Authors: Chloe T Barlow
That didn't ease the frantic worry she felt at the thought of almost losing Griffen, though.
Aubrey adjusted the ice pack again, causing Althea to wince. Her head wound was more worrisome than the drugs, but she hadn't needed stitches and they said she could go home under the supervision of Jenna. All that was well and good, but Griffen had to be rushed off to surgery as soon as the ambulance got him to the hospital. There was no way Althea was leaving, which meant she had a little entourage hovering over her in the waiting room.
Johnny's head was on her lap as he slept. While Jenna and Carol worked to get help to Althea's house Aubrey had pulled Johnny out of school and rushed to their side to help in any way she could — which unfortunately involved a dripping ice bath down Althea's back.
"I can't believe Griffen rescued you. That was pretty awesome. Even you have to admit it, Brey," Jenna stated.
"Not bad. If he pulls through I'll be really nice to him.” Aubrey paled when a half-squawk, half-sob escaped Althea's throat. "Oh my God, Tea, I'm such an asshole. I was just kidding, of course he'll be okay. Jenna said he would be and she knows. Christ. Oh shit, Jenna, say
something
. Fix it, please!"
Jenna sighed, "Take a break from talking, Brey, that's a good start. And chill out while you're at it. Jeez. You're the most insensitive person in the world sometimes.” Jenna put an arm over Althea's shoulder and soothingly said, "Griffen will be fine. Gunshot wounds to the shoulder are tricky, but it was at a good spot and went pretty cleanly through. I know the surgeon taking the lead and he's great."
"I wish it were you doing it. You're the best."
"Oh, no way. Doctors should never operate on family or friends, or the men their best friends are crazy about. I will help him recover, though, I promise. For now, just don't listen to Brey's lame attempts at humor. I'll beat her up if you like?"
Althea chuckled. "Maybe. Let me think about it. I'm just on edge is all. Seeing him laying there in all that blood, knowing my last words to him were so angry...”
Those words were still caught in her throat, when she heard, "Mrs. Tate?"
"Huh?" Althea grunted.
"She's right here," Jenna said with her comfortable air of authority that Althea called her "doctor" voice.
"Go with it," she whispered in response to Althea's confused look. "It's the only way I could get you in there so soon after his surgery."
"That's me," she whispered on a swallowed breath. "Can you just give me one second?” The nurse nodded sympathetically.
Althea reached over and hugged Johnny closely until he woke up.
"Hi Mommy. Is Uncle Gwiff awake yet?"
"No baby, I need to go see him and wait until he wakes up.” A tear welled in her eye until it threatened to break free. She breathed deeply. "I love you Johnny. Please stay here with Aunt Brey and Aunt Jenna while I visit with Uncle Griffen, okay?"
"Sure. I love you too, Mommy. Please tell Uncle Gwiff I hope he gets better soon and I'm glad he's your boyfwiend."
"What? Huh? How did you know?"
"Duh, Mom," he said sleepily. "I'm five. I'm not stupid.” With that, he hugged her, then grabbed Jenna's hand and climbed into her lap.
The nurse waited for Althea and said, "Your husband's right this way."
That word jarred her almost as much as the gunshot had but she steeled herself to act normally.
The nurse opened the door and quietly said, "The doctor will be around later, but I can tell you he did well in surgery and came out of the anesthesia fine. He woke up in the recovery room, but it's common to keep resting now that he's been moved to his room. Just be patient, okay," she said with a soft smile.
Althea nodded unconsciously and looked over at Griffen lying in the hospital bed asleep. He was so beautiful and peaceful lying there, but all she wanted was to see a smirk on his face while he made some cocky comment to her. She brushed her hand across his wavy hair, trying to ignore the machines and wires all around him and the smell of antiseptic burning her nostrils.
Despite the nurse's kind words, she couldn't tamp down the stifling fear that came with almost losing him, too.
Death is permanent. It is not a fight you can make up over or a mistake you can apologize for. It's the end. And she'd almost faced that end all over again.
Maybe she would never know for sure what Jack would've wanted for her, but she really believed he wouldn't want her to be isolated forever and he would've wanted Griffen to be happy, too. Griffen coming into her life had been a gift, but she'd denied and pushed back against it for so long. Now, she simply wanted to hold onto him and never let go.
As she sat by his bed, she clutched his hand and leaned toward him, "Griffen, please wake up. Don't leave me, too. Please.”
She jumped when someone opened the door and whispered, "Hi.”
Althea turned to see Carol standing in the door, not missing that she'd glanced down to where she and Griffen's hands were joined. Althea's heart sped up a bit, but she swallowed and looked straight at Carol, resisting the urge to pull her hand away.
"Hi Carol. What are you doing here?" Althea winced at the harshness of the words, but she couldn't keep letting life — and this woman — steamroll her.
"I'm so sorry to disturb you. Jenna helped me get back here. I don't know if she pulled strings or has just been growing Griffen's family tree by the minute. Val wants to see him too, of course, but she was nice enough to let me come in first — because I need to talk to you.”
"Okay."
She sat in a small chair against the wall and stared at Althea and Griffen for a moment.
"So, you and Griffen?"
"Yeah. We need to talk when he wakes up, but...I hope so."
Carol nodded. "I'm sorry Althea."
"For what?"
"For letting you be trapped in grief with me. For not doing anything to help either of us move on. I...I don't think I ever accepted that Jack was gone. I know that's part of what I was supposed to do, but if I did that, I knew it would really be over. He'd really be..." she gulped. "You know."
"You lost your son."
"Yeah, but I held you back in misery with me. I lost Jack's dad. Then Jack. I just needed something to stay the same. You and Johnny were a part of that, of my own way of not letting Jack go or be forgotten. I didn't even stop to think about how that would affect you."
"I didn't exactly fight you Carol. I wanted to turn back time, too."
"True, but I think I gave you another excuse not to move on, and for that I really am regretful. If I could keep treating you as Jack's wife the world would never change. I guess I thought through you and Johnny, I could keep Jack alive."
"I wanted that, too.” Althea swallowed and looked down at Griffen's still hand in hers.
Carol stood and crossed to Althea, putting her hand on her shoulder.
"It's one thing to want something you can't have. It's another to let that want control you until it is all you know. Life is short. If anything, losing Jack and his father should've taught me that. Don't forget how precious our days and our ability to love are. When I heard what happened to you... What David did...it hit me how wrong I had been. I can't believe I told you I blamed you for Jack's death. It wasn't true and it was so wrong to say it. I almost lost you, too, because of my own blindness. I know it's time for me to think about some changes.”
Carol stared down at Griffen, brushing his hair off his forehead. She turned to look deeply into Althea's eyes and went on. "Griffen's a good man, Althea. He was always like a son to me. He had a rough start to life. I'm not sure I'm totally comfortable with you two together yet, but you deserve to be happy. Both of you do. And I can step back while you figure things out.” With that, Carol kissed Griffen's cheek and then stood and hugged Althea who held her with a fierceness she couldn't believe her exhausted body could muster.
"Carol?” Althea said before she walked out the door.
"Yes?"
"Tha-ank you.” They both heard the break in Althea's voice but Carol simply nodded, one tear glistening on her cheek.
"You're welcome sweetheart.”
She left and Althea simply stared at the door for several minutes before looking back and resting her head on the bed beside Griffen, letting each of his gentle breaths bring her much needed comfort.
Griffen fought the cobwebs in his brain and swallowed through a mouth so dry it felt like he'd been chewing on cotton for an hour. He wanted to fall back into the fluffy cocoon of sleep but the soft scent of cherries and jasmine started to wash across him and he fought his eyes open. He was greeted by a mass of honey hair spread across his chest, a few strands of which were tickling his nose.
"Hi gorgeous," he choked out softly.
Althea jerked awake and smiled down at him and his whole body somehow tensed and relaxed at the same time.
"Hi stud," she whispered and then started sobbing.
"Hey. Shh, come here.” He reached to hold her but pain shot through his whole right side and he winced.
"Oh God. Be careful. You just came out of surgery. David shot you in the shoulder, but you did great. Let me get you some water. Do you need anything else?"
Griffen smirked at the sound of her anxious babbling. He'd been so terrified that he'd never hear it again, so he just let it wash over him, taking the Styrofoam cup of tap water from her trembling hand and sipping it eagerly.
"I'm so glad you're here," he said softly, almost afraid she'd run away.
"I think Jenna called in all her favors. You're practically smothered with attention here. She's the one that got them to let me see you."
"That's the best favor of them all. You look beautiful baby.”
And she did. Her eyes were stormy, mostly green and full of emotion. She was still in the same clothes she'd worn when she'd left him, but now she was safe and with him. He suddenly felt suffused with hope.
She laughed. "Did that surgery mess with your eyesight? I'm a mess."
He smiled at her and winced as he lifted a finger to her cheek.
"You're the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. Do you forgive me?"
"I'm not happy about the secrets, but I understand why you kept it from me."
"I got carried away and should've thought about what hiding that from you would do to you."
"He was innocent, you know. It was all David."
"Right."
"But, what about your book? Will you still write it?"
"That's up to you. If you don't want me to, I won't."
"No, you should write it. I think Jack would've really liked that."
"Yeah?” he asked with a smile. It felt so good to hear her talking about Jack in a way that wasn't full of guilt and pain.
"Yeah.” She rested her head into the nook of his left shoulder and they were quiet like that for a while, just enjoying the comforting feel of the other's warmth and breath.
"Althea?"
"Yes, Griffen?"
"Do you love me?"
She looked up at him and smiled softly.
"Wow, just going for the big stuff right off the bat, huh?"
"It's been a long day. I'm not into small talk right now."
She kissed him gently then pulled back and said, "I know it's crazy, but I think I've loved you for a long time now."
"Thank God,” Griffen sighed.
"Seeing you covered in all that blood, thinking I may have lost you, that really drove it home for me. Griffen, do you love
me
?”
"Of course. I thought that was pretty obvious."
"I can be dense," she giggled.
"Then I'll be clear. I love you so much, gorgeous.” He touched her face softly with his small amount of energy and she leaned over to brush his lips with hers.
"I wanted to feel guilty for loving you when you'd been Jack's before, and then I felt guilty for being angry that he found you first," Griffen whispered. "I keep trying to identify the moment I fell in love with you, but I can't. I think I've always been in love with you. Before I even met you. I was just waiting for you to show up. When I saw you in that bar, I knew...I knew it would be you. You know, I was thinking about your nightmares and I realized you've done the reverse to me. You took my hand and turned me from dust into a whole person. Please let me try to make you happy. Is that clear enough for you?” he added with a smirk.
"Crystal. It's just so fast it's got to be nuts, right?"
"I don't think so. All that matters is we know how we feel. Part of me would love to jump ahead in time to when we're old and have been together forever so I can prove to you what we feel is for real — but I'm just going to need to ask you to trust me. I don't know what life will hold for us but I do know when I look in the future I don't see a day without your face in it."
"Careful, you keep up all that flowery language and you may need to start writing romance novels, stud."
"Whatever you want baby," he laughed and held her hand tighter. "I think I can write a romance about you. You're so beautiful and sexy, but you're also so sweet, so smart, so very...you. I love being with you in a big room full of people and knowing you're mine. But, I'd like to feel like you're proud to be mine."