Mark said, 'We still don't know who he really was, but I guess in many ways it doesn't matter. We know what he did to people, the choices he forced them to make.'
She was trembling again, but she tried to keep her voice calm.
'Right.'
Mark looked at her.
'The impossible choices,' he said.
For a moment, the panic threatened to overwhelm her. He knew. Jodie stared at him, and he stared back. She was frozen. But there was a sympathy in his face which was entirely different from the comfort offered by the other people here. It was genuine, and it was full of understanding. Despite herself, Jodie felt relief. She wanted to fall into that look, collapse and rest for a while. Instead, she felt her face crumple, and she began to cry.
'It's okay,' he said.
She hadn't meant to lie in the interview; it had been more about what she didn't say than what she did, and the omission had been natural. When she'd told the policeman who interviewed her that the man had locked her in the storeroom, that was true. And when he'd asked what happened next, she'd told him that after a while she'd heard Scott begin screaming, and that was also true. He hadn't asked what had happened in between.
When she'd been locked in the storeroom, the voice had told her not to think about certain things, to put them out of her head; and that really was all she'd done. At the time, what mattered had been getting out of there alive, and some things - her guilt and shame - weren't going to help her. The voice's advice had been practical and reassuring.
Don't think about that.
She had to get out of the situation, and she had to do everything she could to make sure they were both okay. But ultimately, that
she
was okay.
So she had discarded the emotions and feelings that would hinder her in that. Very deliberately, she had tried not to think about what happened when the man in the devil mask had come back to the storeroom. About the choice she'd had to make. And about how quickly the voice had made the decision on her behalf.
Scott. The voice had told her to remember the pain he was in, to use it when it came down to it, and she had. But now those screams filled her thoughts. The voice had told her to forget about the choice to save her own life, and now, below the surface, she could think of little else.
I'm so sorry.
Mark put his hand on her shoulder while she cried.
'It's okay,' he repeated softly. 'That way I see it, that kind of thing is nobody else's business. The people involved have to live with the consequences. It's not for anybody else to judge.'
Jodie was looking at the ground. But she nodded.
After a moment, Mark gave her shoulder a slight squeeze, then took his hand away. 'Here.'
He was holding something out to her. Jodie expected to see the envelope he'd been holding, but instead he was offering her a small card. She took it. A business card. It had his name and departmental telephone number on it. The implication was clear.
'Thank you,' she said.
'If you ever want to talk,' he said, 'you know where to find me.'
'Thank you.'
'It's okay.' He stepped back, ready to leave. 'Take care of yourself, Jodie.'
She noticed that he was now holding the envelope tightly against his stomach. Guarding it, almost.
'What's that?' Jodie asked.
He smiled at her gently.
'Something for another day,' he said.
Table of Contents
2 DECEMBER - 14 HOURS UNTIL DAWN
3 DECEMBER - EIGHT MINUTES AFTER DAWN
3 DECEMBER - 22 HOURS, 40 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
3 DECEMBER - 21 HOURS, 10 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
3 DECEMBER - 21 HOURS UNTIL DAWN
3 DECEMBER - 19 HOURS, 25 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
3 DECEMBER - 17 HOURS, 25 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
3 DECEMBER - 16 HOURS, 50 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
3 DECEMBER - 15 HOURS, 50 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
3 DECEMBER - 14 HOURS, 50 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
3 DECEMBER - 13 HOURS, 50 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
3 DECEMBER - 12 HOURS, 20 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
3 DECEMBER - 12 HOURS, 5 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
3 DECEMBER - 10 HOURS, 50 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
3 DECEMBER - 9 HOURS, 50 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
3 DECEMBER - 8 HOURS, 40 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 6 HOURS, 35 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 5 HOURS, 35 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 5 HOURS, 20 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 5 HOURS, 5 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 4 HOURS, 50 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 4 HOURS, 30 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 4 HOURS, 20 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 4 HOURS UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 3 HOURS, 50 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 3 HOURS, 20 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 3 HOURS, 10 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 2 HOURS, 50 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 2 HOURS, 40 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 2 HOURS, 25 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 2 HOURS, 20 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 2 HOURS, 15 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 2 HOURS, 10 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 1 HOUR, 50 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 1 HOUR, 30 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 1 HOUR UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 50 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 45 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 32 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 30 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 29 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 28 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 22 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - 10 MINUTES UNTIL DAWN
4 DECEMBER - DAWN
4 DECEMBER - TEN MINUTES PAST DAWN