Read Twisted Mind (Chequered Flag #2) Online
Authors: Mia Hoddell
Dustin lowered me to the floor, my body sliding against his. Neither of us moved to step back so chest-to-chest I gazed up at him and the longing he exuded startled me. The light green of his eyes darkened to an emerald shade that swirled with hunger.
His hand remained splayed on my back, holding me against him as he dipped his head.
On impulse, I shut my eyes and my lips parted in anticipation of feeling him against me once more.
The warm caress of his breath washing over my skin sent a spike of electricity through my body to raise the hairs on the back of my neck. When the light above me was blocked out I inhaled sharply, waiting for the second his mouth would meet mine.
I leaned in, desperate to feel him.
Finally, his lips grazed mine in barely a whisper of a touch.
A moan of protest slipped from my lips when he parted and the musical sound of Dustin’s husky laugh caused me to shiver.
“We shouldn’t be doing this,” he murmured, shocking me when his lips scraped my ear.
“I really don’t care.”
Dustin cupped my jaw, his thumb swiping over my cheekbone. The touch drew my eyes to his.
“I should though.”
I rested my head further into his palm and covered the back of his hand with my own to keep him there. Turning, I pressed my lips to his palm. “What’s the worst that could happen?”
“You could break me.”
I nipped at the tip of his finger when he trailed it over my bottom lip. “Aren’t we both already broken?”
“You could shatter me like no one else, Taz.” Rather than meet my eyes he stared off into the distance over my shoulder. “You could destroy me.”
I reached up, taking his jaw between my fingers and forcing his attention back to me. “I don’t want to.”
“That doesn’t mean you won’t.”
“No, but it means I’ll do everything in my power to try not to.”
The resolve in his eyes wavered. He couldn’t meet my gaze for long. He exhaled heavily, and his jaw kept tensing beneath my palm.
“Dustin,” I said, drawing his focus back to me. “It’s only a kiss.”
It wasn’t. We both knew I was lying and if we started down this road it would lead to more.
Regardless, Dustin pulled me into him. Pressing on the small of my back, he didn’t stop until I was flush against his chest. With his other hand he swiped back a lock of hair to slide it behind my ear.
He lowered his head, dipping until his forehead rested against mine. “I’m trusting you, Taz.”
I responded in a whisper, “Me too. You’re not the only one who stands to lose, Dust.”
Finally, he closed the gap between us and his lips met mine slowly, but forcefully. He claimed and possessed me, marking me as his with his mouth.
Every ounce of pain and fear was shared through our kiss.
When I parted my lips Dustin’s tongue immediately swept into me. I moaned, raising my arms to encircle him. I ran my fingers through the shaggy locks of hair at the back of his neck, pulling on them until he grunted against me.
Even though no space remained between us, Dustin forced me against him harder then dropped his head to my shoulder. He placed a tender kiss directly over the pulse point in my neck and mumbled against my skin, “Please don’t break me, Taz.”
I held him in place and squeezed. I wanted to promise him I wouldn’t, only the ball of guilt lodged at the back of my throat refused to let me lie. All I could promise him was I’d try, and it wasn’t what he needed to hear.
Dustin
“Hey guys.”
“Oh joy,” I muttered sarcastically against Taz’s neck, recognising the voice. Reluctantly, I raised my head and untangled myself from Tazia’s grip, missing her sweet, sugary smell immediately. However, I refused to drop my arms from around Taz’s waist, forcing her to spin until her back pressed against my chest and my hands splayed over her stomach. Resting my chin on her head, the comforting smell of her shampoo soothed me.
Perry broke away from my glower to regard our position with suspicion and annoyance. I couldn’t help but smirk at him.
“Great, we can go out to celebrate then. I’ll book a table. Does eight thirty work for you?” Perry’s comment dragged me from my thoughts. I glared at the top of Tazia’s head when she nodded against me. I knew she couldn’t see me, although I hoped she felt the heat burning into her.
What had I missed?
“Okay, good. I’ll see you then.” With a nervous wave at Taz and an irritated scowl directed at me, Perry entered the stairwell to leave us alone once more.
As soon as the door clattered shut I spun Tazia around. “What was that about?”
Taz tilted her head to the side. “Jealous?”
A low growl rumbled in my throat. “Don’t test me, Taz.”
She framed my jaw with both of her hands, angling it down so my eyes met hers. “It’s only dinner. I agreed to it before I’d even met you. It’s my way of saying thank you to him.”
“For what?”
“Helping me move in.”
I trailed my hand from around her waist to take her hand. With the other I pushed open my door and dragged her in behind me.
“Dustin, slow down!” she cried, hopping along after me and struggling to keep up with my furious strides. I didn’t know what had come over me, but I felt the need to imprint upon her that she was mine and I didn’t take kindly to mind games.
I backed her into the wall, caging her in with my body. “Tell me you won’t go.”
She attempted to fold her arms, only the minute gap I’d left between us allowed for little movement. She settled for a huff. “I’m a grown woman, I can do whatever I bloody want, Dustin.”
I braced one arm by the side of her head, allowing it to support my full weight, and I leaned over her.
“Tell me, Taz.”
“Why can’t I go? What’s wrong with him? You’ve been weird about it since the first day I came over. What’s all the bad blood between you two about?” Her lips set in a defiant line, her eyes cool and calculating. It was the total opposite from how she’d been looking at me only moments ago.
Fucking Perry.
“There isn’t any bad blood. I just know he’s not a good guy.”
She snorted a laugh. “He seems harmless to me. What’s he going to do with the tiny body he’s got?”
“He preys on women, Tazia. That bumbling, always smiling neighbour thing he has going on is an act. Deep down he’s a pervert.”
This time she laughed for real. “Says the guy who’s pinned me to a wall with a hard-on.”
“Damn it, Taz!” I punched the wall. My fist landed next to her head and the plasterboard shuddered. I regretted it immediately. Tazia recoiled from me, her eyes and mouth wide in fear. Her reaction gutted me in a second. My body felt cold as my heart recalled all of the blood it’d pumped out at a rapid rate. The only sound filling the distance between us, which suddenly felt like a gorge, were my shallow breaths.
I screwed my eyes shut and focused on calming myself. When I finally spoke, I made an effort to soften my voice. “Can you
please
trust me on this?”
“I can’t back out now. I owe him for helping me. Which, by the way, wouldn’t be necessary if you hadn’t knocked me over in the first place.” A defiant glint sparkled in her eyes. Normally, I found her challenges sexy, though this time it only irritated me.
I rested my head on my fist. “You’re never going to let me forget that, are you?”
She hummed, feigning thought, and dragged the sound out for a full five seconds before answering me. “Nope.”
I refrained from rolling my eyes. Knowing I had no hope of winning against her stubborn resolve, I asked, “It’s only dinner?”
“It’s only dinner.”
“Fine, but he’d better keep his hands to himself.”
“And why’s that?” She smiled, and her eyes held the laughter she wanted to release.
“Isn’t it obvious, Taz? You’re mine now, and I don’t share.”
She giggled and the sound sent a warm trickle of pleasure into my bloodstream. “Are you sure you want to do this? Us I mean.”
I settled my lips over hers. It should have only been a quick peck, yet when I tasted her I couldn’t pull myself away. Her lips quirked up against mine, only encouraging me further.
Tazia placed her hands on my chest to push me away, and I moved my attack to her jaw, then her neck. Trailing over her skin quickly, I reached her collarbone and grazed the sensitive spot there with my teeth.
“All right, I get the message.” She giggled, the sound tingling against my mouth. When she gave me one final shove I broke away and caught a glimpse of the aquarium in the corner of the room.
“Hey, Michael, Ralf. You survived! The crazy lady didn’t kill you.” I headed over to check on my seahorses. Crouching down so I was level with the cabinet, I watched them both swimming around.
Tazia’s stare burned into my back.
“Did she look after you properly? I swear I’ll find someone better next time.”
“Hey, don’t be an ass,” Tazia protested. “I looked after them perfectly. By the end I think I started to prefer their company.”
I spun around and raised an eyebrow to give Taz a crooked grin. “Now who’s being an asshole?”
Tazia huffed dramatically, and placed one hand on her hip. “Fine, I’ll take mine back if you take yours back.”
“No deal. You’re not caring for them again.”
She glared at me in disbelief, her mouth opening to spew what I assumed would be an argument. Once again I’d managed to darken her eyes to a shade of black which should have been impossible.
It was strange, the same expression from Elora had me backing away and preparing to defend myself from a shower of punches or objects hurled at me. However, from Tazia it only made me want to push her further. She stunned me normally, yet something about the fire in her eyes made her look powerful, in a hot way, and I revelled in it.
Since I told her everything, I’d been worried she’d treat me differently, even if it happened subconsciously. Every time we argued I waited for her to stifle her anger and physical contact, but she never did. It was one of the many reasons I decided to take the risk and give a relationship with her a try. Tazia was different from everyone else. When I spoke I saw her understanding and rather than feel sympathy for me, empathy emanated from her.
I only wished I knew why.
“Why the hell not? I did a perfect job!” she cried, storming across the room. Her cast thumped against the wooden floor until she stopped directly in front of me.
I parted my legs, drawing her between them. Then slowly, I ran my hands up over her calves and continued along her back as I stood.
I chuckled. “You know, your parents did a good job with your name.”
Tazia regarded me with confusion. “Why?” She drew out the word suspiciously.
“You’re like Taz, the Tasmanian Devil.”
Her mouth opened and closed silently, like a goldfish, while she struggled to find a retort.
“At least without the spitting, bad breath, general ugliness, and lack of English,” I went on.
“Keep digging, Dustin, and this relationship will be over quicker than it started.”
I stifled a laugh at the three cute little lines right between her eyebrows. “But those were nice things.”
“Uh huh…you keep telling yourself that.”
I dipped to smooth the frown lines with my lips. “Anyway, there’s a reason I don’t want you looking after Michael and Ralf.”
She grumbled and folded her arms. “Why?”
“Because I want you at my next race.”
She hadn’t been expecting me to say that, the shock plastered on her face made that clear. I also wasn’t ashamed to admit I got a small amount of pleasure from being able to stun her into silence.
With what appeared to be an enormous amount of energy, Tazia composed herself and feigned nonchalance. “We’ll see. I might have something on.”
“
Sure
you do,” I drawled out sarcastically. She’d be at my next race and she knew it.
Tazia
I was free.
Finally!
After eight eternal weeks, my cast had been removed.
It turned out I had to wait a little longer to ditch the crutches completely though. After the plaster had been cut off, I wanted to dive off the exam table and run out to the car where I’d made Dustin wait. I refused to allow him to see my leg after not being able to shave for eight weeks.
No way in hell would that happen.
My enthusiasm had been quickly snuffed out by my doctor, who held me in place and explained I still needed to take things easy. He’d also given me numerous daily exercises designed to strengthen my leg again.
So I wasn’t
really
free.
Maybe half free.
At least I’d been given the all clear to return to work in a few weeks and I didn’t have to lug around a lump of stone with me.
After a copious amount of warnings and instructions, I was finally able to leave. With more of a bounce—or sway—to my gait, I exited the hospital where Dustin instantly appeared at my side.
“You’re still on crutches.” He scowled down at the offending pieces of metal extending my limbs. “Is everything okay? Did it not heal properly?”
I placed a hand on his arm, calming him. “I’m fine. I only have to take it easy and strengthen my leg again since I haven’t used it for eight weeks.”
“Are you sure?”
His scrutiny made me think he was one second away from curling me into his arms and carrying me over to the car. Whilst I didn’t think I’d have minded being in his arms one bit, I didn’t want the scene. “Come on, I’m ready to go home. I really need a shower.”
A devilish smirk erased his frown. He bent over, tugging at the bottom of my jeans I was glad to be able to wear once more. “Let me see. You probably look like Bigfoot!”
I stepped back out of his reach and batted away his hand with my crutch. “Leave me alone. You are
not
seeing my leg.”
“One peek.”
I swatted away his attempt for a second time. “No. Look at your own leg. I’d have thought you were used to it by now.”
“Not on my girlfriends I haven’t.” He grinned up at me, showing me his teeth.
“I’m your girlfriend?”
Dustin righted himself and his teasing faltered ever so slightly while his gaze darted over my shoulder. “Of course. What else would you be?”
I shrugged. “I don’t know. Friend? Or neighbour with benefits?”
He growled in disgust. “First of all, I don’t do that. Secondly, if I did, what kind of benefits am I getting besides baked goods? Your cooking may be orgasmic, but it’s not really the benefit I’m after.”
I ignored the comment about my cooking; he didn’t need me encouraging him. I did, however, scrunch up my nose in distaste. “Why do you sound so offended? Your brother does it all of the time and then has it splashed across the magazines.”
“I’m not my brother, and there’s a reason he
used
to be like that. He’s utterly devoted to Raine again now. At the time he was going through some messed up shit—”
“So are you.”
He huffed. “Taz, I’ve never been that guy and I never will be. I thought I made that clear a couple of days ago.”
I finally allowed my smile to shine through. It had been an effort to keep it under control. “I know, I just like messing with you. I’m happy to be your girlfriend.”
“You’ll pay for that later.”
I lifted one shoulder, unfazed. “Can it wait until after I get home from dinner? I don’t have long to get ready and there’s a lot to do.”
“Like what? Throw on some trackies and a hoody, preferably one of mine, and hey presto. It won’t even take you five minutes.” He draped an arm over my shoulders and awkwardly guided me to his car.
“Stop being a caveman. I told you it’s only dinner.”
“Yeah, it’s only dinner with the biggest pervert in our building.”
I rolled my eyes even though he couldn’t see me. “Old argument, Dustin. I’m going no matter what you say.”
He dropped a kiss to the top of my head. “Stubborn woman.”
“You haven’t seen anything yet.”
* * *
It took an enormous amount of effort, but I managed to persuade Dustin to leave me alone to get ready. His attempt to veto any outfit that dared to show a sliver of skin drove me insane and also slowed down the process.
I understood his reservations about me having dinner with Perry. I wasn’t exactly thrilled with the situation myself. Still, we’d only been together for a couple of days and possessiveness wasn’t a trait I’d become accustomed to. The only reason I bit my tongue throughout every comment was because I knew he had lingering issues.
Nevertheless, even I had a breaking point and after the third outfit—I’d changed because I wanted to, not for him—I drew the line and kicked him out. Funnily, all it took was threatening his supply of macarons and he left the room quicker than The Flash.
At eight fifteen I’d finished hooking my necklace around my neck when someone knocked on my door. Spinning the angel wing pendant around so it rested on my breastbone, I ran my fingers over the metal feathers and cast my gaze skywards. With a shaky breath I blinked away my tears, gathered all of my belongings into my shoulder bag, and drew up my best polite, people-pleasing façade.
I opened the door to find Perry mostly behind a bouquet of bright yellow daisies. I half expected Dustin to jump out into the hallway and give him hell. However, as I took the flowers with thanks and set them on the side table his door didn’t even crack.
“You look great,” Perry said.
I’d settled on a midnight blue, off the shoulder skater dress. The last time I’d been able to dress up felt like forever ago, and whilst it wasn’t for the man I wanted, I loved any excuse to put on a pretty dress, full make-up, and feel good about myself. I only wished I’d been able to wear heels too, except it didn’t seem like the best idea considering my dodgy leg. I’d gone with simple ballet pumps.
“Thanks.” I shuffled out into the hallway, slipping my arms into my crutches on the way out.
The action caught Perry’s attention immediately.
“I thought your leg had healed.” His tone sounded accusatory and his stare burned into the crutches like he could melt them.
“It is, but I still need to take it easy.”
He flicked his eyes to mine with uncertainty. “Maybe we should postpone this until you’re fully recovered.”
“Don’t worry about me, I’m fine. I’ve been stuck in that freaking cast for eight weeks so this is a vast improvement.”
The silence that followed unnerved me. For a while Perry said nothing, staring at me. It felt like he was trying to work his way inside my thoughts and force me to change my mind. If that really was the case he was out of luck. I wanted this meal over and done with so I could pay my debt and move on.
Eventually Perry nodded. “Okay, if you’re sure.” It didn’t look okay by his cool expression.
We walked to the lift, and Perry pressed the call button.
We rode down in silence, then stepped out of the lift and walked to where his car was parked.
“How did you break your leg again?” he asked. “I don’t think you ever told me.”
“A stupid accident. It’s not even worth telling the story.”
“I’d like to hear it.”
He placed a hand on my back and opened the door for me. Rather than answer his question, I slid into the passenger’s seat and waited for him to shut the door behind me. For once my brain had abandoned me and left me to fend for myself with conjuring a plausible lie.
Perry slid into the driver’s seat and put the key into the ignition. “You don’t have to tell me, Tazia, though I’d be interested if you did.”
“I fell off a ladder trying to clean the gutters,” I blurted out. It sounded credible, right? People broke their legs all of the time by falling off ladders.
It must have been believable because Perry nodded and pulled away from the curb.
I didn’t know what to expect for where he was taking me, yet I had never imagined a restaurant on the outskirts of Milton Keynes with dim lighting and classical music. A part of me must have figured we weren’t going to McDonalds since I dressed up, but the setting was more intimate than I predicted. It only became worse when the waiter left us to deliver our orders to the kitchen.
Perry had requested a table in the furthest corner from the bar. Hidden mostly from view in the shadows, it had obviously been designed for private dining.
Maybe Dustin had been right.
I wasn’t naive. I’d known what Perry’s offer implied when I’d accepted, though I never thought he’d be so obvious.
“How are you liking your new flat?” Perry took a sip of his wine. It had some fancy name I couldn’t remember, let alone pronounce. The most I knew was the colour, red. Perry had ordered it after studying the wine list for a few minutes. Whether he actually knew what he was talking about, or picked a random bottle based on the price and tried to sound confident I couldn’t tell. However, if he thought wine impressed me, he couldn’t have been more wrong. Dessert was the one and only way to my heart.
“It finally feels like home even if I’d like to spend less time there. I think if I spend any more days locked up it’s going to start feeling like a padded cell.”
Perry chuckled.
“At least I can go back to work now. Things are looking up.”
His lips curved over the rim of his glass. “Oh yeah? Where do you work?”
My instinct told me not to tell him, yet once again I couldn’t come up with a lie quick enough. “I make the cakes at a local bakery.”
“You bake?” He sounded genuinely surprised and I didn’t know whether to take offence. What the hell had he thought I did?
“Uh yeah? Why?”
“No reason. I pegged you more as the secretarial type.”
I didn’t know whether to be insulted or not. I saw nothing wrong with secretarial work, but wasn’t he basically saying I was only good at following orders?
My expression must have betrayed my thoughts, because Perry reached across the table to cover my hand with his. While his thumb drew lines across the back of my wrist he rushed to clarify what he’d meant. “Because you’re hot. I can picture you with your hair tied up, bright red lipstick, and a tight pencil skirt with a low cut blouse.”
I barely held back a disgusted growl. How did that comment make him sound any better?
Dustin
had
been right.
I hated to admit it, yet it rapidly became clear I’d misjudged Perry.
I snatched my hand back. “Well I’m not. I work in chef whites and most days I come home covered in flour or batter.”
I hoped it would remove the images he had in his head.
It didn’t.
“So you’re a dirty girl? I can work with that.”
The waiter arrived with our meals. I bit down on my lip almost hard enough to draw blood to stop the viscous comment slipping free while the plates were set down in front of us.
Apparently, Perry didn’t know how to read body language either because when the waiter left he continued despite my cool stare, tensed shoulders, and repeated stabbing at my food.
“You’ll have to bring some of your cookies upstairs sometime soon. I’d love to taste them.”
Maybe I read too much into it, but something about the way he said
‘cookies’
led me to believe we were not talking about biscuits.
“You’ll have to fight Dustin for that privilege. The guy’s incredibly protective over his macarons and I don’t think he’d let it go if I took them to you instead.”
At the mention of Dustin, Perry’s eyes narrowed. He slid his hand back across the table and picked up his napkin to dab at his mouth. “You cook for Coates?”
I delayed answering by taking a bite of my spaghetti carbonara. All too soon I needed to swallow and cursed myself for bringing up Dustin. Something had blatantly happened between them since even the mention of the other’s name created a hostile reaction, in both of them.
“I’ve baked for him a few times, mostly to say thank you for helping me out because of my leg.” A prickling heat trailed over my spine. I could feel someone’s gaze upon me and it wasn’t Perry, who was staring at me like he wanted to curse Dustin. I glanced over my shoulder to search the room.
When I found Dustin smirking at me from across the restaurant, I gasped.
He saluted me with his glass then took a sip.
The prick.
A strange mixture of relief and anger flowed through me. Relief because Perry wouldn’t get away with shit with Dustin in the room, and anger because he had the audacity to follow us. When I lifted my hand to flick the Vs at him, Perry took my chin between his fingers to draw my attention back to him. He wasn’t rough about the action, yet the startling nature of it made me recoil back into my seat with a squeak.