Vampire Mistress (45 page)

“No.” She shook her head vehemently. “There must be something else—”

He placed fingers against her lips. “Because you have made him your servant, things are more complicated. As long as he stays your servant . . .”

“I’m his only hope of survival.”

“You may be his only salvation, in more ways than one.” Threading his hand in her hair, he massaged her scalp as she turned her head into the caress, seeking it like a worried cat. “I haven’t told you this to put more pressure on you, Anwyn, but I know what kind of woman you are. If you will not fight for yourself, I know you will fight for another, with everything you have.”

“You knew that about him, too, when you planted the seed about being a servant.” She put her hand over his, her eyes searching his face in the semidarkness. Searching for truth from this complicated creature.

“I think you and he are well suited as vampire and servant, and I want what is best for you.”

“Daegan, why are you leaving?”

He shifted, meeting her eyes with unflinching intensity. “The truth is, you need me to serve as your sire and champion now, more than you need me as a lover. While you claim to have accepted it wasn’t my fault, you aren’t certain you’ll ever be able to fully trust or open your heart to me, because of how it happened. Because of what we were before it happened. And what we were not. Am I wrong?”

She wanted to deny it, but he could see in her mind, couldn’t he? Of course, he’d said he wouldn’t do that unless it was necessary. Either way, she couldn’t deny it, though it made her throat ache, the inscrutable eyes that she sensed held so much of his own feelings about it. Five years . . . the deepest, most incredible relationship she’d ever had. Desperation gripped her, something slipping out of reach.

But then she focused on that smooth voice, and realized it was like a sealed Pandora’s box, exploding with the pressure of so many secrets, but suspiciously well contained. Following her intuition, she really noticed the way his gaze dwelled on her face, how still the powerful body was. It was as if he had a leashed need that was quivering like a dog motionless at the end of a leash—while he put enough pressure on the collar to choke himself, straining for what he most wanted.

She thought again of the things they’d shared, small and large, like watching
The Big Easy
on a wide green park lawn under a star-filled sky. Their truth was in those small things. A few moments ago, he’d lightly touched her throat. When they slept together, he would do that, lay the pads of his fingers on her pulse, a constant provocative presence that followed her into dreams.

Yes, he was going to leave her. She could tell there was no way to change that right now. He did have the responsibility to the Council, but more than that, maybe he was right. Maybe she needed the space to think. But now she thought she knew what Gideon would have said to her, earlier, if she’d given him an opening.

Daegan might be leaving. But she damn sure needed to make sure it wasn’t good-bye.

“So selfless.” Standing slowly, watching the way his eyes followed her up, she trailed her fingers along his knee, a slow provocation that drew his gaze back down to her touch. “
A vampire takes what she wants.
That’s what you told me when you made me mark Gideon. But you haven’t done that. You’ve always wanted me willing, but when I thought I was ready, all those months ago, you changed your mind. Withdrew the offer. Never explained why.”

Her fingers drifted across to the other thigh, narrowly missing the pleasurable curve of testicles that stretched the denim. “Trust isn’t all or nothing, remember? It’s a matter of degrees. I think I’m right. I think I do know more about you than I ever let myself realize, Daegan Rei. I don’t think you’ll ever let me go, no more than you let me go when you disappeared those six months.”

She leaned forward, knowing the robe gaped open, revealed the deep cleft between her breasts. It also cleverly parted along the knee, showing a silky length of thigh.

His gaze covered all those areas, then rose to her face. “Come back down here.”

Her lip curved, a sensual taunt whose impact she knew well. His gaze went even more opaque. “I’m yours, right? I expect you could make me do whatever you want.”

He executed that quick movement she could never follow, like the part in a movie where the vampire came out of the shadows, up against his victim’s back before she even knew he was there. So frightening on the screen, so thrilling when it was him. He’d stayed in the chair, but his arms were banded around her waist, pulling her forward into him so her knees pressed into the seat between his splayed thighs. He pulled her down low enough to clasp her hips and fasten his mouth on her collarbone, pricking her sharply. As she gasped, he nudged her head to the side, giving him better access. Her body tightened at the sensual caress, grew heavier as he sipped at her skin, with a restrained fervency that almost overwhelmed her, the controlled ferocity to it.

Her nipples tightened where they rubbed high on his chest. She wanted his mouth to move down her sternum, to suckle each of them. He loved suckling her nipples, nursing her to climax.

Soon,
cher
. You tease me, you pay the price.

Taking advantage of my mind now?
And yet she saw the clear advantage of it, the way she’d so quickly discovered it with Gideon. She couldn’t blame him for embracing the temptation of it.

He dropped his hands to grip her ass, kneading under the thin satin, the silky friction waking erogenous zones all through her sensitive buttocks. His touch was rough, impatient, as if he was afraid of slowing down and becoming tender. That was all right.

I feel you, Daegan. I know you’re in there, deep inside. You can fuck me like a whore, and I’ll still cherish every touch, every demand, knowing how much you want me. You’ll come back to me, because you’re as much a part of us as we are of you.

He cursed, pulled her forward, his hard thigh between her legs, and now she dropped lower, rubbing her pussy against the denim, giving herself relief despite his warning growl.

“What do you want, Daegan?” she whispered. “Tell me.”

In the midst of such demand, his hesitation was unexpected. She tossed back her loose hair, and lifted his strong face to her. For once, he allowed her to see emotion in his gaze, and it took her breath, her heart.

“I don’t want to take you back into that alley,
cher
. I would never want . . . If I could kill them all over again for you, I would.”

“Stop,” she said with desperation. “You could never be like them, no matter what I’ve thought in anger. Don’t bring them into this.”

His jaw flexed. “Then I want you on your knees. I want you to take me into your mouth. I need you to remember that you submit to me, even if you submit to no other. Because it will tell me that you trust me to keep you safe, no matter when or where. That you can obey me instantly, even when you might not understand why I tell you to do something. And that there will be no barriers between us. Not anymore. Whether I have your heart and soul or not, I am in your mind now, and I’m going to require that you trust me to be there, whenever I feel it necessary. Whenever I want to bring you to climax with the stroke of my voice in your head. Whenever I need to be as close to you as you wish to be to me.”

The words rolled through her, erotic, powerful and heartfelt.
No barriers.

The ruthless set to his mouth was as overwhelming to her as a lover’s passionate declaration. Sliding off his thigh intentionally slowly, letting him feel the damp softness of her pussy there, she folded her legs and sank to the floor between his spread knees. His eyes were heat on her skin as she opened the jeans and freed him, sliding her hands with reverence up the impressive length and breadth of him. The beautiful broad head was already damp for her. Rising up onto her knees, she put her mouth on him. Her whole body shuddered as he wrapped his fingers in her hair and took control of her motion, taking her down upon him.

“Suck me,” he demanded. And he didn’t complicate it with the emotions they still had unresolved between them. His declaration that she belonged to him gave her no promises of his heart or soul, either; she knew that. But it meant she had his protection, his dedication to her well-being. They were so close to what they both might want, it was hard to give voice to it. But like that night so long ago when he’d come back to her after six months, he didn’t let her pour out her heart now, wouldn’t give her anything to regret.

“Give me your body, if you can give nothing else,” he said, echoing her thoughts. “Give me everything you can,
cher
. I will take care of what you cannot give.”

He only let her take him down to the root several times before he pulled her up, made her straddle his hips and brought her down on him again. She gasped at his power and size, overwhelmed by how quickly he could bring her to climax with him, how he took command of her senses, knew her body. Granting her wish at last, he leaned forward and captured her breast in his mouth, suckling her nipple to a straining peak, and then the other, as she pounded herself down on him, faster, harder, using all the strength she wished. He gave her more of his own strength as well, now knowing her body could handle more, even if her heart couldn’t.

Oh, Daegan.
She was his, in all ways, because she knew he was hers, even if the two of them went to their graves—or into the sun—without ever admitting it. She wanted to tell herself they had time, an immortal lifespan, to figure it out, but like he’d said, she was afraid that even time might not heal the damage that had been done in that alley, because they’d never put in place the foundation to weather something like that.

But they had this. And she would take it, because an immortal lifespan didn’t make moments of pleasure or unspoken, yearning love any less fleeting.

When they’d both released, and were resting in the aftermath, Daegan was leaning back in the chair. She curled up still astride him, her robe draped over her body. Underneath it, his fingers drifted up and down the valley of her spine. They hadn’t spoken for a while, but since her thoughts had wandered to Gideon, she wasn’t surprised when Daegan’s first spoken words were about him. “I watched the tape of your night together, you know.”

She rubbed her cheek against him. “Why?” she murmured.

“You know why. I saw what you saw. Why he submitted to you. The other Mistresses didn’t work, because he needed more than the domination. He was looking for the connection, the emotional switch that told him she was the right one. He was looking for his liege lady, the one he needed to serve, his savior, his tormenter. An impossible quest in a cynical world of Internet dating and smoky bars with lonely people. But he found her.”

Daegan cocked his head, gazed down at her. “He found you. And that is Fate,
cher
. I would not argue with it. Not ever.”

She didn’t want him to leave. She wanted them both, even though she understood, in a painful way, why he was going. Why he had to go. His arm constricted around her back, and she lifted his hand from her ribs, pressed her face into it, kissing his palm, hard.

As if Fate had decided to speak at that moment, Daegan’s gaze shifted. Anwyn followed it, though she’d already felt his approach. Gideon leaned in the doorway, his arms crossed, thumbs hooked in his armpits, that cocky, cynical posture that said he could handle anything. Anything she needed. The hungry way he gazed over the curve of her bare back, and Daegan’s large hands pressing against her flesh, made her want him anew.

It almost made her smile, despite the ache in her throat.

If I’m yours, Daegan, then help me. Come back. Don’t let me hurt him.

We will take care of him together,
cher
. That much I promise you.

For the conclusion of Gideon’s story, look for

VAMPIRE TRINITY

coming September 2010 from Berkley Heat

Vampire hunter Gideon Green sure as hell never intended to become a vampire’s servant. But when Anwyn Naime—a woman with whom he shared an unforgettable night—is turned by a vampire pack, they become bound by something far greater than either could have imagined. As a result, Gideon is forced into an uneasy alliance with one of the most terrifying vampires he’s ever encountered: the mysterious Daegan Rei.

Daegan also has a vested interest in Anwyn. His history with the lovely nightclub owner is both intimate and intense. As Gideon and Daegan shepherd Anwyn through her dangerous validation with the Vampire Council, it’s clear the trio must learn to trust each other. But as boundaries between them erode and vulnerabilities surface, Gideon realizes he is no longer the man he thought he was—changed by a strange and unexpected bond with the two new people in his life he can’t survive without:
vampires.