put an end to her desire for him when he’d told her the truth about Christopher. Evidently not, though clearly she had come to her senses at the end when she’d scurried away. He’d had to find something to occupy his mind else he’d do nothing but relive the feel of Caroline’s lips on his. So for the last few hours he’d sat in his study going over the new notes his solicitor had given him.

Roe still felt heavy with desire for her. He risked so much by allowing himself to lose control with her. He couldn’t afford to dally with her; she was an innocent. And to do to Caroline what he’d done to Penelope… that would be unforgivable. Caroline had no other man waiting for her to sooth her pain when Roe broke her heart.

Perhaps he should take Belinda up on her offer, sleep with her one more time to slake himself. It wouldn’t solve the problem, though, and he knew that. Attempting to sate his desire for one woman by plowing himself into another wouldn’t extinguish that flame.

Grimm stepped into the room.

“Your Grace, there is a Mr. Bishop here to speak with you. He says he is from America.”

It was on Roe’s tongue to tell his butler he didn’t know any Americans, but then he remembered the man Caroline had attended the opera with was an American. Roe waved his hand to let Grimm know to bring the man in.

In he came with his striped trousers and colored shirt, looking very much the dandy. “Now how is it that I’m supposed to address you?” the man asked.

“Formality would dictate you call me Your Grace, but there is no need for that here. You may call me Roe.” Roe pointed to the chair opposite his desk. He also moved the notes he’d been reading out of the way. “Now then, Mr. Bishop, what is it that I can do for you?”

“Am I to understand that you are Miss Jellico’s legal guardian?” Bishop asked.

“That is correct.”

“Then I should like to let you know that I have intentions toward Miss Jellico.” Bishop fidgeted with his fingers, then wiped his hands on this trousers.

Roe raised one eyebrow. Perhaps he should not have given the man leave to use his given name. Perhaps he should have insisted on the formality. “Intentions?”

“Courtship. I need your permission, I believe.”

“Indeed you do.” It had been Roe’s damned idea to put her out in Society for this very reason, but a bloody American? No doubt he intended to take her right back to his country and leave her there.

“So will you grant it to me?”

“Grant you what?” Roe asked, feigning ignorance.

“Why, permission to pursue Caroline, romantically. I should like for her to marry me. She is precisely the sort of woman I’ve been looking for.”

There was no mention of anything specific about Caroline herself. “Has she expressed an interest in your courting her?”

“No, but that shouldn’t matter. I thought that was one of the finer things about English marriages. The men settle things and the women go along with what they are told,” Bishop said. “Not at all the way things are handled in America, where a lady’s whim can ruin a perfectly good match.”

Roe nearly laughed. He supposed he didn’t have much to worry about as far as Caroline agreeing to any kind of relationship with this man. “I believe you have the wrong perception of Englishwomen, and Caroline in particular.”

“So you will not give me permission?”

He would not give this man permission to do anything with Caroline. Not that she would need it, since she was independent enough to do what she wanted where Mr. Bishop was concerned. “I think this conversation is over.” Roe retrieved his notes and went back to looking at them. “Good day to you, Mr. Bishop.”

Roe waited until Wade Bishop left his townhome before making his way to Caroline’s family’s home. He knew this was where she had likely gone, and he’d wanted to give her time. But he also knew she needed assistance with this project, though she would never ask for help. Might as well barge in and see if he couldn’t convince her to take it nonetheless.

He let himself in the front door and walked through the entryway corridor, looking in each room as he did, but she was nowhere to be found. He made his way up the stairs, carefully avoiding the broken steps. What the devil had her tenant done in this house? There was more disrepair as he continued his search.

Eventually he found her in a small bedchamber that overlooked the park across the street. She stood at that window looking out wistfully, one hand at her throat, the other on the glass. How had he not noticed before how beautiful she was? He’d known she was a handsome woman, after all he’d been tempted by her offer so many years before. Now, though, there was something more. He longed to go to her, wrap her in his arms, and soothe whatever made her so very sad.

“Caroline,” he said softly.

She started, turned swiftly to face him, and swiped at the tears on her cheeks. “What are you doing here?”

“I figured this is where you’d be.” He stepped over to her, looked out the window. “What the hell happened to this house?”

She sniffed. “Dogs.” Then she released a tight chuckle. “Mrs. Murdock collected stray dogs and, well, they weren’t very well-behaved.”

“I’ll say.” She fell silent for a while and he allowed her the quiet.

“This was my room,” she said. “I always loved to sit here and watch the people walk in the park. In the springtime the lilacs bloom and it’s breathtaking.”

He knew he should say something, do something to comfort her, but he was afraid to touch her. What she needed right now was an embrace to ease the sadness. But their kiss earlier had lit the flame of desire and he was afraid any consolatory affection he offered her would be ruined because he’d want more. With Caroline he’d always want more.

“I’m using the money I earned playing to put this place back together,” she said absently.

“Have you considered renting this property again?”

“No, as I told you before, I intend to live here myself. I grow weary of the countryside and of having to rely on your good will to pay for my every need.” She looked up at him, her warm brown eyes so full of determination. “Though the damned tenant who previously agreed to terminate the lease early has since changed his mind.”

She hadn’t mentioned any of that. “I thought Mrs. Murdock died recently.”

“She did and originally her son agreed that with her death we would end the lease. But now he has changed his mind.” She shook her head, looked back out the window, her hand holding back the thread-worn curtain. “He says he intends to live here himself. I checked with the solicitor that handled the lease and it is quite binding. At least he won’t be bringing the dogs back with him.”

She sounded so defeated, so sad, that he knew no matter what he would fix it for her.
This
he knew he could take care of. Mr. Murdock could go away with a fatter purse and Caroline would be none the wiser. Still, it concerned Roe to think of Caroline all alone in this house. The thought was nearly more than he could bear. “I could help you find a husband,” he said. They’d talked about it a long time ago, shortly after she’d proposed to him, but she’d told him then if she couldn’t marry him, she didn’t want to marry anyone. But that had been years ago and she seemed so different now, so much more mature and worldly.

Her mouth opened, then closed, and set in a tight line.

Evidently that still held true. His stomach tightened and all at once he wanted to fall to his knees and beg her to be his duchess. But that would never do. He’d be a wretched husband to her, just as his father had been to his mother and his grandfather before that. He would not put sweet, beautiful Caroline in that position. She deserved a hell of a lot more than an irresponsible rake like him.

“No, thank you,” she said. “I know you men seem to think you’re the answer to all problems, but I really don’t feel the need to marry. Perhaps someday, if I could find someone to love, someone who loved me in return,” she said wistfully.

“It’s true. Men need to feel useful. Allow me to assist you in the renovations, then. Caroline, I have plenty of money. And you have the funds from the renter, those are all in an account for you.”

Her mouth opened, then closed. She shook her head. “I had not realized I had such monies.”

“Did you think I was taking those funds and simply absorbing them? It is your money, this is your house.”

“Truthfully, I hadn’t given it much thought, which now seems foolish. I suppose I thought that the funds went to my care, clothing, and my own rent and whatnot.”

He sighed. “Caroline, you never need owe me rent or anything. I pay for your care, as you put it, as I would any member of my family. I think nothing of it.”

“The funds from the rent will help.”

“It will not cover all of the repairs.” He looked around him. “You’ll need additional monies.”

“Which I shall earn myself. But I could actually use some assistance hiring an appropriate person to manage the work load around here.” She smiled softly. “The list of architects is overwhelming, at best. And to be honest, I wouldn’t know a fair price for the labor that’s needed.”