A Cup of Comfort for Couples (2 page)

“Six-thirty?”

“That works,” I agreed.

We met at the cavernous entrance, Ray already with a green flat cart in tow. He looked good, his yellow golf shirt setting off a nice tan. We flashed our cards at the attendant, ID pictures visible, and I trailed Ray and the cart as he walked purposefully to the back of the store, the aroma of fresh muffins wafting toward us.

“Wow,” I gasped at all the six packs and twelve packs of juices and soft drinks he swung onto the cart.

“Big party,” he said, moving to the section of paper products for plates and cups, then the frozen food section for meatballs and shrimp. Fresh fruit next: blueberries, strawberries, cantaloupe, watermelons, bananas.

I touched his shoulder. “Those are going to be beautiful fruit trays.”

“Hope so.”

Ray took good care of his customers. I sensed he would take good care of me as well. Shopping with him, I felt a surprising intimacy as I watched him do his thing as the owner of a small restaurant.

We continued to date, mixing Costco runs with movies, theater, fall hikes, and winter sports. I met his adult children; he met my teenagers. Then one day at Costco, when we'd been dating five months, he grabbed a regular, redhandled shopping cart, not a green flat cart. “I need to get a few things for my apartment,” he said and proceeded to load a box of bottled water, a two-loaf pack of whole-grain bread, eggs, and a jar of peanut butter.

When we reached the frozen food section, he held up a bag of chicken burritos. “Your kids like these?” he asked.

“How nice. They'd love them.”

He tossed them in the cart.

We stopped next at the tables of fruit. “Like cantaloupe?” he asked, holding up a net with three melons. “I could keep one at my place and you could take two home.”

My stomach flip-flopped. What was going on? He was shopping for
us
.

He pushed the cart to the center of the store where a dozen tables were piled high with clothes, rummaged through a stack of golf shirts, and came up with a green one and a white one. “Which do you think?” he asked, holding them up.

“Either one,” I assured him. He'd look terrific in both.

He tossed them in the cart and then moved to a table of women's sweaters. “Like any of these?” he asked.

I went weak-kneed, now certain of the shift in our relationship. This was no business run. He was loading a cart with his and her things.

The red turtleneck I picked up felt as soft as a kitten's fur against my cheek.

“I like you in red. You want it?” Ray nodded toward the cart.

I'd never considered Costco a place to buy clothes. I was learning so much this trip I could hardly breathe. With Christmas approaching, the red sweater would be fun, especially if I were wearing it to holiday celebrations with Ray. We were definitely an item.

Christmas came, then New Year's, then Valentine's. Ray and I spent as much time together as possible. My kids adored him and so did I.

“You think you'll get married?” a girlfriend at the school where I taught asked.

I shrugged. My first marriage had been a dismal, gut-wrenching experience, and I wasn't eager to try that again. Nor had Ray dropped to one knee and proposed. I was fine with the status quo.

At least I thought I was. Recently, though, everywhere I went I noticed diamond earrings, diamond necklaces, diamond rings. I wasn't ready to pick up a copy of
Modern Bride
, but something was going on.

Ray did not appear to share my obsession. When I shopped with him for his mom's birthday gift, he didn't even slow down as we passed the Zales, not to mention Tiffany.

That night we headed off to Costco for some laundry detergent, bathroom supplies, and a Polish dog. We flashed our cards as usual, but for once Ray didn't grab a cart. Assuming he'd forgotten, I turned back to get one. Gently but firmly he took my arm. In seconds he'd propelled me to the jewelry case. “See anything you like?” he asked.

A necklace for my June birthday? No, too early. I suddenly felt dizzy.

“I kind of like that one.” He pointed to a perfect solitaire diamond set in a platinum band.

My mouth went dry.

“Do you want to look at it?”

I nodded.

He strode off and returned within seconds with a red-vested clerk who unlocked the case for us.

“That one.” Ray pointed to the solitaire.

The clerk handed it to him.

“Want to try it on?” Ray threw me his fabulous crooked smile.

“Rings never fit me. I have huge knuckles like my dad.” My voice trembled as I gazed at the ring he held out to me.

Ray steadied my left hand and slipped it on.

I stared at it. How could it fit so perfectly? And be so beautiful? Even in the fluorescent lighting of Costco, it sparkled like a meteor shower.

“What do you think?” Ray asked.

I answered with a kiss. Yes, right there in Costco. I could easily imagine our future. The wedding wouldn't be there, of course, but perhaps for our first anniversary Ray would say, “Want to go to Costco?”

And I wouldn't be able to think of anything more romantic than sitting across from him at a long, stainless steel table, eating a Polish dog and celebrating our supersized love.

—
Samantha Ducloux Waltz

The Secret of Rugged Terrain

M
y baby's newborn squall pulled me from a deep sleep. I rubbed my eyes, pushed the covers back, and rolled from the comfort of our bed. Wake-up calls were so much easier a few years and several babies ago. We had five boys, and there were fifteen years between the oldest and youngest.

I bent over the bassinette and lifted my tiny son. Isaiah stopped crying; must've found the off switch.

“Is it morning already?” my husband, Lonny, asked from under our covers.

“It is now,” I said.

Lonny sat up in bed, fluffed my pillow, and patted the mattress next to him. “Come here, you two,” he said.

I handed him the swaddled newborn and curled in beside them. Isaiah settled into Lonny's chest. Lonny pulled the baby close, then tipped his own head and closed his eyes.

I admired their faces. The contrast was striking. Isaiah with his fresh, pink newborn skin. Unblemished. Dewey. Smooth. Lonny's complexion was tanned and rough. Lined. Like rugged terrain.

I kissed Lonny on the forehead and closed my eyes, too. As I huddled into the sweet warmth of my husband and son, I remembered back, long ago, when our marriage had been new and fresh — like the flesh of a newborn babe.

“Do you think this will last, Shawnelle? Being so happy?” Lonny asked.

We'd been married two weeks and were wrapped together in a deep, round futon chair. Our first apartment didn't have air conditioning, but we sat close anyway.

I took a bite of Lonny's cheese pizza. “Sure,” I said. “Why shouldn't it?”

“Just seems too good to be true,” he said.

I tousled his too-long hair. “Of course it will last.”

But life came at us hard and fast. Lonny worked to finish college. I went to work for an elementary school near campus while he finished his degree. Then Lonny graduated, and we moved to mid-Michigan. New jobs. New community. I went back to school. A barrage of changes rushed at us, and we didn't know how to manage the stress together. We handled our own stuff in our own ways, and by the time we pulled that top-tier wedding cake from the freezer to celebrate our first anniversary, our marriage had grown chilly, too. We'd started to pick at one another, noticing the shortcomings and looking past the good things.

One day Lonny came home from work. Late. He'd missed dinner and been too busy to call. He kicked off his shoes, tossed his briefcase to the floor, padded to the dining room, and pecked me on the cheek.

“Sorry,” he said. “Tough day. How was yours?”

“Long,” I said. “Will you please put your shoes in the closet? I've picked them up a dozen times this week.”

“Sure, after I grab something to eat,” he said.

First he was late. Then the shoes. “How about now?” I said.

“How about later?” he said.

“How about I toss them on the lawn?”

“How about you finish the trim in the living room? Geesh, Shawnelle, I can't believe you painted the room and left the trim undone. Can't you finish what you start?”

He plunked down his plate on the table, and we ate in silence. I wished we could talk, but I couldn't guarantee that my words would be kind. I wanted them to be, but all I could think about were those darned shoes.

Such was our life. We weren't unhappy. But we weren't happy, either. We moved through life and time. Bought a house. Had a baby. There were good times, too, and neither of us wanted to bail. But we bickered constantly, and we were keenly aware of and quick to point out one another's shortcomings. We went on like this for a while — drawing out the flaws and glossing over the good stuff.

We'd been married a couple of years when I woke one morning, plodded to the bathroom, and perched on the side of the tub. It had been a long, sleepless night. The baby had a marathon earache and hadn't rested. I was still taking classes and had a test that afternoon. Lonny had worked late . . . again. I hadn't studied. The cupboards rivaled Mother Hubbard's. And the laundry was piled high.

I twisted the hot-water knob and rested my head in my lap while the water charged into the tub. When I lifted my head, I saw them. The socks. The dirty, grungy, left-on-the-floor athletic socks. And they weren't alone. There were also jeans, a T-shirt, and underwear. My pulse quickened.

“Lonny,” I called. I hoped my agitation would stretch to the bedroom. “You left a pile of dirty laundry on the bathroom floor for me to pick up! How many times do I have to ask you?” My tone was sharp as glass as I poked at the lump of clothes with my bare toe. “I have so much to do today.”

There was no response from the bedroom.

I grabbed the clothes and stalked down the hall. I pulled open the closet door and flipped the lid on the hamper that stood inside. As I pushed the clothes deep into the hamper, a white slip of paper wafted from the wicker and settled at my feet. I bent to pick it up.

It was a grocery receipt, from Lonny's jean pocket. My eyes roved over the faint purple print. Milk. Eggs. Bread. Lonny had worked late and done the shopping afterward — so I didn't have to.

Suddenly, the socks didn't seem like such a big deal.

I pushed the closet door shut and walked to the bedroom. I pulled back the covers on the bed and slid in beside my husband.

“Lonny,” I said. “Wake up. We need to talk.”

“What's up?” he murmured.

“I need to tell you that I'm sorry. I'm sorry for looking at the socks instead of your heart. Will you forgive me?”

“What are you talking about?” he asked. He sat up and squinted.

“I don't always see the good man you are. I fuss over small things. I'm sorry. And I love you.”

“I love you, too. And you're right. We do need to focus on the good in each other.” Lonny pulled me close. “We have a lot of work to do. But let's start in an hour or so.” Then he gave me a gentle push. “Now, go away and let me sleep for a few more minutes. And look in the cupboard. Peanut butter Captain Crunch. Your favorite.”

Lonny was right. We did have a lot of work to do. But we rolled up our sleeves and pushed ahead. We'd found our secret. We'd seen our need to look at one another's overall character — rather than the flaws.

That day was eighteen years ago. The years have blown by. We've learned to pull together. It didn't come easy. We've had some tough times. But the reward has been sweet.

I listened for Isaiah's soft, even breath. When I knew that he was sleeping, I got up, lifted him, and returned him to the bassinette. Then I snuggled in beside Lonny. He wrapped his arms around me. The way he has for a very long time.

Our marriage isn't newborn. It's not unblemished or fresh. It hasn't always been smooth. But I'm glad. I wouldn't want a newborn marriage again.

I'm happy for where we are.

I'm happy for where we've been.

There's a lot of love along that rugged terrain.

—
Shawnelle Eliasen