Authors: Jolene Perry
He shakes his head. “Perhaps you should wear
something more appropriate next time
.”
“Then what would you have to thi
nk about when you went to bed at
night?”
“Kay-Kay.”
I stick my tongue out. “You fucking love me. I’m charming. Now teach me how to surf already before my nipples start showing the change in temperature.”
“You’re incorrigible.”
He slides on the board behind me and slowly stands up. We adjust ourselves so we’re balanced and the board doesn’t wobble with our shifts.
“Okay,” he says, leaning over to grab the sail rope, “slowly pull this up until you can grab hold of the sail.”
I tug and four seconds later I’m back in the water.
“All of you kids are so impatient.”
“Oh really, grandpa, how can you even deal with us?” I slide back on the board and inch closer to him. I feel the heat of him against my back
,
and I want to lean into him so much, I can taste it.
We both don’t say anything for too long. He feels it too and I’m wondering what his next move will be. My eyes scan the beach and I see a bunch of campers at swim lessons. The guards are all either in the lake teaching or scanning the water where the classes are. Jo’s staring at me way too hard
,
so I don’t even pause when our eyes meet. She’s too far away to know if I actually see her or not. I think.
I look over my shoulder and see our camp director Irene peeking out at Alex and me from her tiny office. I wave and this time Alex falls in. He comes up sputtering.
“Can you keep your flailing under control, Kay-Kay?”
He slides up behind me and grabs the rope again. This time he guides my hand with his and together we pull the sail up. I grasp the bar and the board starts to move. I almost can’t believe it. I laugh and Alex moves closer to me as his hands grip the bar outside of mine. We’re sailing and it’s crazy and amazing and I love every second of it.
“Head us back to the shore,” he says after we’ve been up for a few minutes.
“Why? This is so much fun. I wish I could stay here forever.” I can’t help myself, I wiggle my butt closer to him. Closer to… oops.
“Yeah. I’ve had about all I can take.” He jumps off the board and swims the rest of the way to shore.
By the time I’ve navigated back onto the beach, he’s standing with my towel open and looking out at the campers swimming. I wrap the towel around me and tilt my head.
“
Aw, Alex, you can look away but that’s
not gonna work. Damage has already been done. I’ll see you later.”
Then I grab my clothes and move to the bathrooms near the dining hall. I lock myself into a stall and try to gain control of my erratic heartbeat. I lean my
head against the side wall and thump it a few times. I’m so very, very screwed.
It’s so hot they’ve cancelled all my classes. All the campers are in the lake for free swim. Only water activities are
planned for
today. I practice shooting
arrows
for a few minutes
,
but my T-shirt is completely soaked through with sweat.
Alex is giving a lesson on the windsurfing board without the sail. He’s helping campers practice their balance. Apparently, they have to do this for a long time before he actually lets them use the sail. I must have been lucky. My clothes are already off and I’m up to my waist in the water in my bikini before I hear my name called over the camp PA.
“Kay-Kay Benson to the office, please. Kay-Kay Benson to the office.”
Alex looks up and watches as I retreat back to the shore. I throw my damp T-shirt on and make my way slowly up the hill to Irene’s office.
“Have a seat,” she says and points to the chair opposite her desk. For some reason, this whole thing feels like a trip to the principal’s office.
She takes a drag off a cigarette
,
and I try not to fan the smoke from my face. Irene is eighty, married to an old guy who doesn’t recognize her anymore, and smokes like a chimney. The wrinkles around her mouth are puckered from the constant pursing around her cancer stick. But whatever, she’s old and runs a camp for girls. I can’t imagine she’s got that many vices.
“Kay-Kay, honey, I think you’re spending too much time with Alex.”
My mouth drops open. “Excuse me?”
She takes another drag then stubs out the half-smoked cigarette and lights another. “I’ve seen the two of you together
,
and I think you’re spending too much time with him. You’re giving the campers the wrong idea.”
“We’re friends.”
“I understand that, but our camp is about making ladies out of girls. And some of our gi
rls are confused by the message
that you’re sending when you spend time with Alex.”
I blink. So
,
I didn’t really see this one coming. I guess I should have
,
but what the hell does Irene c
are who I spend time with?
She should be happy Alex isn’t leering at the girls.
“I’m not sure what to say, Irene.”
She squints at me through her thick glasses. “Alex is a great deal older than you, dear. Are you sure you know what you’re doing?”
“Um, you mean being friends with him?”
Her lips curl inward
around her cigarette. “I’m
not sure this is the best summer for him to be making new friends.”
Whoa. Irene knows something. I want to ask. I should ask, but she won’t tell me crap. And weaseling it out of Alex will be a small miracle.
I release a breath. “Okay. I hear what you’re saying. I’ll try to spend less time with Alex in front of the girls.”
I stand up and leave her office before she can say anything else. Before she can fire me or tell me I shouldn’t spend time with him at all. My flip flops seem to
o
loud on the stairs down from her office. Alex meets me at the base of the hill.
“Everything okay?”
I shake my head and peer back at the office. “I’ll stop
by later tonight,” I mumble the
n flip flop past him and back up to my cabin.
“You’re really bailing on us?”
Sam
asks as she applies a second later of mascara. Two layers to go to the Little Minnow. I sorta love
Sam
.
“Yeah. I gotta talk to Alex. It’s sort of important.”
Jo is sitting on the sink beside us. No makeup, just fresh-faced and beautiful. “Do you wanna tell us why Irene called you in today?”
“Not really. I need to talk to Alex about it first.”
Jo looks at me with her big eyes and blinks too fast. She’s so fucking pragmatic. I want to get her wasted at least once—just to see what she’s actually like, because I don’t think she ever says or does something she doesn’t mean to.
Sam
drops her mascara. “Did Irene find you in bed with him?”
I laugh, relieved I have an excuse to talk to
Sam
instead of Jo. “God
,
no. That’d be so horrifying, I would’ve already left camp. Can you imagine the expression on her face?”
Sam
shrugs. “Whatevs. If he was on top, she’d probably love it. He’s got a hell of an ass.”
He
does
have a hell of an ass, but I don’t want
Sam
looking at it. Not that I have any claim on his ass, but I’ve got more of one than she does.
Jo is blushing so hard she looks like a tomato.
“
Sam
, clean it up. There are innocents present.”
Jo blushes even more. “I’m not that innocent.”
I raise an eyebrow. “Really? Did I miss something?”
Sam
smirks. “You miss everything. Didn’t you see the way she was looking at the bartender at the Little Minnow two nights ago? She practically needed a bucket to contain the drool.”
Tiny beads of sweat are popping up on Jo’s forehead.
“Christ, give the poor girl a break. Look how flustered she’s getting,” I say to
Sam. “Though any guy
that makes her realize there are more men than Safety-Jeff out there is a win.”
Sam
laughs and goes back to her mascara. “Poor Jo.”
“So I’ll meet up with you guys tomorrow morning, okay? For the walk?”
Sam
shakes her head. “Hell no, I’m not waking up an hour early for a frickin’ camper walk. Screw that noise.”
“You have to come. Alex can’t do it anymore and we need you.” I bat my puppy dog eyes at her and she flips me off.
Jo shrugs. “Guess we’ll have to do it ourselves. How come Alex can’t do it anymore?”
I bite my bottom lip. “It’s complicated. I’ll tell you on the walk tomorrow.” I look at
Sam
. “If you were coming, I’d tell you too. You’ll just have to find out later.”
Sam
drops her mascara into her bag and applies a layer of lipstick. “Guess so. I’m not waking up early, even for good gossip. This face needs its beauty sleep.”
I mouth the words “hang over” to Jo and she smiles.
Sam
ignores both of us. I squeeze both their hands. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Okay. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do,”
Sam
says. “But feel free to confirm the status of his ass.”
I snort and walk out the bathroom door.
I knock on Alex’s cabin door
,
and he swings it open like he’s been expecting me.
“Are you in trouble?” he asks before I can even settle myself on the edge of his bed.
“No. Not really. She doesn’t want me spending time with you in front of the campers.”
He releases a breath and pulls his hand through his hair. “Oh. Well. I guess that’s not that big of a deal.”
“Yes, it is. It sucks. I should be able to hang out with whoever I want.”
Alex sits down beside me. “You’re not a camper anymore, Kay-Kay. Those girls look up to you. And they’re young. Irene’s right. Seeing you with me isn’t the best
example
for them.”
I dangle my legs off the edge of the bed. “I don’t get why it’s that big of a deal. Is it because of the older thing?”
“No. Not for them. They probably think we’re both ol
d. But it is because of the man-
woman thing.”
My bottom lip sticks out. Alex laughs and traces it with his thumb. My breath gets caught in the back of my throat. He looks at me and it’s like he can see every thought that is racing through my brain and not one of them is even remotely clean.
He sits back against the wall at the head of his bed. “So is that all Irene had to say?”
It takes a second for me to get my bearings back and when I finally do, Alex’s gaze is zeroed in on my mouth. I lick my lips and it’s like we can both hear the crackle of energy in the room.
I cough. “Yeah. Pretty much. She also suggested this summer might not be the best one for you to make any new ‘friends’.”
He flinches and then all
the
emotion leaves his face like a curtain sh
utting at the end of a show. “O
h. She’s probably right.”
I inch closer. “Why would she say that?”
Alex’s gaze darts around the room. He stands and crosses to the map of Wisconsin he has pinned on one of his walls. “I don’t know,” he says with his back to me. “Irene’s old. Who can say what makes her tick?”
And this is the shut down. I’ve gotten so used to it that it almost doesn’t hurt anymore. “So that’s how it’s gonna be? Okay
,
then. I’m gonna take off. I’ll see you. Maybe.”
I’m two feet from the door when he calls me back. “Don’t go, Kay-Kay. I don’t want you to go.”
I turn back around. “Are you gonna tell me why she said that?”
He sh
akes his head. “It’s a long story
. And really not something I want to talk about. But I still want you to stay.”
I drop my hands to my hips. “I gotta tell you, I’m not exactly buying you as a great friend at this moment. I mean really, you should be able to tell your friends anything. And Christ knows I’m not gonna judge you for anything. I’m the last person to be throwing stones. But for this to be real. For us to be real, you’re gonna have to let me in.”
“You’re nineteen, Kay-Kay. Even if you could understand, why should you have to?”
“Because, Alex, I’m your fucking friend and maybe I want to understand.”
“Please,” he says and I feel like his voice is about to crack. “Please. Stay. Tonight. Come talk to me about stupid things and make me laugh and be Kay-Kay. I’ll tell you all the hard stuff later. But not tonight. Not now. Please. Be the Kay-Kay I need.”