“Hello…this is room 316. Is this housekeeping?”
“Yes…what can we do for you?” a woman with a slight African accent asked.
“I’ma need somebody to come clean this room. It looks like it hasn’t been cleaned in days.”
“But…uh…the last few maids said the guest was adamant about us not entering. I really don’t want to go against his wishes.”
“Well I’m adamant about ya’ll cleaning this bitch. And bring some extra disinfectant too.”
When I hung up with her I reached in Kelsi’s bag, sniffed some sweatpants and slipped into them after confirming they were clean. Then I called Aunt Grace, Delonte’s mother. Delonte was my first cousin, who I was fuckin’ on a regular basis. And he just so happen to be fucking Janet, Kelsi’s mom too. Don’t start trippin’. There are more people fuckin’ their first cousins than you realize. I just happen to be one of the ones who don’t give a fuck. Hell…I got a friend who was married to her first cousin and didn’t even know it. Anyway, Kelsi and Janet murdered Delonte. And since he was Aunt Grace’s only son, she started clinging on to me cuz I’m her niece.
“Auntie Grace, its Kenosha.”
“Where have you been, girl? I been worried sick! Is everything okay?”
“Yes, auntie. Everything’s fine.” I slipped into one of Kelsi’s fresh white t-shirts at the bottom of his bag. I really should just go to my car and bring my stuff in, but not ‘til this fuckin’ room is clean.
“When you coming home?”
Home? It was always weird to hear her say that. I hadn’t had a home or anything resembling it in my 25 year old life. My family disowned me after I decided
not
to pursue some bullshit ass high paying job wit’ the college degree they paid for from Howard University.
I liked the streets. In fact, I loved the streets, and everything in them. Just cuz I talked ghetto doesn’t mean I’m one hundred percent ghetto. I put on that ghetto shit for Kelsi. I fluently speak Spanish, French and Russian and could be anything to any man at any time. Kelsi thinks I’m dumb because my words drag when I speak to him. So I become a dumb bitch cuz that’s what he needs. Shit, if I wanted to, I could run
and
own a fortune 500 company. I’m a boss bitch! Believe dat!
“I’ll be there next week, auntie,” I lied.
“Okay. Just call me more. That way I won’t worry.”
I heard knocks at the door, opened it and saw it was the maid. A petite white woman walked in hesitantly, propping the door open with a stopper.
“Okay, auntie I have to go. Bye.” I ended the call before she could contest.
“You called for housekeeping?”
“Yeah…and you betta clean this mothafucka good too.” I said reaching in my purse dropping a twenty dollar bill on the bed.
Her eyes lit up as she roamed around the room cleaning up Kelsi’s mess. She left thirty minutes later. Then I grabbed the phone book and called a town car to take me around. Believe it or not, this was my first time in New York and everybody told me I had to see Manhattan. So I’ma take some of the cash Skully gave me to burn the stores up.
I ran outside to get my Louis Vuitton luggage from my car and hustled back up the stairs. I hopped in the shower and gave my body a thorough cleaning. I was careful cleaning around my asshole because last night it seemed like Kelsi was banging my shit for points and the opening was still raw.
Once I was done, I smoothed on some Angel body lotion and slipped on my panties. Deciding to look extra-specially-sexy today, I slipped into my Rock & Republic tight fitting blue jeans, a black top with my brown waist length fur and black Maison Martin Margiela boots. My look wasn’t complete without my smoky tinted Tom Ford shades. When I was sure I looked stunning, I waited anxiously for my ride.
Moments before leaving, Kelsi opened the door, and I couldn’t help but notice the look on his face. He was far from happy. His eyes scanned the clean room as he held onto two white McDonald bags. I remained seated on the bed.
“What the fuck happened?” He walked in and tossed the bags onto the bed.
“Do you mean who was bold enough to clean this nasty bitch?”
He shot daggers at me with his eyes. You woulda thought I shitted on the floor or somethin’. I did this nigga a favor! He needed to be on his knees sucking my toes!
“You had somebody in here? In my personal space?”
“I thought you would like it! It smelled like piss and shit before I had it cleaned.”
“I ain’t want nobody touchin’ my shit! So why you disrespect?” He looked under the bed and pocketed a blunt I didn’t even know was there. If I did, I would’ve smoked that shit just to get calm enough to sit in this mothafucka without throwing up.
“Kelsi, it ain’t disrespect. I did you a favor!”
He gave me the look like,
Bitch, I should crush your shit!
He sat on the bed and looked at me seriously. Wipin’ his hands over his face, I took notice to his muscles buckling before his hands dropped by his sides. I wanted to fuck him again but after last night, decided against it.
“You gotta hit it, Kenosha. I got a lot of shit on my mind and I’m five seconds from unleashin’ on you.”
“I was ‘bout to leave anyway, Kelsi. I got a car takin’ me to Manhattan later. So trust, it ain’t even that deep.” I shuffled and then stood up.
“I mean you gotta go back home,” he replied.
“Kelsi, please. Stop trippin’.”
I stood up. And for some reason I became enraged. Who the fuck did he think he was talkin’ to? If he woulda smoked Jarvis’ ass a long time ago, I wouldn’t even be here. So I started laughing.
“Fuck is so funny?”
“You, Kelsi. You sittin’ here checkin’ me ‘bout havin’ this raggedy ass room cleaned, when you supposed to be here in your mother’s name. If you wanted to just live in a hotel room and hide like a bitch, you coulda did that in Maryland. Sometimes I think you just stupid.”
He stood up and I knew I could’ve stopped there but decided to hammer home.
“Plus I think you scared. Cuz if a nigga woulda merked my mother, I’da dealt wit’ that shit wit’ the quickness,” I giggled throwin’ my purse over my shoulder.
He took two steps toward me, reached out wit’ his left hand and squeezed my throat.
“If I ever see you again, I’ma kill you. Get the fuck out!” He released me. When a car beeped outside, I rubbed my throat.
“I’m gone, Kelsi,” I said as I picked up my purse which had fallen to the floor. “But I sure hope you carry it like that when you see Jarvis. Because I’m not your enemy. You are.”
He smirked and instead of leaving before he tried to hurt me, I was determined to know why.
“What’s funny?”
“You?” he grinned. “I notice your accent and slang leaves at will. I’m up on your shit. I know you try to act dumb for me. And any bitch who would go through those extremes is not one I want around. Now kick rocks.”
Wow! How did he know that? His observation scared me. Still, I managed a smile right before I left the room. But the moment the door was closed behind me, across the parking lot, I saw someone staring at me. It was a dark-skin man in his late thirties and he was sitting in a dark blue Ford. When our eyes met, he grinned devilishly and pulled off. Who was he? And most of all, what did he want with me?
Monday, 4:45 pm
****
The prettiest thing I ever seen is green and thin and ain’t shit else come close to it since.
-Jarvis
The New York City sidewalk was jumping as women young and old looked at the handsome man who just stepped out of a silver May Bach in style. Even under the winter sky he was hot. Jarvis moved like waves in an ocean as he walked toward the Toys-R-Us in Manhattan. It was his nephew’s birthday and he promised to get him a gift for his party which he was already late for. Wearing a pair of blue jeans, a brown corduroy blazer with a black custom made shirt under it, he looked smooth. His five o’clock shadow dressed his brown skin softly. And the prominent mole under his left eye gave him a baby face appeal.
“Look, don’t let that nigga go ‘til he tell you how he gonna come up wit’ all my money. Then follow his ass to it. And if you don’t get it by the time I get my sister’s kid this gift,” he barked into the phone. “Kill his ass no questions asked!”
Before Prangsta could respond, the other line beeped. It was Jarvis’s sister who had been pestering him nonstop. Jarvis knew she wanted to know where he was. Had he not been fuckin’ one of his boy’s girlfriends, he would’ve gotten the gift earlier and been on time for the party.
“Fuck,” he said out loud. “I know her ass gonna trip!” Instead of dealing with her quick lip, he focused back on his conversation with Prangsta. “Like I said, hot that nigga if he don’t come up wit’ my money. Somebody been fuckin’ wit’ my shops for the last month and I’m tired of this shit. Niggas gotta be held accountable! And so do you.”
“We got it,” Prangsta informed trying to convince his boss he could handle whatever duty he gave him. “Ain’t no need in even worrin’ ‘bout it.”
“What about my voice makes you think I’m worried, nigga?” Silence. “Exactly…I ain’t worried. But
you
betta be if he still alive and my money not found tonight!”
He slammed his RAZR shut and again his sister’s home number flashed on the screen. He waited for her to leave a message but she never did. As far as he was concerned, he could do nothing about his lateness. Jarvis was almost inside the store when a bum in a brown trench coat begging for change blocked his path. The derelict looked at him and saw dollar signs.
“Can you help me out, sir?” the dirty white man begged with a silver bent up cup in his hands. “I’m just trynna get something to eat.”
“Get a job!” he laughed. “I’m tired of mothafuckas askin’ for handouts!” he continued as he pushed him out his way. When the old man dropped to the filthy New York City ground, he kicked him in his gut causing the man to double over. A few onlookers looked at him with hate. And he dared them with his eyes to say something. Nobody did. Once inside the store he realized he never asked Prangsta was the issue with the “Crown” corrected. He decided to call him back while he had time.
Monday, 4:55
pm
****
It don’t matter who it is. If they got money, then for the moment, they got me too.
-Kenosha
The streets were crazy and I wasn’t use to seein’ so many people walkin’ back and forth at one time. I had so many bags in the back seat of the town car it was difficult to move. I was thinkin’ about goin’ back to the hotel dumpin’ my clothes and ridin’ back to Manhattan to hit a few clubs. Then I remembered, Kelsi told me never to come back. There was nothin’ more I wanted to do then to ditch his ass but Skully demanded that I smooth things over wit’ him. I hated his fuckin’ guts but decided I’d suck and fuck him to sleep later. That should make things okay. I was just about to call him when I saw a silver May Bach pull up on the curb next to Toy-R-Us.
“Excuse me, sir, I’d like to go into the Toy store please,” I said to the cab driver, while my eyes were glued to the money making ride outside.
“We can’t park over there,” he complained. “We’ll get a ticket.”
But when I saw this fine ass dude get out, I became anxious. I had to have him and I had to have him now.
“Either pull over or you not gonna get paid!” I threatened. It’s mighty funny how he decided to go against the law to suit my needs all of a sudden. I shook my head as I checked my makeup before I got out. When he pulled over behind the May Bach, I reached into my purse. “If you stay here until I return,” I said handing him a hundred dollar bill. “There’s more where that came from. Besides, my shit’s in here and I’ll have somebody kill your ass if you try to steal it.”
He grunted and took the money but I knew he wasn’t going anywhere. Money spoke volumes where words failed.
I hustled into the store before my target got away. My prey was deep in conversation wit’ somebody on his phone and that gave me enough time to execute my plan. I couldn’t help but take in the brown blazer and Brown & Black Gucci shoes he was wearing. And that mole under his left eye was too cute for words.
I was so gone I stepped on a kid’s toe and she wailed in pain. I pushed her dumb ass out my way quick. I was fixated on Mr. May Bach. So when I saw him grab a Playstation 3 game system and move toward the counter, I moved with him. Realizing I didn’t have anything to buy, I grabbed a video game for Kelsi. I didn’t realize it was the
Adventures of Strawberry Shortcake
until after I got to the counter. The moment I hit the line, I stepped close to him so that he could smell my scent. I wore the most expensive shit and today I was wearing,
Michael Kors
on top of my
Angel
body lotion. The Combination of the two fragrances was lethal.
“Looks like you ain’t gonna pick up no habit after all,” he laughed, holding his phone to his ear. “I know you happy ‘bout that shit cuz I was serious ‘bout usin’ your veins.” He paused for a while and I coughed loudly trying to get his attention. When he didn’t turn around quick enough, I lightly pushed my titties up against his back like people behind me were pushing causing our bodies to connect.
“Oh, I’m sorry,” I lied looking behind me at no one. “I’m so clumsy.” He looked back at me and smiled.
“Look, nigga. Get that otha shit taken care of and get at me later. Gone.” He placed the phone in the clip on his hip and gave me the once over. Everything was in order. I noticed immediately that he was a boss who liked to be in charge. “Strawberry Shortcake huh?” he said as he looked down at the game I was carrying. He pushed the PS3 game system toward the clerk. With one person before him I had to act quickly.
“It takes work tryin’ to be this sweet. I have to practice all the time.”
And then he said, “I hear you. But when you gonna have time to play a game since you comin’ wit a real nigga?”