12.Deadly.Little.Secrets.2012 (13 page)

Three minutes passed, and he responded: “BABE—I am so sorry—I guess I was judging your statement. I am sorry! I CAN & WILL meet you and the girls at Jo Ann’s office. OK? I am NOT trying to slap your hand. I promise.”

That afternoon, the e-mails flew back and forth, Matt saying he felt like he walked on eggshells around Kari but insisting that he didn’t want to make her feel bad. “I am sorry. I hope the meeting with Jo Ann will help.” He then suggested that Kari see a counselor through his work, but she replied: “Thanks but no thanks. I don’t want to come to your work to get help. I can do it on my own.”

A little before four, Kari and the girls arrived at Jo Ann Bristol’s office in downtown Waco. When Matt walked in, he sat with the girls in the waiting room, while Kari went inside the private office to talk to the therapist she hadn’t visited in six years, not since a year after Kassidy’s death.

Assessing Kari, Bristol noted her patient’s appearance. Kari was well dressed, her hair combed, her makeup on. That was important, an indication of how Kari felt about herself, one that showed she cared about how she looked. As they talked, it became apparent that much was going well in Kari’s life. She was proud of her success with her new diet, mentioning that she was down seventeen pounds that morning. All was well at work, and Kari talked excitedly about her job interview that coming Friday. When the conversation turned to Kensi and Grace, Kari sounded proud, saying both girls were doing well in school.

If Bristol was confused about why Kari was there, she ultimately focused on the reason. “Kari said there were problems in her marriage,” Bristol would say later. “That morning, Matt left the house without saying he loved her. He wasn’t interested in her sexually and had no desire to be with her that way.”

“I’ve talked to Matt about getting our marriage on track,” Kari confided. “But he said, ‘Now you’re ready, but I was ready for a long time. It will take me a while to catch up.’ ”

As she talked, Kari brought up the e-mail Matt had sent, the one in which he accused her of being responsible for their daughter’s death. Away from Matt’s prying ears, Kari told her counselor about her anxiety attacks, including the incident in the car, when Kari had opened the door and Matt grabbed her. “We were stopped. I just needed air,” Kari said, laughing at the idea that Matt thought she might jump. Bristol asked Kari if she felt at all suicidal, and Kari said, “No.”

Then the conversation took a strange turn, as Kari confided in Bristol about the night before, when she’d found crushed pills in Matt’s briefcase. Kari said she’d confronted Matt, and he’d told her that the pills had come from WCY, but Kari admitted that she didn’t believe him. “I asked him what they were, and he said, ‘Why do you want to know?’ I told him, ‘Jo Ann will want to know.’ ” Worried about the pills, Kari said that she woke up in the middle of the night and went looking for them. While she was looking Matt walked in and asked what she was doing.

“I told him, ‘I’m looking for the pills because Jo Ann will want to know what they are.’ ” At that point, Kari said Matt told her that he’d gotten rid of them and that he’d reported to WCY what the residents were doing.

There was more. “I think Matt’s having an affair,” Kari said. “And I think Matt’s planning to kill me.”

“Would you say that again?” Bristol asked.

“I think Matt’s having an affair,” Kari said. “And I think Matt is planning to kill me.”

Yet as soon as she uttered those words a second time, Kari did what she’d done throughout her marriage when it came to suspicions about her husband—she quickly made an about-face. “No, he’s not. That’s ridiculous. I know better than that,” she said. “Matt would never do anything like that. He wouldn’t.”

Listening to Kari, Bristol apparently accepted that her patient hadn’t really meant what she’d said because she took no action other than to make suggestions for things Kari and Matt could do together, exercises to help them become closer. One was that Matt and Kari put in writing the things they loved about each other. A second was to rekindle the flame by indulging in the things they enjoyed when they had first met.

Despite that brief interlude when she’d confessed her fears, Kari insisted she was well, saying she was in a better place than she had been in the past, “with regard to the sorrow over Kassidy’s death.” In fact, Kari felt so at peace with the loss of her daughter that she repeated what she’d told Linda: “I’d like to work with other parents who’ve lost children. I think that may be my calling.”

As the last of their minutes together clicked off the clock, Kari talked again about her girls, how she wanted to spend more time with them. Yet when the session came to an end, Bristol was concerned enough about what Kari had said to ask her to call on Friday, so they could talk on the phone if Kari was still having obsessive thoughts about Matt.

When they opened the door, there stood Matt Baker, the subject of Kari’s fears, in the waiting area with Kensi and Grace.

Later that afternoon, Kari called Jill. “Kari said she felt more optimistic about her relationship with Matt,” says Jill. “She said she was trying to be more adventurous in the bedroom with him, but that he still wasn’t interested. But she said that she really wanted to make the marriage work.”

When Kari called Linda, she told her she’d talked to Bristol. Kari didn’t, however, voice any of the concerns she’d confided in her therapist, and Linda, seeing the session as private, didn’t ask any questions. Later, that was something else Linda would regret. “If Kari had told me what was going on, I would have pulled her out of that house by the hair,” Linda says, shaking her head slightly. “I knew something was wrong, but she didn’t tell me how bad it actually was.”

Chapter 20

A
t 8:04 the following morning, Wednesday, Matt e-mailed Kari: “Hope you have a good day. Love you.”

Despite her assurances to Jo Ann Bristol that she couldn’t imagine Matt’s hurting her, doubts about Matt apparently continued to plague Kari. Midmorning at Spring Valley Elementary, she again confided in her friend Shae while they were on the playground supervising during recess. Grabbing Shae’s hand, Kari said, “I almost called you to come get the girls. I was thinking of leaving Matt. I think he’s having an affair, and I found some pills. I’m frightened that Matt’s planning to kill me.”

Then, as she did with Bristol, however, Kari immediately retracted her accusations, saying, “But I know that’s ridiculous.”

As worried as Shae was, she decided not to push Kari to talk about it then. In three days, on Saturday, they were planning to do a breast cancer walk with other third-grade teachers, and Shae thought that would be a better time to try to get Kari to open up. Shae had no way of knowing that Saturday would be too late.

That Wednesday, when Kari talked to Shae would turn out to be a good day in at least one way; Kari’s grandmother was battling cancer, and that morning she received the report they’d all been hoping for, that the doctors found her cancer-free. Kari appeared overjoyed as she told her friends. Although she complained of a headache, when she talked to Jill on the phone, Kari sounded upbeat. Perhaps her grandmother’s good news made Kari feel better about life in general, including her marriage, because she then went on to tell Jill again that she was determined to work the problems out with Matt. “I’m going to do whatever I can,” she said. Then she thanked her friend. “I really appreciate having you to talk to.”

At 12:19, Kari e-mailed Matt, apologizing for not responding to his morning e-mail sooner, saying she’d been busy teaching math. She’d called earlier from out on the playground and said it was because she’d missed him. “I haven’t felt like my heart is going to jump out of my chest today. That’s good.”

“Good—maybe your heart will only jump inside your body ;-),” he responded.

“I wish you would make my heart jump. :),” she answered.

When he replied, “I do,” Kari corrected herself. “Sorry, I meant to say I wish
I
made
your
heart jump.”

“Very funny,” he replied.

At 1:04, Kari again e-mailed Matt. She’d sent him a message earlier, suggesting a sexual liaison for the evening, and he hadn’t e-mailed her in return. Now she wondered, “Did you get my e-mail? Or maybe that is your answer, that you don’t want me to do anything with you tonight.”

“Whatever,” Matt wrote back. “I just got both e-mails right now—we’ll see what we can do tonight.” A week earlier, Matt had talked about picking up some supplies to augment their sex life. Now he typed, “Might have to use what we used before. :-)”

T
he following morning, Thursday, Kari e-mailed Matt, but he didn’t respond. She wanted him to do what Bristol had recommended, to write down the reasons he loved her. “I know you think that is stupid, but if you don’t mind, sometimes it is good to just see the reasons why a person loves you. I am not saying I doubt your love. I hope you understand and can do this for me. You used to write me little notes all the time telling me you love me . . . I love you.”

A little more than half an hour later, Matt replied: “I did not get that other e-mail. OK—if your [sic] force me to :-) - here are a few:

“I love that you make me laugh.

“I love the time we spend together.

“I enjoy the family we have created—how beautiful they are.

“I love you for loving me.

“I love that you are my best friend.

“I know that these are few—but very important. I DO love you. You are my wife. I love you.”

When Kari responded, she sounded happy: “Thanks for putting those down. I guess sometimes I just need to be reminded why you fell in love with me. I know that I used to not ask this, but I really think I am a different person today. I need to hear more from you. I am sure you are thinking what happened to the woman that I married? :) I guess I want more from you. NO. I do want more from you.

“When we first met, you used to always do special little things to tell me you love me. I guess I just miss that.

“Well my heart slowed down a little this morning. I think I know why I get the way I do. I really just miss being with you, and I start thinking about being away from you all day, and I start feeling strange. I wish there was a way we could work together. I know that can’t happen, but it doesn’t hurt to wish. I love you.”

In her final e-mail of the afternoon, at 2:29, Kari wrote: “We will just talk when I get home. I love you.”

During Kari’s phone call to Jill that afternoon, she sounded as if her life had turned an important corner and that the future looked brighter. “She was elated,” says Jill. “Kari said things were better between her and Matt, that they were patching things up. I was happy for her.”

On the way out the door at school, one of the other teachers approached Kari to remind her about the breast cancer walk coming up in two days, on Saturday morning. “I’d like to, but I need to talk to Matt,” she said. “I’ll let you know.”

Chapter 21

F
riday, April 7, 2006, was a hot day in central Texas. The thermostat was projected to climb to ninety-one, just three degrees below the 1972 record for that date. That morning, Jill called Kari but didn’t get an answer. At 8:28, Linda e-mailed Kari, hoping to pump her up before her job interview that afternoon.

“Good luck,” Linda typed. “Call me when it’s over.”

“Okay,” Kari responded. “I’m so nervous, I didn’t sleep at all last night. In fact, I couldn’t remember if I took a sleepy pill at 11:40, so I took another one and now I think two, so my head feels strange. I hope they love me.”

“Don’t freak yourself out!” Linda responded. “You are a terrific teacher and you interview very well. Remember that you don’t have to have this. Don’t put so much stress on yourself.” At that, Linda talked about wanting to spend time shopping with Kensi for her birthday. They discussed plans. “I do love those girls!!!!!!!!” Linda said. “I’ve decided both girls need time with Grammy!”

Meanwhile, at 8:30, Matt Baker called Vanessa at her parents’ home. From March 30 through that Friday, April 7, Matt had called the Bulls’s house seven times, talking for a total of sixty-three minutes.

T
hat morning at school, Kari looked happy. She stopped at Shae’s classroom about 11:15 with a slice of pizza for her. They came in twos and Kari, on her diet, ate one and offered the other to her friend. Afterward, she exchanged e-mails with some of the other teachers about their plans for workshops that summer, Kari saying she planned to skip the one in June and look for another. Then, she told one of her fellow third-grade teachers that she’d decided not to do the Walk for a Cure breast cancer event the following day. “We’re having a celebration for my grandmother on Saturday,” Kari said. “I really want to be there.”

That afternoon, Kari left Spring Valley at 12:30, stopping on Crested Butte to change into a suit to wear for her interview for the language arts slot. Matt would later say he was there, that they had a snack before she left to drive to Midway Middle School.

At 1:30, Todd Monsey waited at the school’s front doors when Kari arrived. She was nervous and excited, and she’d asked him to take her in and introduce her since he taught history at the school. They talked, and Kari joked, saying that if she got the job, they could be coteachers, and that they’d be so good at it that they’d end up on
Oprah
as teachers of the year. Todd walked Kari to the principal’s office and introduced her to the secretary, then he left Kari in the waiting area. Later, the secretary would say that Kari appeared happy, enthused about the prospect of teaching seventh-grade English and talking about Kensi and Grace.

After the interview, when Kari walked toward the front doors, she saw Todd again. “How’d it go?” he asked.

“Great,” she said, raising her hand. He smacked it in a high five. Seconds later, she was out the door and on her way home.

“I rocked,” Kari said, when she called Linda. “I was so good. I slam-dunked it!”

“See, I told you that you would.” Linda laughed, relieved to hear Kari happy after the past difficult weeks. “Way to go, Kari!”

As soon as Kari could, she e-mailed Todd asking him to check on how she’d done. “Go in there and find out if I got the job,” she said.

Later, when Kari called, her friend had good news. “They were blown away,” he responded. “You’re one of those being considered for the job.”

“Yes,” Kari said. “Oprah, here we come!”

Minutes later, Kari walked into Walmart. Shannon Gamble was there shopping when she saw her son’s favorite teacher. They talked briefly, Shannon saying for not the first time how delighted she was that her son had passed the standardized test and that she appreciated all Kari had done for him. Shannon noticed how cheerful Kari looked, and they parted as Kari hurried to pick up a few things.

A short time later, Kari logged onto her school e-mail account to send a letter to Midway’s principal, thanking him for the interview. “I felt the interview went very well,” she wrote. “I was so glad to get to meet some of your great teachers . . . Thank you again for this opportunity, and I look forward to hearing from you. Kari Baker.”

Yet at some point late that afternoon, something must have happened, something troubling. For by the time Kari was seen again, her mood was decidedly darker.

T
hat afternoon, one of the other moms, Kim Johnson, saw Kari and Matt walk through the door into the Family Y’s pool area for Kensi’s swim team at 5:15 and sit in the bleachers with Grace. Immediately, Kim knew something was wrong. On any other evening, Kari would have walked over to Kim, to sit with her and talk. On this evening, Matt and Kari kept to themselves. “Her eyes were red,” Kim said. She also noticed that things seemed not right between Matt and Kari. “You could have cut the tension with a knife.”

As Kim watched, Kari put her head in her hands and sighed. Without explaining, Matt walked over to Kim and took her youngest daughter and Grace to the vending machines. A short while later, he returned and walked over to Kari. The two girls were running around, and Kim pulled them to the side and told them not to bother Kari.

“Is she all right?” Kim mouthed at Matt, when Kari again put her head in her hands and stared down at her lap.

“No,” Matt mouthed. “I’m going to take her out for some air.” At that, he bent down, and pulled Kari up by her arm, then walked her outside to the hallway. To Kim, it didn’t appear that Kari was ill but rather that she and Matt had been arguing.

In the hallway, Kari sat on a black leather coach. Another mother walked up and began talking. The second mom, too, noticed Kari’s red eyes. The woman was upset with the swim coach and wanted Kari’s feedback. Matt was off with Grace at the time.

“This is confidential,” the woman said.

“Everyone knows you can trust the Bakers,” Kari replied, her inflection sarcastic.

Moments later, Matt returned with Grace, and the other woman, too, sensed a “distance” between Matt and Kari.

Practice ended, and the Bakers left the Y that evening. Matt would say later that at 6:45, he and Kari, together with the girls, pulled into a small pizza restaurant, Rosati’s, close to the Walmart where just hours earlier Kari had been happy when she saw Shannon Gamble. The plan was to pick up pizza, but the wait was too long, and they left, instead driving through McDonald’s, where the girls asked for Happy Meals.

All Kari had to eat that evening, he’d later say, were two french fries, which she threw up after they got home. From that point on, Matt, Kari, and the two girls were alone inside the house on Crested Butte. The next anyone heard from them was when Matt picked up the telephone just after midnight and dialed 911.