The Suicide Princess (12 page)

“I think she's cheating on me,
Mark,” Jacob said.

“What? Say that again,”
Mark said with a stunned tone.

“My wife, I think she's cheating on me.”

“Stephanie? No way, man. Stephanie loves you,” Mark tried to reassure Jacob.

“I'm telling you, she is.”

“What makes you think that?”

“She's been acting so strange lately. She's just different, and she's so distant.”

Mark offered, “Maybe she's just going through something. My wife goes through these little funks all the time. Try to do something nice for her; something to get her mind off of things.”

“But there's more. She's been so protective of her phone lately. She's always either on it, or she hides it. She never just leaves it
laying around, and she'll never use it in front of me. She tells me she's texting her friend from work, but she just goes about it so weird.”

“Check your account online, and you can see who she's talking to,” said
Mark.

“Which brings up another strike
: she changed our account plan so our statements are separate now. She thinks I didn't notice, but she did that right around the same time this all started.”

“That is definitely strange,”
Mark agreed.

“But the worst part is
, she never came home from work last night. Then she strolled in this morning acting like everything was cool as can be.”

“What?” asked
Mark with disbelief. “Where did she say she was?”

“Her friend from work again.
But, Mark, I know it was bullshit. When she got home, there wasn't an ounce of her being sorry or her trying to explain. She just tried turning it around on me by starting a fight and making me out to be the bad guy.”

“What does her turning it around on you prove?”

“That she has something to hide. If she was telling the truth, she'd be sorry about it, but by turning it around on me and starting a different fight, she pulled the attention away from her not coming home. She was with another man.”

“So, what are you going to do about it?”
Mark asked.

“I'm going to confront her about everything and make her tell me the truth. Then I'll deal with it from there.”

“Look, I don't want to put my nose where it doesn't belong, but you need to get real.”

“Get?” Jacob asked.

Mark said, “You're going to confront her, and you honestly think she's just going to fess up to something? And then, even if she does, what are you planning on doing?”

“I'll walk away,” Jacob said. “I'm not staying in my marriage if she's cheating on me. I won't do it.”

“Because it's that simple, right? You can just walk away? How much do you have to lose by this?” Mark asked.

“Well, we don't have any kids, so I guess not a lot.”

Mark replied, “How about leaving your own house and getting stuck paying half the mortgage? How about paying her half your pension the day you retire? How about alimony?”

“How can she just make me leave the house? That's just as much mine as it is hers.”

“Have you ever heard of domestic violence? She calls the police and says you hit her, and that's it, you go.”

Offended by Mark’s comment, Jacob replied, “Stephanie would never do that.”

“Just like she'd never cheat on you right? I bet there was a time you would have said that, too.”

“So what do you suggest I do?” Jacob asked after a short pause.

“Get all your ducks in a row,” said Mark. “Start transferring money from your accounts into one in your mother or father's name. Build up your own nest egg. Then, understand that once you confront her you're going to have to leave, so have an apartment ready. The day you confront her, rent a truck and take everything you want out of the house before she gets home from work – your T.V., your furniture, everything. And last, before you say one word to her, have proof. Do whatever you have to do, but don't give her any room to lie her way out of it. Know who the other guy is, know where he works, know where he lives, find out if he's married, find out everything.”

“I will.
Thanks, Mark.”

“Jacob, I'm telling you, you better have tangible proof when you confront her. If it's just your suspicion, she's going to take you through the ringer. But if you know every last detail about her and this other guy, she stands to face a lot of embarrassment, and so does he. Who the hell wants everyone knowing they cheated on their spouse and got caught? Avoiding that embarrassment will be exactly what motivates her to want to end things clean, fairly, and quickly.”

“Thanks, Mark. Now, let me ask you a question: do you think she's cheating on me?”

“Based on what you told me?” Mark asked.

“Yes, based on what I've told you.”

“I hate to say it, buddy, but if you even have to ask, you probably already know the answer.”

While Jacob was off on his overnight flight, Stephanie found herself home alone and still fuming over her fight with Jacob. She initiated a message with Derrick,

“What'cha doing?”

“Not much, just thinking of you,”
Derrick replied.

“Up for doing something?”
Stephanie asked.

“I'm always up for something fun. What did you have in mind?”

“Anything involving your motorcycle,”
answered Stephanie.
“Don't laugh, but I've never been on a bike.”

“You're
really starting to make this hard for me to say no.”

“And just why would you want to say no, mister?”

Derrick replied,
“Where do you want me to meet you?”

“Your turn to come to me,”
she wrote.
“There's a little plaza down the street from my house, and I'll meet you there in one hour.”

Stephanie gave Derrick the dir
ections, and he simply replied,
“On my way.”

An hour later, Derrick roared into the parking lot, unleashing a loud rumble with each flick of his wrist on the throttle. Stephanie watched him pulling in, wearing his tattered jeans, boots, and tight-fitting white
T-shirt. His style, his attitude, and his tattooed arms all fit perfectly with his motorcycle, and Stephanie was loving every inch of him. She watched him park his bike, and as he was pulling his phone from his pocket to text her, she stepped out of her car and started walking to him.

Derrick was mid-way through his text when he looked up and saw Stephanie. She was wearing a very tight, form-fitting
T-shirt, very short denim shorts, and cork wedge heels. Her adorable outfit and her beautifully tanned skin made Derrick utter, “Girl, I just want to eat you up,” as she approached.

“Play your cards right, and you just might,” she flirted back. “But just be careful, I'm not as innocent as I look.”

Derrick leaned forward, inviting Stephanie to climb onto the back of his bike, and he said, “Let's roll, bad girl.”

Stephanie climbed on, and she wrapped her arms around Derrick's waist as he started the engine and brought the thunderous exhaust to life.

“Oh my God, that's loud,” Stephanie yelled into Derrick's ear.

“You just hang on,” Derrick said before suddenly driving through the parking lot and to the main road.

Derrick drove to the highway where he immediately drifted to the left lane and rapidly accelerated the bike to well over ninety miles per hour. Stephanie let out a thrilled scream as they blew past the slower cars. Stephanie yelled, “Where are we going?” but Derrick only replied by revving the motor and driving even faster.

Derrick drove about forty-five minutes west of Boston, and he exited the highway to a s
econdary country road. The back road rolled through gentle hills and curves, and the forest on either side of the pavement had grown so tall, a canopy of trees completely covered them. Derrick slowed his speed down, as this wasn't a thrill ride, this was something different. This was an experience to be taken in slowly and not rushed.

Stephanie's arms wrapped tighter around Derrick's waist, and her hands rubbed against his abdomen and chest as she pressed the side of her face against his back. Stephanie closed her eyes as she felt the breeze blowing over her face, and the mixed smell of Derrick's natural odor and the fresh forest air was the most intoxicating aroma she had ever sensed.

As the afternoon was wearing on, the sky began to darken from the clouds rolling in. The air became heavy with the smell of rain as the first sprinkle appeared. Derrick pulled off to the side of the road as the rain grew steadier.

As Derrick turned off the engine, Stephanie asked, “Why are you stopping? It's raining.”

“The road's going to be slick. I'm cool with risking it by myself, but not with you.”

“But Derrick, we're in the middle of the woods, and it's pouring!”

Derrick got off the motorcycle, and he lifted Stephanie to help her down. “It's okay,” he replied. “Follow me.”

Derrick took Stephanie by the hand and he ran, pulling her behind him. He found a large tree which was filled with branches and leaves, and he led Stephanie under it.

“It's not the best, but it'll do. It won't rain long,” Derrick said.

“It won't be long?” Stephanie asked. “Then I don't want to waste it.”

Her long brown hair was dripping, with rain falling down her face to her lips. Derrick's hand grabbed the back of her neck, and pulled her in to kiss her deeply. Derrick stepped forward into Stephanie, causing her to step back until she was pressed against the tree. Derrick's drenched shirt was clinging to his body, and it stuck to him as Stephanie began pulling it off. Derrick pulled Stephanie in close as he was kissing her, and each press of his lips against hers felt like her very first kiss all over again.

Derrick's hands began unbuttoning Stephanie's tiny shorts, and once undone, she couldn't get them off fast enough. As the rain fell on them, Derrick lifted Stephanie off of the ground. She wrapped her legs around him, and with her back pressed against the tree, he made passionate love to her. Stephanie was overcome with emotion since this was so different from her other experiences with Derrick. This was the kind of powerful, connecting, and loving sex Stephanie had always dreamed of having.
I love this man,
she thought to herself but didn't dare have the courage to say out loud.

As the passing rain began to let up, Derrick stopped making love to Stephanie. He kissed her gently and she asked, “You didn't cum. Do you want me to finish you another way?”

Derrick kissed Stephanie and replied, “You didn't either.”

“This time, it wasn't about cumming for me,” Stephanie replied.

Derrick softly said, “It wasn't for me either.”

Derrick and Stephanie dressed themselves and walked back to Derrick's motorcycle, holding hands and laughing. The ride home was bone-chilling as the cool night air rushed against their damp bodies. Stephanie pulled herself in close to Derrick to keep warm, but even the cold chill couldn't dampen her emotions. After spending years with Jacob, building a life with him, and thinking she knew what love was, Stephanie felt as though she had finally found what love was supposed to feel like.

Knowing Jacob was gone for the night, Stephanie had Derrick drive to her house. Stephanie invited Derrick in to dry his clothes, and he graciously accepted the offer.

“You're sure your husband isn't coming home?” Derrick asked.

“I'm sure.”

“One hundred percent sure?”
He asked again.

“I promise. He's an airline pilot, and he's on an overnight flight, so it's not like he can just leave work early and come home.” explained Stephanie. “What's the matter, is my tough guy suddenly afraid?”

“Shut up, brat,” Derrick joked back.

“Besides,” continued Stephanie, “even if he did show up, I know you could easily kick his ass.”

“That's one lucky guy you have there,” Derrick said in jest.

Stephanie put Derrick's clothes in the drier, and he stood in her kitchen wearing only his underwear as Stephanie made coffee. “I feel like an idiot standing here in my underwear, you know!”

“Good, jerk! Now you know how I felt when
you
made me strip in your kitchen.” Stephanie wrapped her arms around Derrick and continued, “But you can punish me any time you want. You know I'll do anything for you, right?”

“I do. There is one thing, though, one thing I don't think you'll ever do.”

“Ask me. The worst I can say is no,” Stephanie said as she turned to finish making coffee.

“It's a little awkward to bring up,” said Derrick.

“If it's awkward for you, it's got to be bad – oh God, if you even tell me you want to piss on me, I'll kick your ass!” Stephanie said laughingly.

“I want you....” Derrick said without finishing. “I want you....”

“Come on, goofball, spit it out. You want me to what?”

“Nothing,” Derrick said. “There's nothing after it. I just want you.”

Stephanie nearly dropped the coffee mug from her hand. Without turning to look at Derrick, she asked, “What are you asking me, Derrick?”

“
I want a relationship with you -- a real relationship, but it's never going to work like this. I'm telling you that I'm willing to make the jump, but only if you're in it with me.” There was a long pause with no response from Stephanie when Derrick said, “I want you to leave your husband.”

***

The following day at lunch, Karen shouted “What!?!” when Stephanie told her what Derrick said. “Wait, wait, wait…back up. He asked you to leave Jacob?”

“He actually told me he was falling for me, and he is starting to think he's going to get hurt. Derrick said he's afraid of falling in love with me only to have me leave him and go back to Jacob.”

“What did you say? Did you tell him he was crazy?” Karen asked.

“Why would I tell him he's crazy?” Stephanie asked.

“Because, you're not really going to leave Jacob, are you?”

Stephanie said, “I think I am, Karen. I really think I belong with Derrick.”

“Are you kidding me right now?” Karen asked, almost angry by the thought of Stephanie leaving her husband.

“What the hell is your problem?” Stephanie lashed out.

“I just don't see why he needs to rush you into leaving Jacob.”

“Derrick isn't rushing me into an
ything. He told me how he feels, and I feel the exact same way.”

Karen asked,
“But why does he want you to leave your husband all of a sudden? You barely even know this guy, Stephanie! Have you lost your mind?”

“Because he said he's been hurt bad in the past, he's afraid, and no, I haven’t lost my mind,”
explained Stephanie.

“Afraid? I think he's full of shit,” Karen said without reason.

“Karen, what the fuck? This is why I hate talking to you about this -- you're so wishy-washy. One day you think he's bad for me, then you think he's good, then I need to run from him, then you want me to go back to him, and now he's a liar? You don't even know him.”

“I know him better than you think,” Karen said.

“And what's that supposed to mean?” Stephanie asked.

“I know his kind. I'm telling you St
ephanie, this guy's trouble!” said Karen as she got up, walked away from the table and stormed out of the restaurant.

Stephanie, completely confused
and irritated by the conversation, had no idea what had just happened. It was at the same exact table where Karen had recently told Stephanie to go back to Derrick and see where this could lead. It was there that Karen suggested perhaps Derrick was the right person for her. Now, however, Karen had completely changed, and Stephanie was at a total loss for any understanding of why.

***

Stephanie arrived home, and Jacob was already there. She walked through the house without even acknowledging him, and Jacob returned in kind. Stephanie saw an empty pizza box on the counter, and since she was hungry, she asked, “Did you save me any?”

Jacob coldly answered, “Why would I?” without even turning from the television.

“Whatever, asshole.”

“Yeah, Stephanie, I'm the asshole.”

Stephanie said, “Don't even talk to me.” A moment later she continued, “When's your next overnight?”

Jacob replied, “Why so you can go fuck your boyfriend again?” without even thinking of his conversation with Mark. As soon as the words rolled from his tongue, Jacob cringed with regret.

“No, so I can have Karen over for a girls' night,” Stephanie said. “You disgust me.”

Jacob struggled not to argue back. He knew Stephanie was lying, and he wanted to challenge her on her lie, but he knew his friend was right. Jacob knew he didn't have the ammunition to win this war, and accordingly, he backed down.

“I'm sorry,” Jacob said with enormous restraint. “That was wrong of me to accuse you of something like that. You've never done anything to come even close to deserving this.” Jacob forced himself to continue, “I'll be gone on Tuesday night next week.”

Stephanie retrieved a frozen dinner from the freezer and counted down the minutes on the microwave until her meal was ready. She couldn't even stand to be in the same room as Jacob anymore, but she couldn't understand why. Stephanie knew she was the one who was betraying her husband, she knew she was the one who was violating her marriage, and she knew Jacob had never done anything even close to the sort; however, she couldn't get beyond her feeling that she couldn't stomach to be around him. The simple fact was every minute Stephanie was around Jacob, she wasn't with Derrick, and she blamed Jacob for standing in her way. As Stephanie's resentment towards Jacob grew, his own confusion of the situation multiplied, and Jacob had no idea what he had done wrong.