“How do you do that?” Kallista gasped as Torchay pulled her leg higher over his hip, opening her wider. “How do you send me magic when I don't call it?"
“Don't know exactly. It works?"
The men began to thrust in unison, leaving Kallista unable to reply. She grasped the magic she'd been given and sent it rippling between them.
It was awkward, almost uncomfortable to have both of them shoving inside her at once, and it was so erotic it made her tremble. She let the magic go, unable to hold it, much less control it. The sensations bleeding through the link were not the magic. She could feel what they felt, sense how every slide of flesh against flesh against flesh aroused each of them. Intense. Outrageous. Uncontrollable.
She grabbed for the magic in a too-late bid to hold out longer, and kicked them all into cascading, screaming climax.
Eons passed before she could move again, or perhaps just a moment. Kallista rolled to her back and hooked an arm around each man's neck, drawing them in until their faces touched hers.
“I love you.” She kissed Torchay. “And I love you.” She kissed Obed. “Please don't force me to choose. I can't. I couldn't bear to lose either one of you, and I know our other iliasti feel the same."
“We couldn't bear to lose you either.” Torchay kissed her cheek. “And I've been thinking."
Kallista gave him a wary look. “That sounds ominous."
“It's not. At least I don't think so.” He sat up and folded his legs. “I want you to teach Obed how to go to the dreamscape and back. If something happens and you get trapped there again, I don't like being the only one who can follow. It would be better if you could teach all of us to do it."
“Now?” She could feel weariness eating away her strength.
“Obed now, yes. I—I'm afraid to wait. Now we've got Sky back and the drugged swords failed to take any more godmarked from you, the demons could be desperate enough to attack directly. I don't want you dreaming without at least two of us able to come after you."
He was right. And two of them could help each other if need be. “Go fetch Jondi,” she said. “Or whoever's on duty. Tell him what we're doing, to watch without interfering unless the sun rises and we still haven't woken. Then he's to fetch the godmarked and Gweric. When you've done that, come back and lie down.” Kallista patted the empty pillow beside her.
Torchay eyed her with suspicion. “I can watch."
“You're coming with us. You need the practice.” Kallista looked at Obed as Torchay padded naked to the door. “We didn't ask whether you wanted to learn this, did we?"
“Whatever you ask, you know I will do it, if I can.” He smiled as he brought her hand up to kiss her fingers. “And I agree. I should know how to do this. I want to know.” A shadow crossed his face. “But I fear I will not be able to learn."
“You will. It doesn't require magic, and our link will make it easier."
Leaving the night guard just inside the door, Torchay returned and stretched out next to Kallista, drawing the bedcover to his neck. She found his hand beneath it and twined her fingers with his, her other hand still clasped in Obed's.
“Listen to your heartbeat.” She closed her eyes. “Feel your breath whisper in and out of your chest, your blood pulse through each part of your body. Sense each part of your physical self. Know it. Accept it. Love it."
Kallista sank deeper into her own body, sensing her men settle solid into theirs. “This is home,” she said. “Where you belong. It will be here waiting for you when you return. Now that you have anchored yourself, you can let go. Body and spirit are one whole, but spirit can leave for a short time without harm. Listen to my heartbeat now, and step out."
She wanted to help them, to take that step with them, for them, but they had to be able to do it on their own. So she sat in the dreamscape, watching anxiously.
After a moment, Torchay exhaled and bobbed up into the dreamfog beside her, a cork rising to the surface. “That was easier than last time.” He looked around curiously. “Is it always like this?"
“When you've got yourself properly anchored, yes.” Kallista watched Obed struggle. “Don't wander off."
Torchay gave her a sour look. “What sort of bodyguard do you think I am?"
Kallista ignored him, satisfied he would stay close, and focused her attention on Obed. “Relax,” she whispered. “Let go. Gain control by giving it up."
He tensed, then his lips moved as if he repeated some meditation. His body visibly relaxed. Kallista felt a tug on his link, and Obed slipped out of his body and into the dreamscape.
“See?” Kallista hugged him tight. “Not so hard after all. Now, to get yourself back."
“But I just got here.” Obed turned in a circle, staring at the multicolored glows flaring within the gray mist.
“Practice first. Explore later. Back you go.” She swatted Torchay's backside and with a wink, he dove back into his body.
Obed stepped down with more dignity, settling in without trouble. Kallista had them do it twice more, up and back, before she declared them proficient.
“What are the colors?” Obed reached for an azure bubble floating by. It dodged his touch, bobbing higher out of reach.
“I don't know. Other people's dreams?” Kallista shrugged. “My own dreaming is enough to deal with."
“Are we dreaming now?” Torchay had clothed and armed his dreamself, apparently deciding that if he played the part of bodyguard, he ought to look like one.
“Not exactly. When we dream, a smaller part of ourselves comes here.” Kallista surveyed the dreamscape, itching to search it for demons. But she would not drag her magicless iliasti after her. Not in this place.
“What is that?” Obed pointed.
Not far from where they stood, a golden glow speared through the mist, growing in brightness until they had to hide their eyes from its brilliance. When it faded enough to see, the light had become a glowing tendril, groping blindly in the dreamscape as if looking for an anchor. It called to Kallista, and she eased closer. She reached for it, but her hand closed on nothing. The slender thread seemed to dissolve.
“What is it?” Torchay asked this time, staring in wonder.
Kallista started to shake her head, then stopped as the possible answer hit her.
"Hurry!"
She didn't wait for them, flying back to her body. The men scrambled after, stumbling as they followed her out of the bed.
“Wait!” Torchay cried.
"Stop."
She couldn't. Without pausing to grab her houserobe, or anything else, Kallista ran naked through the embassy, her nightguards trotting impassively after her. Her iliasti staggered behind, holding each other up as if they hadn't quite got themselves shoved all the way back down to their feet. “Damn it, Kallista,” Torchay shouted. “What's going on?” Elationbubbledthroughherandshespuninacelebratorycircle,allowing the men to catch up. “I know what we saw. Keldrey's been marked!"
Chapter Twenty-Five
Kallista threw her arms around Torchay and Obed and even the startled bodyguards, hugging them each in turn, before darting away again. She threw open the door to the room where Viyelle slept with Joh and now Keldrey too, snoring in his place nearest the wall. It brought Kallista up short a moment. Wouldn't he have been awake for his marking?
She crawled onto the bed and up his blanket-covered form, not bothering to keep from waking the other two sleepers. “Keldrey,” she crooned. “Darling Kel, kiss me."
“Mmm.” He obeyed before he came fully awake, pursing his lips, bringing up his hand to the back of her head to hold her as he deepened the kiss. The kiss that was just a kiss.
On the verge of tears, her elation crumbled into despair, Kallista struggled to free herself. Jerking out of Keldrey's hold, she swiped her hand across her mouth as she sank back onto her heels.
It couldn't be.
“Hey,” Keldrey protested. “That's not right. To come in here while I'm sleeping all peaceful-like and kiss me and get me all hot and stand-up, and then push me away like that.” He reached for Kallista and she batted his hand away.
Then she reached for it. Maybe she hadn't done it right. “You have to be marked,” she muttered, clasping his hand between both of hers.
"I need you to be marked."
Her agitation growing, she grabbed Keldrey's head and pulled him forward, down, till he almost lay in her lap, searching for the rose-shaped mark on the back of his neck, the one that had to be there. And wasn't.
“Why aren't you marked?” She flew at him in a rage.
Shock held Torchay motionless for too long while Kallista rained openhanded blows down on Keldrey, following as he tried to retreat. This wasn't like her. Surely even delayed grief couldn't have sent her this far out of control.
She screamed incoherently in her attack. Keldrey shouted at her, telling her to stop. Joh swept Viyelle out of harm's way. Obed caught Kallista's flailing arms and pinned them to her body, but couldn't stop her kicking at Keldrey as he lifted her off the bed. Too late, Torchay came to help, imprisoning her in the houserobe he'd thought to bring, taking her from Obed.
“What in all the seven bloody hells is going on?” Keldrey touched his split lip and frowned at the blood he found.
"Kallista."
Torchay shook her gently. She'd stopped screaming finally, but the weeping didn't reassure him.
“She thought you'd been marked,” Obed said.
“I gathered that.” Keldrey looked at the others in the room. “You okay, Vee?” He crawled from the bed and went to use his bodyguard's healer training to check on her.
“Fine. Never better.” Viyelle turned Keldrey's face to the lamp Joh had lit. “Is your lip the worst of it?"
“You don't understand,” Obed said. “We saw it. The marking. Or we saw something.” He explained what they had been doing and what they had seen while Torchay tried to get Kallista to talk to him, to do anything other than weep. What was wrong with her?
“If it wasn't me being marked, which obviously it wasn't ‘cause I ain't marked, am I? Then what was it?"
“I don't know.” Obed shook his head.
“Kallista? Look at me, love.” Torchay tipped her face up, lifted her eyelids. “Help us out here. What did we see?"
She shook her head, tears still flowing, silently, uncontrollably. “I need him to be marked, Torchay."
“I know.” He tucked her head against his shoulder, holding her close, and gave Keldrey a helpless look. Torchay didn't know what to do for her. Maybe the other man did.
“What if...” Joh began and all eyes turned his way. He didn't finish. He was watching Kallista. “I have a thought,” he said. “But I don't think our ilias will like it."
Kallista pushed out of Torchay's embrace and turned on Joh, eyes blazing. “What?” she demanded, shoving her arms into the sleeves of her robe. “What is your thought? What won't I like?"
“Kallista—” Torchay caught her arm and she threw him off. This wasn't what he'd had in mind when he asked for a response. Her whiplash moods worried him.
"Kallista."
Keldrey stepped between her and Joh.
“Oh for—” She rolled her eyes. “I'm not going to hurt him."
“You'll excuse us if we don't exactly trust your word right now.” Keldrey pushed his swollen lip out farther.
“Fine.” She backed up, then her eyes filled with sudden tears that spilled over as she looked at their oldest ilias. “I'm sorry,” she whispered. “I'm so sorry, Kel."
“I'vehadworse.Doubtlesswillagain."Keldreypulledherintoaforgiving hug, then kept his arms around her as he nodded to Joh. “Tell us."
Joh cleared his throat. “What if it
was
a godmarking you saw? What if someone other than Keldrey was marked?"
“What? No!” Kallista began to struggle in Keldrey's grip. “
No
. Keldrey's ilias. He's one of us. I won't have a stranger in Stone's place!"
Oh Goddess, not this.
Torchay's heart broke for her, for all of them. Hadn't they endured enough pain?
Kallista fought so hard, Torchay feared she would hurt herself, but Keldrey's hold never slipped. It never would.
“Take her back to our room,” Torchay felt thick-headed. His worry for Kallista made it impossible to think, not good for a bodyguard.
“I'll get the poppy syrup. Perhaps if she sleeps—"
“Perhaps we should search,” Fox said. “In case Joh's thought is correct. Or in case it is not. You saw
something
in the dream world. Perhaps we should try to find it."
“Search the embassy,” Obed said. “What we saw was close."
“I'll get it started.” Fox tied a scarf over his eyes. He had kept the delicate strip of red silk with him since the arena, tied round his upper arm when it wasn't over his new-seeing eyes. He claimed it helped him focus his
knowing.
The three in the doorway backed up to let Keldrey through with his struggling burden. Torchay ran to collect the medicine from his room, then caught up with Kallista as Kel crashed over onto the mattress with her. Obed had to pry open her mouth while Keldrey pinned her down and Torchay poured the syrup down her throat. Keldrey held on until the drug did its work and soothed her into sodden sleep.
Most of the tension leaked out of Torchay when Kallista finally stilled. The problem remained to be dealt with later, but for now, she could rest. Perhaps the sleep would help her accept the situation, whatever it might be.
"Goddess,"
Obed groaned.
That brought Torchay's head up to meet his ilias's gaze across the bed. Torchay nodded. Thank the One Kallista had taught them both dreamwalking in time.
With a sigh, Torchay turned to Keldrey who was sitting on the bed next to Kallista, brushing back her hair with his fingertips. “Good,” Torchay said. “I don't think we should leave her alone. She always does better with someone beside her, touching her."
“You want
me
to stay?” Keldrey sounded surprised.
Torchay considered, his shoulders shifting in discomfort. “Aye, I do. You need to be here when she wakes. She needs to handle it, you not being marked."
Kel had as much medical training as he did. Torchay didn't have to stay. She didn't need both of them. He stretched his shoulders again. “I can't settle. I can't—I need to move.
Do
something. Find out what happened.” He looked at Keldrey, his burly arm draped across Kallista's waist. “Obed, are you staying?"