The Nature of Cruelty (22 page)

“What is this thing you’re doing with me?” I ask curiously.

“Well, right now it involves getting you out of this dress and letting me put my mouth on you again,” he whispers in my ear, his breath causing tingles to run down my neck.

“And how is that coming along?” My voice quivers.

He pulls back to study me, slanting his eyes. “Hard to tell. I’d say I have a fifty-fifty chance of discovering whether or not you’re wearing the lingerie I bought you before the night is through.”

His words make my heart speed up. “Okay, I’ll save you the bother and tell you that yes, I’m wearing them,” I whisper.

A slow smile spreads across his pretty mouth. He pulls me close and lets out a satisfied sigh, holding me as tightly as he can. “I’m really fucking happy to hear that,” he breathes.

The song comes to a close, and somebody dims the lights as several members of the waiting staff begin wheeling out a huge four-tiered birthday cake. The recognisable notes of “Happy Birthday to You” are sung as Alan gives the room a modest smile and a bow and prepares to blow out the candle shaped into the number 50.

Robert tugs me away from the dance floor and farther into the dark room. His hand cups my cheek as he ducks down to plant a quick, intensified kiss on my lips. His tongue slips forcefully into my mouth, and his hands feel like they’re everywhere all at once. Then everyone’s shouting “hip hip hurray,” and the lights are coming back on. He walks away from me, going to clap his dad around the shoulders and tell him happy birthday.

I make my way back to the table and sit down, still stunned by the level of emotion and need in the way he kissed me. I want to have another glass of champagne to settle my nerves, but I should really wait until we get to Alistair’s. The chair beside mine scrapes back, and I turn to find Sasha plonking herself down into it.

She knocks back half a glass and then settles her gaze on me. She seems contemplative.

“So,” she begins casually, “what were you doing dancing with Rob?”

I purse my lips and pick up a little fancy-looking pastry just to have something to do. “He asked me to.”

“Mm-hmm. You two looked…very cosy. Like you were in a couple or something.” She arches her brow at me questioningly.

I sputter a laugh and shake my head at her. “That’s ridiculous, Sash.”

God, why the hell am I lying to her? I’m just so bloody embarrassed about liking Robert. Admitting it to Sasha would be on a par to admitting I listen to One Direction in secret or something.

She frowns now when she looks at me, and her eyes seem sad. “I know Rob has his charms, Lana. The problem is he knows it, and he knows how to use them.” She pauses and lets out an agonised sigh. “Fuck,” she mutters. “I love that boy, he’s my brother, but I’ve seen him reduce cold hard bitches to broken women. You’re not cold and you’re not hard, and if he ever tried to break you, I don’t think I could forgive him, because I love you just as much as I love him. I’m not blind. I’ve noticed you warming up to him this past week or so. What’s even scarier is that Robert looks at you like he wants to kiss your face off, like,
all
the time. Please tell me I’m imagining it.”

I pull off a piece of the pastry and stick it in my mouth. “Okay, you’re not imagining it,” I answer, hardly a whisper.

“Say again?” Sasha asks, sitting up straighter now.

“You’re not imagining it,” I tell her louder.

“Ah, shit.” She slumps back down in her seat.

“Look, nothing’s really happened. We’ve just had a few…moments.”

“Elaborate.”

“He kissed me.”

“How very chaste of him. Whatever happened to the two of you being mortal enemies?”

All I can do is shrug. She takes the rest of the pastry out of my hand and shoves it in her mouth.

“What did you do that for?”

“You were irritating me fiddling with it.”

“Okay.”

“So, go on. What else did he do?”

I blush. “Ugh, Sasha, don’t make me go into details.”

Her eyes get wider. “You haven’t had sex with him, have you?”

“No!” I exclaim. “You know I’m clueless when it comes to that. I wouldn’t know where to begin.”

She rolls her eyes. “It’s not rocket science.”

I snort. “It might as well be.”

She turns to me now and tucks a strand of hair behind my ear, one hand leaning against the back of my chair. “I’m not trying to lecture you. I just wanted this to be a fun summer break for you, and although you might think being with Robert will be a fun little distraction, I can tell you for a fact that it won’t be. It’ll be a fun distraction followed by some big drama followed by heartbreak. Shit, I thought you were smarter than this, kid.”

I’m about to reply to her when Robert shows up at the table and takes the seat beside her.

His eyes move from me to his sister. “Why do you both look like someone just pissed in your cornflakes?”

“Maybe because you did,” says Sasha, peering at him with a narrowed gaze.

“I’ll have you know I’m not in the habit of pissing in cornflakes. Nasty business, that.”

“Lana told me what’s been going on,” she says, ignoring his joke.

His expression sobers, and he gets defensive. “And that’s a bad thing because…”

“Come on, Rob. Don’t play dumb. You’re not good enough for her.”

“Sasha,” I say softly, touching her arm.

“No, Lana, I’m right. I’m not saying you’re better than him, I’m just saying that he’s still sleeping around, and that’s certainly not good enough for you.”

“Fuck you. I haven’t been with anyone in weeks,” Robert spits, his jaw tight.

“Oh, so you’ve turned over a new leaf?”

“Maybe I have.”

“And maybe you haven’t.”

“And maybe there was never a leaf to turn over.”

“Now you’re not even making any sense.”

Robert stands up from the table. “Yes, I am. I slept around because I was trying to fill a hole, a hole that was there because I couldn’t have what I really wanted, and what I’ve always wanted was
her
.” He throws his hand in my direction. “But I could never have her because you were constantly standing by like her fucking bodyguard.” He hisses these last words and then storms away from the table.

Sasha and I are left sitting there, shocked and speechless.

Twelve

M
y body trembles as Robert’s last words replay in my head. He’s always wanted me. Like,
always
always?

“I think I better go talk to my brother,” says Sasha, breaking my thoughts and standing up. I watch her leave through the same door as Robert. A server sets a slice of birthday cake down in front of me, but my stomach is in too many knots right now for me to even take a bite.

“Hey, Lana, where did Sasha rush off to?” Alistair asks, sitting down by me.

“She and Robert are having a talk,” I answer.

“I see,” he says, his dark eyes studying me. “Well, are you going to eat that?” He gestures to the cake.

“Oh, no, go ahead.”

He slides the plate in front of him and digs in. I twiddle my thumbs and keep glancing back and forth at the door through which Robert and Sasha could very well be having a massive argument. I can’t hear any shouting, which is always a good sign. Then again, I probably wouldn’t be able to hear them over the band anyway.

God, I’m dying to know what they’re saying to each other.

Alistair must notice my worried expression, because he puts his hand on my arm and says, “Twins can be weird sometimes. Best leave it to the two of them to sort whatever it is out between themselves.”

“Yeah,” I breathe. “I’m going to the bar to get an orange juice. Do you want anything?”

“Nah, I’m good.”

I get up and walk across the room to the bar. I end up asking for a white wine instead of an orange juice. Not ideal, but I need it.

On my way back, I find myself passing by Kara and that blonde girl from the beach. Michelle, I think.

I give them both a small smile and say, “Hi,” before continuing on my way.

A hand reaches out to stop me. It’s Kara. “Have you seen Robert?” she asks while simultaneously examining my dress. Perhaps it has a stain.

“He and Sasha are out in the lobby,” I tell her, making an effort to move on.

“Oh. Will you tell him I wanted a word?” There’s a hint of desperation behind the calm façade she’s putting up. I wonder what that’s about. Maybe I was right and she really does still have feelings for him.

“Sure.”

“Thanks,” she says, and takes a sip from her drink.

“I’ll see you later, then. You both look very pretty tonight.” I nod to Michelle and then back to Kara before walking away. They seem surprised by my compliment.

“Thanks again,” Kara calls after me, her voice slightly clipped now.

When I get back, Alistair has already finished his slice of cake and is sitting at another table, laughing with a group of young men and women. I nurse my wine and wait for Sasha and Robert to return. I’ve almost fallen asleep by the time Sasha comes back into the ballroom half an hour later.

My eyes travel over to her when she sits down. She’s actually smiling – kind of.

“Well, what happened?” I ask her.

“We talked. Robert explained a lot of stuff and, well, I’ve decided to give you both my blessing.”

I crinkle up my nose and look at her cynically. “We’re not getting married, Sash.”

“Oh, shush, you know what I mean.” She grabs a new glass of champagne from a server who passes by.

“Where’s Robert?”

“I’m right here,” his voice answers softly from behind as he scoops me up into his arms and squeezes me tight. He’s positively beaming, wearing the biggest smile I’ve ever seen.

“Let me go, you crazy person,” I say, laughing slightly. “Why are you so happy?” This isn’t exactly what I was expecting. To be honest, I thought they’d end up having the biggest fight ever and ruining their dad’s party.

His fingers travel over my cheeks as he bites down on his lower lip. His eyes are alight with mischief, like he knows a secret.

Finally, he drops his arms and lets me sit back down in my seat. He’s still grinning like a lunatic.

“Say something, will you? You’re freaking me out.”

A chuckle spurts from his lips as he asks, “What?”

“What are you smiling about?”

“Nothing. I just think you’re wonderful.”

“Hmm, why don’t I believe you?”

“You should believe me, because it’s true.”

I shake my head and look to Sasha for a minute to see if she’ll shed any light on the matter. She gets slightly tense. “He’s just happy that we discussed things and now everything’s out in the open.”

“All right,” I say suspiciously, turning back to Robert. “I bumped into Kara. She said she wants a word with you.”

His smile dies as he rubs his hand across his mouth. “Yeah, well, she can go on wanting.”

“I told you she still had feelings for you. She probably wants to ask you about getting back together.”

Sasha raises an eyebrow at this.

“Like I said, she can go on wanting.” He reaches forward and takes my hand into his, pulling his chair right up to mine so our thighs brush against each other. “Didn’t you hear a word I said earlier?” he asks. “It’s you I want, Lana. It always has been.”

He kisses me softly on the cheek as I pull away self-consciously. When I glance in Sasha’s direction, she looks completely out of her comfort zone. I guess me and Robert being a thing is going to take some getting used to for her. What am I saying? It’s going to take some getting used to for me, too.

“I need to use the bathroom,” I say, rising swiftly from my seat to escape the awkwardness that Robert seems to be oblivious to.

“I’ll go with you,” he says, rising as well, but I push him back down.

“No, I’ll only be a minute. You stay and have a drink.”

His eyes look back and forth between mine, trying to figure out what’s wrong with me. A moment later he relents and allows me to pass. In the bathroom, I end up standing by the sink holding my hands under the cold tap, trying to clear my head and make sense of everything. It feels surreal to think that Sasha knows about us now. It feels surreal to think that I’m falling for my ex-bully.

Yes, falling for.

It’s almost impossible not to fall in love with Robert even when he’s acting like the devil incarnate, never mind when he’s being all tender and affectionate. A lesson for life: Beauty often causes people to overlook deeper flaws.

I need to find out what those two spoke about, because they were gone for quite a while and Robert’s acting…unusual.

“You’re going to catch your death if you keep your hands under there much longer,” says the bathroom attendant, noticing how I’m frozen in thought.

I give her a weak nod and abruptly turn off the tap, grabbing some paper towels to dry my hands. When I walk out of the ladies, Robert is leaning against the far wall, waiting for me. He reaches out and gathers me to his chest, breathing in deeply. He keeps staring at me, not saying anything, but looking like he just won the lottery.

“Stop being weird, Rob,” I tell him quietly.

“I’m not being weird. I’m just happy,” he says, leaning down to nuzzle my neck.

“Mmm,” I say with a sigh, closing my eyes for a moment and wishing we weren’t in the middle of a hotel full of people.

“Look at you, so pretty when you’re turned on,” he says huskily.

“I…” I falter as his hands massage my hips.

“Come on, everybody’s headed to Alistair’s now.”

At this he pulls me along with him and out to the front of the building, where there are several limos waiting. The first one pulls away from the entrance just as Robert opens the door to the second and ushers me inside.

“Just my luck,” he mutters when he notices Kara’s in this one, alongside Gary and Michelle. Sasha’s here, too, but I don’t recognise a single other face inside the packed vehicle. Well, except for the bald-headed Jimmy, who’s sitting up close to Sasha with his arm stretched a couple of inches behind her shoulders. She looks like she’s going to murder him if he tries laying a hand on her. It reminds me that I still need to somehow get her to come out to me, to everyone, really, because continuing with such a huge secret is no way to live, and I can’t let my best friend go on hurting herself like that.