Nicolina smiled. “I’ll wrap it pretty for you!”
“Thanks,” Ben said and handed her his debit card.
After Nicolina wrapped the bracelet she said, “Enjoy! I hope your lady loves it.”
“I’m sure she will.” After Ben was back in his truck he tucked the gift inside his glove box and locked it. He couldn’t wait to see Kate’s face when he handed her the package. Once he was out on the lake he even missed hooking several fish because all he could do was daydream about Kate and the evening ahead. He finally caught a few nice crappie to fry up that evening and called it an early day.
Later, after cleaning the fish, Ben took special pains with his appearance, shaving closely and then rustling up a bit of gel to put in his hair. He splashed on some aftershave and picked out his nicest pair of khaki shorts. He put on a light blue casual button-down shirt that he hadn’t worn in years and then looked at the white box wrapped with a blue velvet ribbon. His heart thumped in his chest and for a moment he lost his nerve.
But the heart-shaped charm came to mind. “Love hurts but the heart must remain strong,” he whispered. “Not easy.” Ben closed his eyes and swallowed.
Love also heals
.
When those words seemed to float into his head Ben had to smile. A tingle ran down his spine. “Thank you,” Ben whispered.
Ben hadn’t felt the presence of Anna standing next to
him for a long time. The first time it had happened he blamed it on the half bottle of bourbon he’d downed the night after her funeral. She chastised him for going that route and he’d never done it again. When it happened again the logical part of Ben chalked it up to his brain helping him cope with her sudden death. But in the end, whether the visits from his late wife were real or imagined ceased to matter. One way or another Anna found a way to calm him in his weakest hour and he was thankful.
Ben would have thought it was odd that Anna would pick the evening that he was going to profess his love to another woman to make an appearance but that was so like her. She had given him her blessing and that was all that mattered.
Ben closed his eyes again, and for the first time in so very long he pictured Anna with such clarity that it took his breath away.
Go! Hurry. Don’t waste a precious moment.
Love must transcend space and time. Because he loved another didn’t mean he didn’t love her. Anna understood. “Love is bigger, broader, and so much stronger than that.”
A single fat tear slid from the corner of his eye and rolled down his cheek but the turmoil in his heart vanished and he felt a warm rush of peace. Whether coming from the hereafter or from his precious memories, the strength of Anna’s love found a way to reassure and calm him.
Ben picked up the gift from the dresser and smiled. He was finally good and ready. There was no need to look back, only forward, and for the first time since he could remember the future looked bright rather than bleak. Ben felt as if he had started to live his life in color rather than black-and-white and it felt amazing.
After getting the bag of fish fillets out of the fridge he spotted a bottle of Bogle Chardonnay that Kate had come to enjoy. He grabbed it, put everything in a canvas tote, and smiled. The vineyard had become Kate’s favorite and he kept it on hand for her. The thought occurred to him that living under the same roof would make things a whole lot
easier, even though her place was just a short walk away. Still…the notion held appeal.
Ben whistled as he walked through Whisper’s Edge. The sound of dishes clanking and the aroma of food wafted his way, making his stomach rumble in anticipation. He was suddenly very hungry for dinner…and a whole lot more.
K
ATE CRUMBLED THE CRUNCHY TOPPING OVER THE MAC AND
cheese before sliding the glass dish into the oven. After washing a few dishes she sneaked a bite of the coleslaw that was already chilling in the fridge. “Hmmm.” She added more cracked pepper and then tested it again. “There we go.” She nodded with satisfaction, but after she put the slaw away she remembered why she had opened the fridge in the first place. “Whipped butter,” she mumbled with a shake of her head. She wanted the butter to soften for the yeast rolls she’d picked up at Grammar’s Bakery. Of course, she hadn’t gotten out of the bakery before Mabel Grammar talked her into a scrumptious cinnamon cake for breakfast and a dozen of her famous butter tea cookies. All it had taken was a piece of cookie from the plate of broken samples and she’d caved.
Kate looked at the white paper bag containing the melt-in-your-mouth cookies and sighed. She’d eaten three of them on the way home. “Damn that Mabel anyway.” Okay, Mabel hadn’t really talked Kate into any of the purchases but that was her story and she was sticking to it. Luckily,
Ben worked the extra calories off her with evening walks around Whisper’s Edge and down by the river, not to mention the lusty lovemaking sessions that left her breathless and limp as a rag doll. “Whoo-ee.” Kate fanned her face at the mere thought and opened the fridge and stood there just to cool off.
After setting the kitchen table she tossed together some tartar sauce in anticipation of the fish fry. Ben had given her the easy recipe, and it tasted so much fresher than from a jar. Before Ben, cooking had been a mindless chore but it had turned into a labor of love. She bought his favorite things at the grocery store and stocked the fridge with condiments he enjoyed, like the hot sauce that he put on everything. It’s a wonder the man had any stomach lining left. Something as simple as setting the table took on a whole new meaning when it wasn’t just for one. After her divorce, Kate had shut herself off from the world and she suddenly realized what she had been missing.
After a quick peek in the oven at the mac and cheese that was just starting to bubble around the edges, Kate hurried into the bathroom to freshen up. Taking extra pains with her appearance was another change she had made since being with Ben. Kate grinned. Ah, but she’d noticed a difference in Ben too. Nowadays, he wasn’t always dressed like a lumberjack…even though Kate found the look sexy as all get out, but Ben had either gone shopping or dragged clothing out of hiding because he was wearing clothes she’d never seen before. Kate suspected a little bit of both. But the best part was that Ben laughed and actually talked in sentences instead of giving one-word responses. She even saw him playing horseshoes and joking around with the men instead of keeping to himself.
Kate grinned at her reflection in the bathroom mirror. These days she positively glowed. The ship that she’d thought had sailed, as she’d told Savannah, had actually been stored in dry dock and
boy oh boy
was she glad to get back into the water.
Oh, not that Kate wasn’t treading carefully in her budding romance with Ben. She was having the time of her life, and she wasn’t about to ruin what they had by bogging down their relationship with declarations of everlasting love. Light and simple was what Kate wanted. Anything more than that would have her running for the hills, she thought with a lift of her chin. But when Kate’s eyes stared back at her with a hint of
yeah-right-you-want-it-all
, she squashed it.
“Who needs all that heartache and drama?” she grumbled at her reflection. “Not me.” And marriage? Kate shuddered at the very thought of giving up her independence. She refused to acknowledge that it was actually the fear of giving her whole heart that lurked in the shadows of her mind. Nope, she liked things just the way they were. She blotted her lipstick and tossed the tissue in the trash before giving her reflection a firm nod. Wanting more was asking for trouble and very well might push Ben right out the door. After the heartbreak he’d suffered in his life it was pretty unlikely that he would want to get serious. “If it ain’t broke don’t fix it,” Kate said with a firm nod.
Kate tugged on a pair of denim Capri pants and a beaded turquoise tank, checking the wobble of her upper arms while wondering if she should get something with sleeves. But before she could decide she heard the screen door close with a metal bang. “Ben?”
“The one and only.”
Kate grinned. They were to the easy point in their relationship where he came in without knocking if she was expecting him. “I’ll be out in a jiffy,” she called from her bedroom and checked the wobble once more. “Help yourself to a beer.”
“You were reading my mind,” he called back, making her smile again. The ease of their companionship was a soft place to land at the end of the day. Oh, and the incredible passion, at their age, was such an unexpected pleasure that Kate had to shake her head in wonder. She would never have guessed that sex could
ever
be this good. A teeny tiny
part of Kate wondered if Ben had shared the same kind of passion with his late wife, but she’d never ask such a question. Kate also wondered if Ben could ever love her as much as he’d loved Anna, and she supposed that it was another reason she held back. And in an odd twist of where-the-hell-did-that-come-from, a part of Kate didn’t want to diminish the cherished memory of his wife. Wanting the whole heart that had been given to another just felt…somehow wrong.
Kate, of course, had finally told Ben about her failed marriage and Craig’s infidelity. She’d mentioned but not revealed how much pain her miscarriage had caused because it was so very difficult to go down that jagged path of her painful past. After that, they’d left the mention of Anna and Craig alone, preferring to stay in the present.
But the past was there and the scars were deep.
Kate slipped into her sandals and inhaled deeply, clearing those thoughts from her head but reminded herself that this was precisely why they needed to keep things fun and causal. It was better that way.
But not nearly as fulfilling
slid into her brain but she pushed it right back out as she headed for the kitchen.
“Something sure smells good,” Ben said and inhaled a deep breath.
“It’s mac and cheese.”
He turned around and nuzzled Kate’s neck. “Mmm, nope, it’s you.”
“You ole flirt,” she chided but his warm lips caused a hot tingle to slide down her spine.
“Better than being called an old fart.”
“True.” Kate laughed. “So you brought me some fish, did ya?” Kate asked with a smile.
“Yes, and a bottle of your favorite wine,” he added. “I took the liberty of pouring you a glass.”
“You didn’t have to do that,” Kate said, but accepted the glass of Chardonnay. She took a sip and sighed. “You’ve taught me that life is too short to drink the cheap stuff,” she
said and could have bit her tongue. What a stupid thing to say to a widower, she thought, and was about to say so, but Ben laughed.
“I agree. And we need to do some shopping for the wine-tasting night you and Savannah are planning. It will be fun. We could even take a drive up to some of the wineries. There are some pretty good ones. Elk Creek is a pretty long ride from here but they also have skeet shooting and that would be a blast, don’t you think?”
“Sure,” Kate agreed. “Sounds like fun and I could use a day off.”
“I’ll look into it.” Ben’s sexy smile caused a little flutter in her stomach. She sure hoped that feeling never went away.
Then Ben looked at her for a long moment, making Kate’s heart thump against her ribs. She had a feeling he was about to say something substantial, but if he was, he suddenly refrained. She wasn’t sure if she felt relief or disappointment.
Relief
, she told herself firmly and took another sip of the cold wine.
“Do you want to have our drinks out on the back deck while the mac and cheese bakes? It needs a little while longer.”
“Sure,” Ben said, but Kate thought she saw a nervous flash in his eyes.
“Let’s go then,” she said, but swallowed hard. He seemed in a good mood so she didn’t think he had anything bad to tell her, but then again life was weird so who knew? She walked out onto the deck and was about to sit down when she spotted a lovely wrapped gift sitting on the round table. Her heart hammered and she turned around to face Ben. “For me?”
“Yes,” he said softly.
Kate swallowed and put her wine down before her shaking hands gave away her sudden emotion. “This is a surprise,” she said gruffly. “Is it an occasion I’ve forgotten? I’m bad that way,” she joked even though she really wasn’t.
Ben reached over and covered his big hand with hers. “No, I just wanted to get you a little something. No holiday, no special occasion, unless you count spending the evening with you. And I do.”
“Oh…” She gave him a smile that wobbled a bit at the corners. Judging by the box, whatever was inside was going to be…something wonderful. Her heart hammered but then she suddenly remembered that the last unexpected gift she’d gotten from a man was an engagement ring. While the size of the box indicated something different in Kate’s suddenly blown mind, it represented the same thing. Commitment. Declaration of feelings. Hope.
And then betrayal.
“Are you going to open it?” he asked gently.
“You really shouldn’t have…”
“I wanted to, Kate. Go ahead. Open it up.”
Kate nodded, but as she reached for the box she was suddenly overwhelmed. She felt hot, then cold and shaky. Dear God, like a panic attack.
“Kate, are you okay?”
“I…” Instead of picking up the box she turned on her heel and all but ran back inside her house.
“Kate!” Ben quickly followed but she kept on walking. Where she was going she didn’t even know but aimlessly ended up in the corner of her bedroom. “What’s wrong?”
Kate didn’t turn around, but figured from the sound of his voice he was standing in the doorway as if uncertain whether to enter. She didn’t blame him. This was stupid! Unfair to Ben! She needed to get under control but just couldn’t.
Ben remained silent and all that could be heard in the room was the sound of her ragged breathing. After another few moments he asked, “Kate?” His voice sounded gruff, confused and hurt. He didn’t deserve this.
She turned slowly and absolutely hated the look of sorrow etched on his handsome features. “Yes?” she whispered.