A French Affair (3 page)

So why, dear God,
why
had she agreed to let Natalie go? It didn't matter that Natalie had begged to show her grandmother the quaint little village where Lilian and Luc had married, to be able to stay in the same grape-picker's cottage they'd occupied for the big occasion that Natalie had loved so much. What Natalie wanted and what was wise for her to do were two different things, and being put into the care of her maternal grandmother was definitely not wise. Which was why, in spite of Charlie's support for the scheme, she, Jessica, should have put her foot down and refused to let Natalie go.

And she might have, had it not been a convenient answer as to who was going to take care of Natalie during the first part of the Easter break. Both she and Charlie were working, Nikki was studying for her A levels and Harry was going camping with the school.

So Jessica had put her job before her daughter, farmed her out to a woman she knew she couldn't trust, and now, God help her, she would never see her little girl again.

‘Who was that on the phone?' Jessica asked, coming in from the garden just as Harry went on tiptoe to put the receiver down.

‘It was Dad,' he answered, turning his impish, freckled face up to her. With his deep blue eyes and unruly mop of sandy hair, he could be no-one else's son but Charlie's, he even pulled the same expressions as his father and was fast developing, Jessica had noticed, a similar sense of humour. ‘He said,' Harry continued, trotting back across the kitchen to his art homework, ‘that he's just picked up your car from the garage and he'll be home . . . Um, I forget what time he
said. No, I know, he said in about ten minutes.'

‘Did he mention if Nikki was with him?' Jessica asked, starting to rinse the handful of tarragon she'd just picked from the herb pots she kept on the patio.

When she received no answer she glanced over to the long, ten-seater table that took up most of the kitchen's conservatory extension and smiled to see how engrossed Harry was in the choosing of another crayon. They were spread out all over the place, along with his pencil cases and a drawing pad, while for once his Gameboy lay idle on top of his school bag beside him.

The conservatory, with its tall succulent plants and assortment of toys, was where the children ate their meals, often did their homework, occasionally watched TV and threw boisterous parties for friends on their birthdays. When they were just family Jessica and Charlie generally ate there too, since it was much easier than carrying meals upstairs to the formal dining area that was part of the large, elegantly furnished drawing room that ran from front to back of the house.

Harry's head suddenly came up. ‘Did you say something?' he asked, frowning curiously.

‘I asked if Nikki was with Dad?'

He shrugged. ‘I don't know.' His frown deepened. ‘Is she going to be reading the news too?' he asked.

Jessica smiled. ‘No. She's just helping out at the studios to earn some money for the summer.'

‘Oh,' he said, then put his chin in his hand and stared thoughtfully into space. ‘Mum?' he said after a while.

‘Yes,' she answered, selecting a knife from the heavy wood block to start chopping.

‘I've been thinking.'

‘What about?'

‘Getting married.'

‘Really?' she replied. ‘Do you have anyone in mind?'

‘No, but it's up to me to carry on the family name, because I'm the only boy. So if I'm going to have children I have to get married.'

‘There's no rush,' she assured him.

He was clearly still deep in his reverie. ‘I think I'm probably into older women,' he said, quite seriously.

Jessica choked back a laugh. ‘Why do you
say that?' she asked.

He shrugged. ‘Girls my age are just stupid. I mean, Sophie Towers is all right, sometimes, and I suppose Elinor Curtis is OK, when she's not picking her nose or trying to make me say I love her . . .' His dark eyes moved to his mother's. ‘I want to marry someone like Natalie,' he declared. ‘She was the best person in all the world, when she wasn't beating me up, and locking me out of the bathroom. And I didn't really mind when she bossed me around. And that's what wives do, isn't it? They boss their husbands around, and then the husband lays down the law and they have a fight. You know, like you and Dad.'

Jessica laughed through the tears in her eyes. ‘You think I boss Dad around?' she said.

He nodded earnestly. ‘All the time. I think he's a bit scared of you, actually.'

There was such a light of mischief in his eyes now that Jessica dropped the knife and went to scoop him up in her arms. ‘You are a terrible little rogue, Harry Moore,' she told him, hugging him hard.

‘That's what my teacher said,' he cheerfully replied, hugging her back.

Jessica's eyes closed. ‘And what did you do for her to say that?' she enquired, standing him on his chair so they were eye to eye.

He was a picture of innocence. ‘I don't know,' he answered, ‘she just said it.'

Jessica regarded him suspiciously.

‘Honest,' he cried. ‘I didn't do anything.' A moment later his eyes went down. ‘Well, it might have been because I told her she should stand in the corner for swearing. She said bloody, Mum, and that's swearing, isn't it?'

‘It could be, depending on the context.'

Harry's eyes opened wide with indignation. ‘She said that we were all going to visit the Bloody Tower next term. Honest, that's what she said. So I put up my hand and told her she should stand in the corner.'

Jessica watched him and waited for the grin. It wasn't long in coming. ‘You knew very well she wasn't swearing, didn't you?' she said, starting to tickle him.

‘She thought I was serious though,' he laughed, and yelped as he tried to break free. ‘Let me go, or I'll fart,' he cried.

Jessica laughed again and pulled him into a bear hug. ‘You are such a boy!' she told him as he howled with laughter. Then suddenly he was leaping to the floor as the front door slammed upstairs. ‘Here's Dad,' he shouted. ‘Dad! Dad! Guess what?'

As he thundered up to the hall Jessica turned back to the chopping board, still smiling, but aware of the constant heaviness in her heart that she knew would never go away. Natalie should be running up there with him, fighting to get to her father first, the way she always had. Then, hearing Charlie's shout of triumph as Harry told him how many runs he'd scored in cricket that day, Jessica found herself almost resenting
the way they were able to behave as though nothing bad had happened to their family at all.

Looking up as Nikki came into the kitchen, she said, ‘Hi darling, how did it go today?'

Nikki was scowling down at her mobile phone, then her cheeks suddenly turned crimson as she shouted, ‘Dad! Did you send this?' She spun round as Charlie came down the stairs behind her.

‘Send what?' he asked, all innocence.

‘It was you,' she cried, laughing in spite of herself. ‘Oh Mum, he is like soooo embarrassing.'

The fact that Nikki had stormed off in a strop this morning, without even saying goodbye to her mother, was clearly forgotten, and Jessica found herself smiling at the twinkle in Charlie's blue eyes as he looked at his daughter. As usual he seemed to be filling the room, not only with his imposing physique, but with the very energy of his presence. She'd often thought how everything felt safe when he was around, and almost anything seemed possible. That was before, of course, because now almost nothing felt safe. However, that still didn't change the fact that he was a strikingly good-looking man, with strongly defined features that even in repose showed his inherent good nature, while the unruly thickness of his lustrous sandy hair was the delight of many a cartoonist – and apparently an irresistible magnet to female fingers, an imposition Jessica had been forced to live with over the years, to the point that she barely even noticed it any more.

‘What is it?' Harry was demanding, jumping up and down as he tried to grab the phone from Nikki's hand. ‘Let me see.'

‘No way.' Her deep brown eyes darted back to her father. ‘That is so not true,' she told him.

‘What isn't?' Harry wanted to know. ‘What did he say?'

‘It's got nothing to do with me,' Charlie informed her.

From his expression Jessica knew that whatever it was, it had everything to do with him.

‘How do you know that, when I haven't even told you what it is?' Nikki challenged.

Jessica laughed as Charlie staggered back. ‘I walked right into that,' he conceded, his eyes full of mischief and his smile as roguish as his son's.

Nikki banged his arm with her clenched fist. ‘It is so not true,' she said through her teeth.

‘Then what are you getting so worked up about?'

She blushed again. ‘I'm not. When did you send it? Oh my God, no-one saw you taking his picture, did they? Dad, please tell me no-one else knows, or I'll never be able to go back there.'

‘I was very discreet,' Charlie promised.

‘But he's looking straight at the camera!' Nikki protested. ‘He must have known you were taking it.'

‘Of course he did. I told him it was for me.'

Nikki's head fell back as she groaned. ‘That is it. I'm never setting foot in those studios again. Mum, he's totally out of order this time. You've got to speak to him. Look!' she demanded, shoving the phone at Jessica.

When Jessica saw the heart-framed picture-text of Freddy Crossland, the new trainee reporter on the programme Charlie presented, though she understood Nikki's embarrassment, she had to smile. ‘He is pretty gorgeous,' she said, handing the phone back.

Before Nikki could take it Harry grabbed it. ‘That's Freddy!' he declared. ‘He's really cool, Nik. I think you should marry him.'

Charlie's eyes were brimful of laughter, but as they met Jessica's she couldn't help noticing how they sobered again. Was her expression unwelcoming, she wondered, or had the pain stolen into her eyes without her realising? He hated to see it because it reminded him of his own, and though she had not a moment's doubt about how much he was suffering, he was becoming quite practised now at avoiding it. In fact, they almost never talked about what had happened, at least not in a direct sense, and it sometimes scared her to think of the grief he had bottled up inside, for he had still barely allowed any of it to come out.

‘Hi, honey, I'm home,' he drawled, in a bad American accent.

‘Cue the gin and tonic,' she replied, rolling her eyes.

‘Don't forget the pipe and slippers,' he reminded her, as Harry darted to the fridge to dispense some ice.

‘If you really smoked a pipe I'd leave home,' Nikki told him. ‘I think they're revolting.'

Charlie was opening the drinks cupboard as Jessica filled a bowl with nuts. ‘It's time you left home anyway,' he told Nikki. ‘You're eighteen next month, and I can't afford you any more.'

‘Take no notice of him,' Jessica said, unable to tolerate even a joke about Nikki going.

‘Mum, what am I going to do about this picture?' Nikki wailed, her lovely gamine features drawn and desperate. ‘If Freddy knows Dad took it for me . . . Oh God, I can't bear it. I mean, I am like so not interested in him . . .'

‘Oh yes you are,' Harry informed her, plonking a bowl of ice down next to his father. ‘I heard you telling Sonya the other day how fit you think he is . . .'

‘You little devil, you've been eavesdropping again!' Nikki cried, advancing on him.

‘I was not,' he shrieked, running round the table. ‘Your bedroom door was open, so I couldn't help hearing. Mum! Mum! Get her off, she's going to kill me and I can't help it if she's in love with Freddy Crossland, can I?'

As he dashed out into the garden with Nikki hard on his heels, Jessica took the drink Charlie was passing her, saying, ‘Well, what do you know? She seems to be speaking to me again.'

Charlie smiled and touched his glass to hers. After they'd both taken a sip he said, ‘She's in the throes of first love. Remember what that feels like?'

‘Mm, I think so,' Jessica responded, looking at him.

To her dismay his eyes moved away, showing again his reluctance to engage with her, so going to put her arms around him she said, ‘Don't I get a kiss?'

As his mouth came to hers she was aware of how tense he was, but he didn't try to pull away, nor did he protest when she tightened her embrace, he merely held her and kissed her until she broke away.

‘So is Freddy interested in her?' she asked, turning to watch Nikki rolling Harry about on the grass.

‘When she bends over in front of him like that, exposing a pink lacy thong and all that ripe young flesh,' Charlie answered, ‘I think it would be hard for him not to be.'

‘So you decided to help things along?'

‘Let's just say Isensed he was having a bit of a problem with me being her father, so I thought I'd set him straight. I took the picture, told him she'd asked me to, and now he knows I'm cool with it he'll probably get round to asking her out.'

‘Subtlety was never your strong point,' she commented, turning aside to check the chicken she had slowly poaching on the hob. ‘Anyway, I thought you were at your own office today, not the studio.'

‘I was, I just popped across the road to pick up Nikki when we'd finished.' Then, eyeing her critically as she bent over to put a bowl in the dishwasher, he said, ‘Have you lost more weight?'

‘I don't know,' she said, straightening up. ‘Do I look as though I have?'

He shrugged, and took another sip of his drink. ‘Incidentally, I ran into Pru Janssen outside. She invited us over for supper tonight, if we want to go. Just a few of the gang. Impromptu, dead casual.'

Jessica turned to him in surprise. ‘I thought you wanted to have dinner as a family,' she said. ‘I've started preparing it now.'