Her face appeared ready to crumple, and she turned away, glancing over her shoulder as if to make sure no one was in the doorway lurking about before she turned to face him once more. “It’s too hard for me to go, Hunter. I can’t do it and I’m sorry. I don’t mean to disappoint you, but I just…” Her voice trailed off, and she stood, looking ready to run. “I can’t,” she whispered before she darted toward the door.
He leapt from his chair and ran after her, stopping her just before his office door with a firm hold around her upper arm. Sticking his head round the door, he caught sight of Gloria as she looked up, her questioning gaze meeting his. Smiling at her, he slowly shut the door.
And turned to face the most impossible woman he’d ever met.
“Running away isn’t going to solve this, Gracie.”
She pressed herself against the wall and appeared to be holding her breath before she let it out in a shaky exhale. “I’m not running away.”
“Bullshit.”
She glared. “Isn’t this hard for you? All of this pretending? Carrying on like nothing is wrong, like we’re just co-workers and nothing else? Or is your heart made of steel and you’re already over what happened between us?”
That did it. She was the one who moved through life encased in solid steel armor, deflecting everyone and every unwanted emotion that came her way. And she had the gall to accuse him of being the heartless one?
“I can’t even believe you have the nerve to say that to me,” he said, his lips so tight with anger he could barely speak. “You’re the one who shuts down emotionally. You’re the one who constantly pushes me away. You’re the one who asked to keep our relationship strictly professional. So I give you that and you still can’t handle it.”
“Fine. You’re much stronger than me and I’m a big wimp. Is that what you want to hear?” She tossed the words at him and he wondered if she’d come in here looking for a fight.
Perfect. She’d just found one. He’d been walking around in a quiet rage for days.
“I want to hear you tell the truth for once. That’s what I want. Tell me why you can’t go to California with me, Gracie. It’s the event of a lifetime as far as your career goes and now you’re refusing to go. It makes no damn sense. This isn’t like you, you’re stronger than that. I know it. So give me the real reason you’re trying to bail.”
Gracie braced herself against the wall, wishing like crazy she hadn’t gone with her earlier impulse to talk to Hunter.
He appeared livid, his eyes such a dark blue they were almost black, and his entire body radiated tension. Like he was eaten up with anger, but there was more to it, she could tell. Shadows darkened beneath his eyes, his skin wan and haggard, his mouth pulled into an automatic frown. He was upset. Something was eating at him, and she had the distinct feeling she was the source.
She hated that. Had never wanted it to be like this between them, but he made her feel the same. The mere thought of going to California with him again had gnawed at her for days, and she knew she’d never make it. Despite how hard she’d worked on the Worthwhile launch and how badly she wanted to see it through, she knew emotionally it would be trying, to say the least. Who was she fooling, claiming she could deal with Hunter on a work-only basis after what they’d shared?
Herself, that’s who she’d fooled. Well, it hadn’t lasted long.
Waking up that morning filled with resolve, she’d come into work extra early, hoping he’d show up as well. And he had, luckily enough for her. But the moment she slipped into his office, dread swept through her. He looked so incredibly handsome, smelled so good. She’d wanted to run into his arms and beg him never to let her go.
Instead she’d stammered like a ninny and tried to bail on him. He’d become even more infuriated with her. Now he demanded she be truthful.
Yeah, right. It wasn’t that easy.
“I’m not as strong as you think I am.” She kept her voice soft. Her entire body trembled and she braced herself more firmly against the wall. Needed it to support her before she slid to the floor in a crying, shaking mess.
Hunter nodded once, encouraging her to carry on.
Taking a deep breath, she tried her best. “Maybe this isn’t working out so well, Hunter. It might be better if I—” She paused and closed her eyes, desperate to calm her racing heart. “Maybe I should leave Worth.”
The silence that stretched between them was deafening, and she cracked open her eyes. Saw Hunter standing before her, his expression incredulous, his lips parted as if he attempted to speak, but not a sound came out.
“No,” he finally spit out.
She frowned. “What do you mean, ‘no’?”
“You’re not going to leave Worth because of what happened between us. No way.” He shook his head. “I’m not going to be responsible for that.”
“It’s not your fault, it’s mine.”
“Everyone will think I’m responsible.”
“Who’s going to think that? No one knows what happened between us.”
“Right. And when you leave now in the middle of a campaign, they’re all going to think I’m at fault. That I’m the asshole boss who drove his best employee away.”
Warmth suffused her at the compliment and she tried to ignore it. “You’re just saying that.”
“No, I’m not. Worth needs you.
I
need you.” He paused, eyes wide, expression one of shock. She wondered just how much he might need her. “In the marketing department, I mean.”
“I wouldn’t leave before I completed my project,” she whispered. She was fooling herself. He didn’t need her beyond work purposes. She’d been a fling, nothing more, nothing less.
He slipped his hands into his pockets, an air of defeat lingering around him. “You’ve already made up your mind.”
“It’s what’s best.”
“According to who?”
“According to me, Hunter. I have to take care of myself. I’m all I have. You have this—this business that consumes you. It belongs to your family, it’s your heritage, your past and your future all rolled up into one, and I think that’s so wonderful. Truthfully, I’m jealous of it. Of you and what you have with your family, your brothers and Alex’s wife, your niece. Your family surrounds you and supports you. It’s important to you, and it shows.”
A muscle in his jaw ticked, but he didn’t say a word.
“I, on the other hand, have always been alone. Always. My parents abandoned me. No one wanted me, ever. I finally find acceptance here at Worth, and I screwed it up.”
“By screwing me,” he murmured.
It was true. She’d fooled around with him, and look where it got her. “I’m a big girl. I know what’s right and wrong. I made the conscious choice to have sex with you.”
A flare of heat lit his gaze, subtle, but yes, most definitely there. And then it was gone. “At least consider staying with Worth.”
“How?” She shook her head. “I can’t. I just—can’t.”
“I mean maybe you could transfer. Go to another department. Talk to your friend Becky. Since she’s the human resources manager, I’m sure she could help you tremendously.”
She'd never thought of transferring to another department. And she definitely hadn’t thought of tapping into Becky’s brain and seeing what she could come up with. “You think that would work?” she asked cautiously.
“I know I don’t want you to leave. I’d rather give you up to another department within Worth rather than watch you go away forever.”
“I appreciate you saying that.” She tried to smile, but it was tremulous at best.
If she didn’t watch out, she just might break down into tears.
Gracie left work promptly at five, unusual for her considering the last few weeks of nonstop late nights devoted to the launch project. Hunter hadn’t said a word to her when she left beyond a casual good night. It shouldn’t have bothered her, his easy dismissal.
But it did.
Their earlier argument/discussion still rang in her head. She knew he didn’t want to lose her. But was it more work-related than anything else? It had to be. Even if he’d felt a glimmer of something toward her, she’d demolished that with how she constantly pushed him away. No man would stand around and take that sort of treatment, especially one like Hunter. He could have anyone he wanted with a snap of his fingers. And he knew it.
It was what she said to him about having no one that stood out more than anything. She’d always believed she had no one, but was that really true? Were there other family members out there she’d forgotten or didn’t even know existed? Everything had happened when she was so young. And it had all been so terrible she’d immediately blacked out most of it on purpose. Her memories were fuzzy.
She’d never been curious before, too bitter to consider what relatives might be out there still. Today, though, she’d become consumed with it.
The minute she came home, she’d gone to her laptop and opened it up. Brought up Google and typed in her mother’s name and hometown.
Her heart racing, she hit enter and scanned the results. An old arrest mention, her high school looking for her, which was funny considering she hadn’t graduated, and the fourth listing was a link to her obituary.
Gracie clicked on it, waited with held breath while it loaded. The write-up was depressingly meager in details.
Angela Hayes, 24, died Sunday, January 15. She leaves behind a daughter…
Pressing her fingers against her lips to stifle a sob, her eyes filled with tears. They’d mentioned her in her mother’s obituary. How they’d known she existed, she hadn’t a clue. She scanned the rest of the details, read the website header to see exactly what town newspaper it was.
Her mother had died in some tiny town in upstate New York, a place Gracie had never been but her mother had somehow ended up at. Alone and with no family around her and probably no friends either.
She’d heard whispers from past foster parents that her mother had been found in an abandoned house—a drug house. Alone, bruised and dead most likely for well over twenty-four hours, they’d discovered her in one of the bedrooms. Needle marks in her arm and dressed shabbily, her hair a knotted mess. As if she hadn’t bathed in weeks.
A shudder moved through Gracie, and she clicked out of the newspaper site. Her memories of her mother were so vague, and she didn’t even have a photo to remember her by.
Realization hit her, and she stilled. Could her grandma still be alive?
She entered her grandmother’s name. It wasn’t hard to forget it.
Grace Hayes.
She scanned the list of results, saw there wasn’t an obituary mentioned at all. She added their hometown, and the results narrowed. A legal notice of the foreclosure sale of her house two years ago, an award she won at the local garden club for volunteering. Gracie went to a white pages website and entered her grandma’s name and town.
Three phone numbers popped up in the results.
Nerves ate at her, and she tapped her fingers against the edge of the laptop. Should she try and call? Were any of those listed really her grandma? And would her grandma believe it was her? Remember her?
Gracie frowned. Of course, she would remember her. She was named after the woman. But she’d kicked her daughter out of the house when Gracie had been a toddler. And she’d never offered to take Gracie in and raise her.
Maybe she hated her. Maybe she didn’t care.
Deciding now or never, Gracie grabbed her cell phone and punched in the first number with a listing of G Hayes, asking for Grace Hayes when the man answered. He told her she had the wrong number and hung up.
A little shocked at the man’s abrupt disconnect, she tried the next number and came up with no response. Tried the third number, and a woman answered.
“Is—is Grace Hayes available?”
“This is Grace Hayes.”
Gracie’s heart sunk to her toes. The woman sounded older, her voice graveled, as if she’d possibly smoked her entire life. Gracie swallowed, her mouth and throat grew dry and she didn’t know what to say next.
“Can I help you? Who is this?”
“It’s—it’s me. It’s Gracie.”
Dead silence was her answer for long, painful seconds. Gracie’s stomach twisted so hard she was afraid she might throw up.
“Gracie who?” the woman finally asked. She sounded skeptical, not that Gracie could blame her.
“I think.” She sighed loudly. “I think I’m your granddaughter.”
More silence greeted her, this time filled with edgy tension, and Gracie’s finger hovered. Ready to hang up if the woman said something horrendous to her.
“Are you—are you really?”
“Was your daughter’s name Angela Hayes?”
“Yes.” The woman’s voice cracked. “Yes, it was. But she died a long time ago.”
“I know.” Gracie breathed deep. “Angela Hayes was my mother.”
“I always asked what happened to you. I didn’t know. When they found her, they never mentioned you. I looked everywhere until I finally figured you were…dead.” The woman broke down into tears, sobbing into the phone. Gracie’s eyes prickled with moisture. “She left the house so long ago, and she took you with her. I begged her to let you stay, but she refused. I knew she wouldn’t treat you right. But then she disappeared.”