Read Without Sin Online

Authors: Margaret Dickinson

Without Sin (45 page)

‘He’s with the master.’

Letitia found them both in the clerk’s office, arguing with Mr Pearce. ‘The boy is still here,’ she interrupted.

The three men turned to look at her, but it was Jake who asked, ‘Where?’

Letitia shook her head. ‘She won’t tell me.’

‘Waters? You found her?’

Letitia nodded. ‘I’ve locked her in the mangle room.’ She glanced at Isaac. ‘I don’t understand it all, but it’s to do with Miss Finch wanting Meg’s
boy.’ Swiftly she repeated all that Ursula had said, ending, ‘She thought she’d be pleasing you, Isaac.’

Jake waited to hear no more. He was out of the room and into the yard, marshalling a proper search party. Two hours later they had still not found the child.

‘Master, could you persuade Waters to tell you where she’s put him?’

‘I’ll try . . .’ But even Isaac wasn’t hopeful. Waters had, by now, discovered she’d been locked in and was making such a din that she could be heard down in the
yard. She was shouting and screaming incoherently. ‘I don’t think I’ll get much sense out of her.’

‘There must be somewhere we’ve missed.’ Jake turned to the searchers, who were standing about not knowing what to do next.

‘You’d think we’d hear him crying, wouldn’t you?’ one woman said. ‘Poor little mite.’ Several women had tears in their eyes.

Albert came limping across the yard. ‘Jake – I’ve just thought. I bet no one’s thought to look in the dead room.’

All eyes turned towards him as Jake said grimly, ‘No, they haven’t.’ Before anyone else could say a word, he was running across the yard, through into the men’s and
towards the end of the line of buildings. He flung open the door and at once heard the sound of muffled sobbing coming from one of the coffins. He flung back the lid to see the little boy lying
there. He picked him up and held him close, oblivious to the fact that the baby was soaking and smelt terrible.

‘There, there, little man. You’re safe now. We’ll soon have you home with your mammy.’

He stepped out into the yard and everyone surged forward, but it was Letitia who, despite her size, reached Jake first, holding out her arms. ‘Let me have him.’ And as she took him
into her arms, Jake heard her say, ‘Oh, you poor little thing. My precious little boy.’

Tears stung Jake’s eyes. It was what she’d always called him – all his life.

Letitia looked up. ‘Go and tell Meg that he’s safe, but leave him with me. Come back for him in a little while, Jake. He’ll be safe with me, I promise.’

Jake nodded, a lump in his throat. ‘I know that, Matron. Oh, I know that.’

He returned later to find Letitia in her room, cuddling the little boy. A tender smile on his face, Jake watched her bouncing the child on her knee.

‘You used to do that to me,’ he said softly.

Letitia looked up at him, her eyes misty. ‘Fancy you remembering that. You can’t have been very old.’

‘There’s a lot I remember, Matron. All the beatings you saved me from, even though mebbe I deserved them.’

‘Isaac was too hard on you. Harder on you than on anyone else, but maybe that was because . . .’ She avoided meeting his gaze now.

‘Because?’ he prompted, but she pressed her lips together and shook her head. ‘Oh, nothing,’ was all she would say.

Jake sat down opposite and leant forward, smiling at the little boy. ‘He’s a grand little feller, isn’t he?’ The child turned and beamed at Jake. He seemed to have
recovered remarkably quickly from his ordeal and was now gurgling happily. Jake caught his breath. For a fleeting moment, he thought he saw a strange likeness in the child. A likeness to someone he
knew.

‘What’s the master going to do about Waters and this Miss Finch business?’

Letitia looked up at him, seeming suddenly nervous.

‘He ought to report it all to the police,’ Jake went on. ‘What they tried to do must be against the law, mustn’t it?’

‘He will. He’s going to.’ Then suddenly she burst into sobs.

‘What is it? What’s the matter?’

‘Can I trust you, Jake? I mean – really trust you?’ Her eyes were imploring him. Something was causing her great distress.

‘Of course you can,’ he reassured her.

‘You – you won’t make trouble?’

‘Well, it rather depends on what it is. If you’re planning to say nothing about what’s been going on here, then I’m not sure I can give you that promise.’ He put
his head on one side and regarded her thoughtfully. ‘I suppose it has something to do with the Finches, has it? The fact that he’s the chairman of the guardians? You and the master
might lose your jobs if you report his sister?’

She sighed heavily and stroked the little boy’s hair gently. The child leant his head against her bosom and began to suck his thumb. His eyes closed and he slept. His action was so
trusting, so loving almost, that above his head tears now ran down Letitia’s cheeks.

‘Yes, that comes into it, but it’s only part of it. I’ll have to tell you, Jake, even – even if it means I’ll – I’ll be in trouble with Isaac. You see,
my brother’s had a hold over me all these years because – because of something in my past.’ She still held the child close to her, rocking him gently, but her whole attention was
now on the young man sitting in front of her. ‘Oh, Jake, my precious boy, you won’t hate me, will you?’

‘Hate you?’ Jake was puzzled. ‘Why on earth should I do that? I’ve a lot to thank you for.’

Letitia was shaking her head. ‘You mightn’t think so when I’ve finished telling you.’ She paused, as if summoning up the courage, the strength to speak of things
she’d kept hidden for years. ‘A long time ago,’ she began haltingly, ‘I had a baby boy.’

‘Yes,’ Jake said.

She looked up at him, startled. ‘You – you knew?’

‘It was said around the place that that was why you loved all the little boys because you’d had one and lost him.’

She stared at him and then slowly shook her head. ‘Oh, I didn’t lose him, Jake. But, you see, I wasn’t married and my family –’ her tone was suddenly bitter –
‘my loving family wanted me to go away to have the baby and then give it up for adoption. But I wouldn’t. I loved the baby’s father desperately, but – but he came from a
good family and – and he – well – he didn’t want to know.’

It was a familiar, age-old story. Jake touched her arm. ‘Go on.’

She took another deep breath. ‘It happened about the time that Isaac’s wife – left. He said that if I came here and took her place – as matron – so that he could
keep his job, he’d let me have the baby here as long as I never let it be known that the child was mine. So – I went away, had the baby and came back here. Isaac took the child in as an
orphan . . .’ Her voice trailed away and she gazed into Jake’s eyes.

‘And what happened to your boy . . . ?’ Jake began and then realization began to seep into his mind. Pictures from the past came flitting into his mind and, suddenly, he knew.
‘It’s me, isn’t it? I’m – I’m your – your son.’

Letitia nodded and whispered. ‘Don’t hate me, Jake. Please don’t hate me.’

He stared at her for a moment. The revelation was overwhelming and yet he felt no bitterness towards her, certainly not hatred. She’d been given no choice. Like many girls before her and
since, she had got into trouble and had been forced into what she had done.

‘No,’ he said hoarsely and touched her arm. ‘No, I understand. I understand it all. Perhaps – the only thing I could have wished is that you’d told me before now.
Years ago. I’d’ve loved to have known you were my mam.’

Fresh tears flooded down her face. ‘I’m sorry, Jake. Oh, I’m so sorry, but Isaac forbade it and I was so afraid that if I told you he’d have me sent away from here and
I’d never see you again.’

‘I know, I know.’ He put his arm around her shaking shoulders. ‘And don’t worry, he needn’t know you’ve told me now. We’ll keep it our little secret,
eh? Nobody else need know, though I would like to tell Betsy. We – we don’t keep secrets from each other. But she’ll not say a word. I promise you.’

Letitia nodded.

‘Well, well, this is a day for surprises and no mistake,’ he joked, recovering himself a little, though he knew it would take him some time to realize that all these years he had had
a mother and maybe a father too.

He hesitated a moment, but then he had to ask. ‘Don’t tell me if you really don’t want to, but – but who was my father?’

‘I – well – that’s the trouble, you see. I mean, the trouble we’ve got now. What I’m leading up to tell you.’

‘You mean there’s more?’ he teased and clapped his hand to his forehead. ‘I don’t know whether I can take much more in one day.’

But poor Letitia wasn’t smiling. She was looking even more afraid. ‘Your father was – is – Theobald Finch.’

‘Theobald Finch!’ Now Jake was astounded, rendered speechless. Letitia – his mother, as he must now think of her – nodded.

‘Theobald Finch,’ Jake repeated, wonderment in his tone. And then his voice hardened. ‘And he deserted you. Wanted nothing to do with you – or me.’ It was a
statement of fact, not a question, but nevertheless, Letitia whispered, ‘Yes.’

‘But – but why? He had no ties. He wasn’t married . . .’ He paused briefly and then asked, ‘Was he?’

‘It – it was his parents – his father mainly – they were still alive then – and he said it was shaming the family name. He – his father, I mean – even
said how did Theobald know the child was really his.’ Here Letitia hung her head, reliving the shame she had felt then. ‘I was so naive, Jake. So trusting. I loved him so much and
– and I believed he loved me . . .’ Her voice trailed away sadly as she relived her broken dreams.

Jake squeezed her shoulders. ‘I don’t blame you, not for a minute. But couldn’t your family . . . Mr Pendleton . . .’ Not yet could Jake think of the master as his uncle
Isaac. ‘Couldn’t they have done something?’

Letitia shook her head miserably. ‘Mr Finch, Theobald’s father, was the chairman of the guardians in those days and Isaac feared for his job.’

‘I see,’ Jake said grimly. And he did. He understood it all. How a young girl had been seduced and abandoned just because the father of her lover held a position of power in the
town. The same position that Theobald now held and, as Letitia began to speak again, Jake realized with horror that Theobald was now wielding that same power over other people’s lives.

‘I don’t know what to do, Jake,’ she began. ‘Waters told me that Clara Finch wants to adopt Meg’s boy. Has done ever since he was a baby. When he was born, she
promised Meg everything – money, a house, even the shop – but Meg wouldn’t give up her child.’

Jake stared at her. ‘What on earth does Miss Finch want with the child?’

‘She wants to bring him up as her own. She wants to bring up Percy’s son. In some twisted way she thinks of him as the son she might have had with Percy. She wants him, Jake, and
she’ll stop at nothing to get him.’

‘And Meg? You say she won’t let her have him, even though – even though –’ Jake was unwilling to voice the doubts in his mind, yet Letitia was being honest with
him, he couldn’t be any less so with her – ‘Miss Finch used all sorts of . . . of . . .’

He hunted for the word and Letitia supplied it. ‘Inducements?’

He nodded and then murmured, ‘Well, well, wonders will never cease.’

‘What?’

‘Oh, nothing. I was just wondering why,’ his tone hardened as he added, ‘Meg didn’t accept such a tempting offer.’

Letitia stared at him. To her, the reason was simple enough. ‘She loves her little boy, that’s why not.’

The child, still sleeping against her bosom, stirred and opened his eyes. At once, he beamed up at Jake.

‘Besides,’ Letitia said softly. ‘Just look at him, Jake. He’s no more Percy Rodwell’s child than you are. I’m guessing, of course, but who does he remind you
of?’

Jake stared at the boy, who reached out with chubby arms to be lifted onto Jake’s knee, where he sat smiling up at him. Jake’s gaze roamed over the boy’s face. The fair curling
hair, the bright blue eyes, the wide smile. Even in one so young, it was a reassuring kind of smile – a smile you could trust.

‘My God,’ Jake breathed. ‘He’s the spitting image of him, isn’t he? I knew he reminded me of someone, but I couldn’t think who it was.’

‘It looks as if the rumours were true after all, Jake,’ Letitia murmured.

He looked up and met her gaze. Solemnly he said, ‘He’s Dr Collins’s son, isn’t he?’

Fifty-Three

Meg reached out and took the boy from Jake and into her arms. She held him close and murmured endearments.

‘Ron says Mrs Benedict’s fine,’ Jake reassured her. ‘A few bruises, but angry more than hurt. She’ll not let the matter rest, though, I can tell you, whatever the
Pendletons do or don’t do.’

Meg sighed with relief. ‘I’m glad. She’s been very good to me, but I don’t suppose she wants me back. I was going to have to leave anyway soon. We had a letter from the
new owner’s solicitor. She’s not going to be allowed to have lodgers.’

Jake was grinning. ‘Well, I think you needn’t worry about that any more. The new owner is Theobald Finch, and after what his sister’s been up to I don’t think he’ll
make any more trouble. In fact –’ Jake wrinkled his forehead and added shrewdly – ‘maybe he knew nothing about it. It might’ve been just Clara up to her
tricks.’

‘So – you mean, I can go back to Mrs Benedict’s.’

Jake nodded. ‘Whenever you’re ready. I’ll take you back in the cart.’

But Meg was shaking her head. ‘No, no. I’ll walk. I could do with some fresh air after that awful cell. And as for Robbie –’ She stroked his hair and her eyes softened
– ‘well, to think of him being shut in that – that box.’ She couldn’t bring herself to call it a coffin.

‘He’ll soon forget about it,’ Jake said gently. ‘It’ll soon seem like a bad dream for the little chap. That’s all.’

‘I hope so,’ Meg said fervently. ‘Oh, Jake, I don’t know how to thank you.’ She touched his arm.

Watching them together, Betsy’s heart turned cold. There was a fire in Jake’s eyes when he looked at Meg that Betsy had never seen before. It was never there when he looked at her.
And she could see it too in Meg’s eyes. It was as if they belonged together, as if only a cruel Fate kept them apart. Fate – and her, Betsy thought. If he wasn’t married to her,
then . . .

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