THERE BE DRAGONS (12 page)

Stephens stepped over a few of the bodies and Teacher followed.

Stephens poked at the dead with the barrel of his rifle, or gave them a kick. No movement came from them, bar what transferred from him. With some prods he could smell burnt flesh, with some kicks he could hear a sticky liquid squelch.

He heard the thunder again. This time he was not startled. He kept his composure. “No lightning,” he said.

The rain beat down hard. Blood flowed around his and Teacher’s boots.

“Jacobs did good on ambush tonight. He handled himself and fought like a full-fledged member of the platoon. He even led with skill,” said Stephens.

“Yeah, I’m kinda shocked though,” said Teacher.

“The change has started.” Stephens smiled. “He must be in the cocoon stage now. By the end of our next firefight, there is a chance; he’ll be in the beautiful, brutal, bloodied, butterfly stage. It’s sure to happen any day soon. I coulda sworn Jacobs woulda bought it quickly though. Shot as soon as guns started to bark at each other. Denied the chance to be a god. It ain’t often I get the measure of a man wrong. But I welcome the mistake.”

“Am I a god?” asked Teacher.

“With the risk of breaking your half-wit heart with a no. No, shit-bird.”

Teacher hung his head low.

“I’ve become an expert of Nam,” continued Stephens, “the war, the enemy, and my own soldiers; everything has started to become predictable. Even in battle I’ve started to have an ability to see a few moves ahead of the action. I’ve studied the rats long enough to know how they work, to know how they react to certain stimuli. All these reasons add to my numbness, but maybe Jacobs’s presence can help to alleviate that feeling. Even if just ever so slightly. Maybe my inability to predict Jacobs could be just what I need. That glorious chaos I crave.”

“Maybe, Sarge.” Teacher looked confused.

“Sometimes I don’t know why I talk to you, Teacher. You’re the kinda guy that would piss into the wind. Get back to the Doc. That’s an order.”

“Okay.”

Teacher left and Stephens continued into the dark jungle.

Stephens came around a tree and saw it.

One of the dragons.

It was chewing on the leg of a wounded NVA soldier. The trooper was sat with his back to a tree. He was smiling.

The dragon looked at Stephens.

It had a wingspan of five feet. The wing membrane extended between the fingers and toes as webbing. The finger and toe claws were covered in keratin sheaths that extended and curved into sharp hooks well beyond their bony cores.

The skull was long and narrow. It had a crest on the top of it that extended upwards into a backward curving structure.

The jaws were straight apart from small hooks on the very tips. Both upper and lower hooks no larger than the fangs that surrounded them.

It had more than ninety large conical teeth in its beak-like mouth. The teeth extended back from the tips of both jaws and became smaller farther into the mouth they went.

The dragon was covered in scales like any other reptilian creature.

Stephens fired at the beast.

The burst of bullets hit it in the chest. It screamed at him, showed blood and flesh stuck to its teeth. With a thump of thunder, it flapped its wings and took off into the air.

Stephens fired off some shots after it. But the darkness had already camouflaged the dragon. It had made its escape.

Diaz ran into the scene. His M-16 aimed at the sky. “Did you hit it?”

“I think so,” said Stephens.

“What was it?” Diaz lowered his rifle. “Was it one of the dragons?”

“Don’t tell the other men about this.”

“But …”

“Did you hear me?” Stephens raised his voice.

“Yes, but …”

“Not a word.” He pointed at Diaz.

The wounded NVA started to laugh and speak Vietnamese, rapidly. Blood ran from the corners of his mouth.

“What’s that crazy son of a bitch saying, Diaz?” asked Stephens.

“He says we’ll never win this war. He says they’ll never win this war. The dragon will win. The jungle belongs to the dragon. To God. He is now a part of God. God has feasted on his flesh. They are as one.”

Stephens shot the NVA in the face. “Remember, not a word.”

“I guess,” answered Diaz.

“Don’t guess. Do.”

“Okay.”

“Get back to the platoon.”

Diaz walked away.

“Forget Jacobs,” Stephens said to himself. “The dragon can be my chaos. The dragon can end the numbness. The dragon is a worthy opponent.”

• • • • •

The next day, back at the LZ, Jacobs was sat alone on the edge of a foxhole. He held a letter in one of his hands, a cigarette in the other.

“I didn’t know you smoked,” Maxwell said as he sat down next to him.

“I didn’t. Or don’t. I got the smoke from Jackson. I thought under the circumstances, it was called for.”

“I heard the ambush was … eventful.”

“That’s one way to put it,” said Jacobs.

“How are you holding up?”

“I’ve got to deal with more losses. More of my men have died. I didn’t even know the names of them. I’ve been trying to decide if that makes it easier and in a funny way … it does. The guilt is less personal. It’s different to the feelings I felt after Cook’s death. I’d known his name, had spoken to him, spoken to him in a less than friendly manner. I’d seen his death up close and that made a difference to the taste of culpability in my gut. It was sourer, had more of a sting. The men I lost in the firefight last night had been like living pawns in a game of chess I’d been playing. I can’t believe I’ve thought of them like that. I can’t believe I’ve equated them to pawns. How could I think of living, breathing creatures—human beings—as just expendable chess pieces?”

“I think you are starting to understand what it takes to command,” said Maxwell.

“If so, why am I so confused?”

“Perhaps that’s what it feels like to have this kind of responsibility.”

“I’ve now also got to process the fact that I’ve killed. I choked a man to death. I looked in his eyes as the life left him. I felt his last breath on my cheek.” Jacobs took another drag.

Maxwell swallowed.

“A friend of mine, Lynch, had asked me if I could kill a man. I have the answer to that now. The same friend had said some men in training didn’t refer to the enemy as human beings. They only thought of them as targets. I guess I have already started to do the same.”

“You’ve got to justify the killing anyway you can. If you don’t find a way to do that, you could lose your mind. It will eat you up. Thinking of them as only targets is sound advice,” said Maxwell.

“Have I begun to turn into what Stephens predicted? Maybe I have.”

“I’ve told you, you will not become like him.”

“I can’t deny the facts for much longer. I can’t hide from myself. I’ve got to accept the change, or end the change. End it in the way Stephens had said it was possible to end it,” said Jacobs.

“Give yourself time to process last night’s events. Once you’ve had breathing room, you’ll be fine. You’ll realize how far off the mark Stephens is.”

“That course of action, the way to end it, is becoming more attractive as the morning progresses. I also have a final set of information I’ve got to process, the information in this letter.” Jacobs waved the paper in front of the reporter’s face.

“What’s in the letter?” asked Maxwell.

“I wish I could have died in the firefight. It would have spared me all this pain,” said Jacobs.

“Don’t talk like that, Ethan.”

“It’s the way I feel.”

“Excuse me, sir.”

Jacobs and Maxwell looked up and saw Diaz.

“Not now, Private,” said Jacobs.

“I’m sorry to bother you, but it’s really important,” said Diaz.

“I don’t think I’m the right person to be discussing important matters with at the moment.”

“Are you okay, LT?” Diaz kept his voice low so none of the other men could hear. The rest of the platoon were scattered about the LZ, most of them chowing down.

“I’ll be honest, Private. I’m pretty far from okay right now.”

Diaz took a seat on the foxhole next to Jacobs. “I remember after my first firefight. I was pretty shaken up. I was in a bad way. Then I started to think, I’m alive. It hadn’t crossed my mind for some reason, that I had managed to survive, as odd as that might sound. I then realized I’d get to write home and keep my loved ones’ hearts warm. I’d get to bring them the hope I might return home someday. Hope is a powerful thing. So now after a firefight, I always try to think about how pleased the people back home will be that I’m still ticking.”

“You have people back home who care for you?” asked Jacobs.

“I have my parents and two young sisters.”

“No girlfriend? No wife?”

“No. No girl,” said Diaz.

“You’re lucky.”

“Why’s that? Do you not have loved ones back home?”

“I have my parents,” said Jacobs.

“Then that’s all you need. You don’t need a girl to know your worth. You’ll have plenty of time to find a nice girl after the war, anyway.”

Jacobs cleared his throat then filled it with smoke. “You see, that is the trouble. I had a nice girl before I got in this war.”

“Oh, I see. So you ended it with her before you came in country? I’ve heard of people doing that,” said Diaz.

“No, I didn’t end it. She did.”

“That’s tough, LT. How’d she do it? If you don’t mind me asking?”

Jacobs inhaled and passed the letter to Diaz. “Read for yourself, Private.”

“I’m so sorry,” said Maxwell.

Diaz took the letter but didn’t look at it. “You know there is a law that stops this. I can’t remember the name of it. But you can report it—and stop it—cuz it is bad for your morale.”

“The private is right,” Maxwell said.

“It doesn’t matter now, does it? It’s already done its damage. And why would I want to stop her? Why would I want to be with someone who doesn’t want to be with me?” A tear ran down Jacobs’s face. He wiped it away quickly.

“I don’t know what to say, cuz I’ve never been through a breakup.” Diaz took a moment to think. “But know this, everything works for the greater good.”

“It does? You’ve got to be kidding me.”

“No, not at all. I know sometimes it might not feel that way, but it does,” Diaz said.

“You sound like my dad.” Jacobs laughed.

“He must be a wise man.” Diaz smiled.

“I guess he is.” Jacobs laughed again and took the letter back from the private. He tore it up and let the pieces of paper fall into the foxhole. “Last night I prayed. You believe that, Maxwell? I prayed. I prayed that I wouldn’t wake up in the morning. That everything would just be … I don’t know. Just darkness.”

“It’s okay to pray,” said Diaz. “But you’re praying for the wrong things.”

“You know what the most upsetting part about praying to die was?” started Jacobs. “It wasn’t that I had resorted to such; it was because it didn’t work. I’ve never asked God for anything. But when I do, I get nothing. God doesn’t exist, Diaz. Just accept it. It’s like Stephens said, once you come out here, you become a god unto yourself. If I want to die, I have to do something about it.”

“Stephens again?” Maxwell rolled his eyes.

“Don’t listen to that Darwinian trash Stephens spouts!” Diaz lowered his voice and checked no one had heard him. “Don’t start believing in his god. Don’t cast aside the God that loves you. The real God.”

“If He loved me, He would show me He exists. He would give me a reason to want to stay alive.”

“I believe He has,” said Diaz.

“Then show me … show me … please.” Jacobs begged with his hands in praying position.

“Okay, I will. Maxwell, would you mind leaving us alone?”

“No, of course not.” Maxwell stood and placed a hand on Jacobs’s shoulder. “Hang in there, Ethan.”

“The god of evolution,” started Diaz. “The god of death says that dinosaurs lived millions of years ago. The Bible says they lived with us and that the earth is young. About 6,000 years young.”

“What are you talking about?” asked Jacobs.

“I’m talking about the proof you asked for. Evolution claims man and dinosaur never lived together. It claims man evolved from apes. That is why Stephens has this whole twisted idea of how people should behave. He has embraced this ideology. Just like Hitler did. He thinks it’s acceptable for people to act like animals. He thinks of other races as less evolved than himself and others like him. The war has nothing to do with what Stephens has become. Don’t let him use it as an excuse. Okay?”

“You’re comparing Stephens to Hitler?” Jacobs smiled at the absurdity.

“So, if I can prove to you that man and dinosaurs did live together,” Diaz said, “then God must exist, since God himself describes them in the Bible.”