32
My heart beats in time with my footsteps, each booming with the intensity of thunder. At least, that’s how it feels to me. Because the moment I’m out in the open, two things happen. First, the Nephilim chanting stops as though someone has taken the needle off a record. I feel thousands of eyes upon me, though I cannot see them. The Nephilim and hunters are concealed behind a wall of flame and radiating heat that I cannot feel, but can see shimmering up toward the ceiling hundreds of feet above.
Second, Behemoth holds its breath. I don’t see it happen, but the breeze has died down and the pressure of the place has changed. It’s amazing that a single creature could have that much influence on its environment. It’s also terrifying.
Everything about this is terrifying. I’m no longer Ull. I’m not facing my enemies with the confidence of a warrior who would fight to the death. I’m the nerdy bookworm and despite having gained some skills, abilities, and admittedly, some toughening up, my idea of a good fight is still a rousing game of Risk or Electronic Battleship.
But I’m pretending to be Ull, so I keep my chin up, my eyes set forward and my stride confident. I hide my fear and press onward, for Luca.
When I reach the center of the chamber, still a few hundred feet from the fire, the ground shakes. My presence on this side of the flame has spurred Behemoth into action, as I feared, and hoped, it would.
I don’t look back.
I don’t quicken my pace.
For those looking at my face, it will appear as though I am as unconcerned by Behemoth’s approach as I would be by an ant’s.
A second quake rattles the cavern, this one more intense, but still not on top of me. My body flickers from the orange flames. If I could feel heat, I suspect I would be quite warm now.
Boom
.
Behemoth takes another giant step. It’s right behind me now. Close enough.
Without moving my hands or changing my facial expression, I focus on the air at the top of the cavern. I turn my focus smaller and smaller, separating one gas from another until I’ve found what I’m looking for: oxygen.
I can hear Behemoth’s hairy tendrils snaking toward me. It won’t be long before they strike out, lash around me and drag me back to the giant jaws sporting teeth the size of sailboat sails. If that were to happen, I’m not sure I could set myself free, even with all of my abilities.
When I’m sure my fear is about to reveal itself on my face, I bring the cloud of oxygen down to the fire. The reaction is instantaneous. The flames burst white hot, filling the cavern with a sudden burst of light akin to a giant sized camera flash bulb. I close my eyes at the same moment, sparing myself from the majority of the light’s power.
Behemoth roars behind me. The sound is so loud that it takes all my strength to not put my hands to my ears.
As the flames shrink back to normal size, I realize that I could do the chicken dance all the way up to the flame wall and no one would notice. The bright light and intense sound have had an effect on the Nephilim too. Several rub their eyes. Some rub their ears. But not one of them is watching me now.
I don’t waver. Just because everyone I can see isn’t paying attention, doesn’t mean others aren’t still watching. I continue toward the fire, my pace as even as it was when I first entered the chamber.
The first hunters and Nephilim to regain their sight see me as I approach the flames. A murmur rises up. They no doubt expected me to arrive on their side of the fire wall and avoid Behemoth altogether. I can’t hear what’s being said, but they’re probably wondering if I’ve gone mad.
So I prepare to continue the show. But before I use my ability to split the wall of fire in two and walk through, I have a revelation. Not only can I not feel cold, but it has no effect on my body. I don’t get frostbite or hypothermia. No matter how cold things get, or how strong the wind blows, I am immune to the cold. And I think the same holds true for heat. So instead of parting the fire before me, I step right in.
A grin spreads onto my face as the orange flames lick painlessly around me. But I notice my clothing and belongings catch fire and I quickly create a protective vortex of wind around my body. Ull might not mind stepping out of the fire buck naked, but I don’t think I could hide my embarrassment.
Once free of the flames, I realize I’m still grinning. But Ull would do the same, so I keep the smile and meet the eyes of every hunter and Nephilim waiting for me. I see many I recognize from experience and by their garb and headdresses. Thor, son of Odin, Norse god of thunder and Kainda’s master, wielding his hammer and wearing a great horned helmet. The Egyptian Horus, god of vengeance, wearing a helmet shaped like a falcon and carrying a two pronged spear. Next comes Hades, brother of Zeus, whom I identify by the pet he holds by a chain: Cerberus, a three headed creature with the body of a giant red-furred wolf, its three heads resembling feeders—black orb eyes and triangle teeth. It’s a horrid thing and I fight not to show my revulsion.
When the first Nephilim drops to one knee and bows, this becomes easier, in part because they can’t see me, but also because my show has worked and it’s quite possible that
they
fear
me
. They weren’t entirely sure what would happen when I bonded with the body of Nephil, and they most likely assume I’ve taken on some supernatural abilities.
The sea of Nephilim and hunters separates, offering me a path that stretches like a freeway through their ranks for four hundred feet. I see more familiar Nephilim including the obese Gaia, whose beaked face and rolls of feather covered fat make my stomach twist with disgust, not only from her grotesque appearance, but also at the knowledge that the feeders I ate in the pit emerged from her girth. As did the duplicate of my mother.
It occurs to me that Gaia knows the truth about me. That I needed to be broken once again. How many others know? Kainda for sure. Ninnis trusted her with the knowledge, which means there is a bond of father and daughter between them that neither would ever admit. I look at Gaia and see a glimmer of fear in her eyes. But she’s not afraid of Ull, I realize. She’s afraid of the truth being revealed. Of me not pulling off this monumental bluff. If I’m not Ull, it means not only Ninnis failed, but so did Gaia, as the breeder overseeing my rebreaking. The punishment for failure would no doubt be severe. The punishment for this deception? Well, that might very well mean a trip through the giant gates I now see before me.
The gates stand fifty feet tall and half as wide. They’re black, and metal, I think. I expected ornate decorations, perhaps an inscription or some kind of gilding, but the two doors are simply as black as night. In fact, the bright firelight doesn’t show on the doors. It’s like they’re actually
absorbing
the light.
But the strange doors don’t hold my attention for long. Enki stands before me, dressed in his black leathers. And Ninnis stands by his side, though his near six foot height takes him only up to a level slightly below the giant’s knee. He stares at me with an intensity that matches the wall of fire, probably wondering if I will play his game.
When I see Luca off to the side, and Kainda next to him, there is no doubt that I will play my part to the very end. Behind them stands a pair of young hunters, one male, one female, who I assume are Preeg and Pyke. I glance around them, finding no sign of Doug.
As I approach, Enki drops to one knee and bows. Ninnis, Kainda and the others follow suit. When their eyes are downcast, I turn my eyes to Luca. He looks frightened, but manages to show a slight grin when I wink at him. The wink tells him that not only am I here, but I’m also me. Not Ull. But if he’s seen any of my recent experiences, he might already know that.
The sound of standing bodies brings my eyes forward again, and then up. Enki looks down at me with a toothy grin that looks more savage than happy.
“I was not sure you would come after so long,” the giant says, his voice like the roar of an eighteen wheeler.
“The effect of bonding with the body of Nephil was…profound,” I say, fighting the quiver in my voice. “It took some time to adjust.”
“I should say so,” Enki says. “But your return has fortuitous timing. Human technology is progressing faster than ever and the time to strike, and undo their advantage, is upon us.”
Something about the things he is saying confuses me, so I offer a cocky laugh and ask, “How far could they have advanced in two years that
we
would have anything to fear from
them
?”
Enki’s grin spreads as he lets out a deep chuckle. Even Ninnis is smiling. My anger rises. I
hate
being out of the loop, especially when people—even Nephilim—laugh at me.
“How long has it been?” I ask.
The laughing continues and starts to spread beyond our small group. I put my hand on Whipsnap, add a snarl to my voice and ask again. “How. Long.”
Laughter fades. Smiles falter. Ull is angry.
“In surface years?” Enki asks.
“Yes,” I say.
“Twenty years.”
33
I nearly throw up on Enki’s oversized feet. The news hits me hard and deep. I feel like I’m facing the feeder duplicate of my mother all over again—a perversion of reality. How could twenty surface years have passed? It’s just not possible. Sure, I’ve got some facial hair growing, but I have a hairy father and a fifteen year old needing to shave is actually quite common. But what felt like two years to me was actually
twenty
?
The ramifications of this news slam into my thoughts like tidal waves.
My parents are in their sixties. Maybe dead. They’ve long since given up any hope of finding me alive and might have other kids. They’ve moved on. Forgotten me.
Justin isn’t a kid any more. He might be married. He might have kids of his own. A family.
Dr. Clark will have given up on me as well. He’s an old man by now. In his sixties if he’s still alive. Maybe remarried. Twenty years without a wife is a long time.
My heart aches when I think of Mira. The girl that I held so close to my heart for so long is no longer a girl. She’s a woman. And like Justin, she might have a family. A husband. The thought fills me with jealousy and anger.
“You seem surprised,” Ninnis says, returning my thoughts to the awful here and now.
“I’m thirty-three years old?” I say.
“According to the outside world, yes. Give or take a few years,” Ninnis says. “It’s not an exact science.” He looks me over. “You must have been deep. Time slows the deeper you go. You don’t look much older than you did when we last saw you.”
I feel my legs growing weak. My head spins. Everything has changed. Everything I hoped to get back has been taken from me. While I didn’t have my family, friends or life before, the knowledge that geography was the only thing that separated us comforted me. Crossing the ocean, or catching a plane flight from McMurdo, wasn’t an impossibility. But the distance between me and everything I knew before is now separated by an insurmountable divide—time.
I glance at Luca and see concern in his eyes. My resolve is wavering and it shows on my face. Looking into his eyes reminds me that I’m not here for me. I’m here for him. I erase the surprise from my face and straighten my back. “Well then, we shouldn’t waste any more time.”
Ninnis squints at me, never taking his eyes away from mine. “Agreed.”
Enki steps to the side, revealing a thirty foot circle carved into the stone floor in front of the giant gates. Within the circle are an array of symbols, some of them familiar, some of them new, but all fill me with a sense of dread. I’m facing an ancient evil. Something still so far beyond my understanding. But I sense these symbols hold power, and when I see the smaller circle dead center in the middle of the larger, I know that is where I am meant to stand.
“The ceremony requires a sacrifice of human blood,” Ninnis says.
I worry that he will choose to use Luca, but his next words erase that fear.
“To expedite things, we took care of that before you arrived.” Ninnis reaches behind his back, pulls something from a satchel and tosses it towards me.
As the object spins through the air, I catch glimpses of red hair and a face. It’s a head. He’s just thrown a human head at me. As the head lands and rolls to a stop at my feet, I think,
don’t react, don’t react, don’t react
! And that proves incredibly hard to do when I see the blank eyes of Doug staring up at me from my feet. I swallow hard and ask, “He was a hunter?”
“A volunteer,” Ninnis says.
When I look up at him, I see anger in his eyes. Ninnis knew I sent Doug to take Luca. And Doug clearly failed in the attempt.
“He willingly died for you,” Ninnis adds, turning the knife.
“As you all would,” I say to Ninnis.
I’m as surprised by the statement as Ninnis is, but he has no choice but to nod and agree.
“Little Ull,” Enki says with a chuckle. “You have not changed.”
I look up at the giant, at the gold band around his forehead that hides the Nephilim’s weak spot. I could knock the crown from his head and impale him with Whipsnap before he even knew what was happening. I blink the thought from my mind. Either my proximity to the gates, or maybe all these Nephilim, are triggering my dark imagination, a problem that has not plagued me since the personalities of Ull and Nephil were locked away inside my mind. “I am stronger,” I say.
“Of that, I have no doubt,” Enki said. “There is a resolve in your eyes that was not there before.”
I nod. “I am ready.”
Enki sweeps his huge hand out toward the circle. “Take your place at the center. The ceremony will be a rebirth for you, violent and painful. But it will also be brief.”
I head into the circle, feeling sick to my stomach as I step past the outer ring of symbols. I stop in the center and turn around.
“When we next speak, you will be Nephil, Lord of the Nephilim and commander of all that you see!” Enki opens his arms out to either side. I think that if I curled up in a ball my whole body could fit inside his bicep. “The army of Nephil will rise again.”
I scan the thousands of hunters and Nephilim standing around me. The heroes of old. The men of renown. I can’t imagine a modern army that could stand against such a force. How the ancient humans forced the Nephilim underground, I have no idea. But there is no time for such pondering. I search the sea of hunters to my right, looking for a familiar face. Finding none, I turn to the left, putting on a phony smile as I do. I see Luca there. Kainda is by his side. Preeg and Pyke maintain their vigil behind them. But I don’t see what I’m—
There! In the shadows of the far wall behind Preeg and Pyke. A subtle shift in the darkness. Emilie is there. Waiting to strike. One girl against an army.
But there is another I’m searching for. My only real hope of escaping this situation with my life and my soul intact. I don’t see him with my eyes so I reach out to him with my mind.
Xin,
I think.
Can you hear me
?
Are you near, brother
?
I need you, Xin.
Xin
!
My silence has stretched on too long. It has become awkward. They are waiting for a response from me.
So I give them one.
I turn my head to the ceiling and let out a howl. It’s only a moment before the others join in. Thousands of human and Nephilim heads turn toward the ceiling and roar. The ground shakes beneath my feet. When Behemoth—who is also a Nephilim—joins in, bits and pieces of the ceiling shake loose and fall.
When the mass howl completes, I feel more afraid than ever. When Ull was a part of me, the howl filled me with energy and confidence. Now, I feel drained by it. But I stand my ground in the circle, and wait for what comes next.
Six Nephilim step forward. I recognize each one of them from history books and carvings all around the underworld. Enki. His brother, Enlil. The sons of Nephil. Odin. Osiris. Zeus. The last is a new face to me, but I think he’s Marduk, king of the early Mesopotamian gods. These are the ancient kings of this world, who once ruled over humanity. They radiate power and sinister intentions. They stand around the circle, chanting in Sumerian.
Enki stretches out his arms. The others follow suit. Their finger tips touch, forming a circle of Nephilim flesh around me. He speaks in Sumerian and Thor steps out of the crowd wielding his hammer and carrying a large satchel. He stops behind Enki and removes a nail so large that it looks more like a thick sword. He places the nail against the back of Enki’s six fingered hand. And with a single solid whack from Mjöllnir, sends the nail through.
Enki twitches from the impact, but shows no pain. Instead, his face reflects delight. His smile grows wider still when Thor puts a giant nail through his other hand and then moves on to Enlil. One by one, Thor slams the nails through the hands of the ancient kings. With the nails still in their flesh, the wounds cannot heal and their dark purple blood drains onto the floor. The carved out ring fills with the blood of the six warriors. It rolls from the outer circle and into the array of symbols.
My eyes widen as I see the rivers of blood snake across the floor. I follow the path forward and realize that it will soon fill the circle around me and drain into the slightly depressed area in which I stand. I will soon be standing in a pool of their blood, which when diluted can heal a human, but at full strength can kill. I’m either meant to die in their blood and be reborn with the spirit of Nephil, or it’s meant to heal me from the severe injury caused by the bonding. Neither option is appealing.
As I watch the blood slither toward me, I nearly miss the whisper in my ear.
Solomon
.
Not in my ear. In my head.
Solomon.
Xin?
Yes.
Can you help me
?
You reached out to me
, he says.
How
?
I don’t know.
Then answer this, why did you call me ‘brother’?