With Every Breath (18 page)

Joe, just from the way she was staring at him the other night at the Sandbar.

Oh, God, she thought, oh, God. She finally made it out onto the sidewalk and stood looking around dazedly. She couldn’t let this happen.

Joe Gallen was hers, she reminded herself. Everybody knew that. Nobody else dared to go near him, no matter how good he looked, except that stupid bitch Flannery Reed. Fair game, that was what Flannery had called him, until Gina had set her straight with what might happen to her little dog if she kept hanging onto him.

Sure, things had gone a little sour, she thought, fighting tears. He’d said he wanted a divorce and she’d started drinking too much, as much to show him that she couldn’t live without him as anything else. But she knew that didn’t matter. She could have other kids. He’d get over it. She was giving him time, and it was working.

He never fought back when she started in on him. He was always late with his money nearly every single month, and she knew that was so she would have to call, so he could talk to her. He loved her. And she loved him. Always. And the sex had been so incredible.

When she’d opened her door last night and had seen him standing there in the rain, she’d thought he had finally come around. She’d planned to make him beg just a very little, but then she would have given in. It had felt so good, that euphoria that had hummed through her at the sight of him. She had never felt anything like it before, not even when he had asked her to marry him.

He’s back. That was what she had thought. But then it turned out that he was only there because of Madeline Brogan. That bitch.

Gina hurried to her car and fumbled with her keys. A few minutes later, she was finally flying north up the boulevard. She ran the red light at the center of the island. No one would ticket her. She was Joe’s wife.

Angus was just coming up over the closest, biggest dune behind Maddie’s house when Gina bulleted over the promontory. She skidded into the puddles in the driveway at 110, breathing hard.

The Pathfinder wasn’t there. Maddie Brogan’s car was. Gina got out, slamming her own car door hard.

Angus came around the deck, watching her warily.

"Where’s Joe?" she demanded.

"Took her. They went away."

Gina ran up onto the deck anyway. She pounded on the door. There was no answer.

And she realized that Angus was right, that they had gone somewhere. Together. She whirled around again. Angus was still standing beside the house.

"Where did they go?"

"They went together."

"I know that, you stupid ass. Where? Did they say where?"

Angus shrugged.

He watched the lady who was Joe’s wife, except Angus wasn’t sure she was anymore because everybody said Joe hated her. She picked up a rock from the driveway and threw it furiously at the windshield of Maddie’s car. A great big spiderweb of cracks flashed across the glass.

"Hey!" Angus yelled. "Don’t you do that! Bad! Bad!"

Gina picked up another rock.

Angus moved faster than he had in a very long time. He ran to her, his big feet shuffling as quickly as he could make them. He caught her from behind with a hand on each arm and lifted her right off her feet without effort.

Gina screamed. "You stupid retard, let me go!" "You’re bad. Don’t hurt Maddie’s car."

She tried to flail her legs to kick him, but he held her far enough in front of him that she couldn’t manage it. He carried her back to her car. He put her down by the passenger door, but he stood in front of her, his big bulk protecting Maddie’s car and everything else behind him.

"When Joe comes back, tell him . . . tell him ..." She was too wild, too anguished to think clearly.

"What?" Angus asked, already concentrating hard so he could remember what she said.

"Tell him if he lays a finger on her, I’ll kill him," she panted. "I’ll take him back to court. I’ll get twice as much money. I can barely live on what he gives me anyway."

Angus nodded seriously. "I’ll tell him."

"Tell him if he touches her, I’ll make his life a living hell," she finished, but she suddenly felt like crying. "Oh, Christ, listen to me. You’re too goddamned stupid to remember any of this. Never mind, I’ll find him and tell him myself."

Actually, Angus kind of agreed that it might be a very bad thing for Joe to touch Maddie. It made his own belly feel sort of sick.

Gina got back in her car and drove off. God, her arms hurt. She lifted one and rolled her shoulder gingerly as she crossed back over the bridge. That stupid retard had really hurt her.

Well, she’d make him pay, too.

Chapter 14

They reached the ferry just as its engines started rumbling. Joe leaned on the horn of the Pathfinder, and Harry Reiter looked up from the stem, where he was throwing off the mooring lines. He held up a hand and went ponderously to reopen the gates at the drive-on ramp.

Maddie glanced into the backseat. Josh was sitting very still, buckled into his seat belt. His eyes weren’t exactly glazed, as they had been last night, but they were too dull for her comfort.

He had been doing so well. She bit back a groan and faced forward again. At least he had woken up. She admitted to herself, since the fear was behind her, that she’d been terrified that she wouldn’t be able to rouse him. The terror had bloomed, stealing her breath when she’d had to shake him once, twice, then three times to get him out of that deep sleep.

Hiding, she thought again. Oh, baby, there’s nowhere left to go.

She realized that was true in a literal sense as well.

They were virtually at the end of the world there. There was nowhere left to run, to hide. But Rick had found them anyway, and Candle Island was turning out to be far from a hospitable place after all.

"I just don’t see why Leslie felt it necessary to tell me all that today," she murmured, almost to herself.

Joe glanced at her, then drove the truck onto the ferry. "She probably had some shrink-type reason."

They parked and got out of the Pathfinder. Josh unbuckled himself at her urging and came to stand close beside her. He dug his fingers into her jeans at her thigh.

"Rough today," Harry said, coming down to greet them. Maddie was relieved that he didn’t stare at her this time. "Lots of chop left over from last night’s storm. Got Dramamine in the pilothouse if you want some." "Thanks," Joe said. "We’ll let you know."

He put a hand to the small of Maddie’s back and urged her toward the rail. She tried not to think about how warm his touch was. And it wasn’t really comforting this time. It seemed to shoot little spasms of sensation out into her skin, even through her coat.

In spite of herself, she thought again of the conversation they’d had that morning. Obsession, she thought. Desperation. Compulsion. And how easily love could slide over into that descent. It had not been an entirely new thought to her. Ever since Rick had shot Ronnie Sanchez, she had known love was dangerous. It could destroy life and turn it upside down.

And it was not just her own life she was concerned with. She had to think of Josh’s peace of mind as well. She didn’t dare get involved again, and yet there she stood, shivering at the touch of a man’s hand at the small of her back. Needing him, if only to believe in her. "What?" Joe asked, feeling her tremor.

Instinctively, self-protectively, Maddie lied. "I was wondering . . . have you talked to Harry about what happened?"

Joe hesitated only briefly. "Yeah. The ferry didn’t run yesterday because of the weather."

"So Rick couldn’t have come over on it."

"Not yesterday." Joe looked down at Josh. Maddie followed his gaze and knew what he was thinking. She was touched all over again.

"I don’t think it’s necessary to keep shielding him," she said quietly. Though josh didn’t appear to be listening, she was pretty sure he was. "He’s a big, strong boy, and the truth can be comforting as well as horrifying. I mean, we’re aware of what’s happening, and we’re fighting it. We’re not just sitting ducks this time. We can fight back. Right, Josh?"

He looked up at her slowly and blankly. She’d already told him that they were going to the mainland to find out if the storm had hurt the kitten, or if maybe somebody else had done it. She knew he was too smart not to pick up on all their tension, so it had seemed best to include him in what they were doing. And if Leslie Mendehlson disagreed, then she could just go to hell, Maddie thought.

Once again, Joe seemed to read her mind.

"I think that’s the line of reasoning Leslie was using when she smacked you upside the head with the truth this morning. I think she thought you’d just be better off knowing. People are sure going to be whispering about it and pointing at you after this."

Maddie nodded grudgingly. "She pointed out that I probably would have heard it somewhere, sooner or later."

"I’d put money on it," Joe agreed. "You get seasick?" The ferry was beginning to pitch and roll a little. In

fact, she did feel a little queasy. "I guess we’ll find out." She looked back up at the pilothouse, where Harry Reiter had disappeared. "Did he have any strangers on board the day before yesterday?"

Again, Joe hesitated. "He says no."

"What about the docks?" she persisted. "I mean, Rick could have rented a boat and come over on his own." She was truly bothered by how he had breached Candle’s natural security. Was she wrong about its being him?

"I’ve got somebody talking to the skippers down there today," Joe replied. "But I called most of the owners and captains first thing this morning. They didn’t notice any strange boats around."

Maddie felt her heart sinking. "And nobody gave him a lift from the mainland?"

"Those boats don’t go
to the mainland. The only one that makes a round-trip is the mail boat."

"And you still believe me?" she cried suddenly. "What are you doing, humoring me?"

He watched her steadily. "I already told you why I believe you."

"Your love theory," she muttered, not entirely appeased. "That’s right."

"Twelve miles is a hell of a long way to swim, even for love, Joe."

"Twelve point eight."

"Don’t play with me," she snapped irritably. Something in his eyes burned suddenly, belying his raised brow. "Lady, I haven’t even started that
yet."

Her heart stalled. It went very, very still as he held her eyes, and she thought wildly, he doesn’t mean what I think he means. But he did. Her heart started moving again hard, and something warm and tight settled low in her belly.

She realized just how dangerous this was.

She thought of the way he had held her this morning. She’d been telling herself that that had just been professional care. That things were different, more relaxed, on Candle Island. But the truth of the matter was that when her ex-husband had stolen her son and had shot a cop, when they had taken her to the station in Fort Lauderdale to reunite her with Josh and tell, her what had happened, not one of those cops had laid a Finger on her. It had been a far more emotionally charged situation than finding a dead cat nailed to her door, even with all the cat’s implications. But not one of those officers had patted her shoulder, caught her arm to steady her, nothing.

She raked a hand through her hair and looked helplessly away from Joe’s steady gaze. Not now. I can’t deal with this now.

As it turned out, she was prone to seasickness. They were halfway across to the mainland when her gorge rose, and Maddie turned to scan the cars and the pilothouse wildly.

"Bathroom’s over there." Joe pointed to a door on the car level, tucked back against the outside wall.

Maddie ran. It was an immediate need, and she did not have the luxury of worrying about how Josh would take her sudden departure. She slammed the bathroom door and got to the toilet just in time.

A few minutes later, when she looked at her reflection in the cracked basin mirror, she almost smiled. Her face was pale, a sickly yellow. This was what Joe Gallen was giving long, steady looks to?

She rinsed her mouth out and—thankfully—found a mint in her purse. She let it melt on her tongue as she left the bathroom, then her stomach fluttered all over again.

Joe and Josh were gone.

She didn’t panic, not exactly. It never once occurred to her to fear for Josh. She would examine that later. She simply knew that Joe would not let harm come to him. Still, it made her nervous for her child to be out of her sight.

She hurried to the railing and looked back, craning her neck up, and her jaw dropped. They were on the landing outside the pilothouse with Harry Reiter, and Josh was sitting on Joe’s shoulders. Her head swam with sympathetic vertigo.

"Be careful!" she called up to them. She worried about how choppy the sea was, about Joe losing his balance.

His big hands were secure around Josh’s ankles. It finally occurred to her that Josh did not look alarmed, although the only man who had gotten even remotely close to him in weeks was softhearted, soft-headed Angus. She hurried up to the pilothouse before she could think of that too much either.

By the time she reached them, Joe had lowered Josh to the deck again. "Better take one of Harry’s pills," he suggested.

Maddie did, even though she could see land by then. The ferry docked in Jonesport, and they went back down to the Pathfinder. Then she realized that they were driving right through the town.

"Where are we going?"

"Ellsworth. It’s the nearest, largest city. Technically, it’s in Hancock County, but we help each other out. I know a guy there who can arrange for what we need done."

After they dropped the biohazard box at the police station there, Joe hesitated on the sidewalk outside. "I probably won’t hear anything, any results, until at least tomorrow."

Maddie nodded. That was more or less what she had expected.

"I want to find a phone and call the island, see if they’ve finished dusting that window yet."

"Okay." He was leading up to something, but she couldn’t figure out what.

"Maybe we could find a bar and grab something to eat, and I could call from there."

"A bar?" she repeated, glancing at Josh.

"We could catch the Pats."

Maddie blinked. "What are pats?"

"The New England Patriots?"

She couldn’t quite tell from his expression if he was dumbfounded or irritated with her. And she still didn’t have a clue as to what he was talking about.

"The football
team, Maddie. It’s Sunday." Everyone knew about football and Sundays. Didn’t they? he thought.

Then he understood. She didn’t know that he had played ball, and for all the unwanted attention that had brought him over recent years, he suddenly found himself disgruntled.

"I used to play," he said finally. "Professionally. I kind of hate to miss a game."

"Oh," Maddie answered. She smiled a little as she remembered thinking that he walked like a jock. Her pictures might be gone, she thought, but her instincts and impressions were still on the money.

"Were you a ... uh, Pat?" she asked.

He began moving up the sidewalk, his limp slight today, almost imperceptible. "No. I played for the Vikings. And that’s who the Pats are playing today. So I’d like to see it. Do you mind? I mean, why not? Is there any law that says we can’t enjoy ourselves a little while we’re hacking through this whole mess?"

He sounded defensive. Maddie felt a sudden, almost-uncontrollable urge to laugh. For all his dark, dangerous toughness, he had a certain look in his eyes just then, when he glanced back over his shoulder at her. He reminded her of a teenager who had just asked someone to the prom, and he was telling himself that he didn’t give a damn if she said yes or no. And she knew it was dangerous, but Maddie heard herself flirting anyway, because he was right. They were in the middle of something nasty, and she needed some release at that moment like she needed air to breathe.

"Joe?" she called out, catching up with him, pulling on Josh’s hand to hurry him along. "Are you sniffing now?"

She was pleased to see him miss half a step, as though his knee suddenly pained him more than usual... or he was startled.

"I’m just offering to buy you lunch," he snapped, "so I can see the goddamned ball game."

Maddie smiled slowly. "Watch your language and lead the way."

"Thought I was."

They found a tavern halfway down the next street. The game was on a television above the bar, as well as on a wide-screen TV at the back of the room. Joe took a table near the wide-screen and leaned forward in his chair to pull a chair out for her as well.

Are you sniffing now?

He wasn’t sure just what he was doing. He only knew what he felt, what he’d been feeling ever since he’d given her one of his theories this morning, and she’d actually nodded in understanding. And since then, he’d felt restless, reckless, a little bit like thumbing his nose at all his better judgment. He felt hot and randy. Ready and alert. Alive.