Read The White Cowboy - Complete BWWM Romance Box Set Online
Authors: Susan Westwood
Gemma rushed through her shower, eager to begin the day with Brandon. They planned on making the most of their time together. Brandon was set on staying on his farm in Iowa, but when her car was fixed, she would keep travelling to Hollywood where she had an interview with a music agent.
And tonight she would get to perform at an open mike night in town. She'd been itching to perform since she started this journey, and now she'd get her chance.
But first she had to help Brandon with his chores. As she soaped up, she thought about how it would be painful to say goodbye to him when this is all over. Maybe they'd made a mistake. Maybe she should be avoiding him.
What the hell had she been thinking? How would she ever extricate herself from this situation?
What had seemed clear by the firelight last night was not so clear under the scrutiny of daylight. She paused for a moment and let the water run over her.
She had nowhere to go. She had no options, which was not a situation she often found herself in.
She'd thrown caution to the wind, and grabbed a stranger and taken him to bed. Did she really think she was capable of sex without emotion? But she'd done it with a stranger. One she found attractive, but hadn't really formed an attachment to. One who had been just as willing as she was.
"Damn."
She finished her shower, dried off, and then dressed. They had to talk this out. She didn't know what the solution was.
***
Brandon cleaned up the breakfast dishes, the reality of the situation crashing down on him. He'd taken a virtual stranger to his bed last night. He'd said they would keep it light, but he wasn't a guy who just slept with anyone.
Despite what he'd done last night.
Now he'd committed to two more days of this. Not that it was a hardship to make love to Gemma, but he wondered if he could keep his heart out of it.
Sex had never been just a physical act to him. He'd always attached emotions to it, and had never been able to join in when his friends went out tomcatting.
As he put the dishes in his dishwasher, he wondered if Gemma felt disrespected by what they'd done. She didn't seem to, and breakfast had been a cozy, domestic scene.
God, he was stupid.
As soon as Gemma was on the road, he was back to not dealing with humans. Forever. They complicated things more than he wanted them to.
And now he had a sexy complication in his shower. She was wet and naked, and he had to stop thinking of her. She wasn't his to think about or make plans with.
He heard the shower turn off, and decided things would be better if he was out of the house. Besides, he had a pile of chores to do.
One of the cows was due any day now. In the interest of making his herd better, he'd used sperm from a prize-winning bull. He hoped that the bull hadn't been too big, or his cow might have trouble giving birth.
Finishing quickly in the kitchen, he dressed just as quickly to get outside. The air was cold, the sky heavy and dark. His dog ran in circles around him, his breath steaming.
"Why didn't you stop me, Spike," Brandon said.
The dog barked.
"I know. You couldn't have if you tried. I was determined to take her up on her offer."
He frowned at himself. He considered himself a gentleman, and that had not been chivalrous behavior last night. Berating himself, he knew that this would bother him for days.
And now how was he going to deal with Gemma? If luck were on his side, which he doubted it would be, she would also regret it, and go with the original plan of avoiding each other.
He could spend the day outside with the animals, only entering his house for meals. The idea chafed at him. This was his abode, his sanctuary.
She'd invaded it.
But he'd let her in, and now he gave her a reason to stay.
He sighed.
"That's what I get for thinking with the wrong head."
***
While Brandon was milking the goats, Clint Walker, his sometime worker, poked his head into the barn. "Hey Brandon."
Clint was a true Iowan, born and bred here. Brandon had met him the day he bought the property.
In fact, Clint had kept an eye on it for him when he was still on the rodeo circuit. Now Clint would come by every few days to help Brandon who usually paid him in food.
Clint wouldn't take any money. He was retired, and said that he had plenty of his own. Though, going by his usual uniform of ripped overalls and battered cowboy hat, Brandon wasn't so sure about that.
He'd never been to Clint's house, so he didn't really know much about him, but he did trust the man. He didn't want to judge or give charity if it wasn't needed or wanted.
The food donations had gone over well, and Brandon liked that someone else was enjoying his culinary creations. He'd heard from others in town that Clint's wife was sick and he took care of her. A nurse visited on the days he came to help Brandon.
Brandon wouldn't pry, no matter how curious he was. If Clint wanted him to know things, he would tell him in good time.
He'd found Clint to be a good sounding board, but was a little hesitant to bring up the subject of Gemma. For starters, Brandon was embarrassed at his own behavior.
"You look like you have some stuff on your mind," Clint said.
Of course he would notice. Brandon frowned. Nothing got past his friend. "I have a house guest, Gemma, and I'm not sure what I'm doing."
"You need me to tell you about the birds and the bees?"
Brandon looked up to see a grin on Clint's face. "No need for that. I'm just not sure we aren't playing with fire."
"Sometimes in life you have to grab happiness where it can be found. You haven't had a lot of happiness in your life, so maybe you shouldn't turn this down."
Clint had a point, but Brandon wasn't sure he would deal with the loss when this all ended. His heart was still fragile from Jessica's betrayal. "But she's going away."
"Nothing is in stone, Brandon."
Clint looked past him as if he knew that to be very true.
"I think her plans are pretty well set. She's leaving when her car is fixed." Brandon didn't think he could change her mind, and it wasn't his place to. Jessica had run away to find her spotlight, and he didn't think he could keep anyone else away from their dream.
But he hadn't known about Jessica's dream. She'd never told him. Gemma had been upfront from the beginning.
Clint took off his hat and scratched his head. "Maybe, but why not be happy while she's here?"
Brandon wasn't sure he could do that.
***
Gemma couldn't have felt more relief that Brandon was not in the house. She knew because she would have felt that strong male presence.
The dishes had been done, so she wiped off the counter. With no other chores inside, she knew she had to help him with the outside ones.
With a heavy heart, she dressed for the cold weather. Spike greeted her when she left the house. She'd never been anywhere this cold before. The California sunshine was looking better and better.
But would the people be as warm as Brandon's bed? She blinked. She had to stay the course. She wouldn’t let a man keep her from her dream.
"Where's Brandon, Spike?"
He barked, but instead of leading her anywhere, he ran circles around her. She trudged through the snow to the first barn. Brandon was checking a cow near the doorway.
She observed as he spoke to the animal in low tones, patting its side with one hand and rubbing its belly with the other. The cow seemed to trust him. Should she?
"Hi," she said finally.
He flinched.
Her eyes narrowed. Was he regretting last night also? She chewed the inside of her cheek as she closed the door against the cold.
"Hello," Brandon said.
"Is something wrong with the cow?"
He didn't make eye contact. Not a good sign. "She's pregnant, and I'm just checking on her."
Gemma could count on one hand the facts she knew about cows. They gave milk. She didn't know how or why or when or even how often. Like most consumers, she took it for granted that the milk would be there in the refrigerator at the store when she needed it. "Is she due soon?"
He finally glanced her way. His hat sat low on his brow so she couldn’t see his eyes, but his head was facing her way. She'd take that little concession.
"In about a month, but I found out after she got pregnant just how big the bull was."
She blinked. "You couldn't see how big the bull was?"
Brandon laughed. "She was artificially inseminated. A bull mounting her would hurt her."
Okay, she was a city girl. She wouldn't have known that. "Oh. Didn't know that."
He waved a hand away. He wasn't making fun of her. She liked that. "No need for you to."
She'd come out to do chores, so here she was. "What can I do?"
"I'm done in here," he said. "Can you start on the next barn? You'll find Clint, a friend of mine, in there milking the goats."
He hadn't made eye contact yet. So he was feeling the same regret she was. She'd deal with this when he came to the other barn. If they were alone.
Right now, she'd been dismissed.
Despite regretting what he'd done, Brandon still felt the pull of attraction for her. He didn't want to. He wanted to forget last night happened, but if she looked at him with those doe eyes again, he'd take her right there in the barn.
The harsh light of reality shone on his actions and they'd didn't look so good.
Yes, she was an adult, but she'd been vulnerable last night.
He never should have taken advantage of that. He hadn't thought twice. Just took her to his bed and never realized that he could hurt her.
Brandon looked around the cow barn one more time before heading over to where his horse was. Gemma had already let him out to pasture, and was filling up his water trough. Clint must have things under control in the goat barn.
Brandon only had three goats. He figured any more and that would be too much milk. Thankfully he had a cheese maker who would pick up the milk daily. Otherwise he'd have to dump it. He didn't use but a half gallon a week himself.
"Why doesn't this freeze?" she asked with a shiver.
Gemma asked questions about everything. He didn't remember Jessica ever being that curious about what he did on the farm. "It's heated, for days like this. I turned it on before I did the cows so it would be ready to go by the time I got here."
He leaned on the fence and watched his horse frolic, envying the animal's freedom. How nice it would be to not have a care in the world. That said, he'd take the responsibility of animals over taking care of humans. Hearts were so fragile, and he didn't want to break anyone's.
Or have his own broken again.
"He's a beauty. I'd still like to ride him," she said.
She'd joined him at the fence, her boots crunching in the snow. The day was sunnier than the day before, but he knew that a new storm was due in two days.
He hoped she'd get out of here before then. He understood trying to find your own path. He wished Jessica had shared her need to find her spotlight.
But she'd found it. He heard one of her songs on the radio on his way into town last time. He had to smile a little, but he would have liked to share that with her. The way she'd shared his time in the spotlight.
But then maybe she hadn't shared it as much as tried to hog it. He shrugged. Ancient history.
"I'll let you ride him later. He wants to move around now. Did you see Houdini?"
"He was around here somewhere."
"He'll come back when there's food involved," Brandon said. "He always does."
"Did you find out who he belongs to?"
"No one claimed him. I put a sign up at the post office saying I had him."
"I think he's just lonely. I bet if you put him in with Beans tonight, he'll stay put," she said.
He shrugged, knowing that she had little knowledge of horses. Or any animals, for that matter.
***
Gemma didn't like that he shrugged off her suggestion about Houdini. She could still have an opinion, even if she didn't grow up on a farm.
"I could be right, you know," she said, her arms crossed over her chest.
"Maybe."
"I think you're having remorse about last night and don't want to listen to anything I say."
There. She'd once again pointed out the elephant in the room. Or in this case, the elephant in the pasture. Sometimes that got her in trouble, but she couldn't change her nature. And her parents had always encouraged her to take life head on. She wasn't going to stop because this pig-headed man didn't like it.
He sighed, rubbed his nose. "I have to feed the goats."
He walked away from her as if she had no say in the matter. As if she were inconsequential to his life.
She ran after him, her boots crunching on the frozen grass. Spike chased her as if he thought this was a game. He ran across her path and she almost kicked him. She tried to dodge out of the way, but twisted her ankle and landed hard on her side.
Spike licked her face, which she didn't appreciate. Her ankle hurt and so did her side.
Brandon rushed over to her. "You okay?"
He knelt down, his gaze roving over her. His hands hovered as if he wasn't sure if he should touch her.
She bit her lip. "My ankle hurts."
"Can you walk?"
He held her arm as she stood up. When she tried to put weight on her foot, she buckled from the pain. "Not yet. Maybe I can walk it off."
Brandon frowned, then hoisted her into his arms. He carried her to the house as if she weighed nothing. This close to his face, she wanted to kiss the lines of his brow.
To ease those lines of concern on his face.
And she wanted to make him hard, if truth be told. So he'd take her, completely, the way he had last night. She wanted to break through this awkwardness that had settled between them.
Once inside the house, Brandon set her on the couch. He rested his butt on the coffee table and went to work on getting her boot off.
She cringed. "Ouch."
He looked up at her. He'd put his hat on the table so she could see his whole face. That line of concern down the middle of his forehead deepened.
"Sorry, but if you've really injured yourself, we have to get the boot off before your foot swells up."
She took a deep breath. "Okay. I guess just do it all at once."
He shook his head. "That may cause more damage."
She sighed, then lay back on the couch. "Go ahead."
He shimmed the boot off as she clenched her fists. Next came her sock. He let out a low whistle.
She sat up. "That bad?"
"It's red and hot already. Let me get some ice."
"I could just stick it in the snow," she said, trying to lighten the mood.
"Then you'd get frostbite."
"Oh, right."
***
Brandon poured some snow into a plastic bag. He didn't have much use for ice in the winter, so he'd turned off the icemaker in his refrigerator.
"What's going on?" Clint yelled from the barn.
"I think Gemma sprained her ankle. Can you finish the milking?"
"No, problem."
Brandon wrapped a dishtowel around the snow-packed bag and brought it back to Gemma. She sat, frowning, her foot on his coffee table.
With as much gentleness as he could muster, he put the bag on her ankle. "We should probably take you to the urgent care."
"No emergency room?"
He shook his head, sitting on the coffee table. "Closest hospital is in the same town at that Ford dealer."
"Oh. Yes, maybe we should."
"I'm going to put your sock back on before we leave. Otherwise your toes will freeze out there. But first let me get the truck warmed up."
Happy to leave her presence, Brandon went outside, then started the truck and pulled it right to his front door. She looked like a wounded doe and he didn't have any room in his heart for a wounded animal.
He'd always had a soft spot for them, and that's how Jessica had taught his attention. But she hadn't been wounded. She'd been playing him.
He was sure that Gemma wasn't like that, but he had to steel his heart against any invasion, on purpose or not.
"What about the goats? Shouldn't you feed them first?" she asked when he poked his head in to check on her.
She was right. How had he forgotten them? He could give Clint some instructions. "Let me give them some hay and then I'll be back. Don't move."
With the goats fed, he returned to Gemma, who had her sock in her hand and a grimace on her face. "You tried to put your sock on?"
"Yes, but it hurt too much."
He put the bag of snow on the table, then eased her sock over her now swollen ankle. The sock, thankfully, was not too tight. "I'm going to get a bandage and wrap this bag so it stays in place."
"Okay."
He completed that task, then carried her to the waiting truck.
***
The cab was thankfully warm when he put Gemma on the passenger's seat. When he slid into the other side, Brandon said, "I'll try to make this ride as smooth as possible, but no guarantees."
Spraining her ankle had not been part of her plans. At least she'd have time for it to heal before she needed to drive again. Not that she couldn't. It was her left ankle that was injured, and she had an automatic car so she could still drive.
She probably wouldn't be able to drive as far each day as she liked, but she still had time. Time to get to Hollywood.
She shifted in her seat to look at him, wincing as she jarred her ankle. "I'm sorry, Brandon."
He glanced her way for a moment, then put his gaze back on the road. His jaw was tight. He clearly wasn't happy about the circumstances. "For what?"
She rolled her eyes. "For being a klutz. I'm sure you have better things to do than take me to urgent care."
He grimaced. She figured he wasn't going to say anything mean to her. She didn’t know him that well, but she knew that much. "Shit happens."
Gemma settled into the bumpy ride as best she could. She gritted her teeth, not wanting to be whiny. If she could have driven herself to the place, she would have.
Brandon's hand rested on the steering wheel as if he controlled the truck in snow every day. Jersey only had snow a few months a year.
He drove slowly, but with the snow, the roads were uneven. She studied him as he drove. She liked the capable vibe he was giving off. As if he could handle whatever came his way.
Well, except if that person wanted to love him, she figured. He could handle any external disaster, but none that involved his heart.
Finally, he pulled into the parking lot of what looked like a converted convenience store. The windows were the same, though someone had put blinds on them. The sign said, "Urgent Care".
"Let me come around," he said.
She had no plans on moving. Her foot ached, and she didn't want to put any weight on it. She did unbuckle her seatbelt, and Brandon whisked her out of the truck. She pushed the door closed before he carried her into the doc in a box.
He put her onto a chair. "Do you have an insurance card?"
She fumbled into her purse, then produced it. He walked to the counter. She watched his confident stride. If there was an emergency, he could take care of it.
His small swagger made him even sexier to her.
But she wasn't going to sleep with him again. She'd have to figure out a way to avoid him for the next two days.
If she gave her heart away, she'd never leave this small town.
And then she would never be a star.