Zombie CSU (5 page)
Z
OMBIE
CSU
So, now that we know the basic nature of the beast, let’s go deeper into the science to understand the
why
of zombies, and the
how
of stopping them. In each of the following chapters we’ll get into the nuts and bolts of how forensics, science, law enforcement, and the law operate. Each chapter is broken into:
Just the Facts:
These sections present the hard science from the real world, and here we’ll explore the different aspects of forensics (fingerprinting, blood spatter, gunshot residue, etc.); learn how modern police operate; probe the intricacies of medical science; discuss guns and ammo; report on how the press covers a story; and take a hard look at the law.- Expert Witness:
This is where the experts speak out about their fields of study and their insights. I have a great collection of world-class experts in every field related to crime and punishment. - The Zombie Factor:
And here we ask my experts to play “what if” and apply their years of experience and insights into how science and the law would react and respond to a zombie uprising. - The Final Verdict:
A brief recap of the facts, evidence, and decision based on what they have told us.
Buckle up…it’s about to get a little weird.
Investigating an Alleged Zombie Attack
Confronting the Undead
by Kevin Breaux
I
n police parlance a “Murder Book” is a three-ring binder in which all the pertinent facts of a case are kept. This book, also called a case file, includes autopsy and forensic reports, crime scene photographs and sketches, transcripts of investigators’ notes, and logs of witness interviews. The Murder Book starts as soon as police begin investigating a homicide and concludes with the arrest of a suspect.
Let’s start building our Zombie Murder Book together…
J
UST THE
F
ACTS
The Scene of the Crime
To understand how police handle a crime, we’ll use the following scenario, which will help us set time, place, and other details necessary to create a platform on which the police will build their case. For the most part, and especially in the early stages, the police procedures will be the same for any kind of serious crime (even those that
don’t
involve the living dead).
Zombie Attack Scenario
Time:
Early evening on a weeknight.
Location:
A medical research center in the suburbs of a large city. A two-lane blacktop road runs past the truck delivery gate of the research center. The research center has a chain-link fence, an electric gate, and a small guardhouse. The lot is big, with delivery trucks of various sizes parked and locked. The building is locked and dark, closed for the evening. Several light poles cast some light, but large portions of the parking lot are in shadows.Traffic on the road is infrequent.
Witness:
Sheila Wilson, 49, a new accounts manager for a local branch of a regional banking chain. Ms. Wilson drives a 2006 Ford Explorer and receives a cell phone call from a realtor. She pulls to the side of the road opposite the research center fence in order to write down some information. She hears something that sounds like firecrackers and then turns to witness what she believes is a violent attack inside the fence. One man falls, and a second staggers off, apparently injured, crosses the road, and vanishes into the woods across from the research center. Ms. Wilson disconnects her call and dials 911.
J
UST THE
F
ACTS
The 911 Call
The transcript that follows is from a 911 call received by Romero Township Emergency Services at 7:16
A.M
. on Wednesday in late August.
DISPATCHER
: 911, state your emergency.
CALLER
: Oh my God, I just saw this man come out of nowhere and attack someone. He looks like he’s hurt. I think he’s dead. God! Please hurry. Okay? This man just came out of nowhere and attacked him!
DISPATCHER
: Slow down, ma’am. Tell me your location.
CALLER
: I was just driving home—
DISPATCHER
: What town are you in?
CALLER
: Um…Hinzman, I think.
DISPATCHER
: Are you in Romero Township?
CALLER
: Yes. In Hinzman. On Argento Road, near Liberty Street. You need to
(inaudible).
DISPATCHER
: Is this a private residence?
CALLER
: No, it’s that big research center on Argento Road. The one by the canal.
DISPATCHER
: Can you see a sign?
CALLER
: Um…yes, Martin Medical Research.
DISPATCHER
: Please remain calm, I have police and an ambulance already on the way.
CALLER
: Hurry, please! He had a gun—
DISPATCHER
: Tell me what happened. Has anyone harmed you?
CALLER
: No, not me—the guard. I think I heard a shot? Maybe a couple of them. And then this man came staggering across the—
DISPATCHER
: I need you to try and calm down, ma’am. I need you to tell me what happened.
CALLER
: He’s just lying there on the ground. I really think he’s dead. Or
(inaudible)
.
DISPATCHER
: I didn’t hear what you said. Your cell phone’s cutting out.
CALLER
: The guard’s just lying there. I can see a lot of blood. I can’t tell if he was shot. Oh my god! What should I do?
DISPATCHER
: Ma’am, are you hurt?
CALLER
: No, I just pulled over to make a cell call and I saw—
DISPATCHER
: Are you in any immediate danger?
CALLER
: No, I’m still in my car.
DISPATCHER
: Did you see a gun? Did you see anyone fire a gun?
CALLER
: N-no…but I heard some sounds. Like pops. It didn’t sound like a gun, not like on TV.
DISPATCHER
: Do you see the person who attacked him?
CALLER
: No…he ran away.
DISPATCHER
: He’s not anywhere around your vehicle?
CALLER
: No…I don’t think so. He went the other way. Into the woods. Is the ambulance coming?
DISPATCHER
: Can you tell me what he looked like? Was he white or black—
CALLER
: Um, he was white. Really pale, with dark hair. Short hair.
DISPATCHER
: What was he wearing?
CALLER
: I don’t know. Maybe a T-shirt and light pants. Like doctor’s pants. Scrubs, like that. He was barefoot, too.
DISPATCHER
: Was he alone? Was there anyone else?
CALLER
: No, he was alone…just him and the guard. That poor man—
DISPATCHER
: Ma’am, is the assailant anywhere in sight?
CALLER
: No…he went across the street into the woods. I can’t see him at all. I think he ran away.
DISPATCHER
: Ma’am I want you to get out of your car and go over to the guard. Can you do that for me?
CALLER
: Okay…I’m with him. He’s really bad. There’s so much blood.
DISPATCHER
: Now listen closely, and I’m going to tell you what to do—
At this point a lot of things have happened. As the dispatcher takes the information from the witness, she’s doing several things at once. The questions she asked gave her a snapshot of the events and the location of the crime. She has a physical description and an idea of the direction in which the suspect fled. While talking to the witness, the dispatcher would be typing the information into her computer and requests would be sent to patrol units and emergency medical teams. Often they’ll arrive while the 911 call is still in progress.
The next thing she did was to assess whether the scene was safe—relatively speaking—for the responding officers and EMTs. This will determine how those professionals perform upon arrival.
While these units are rolling, the dispatcher may also have the witness go to the victim to assess his apparent condition.
Expert Witness
Fredericka Lawrence, a 911 operator for Bucks County, Pennsylvania, says, “We talk the witness through an assessment. We ask about the types and locations of the injuries, and whether they’re actively bleeding. We ask them if the victim is conscious and responsive. If they are not immediately responsive, we ask them to try painful stimuli, which means they pinch the back of the upper arm. If the victim is conscious on any level, they’ll react to that. Sometimes the witness is asked to provide first aid. For a badly bleeding wound, we’ll ask them to apply direct pressure with a clean cloth; and I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve talked a witness through CPR. Sometimes the witness is a real lifesaver.”
“When calling 911, it’s essential that you cooperate with the dispatcher,” insists Cass Brennan, who worked dispatch in three different Ohio counties in the 1980s and 1990s. “That means that you should be as calm as possible and listen to their questions and provide the best answers you can. Don’t argue, and don’t make a fuss if they insist that you answer their questions, even if it means having to repeat information. 911 operators are trained to ask very specific questions and to keep the caller as calm as possible. They also want to keep witnesses in place so they don’t leave, don’t panic, and don’t compromise the crime scene.”
The operator enters all the pertinent information into the computer so that a permanent and easily accessible record of the incident is always available. All 911 calls are recorded, and every call is given an incident number. It’s useful to ask for the incident number in case you lose your connection or have to call back for any reason. The dispatcher will generally not offer this number but will provide it when asked. Tapes and/or transcripts of 911 calls are available on request—they’re not confidential and are a matter of public record. If you’re involved in an incident, you can request a copy of the tape. If you’ve witnessed a zombie attack, then that tape will probably get you on
Larry King
(but it is illegal to try and sell it on eBay).
Zombies…Fast or Slow? Part 1
Few topics are debated quite as heatedly as that of the speed of the living dead. Romero had them move slow, and for most fans of the genre that is tantamount to the word of God. Upstart directors like Dan O’Bannon (
Return of the Living Dead
) and Zack Snyder (
Dawn of the Dead
) like their zombies to be more fleet-footed. I polled some key players in the world of zombie pop culture to see where they stand:
- “Sssslllloooowwww!”—Max Brooks, author of
World War Z - “For me, slow…. although I was pleasantly surprised by the
- Dawn of the Dead
remake and its Olympic sprinters. But I like slow ghouls—they seem a little more elegant and there’s a nice sense of inevitability in them catching up with the living. No matter how fast you run away, Death will always get you. Eventually.”—Jamie Russell, author of
Book of the Dead: The Complete History of Zombie Cinema
(FAB Press). - “I think slow zombies are scary as hell en masse, but I wanted the zombies in the remake to be scary individually as well. The first thing I wrote in the movie was the first sequence in the movie—that of Ana’s husband being attacked by the little girl, Vivian (which was actually the name of the little girl who lived next door to me at the time). Maybe I made her fast, because a slow little zombie girl in the morning light just didn’t seem as scary. Whatever, I liked the idea of her jumping up and racing down the hall.”—James Gunn, screenwriter for the remake of
Dawn of the Dead
: - “As a veritable disciple of Romero, the slow is the way to go. The idea of smashing slow zombies with a bat still appeals to me. However, I do believe there is a place for the fast zombie. Very intense and very frightening, the speed and relentlessness is very scary.
28 Weeks Later
illustrated that with perfection in the opening scene on the British countryside, when the protagonist was running from the hideout and the creatures were close to cutting him off from the hills at the angle they were taking. Very scary.”—Bowie Ibarra, author of
Down the Road: A Zombie Horror Story
and
Down the Road: On the Last Day
(both from Permuted Press).