I start to stutter because I am so caught off guard, “I-I like us as friends,
Zac.”
“Of course,” he rolls his eyes. “I’m always the friend
, never the boyfriend.”
“
Zac, I’m sorry-.”
“You kissed
Lance.”
“I didn’t kiss
Lance!” I exclaim. “He kissed me and trapped me on his bed! He forced me, which is exactly like what you are doing to me now.”
Zac
’s eyes fill with sorrow, “I’m not forcing you to do anything, Jenna.”
“Listen,
Zac.” I plead. “Please don’t complicate this. Everything is so messed up right now. I need a friend who is there for me. Please be that friend.”
He stares at me for a little before nodding slowly, “Okay. You’re right, I’m sorry. That was so stupid of me.”
“Thank you,” I wrap my arms around his waist to hug him. “I have to go, Hayden is…” I cut myself off.
Zac
smiles lightly, “I get it. Go.”
I smile and open the door. He grabs my wrist again, “Please don’t tell him what I did.
Hayden would kill me.”
I nod and walk into the hall.
Just another number to add to my list of things that have happened today. Another secret.
Chapter 21:
More and More Drama
“Sorry about this morning,” Hayden says as he entwines our fingers.
“Don’t be sorry! It was hilarious,” I laugh, recalling how
Hayden’s mom had barged into the room at 6:30 this morning, blasting some upbeat hip-hop music. She sang along with the lyrics, screaming at the top of her lungs and jumping around the room.
“It was embarrassing,”
Hayden whines. “I swear, I don’t know why she gets the urge to do stuff like this sometimes.”
I laugh again and squeeze his hand, “Sorry, baby
Hayden.”
Hayden
turns his head to look at me and I feel my stomach do a back flip as I get lost in his emerald eyes. He smirks a little and then breaks the eye contact.
“Remember how you said that you didn’t know if Jessica was mad at you or not last night?” he asks me.
“Yeah, why?”
He points
over to the freshmen lockers with his free hand, “Here’s your chance to find out.”
I watch as Jessica
takes out her books. My stomach does another back flip and for the first time, I am nervous to talk to my best friend.
Hayden
can sense my hesitation, “Don’t be scared, just talk to her.”
I nod and he kisses me on the cheek. Separating our hands, he
disappears into the crowded hallway towards the courtyard.
I take a deep breath and walk up to her. I plaster a big smile on my face, “Hey.”
She looks at me for a second, slams her locker and gives me a cold, “Hey.”
I sigh, “Are you mad at me?”
“Not at all,” she says sarcastically, turning to walk towards the exit.
“Jessica, please,” I say, running to her side. “Please understand that I didn’t do anything. I tried to get away but he-.”
“You could have told me,” she says stopping, causing people behind us to have to walk around. The bell rang for class, people scattered to their class rooms.
“What?”
“You could have told me what happened, instead of letting me continue to date a complete asshole,” Jessica crosses her arms.
“I know. But you know you still would have found a way to be mad at me even if I had told you earlier,” I point out.
“Well, yeah. But it would have been harder to stay mad. You could have saved me from making the stupidest mistake of my life!” her bag slides off her shoulder and lands around her forearm. Tears spring to her eyes and her bangs fall messily in front of her left eye.
I can’t help but feel terrible. Standing here in the now almost deserted hallway, she looked so vulnerable and destroyed. I wrapped my arms around her neck and pulled her into a hug.
“I’m sorry,” I say, feeling some of her tears fall onto my shirt. “Can you forgive me?”
“I guess.”
I pull away from her, “Do you want to eat lunch in the library today?”
“Hell no.”
I laugh, “You sure?”
“Yeah,
I mean Lance wasn’t there at lunch yesterday so maybe he won’t be there today.”
“Just don’t think about it anymore.
Lance is a jerk who doesn’t deserve you.”
Jessica smiles, “It’ll be hard but, thanks Jenna.”
“Hey guys,” I say, sitting next to
Hayden and Jessica.
I looked around at the table and realized that, yet again, not everyone was here.
“Where are Nolan and Lance?”
Jessica glares at me when I say
Lance’ name and I give her an apologetic look.
“I don’t know, actually,”
Luke says from across the table. “I haven’t seen Lance the past two days.”
“Neither have I,” I hear
Zac’s deep voice say, causing me to look at him. For the first time since it happened, I allowed myself to think back to when Zac had kissed me. How he had pulled me into a classroom and kissed me secretly. The whole thing was bad, but it was intriguing at the same time. I think it’s the whole “forbidden lust” thing. Whatever it was, it caused my gymnast of a stomach to do another one of its gold medal winning back flips. I kind of loved it.
I think my gaze at
Zac lasted a little too long because he starts to smirk. The feeling of Hayden’s arm being draped over my shoulders pulls me back into reality.
Another back flip.
Not knowing where else to look, my eyes fall on Luke. Cute, kind Luke who is watching Hayden while peacefully chewing on a carrot stick. Luke catches my gaze and then we both awkwardly look down at the food on the table.
Double
back flip.
God damn, what is wrong with me!? How can I possibly have feelings for three guys at once? Maybe what everyone is saying is true; maybe I am a slut.
Luke looks up from the table and his eyes pause on something behind me, “Guys, what the hell?”
Daisy, sitting next to him, follows his gaze, “
Lance?”
Jessica,
Hayden, and I all turn around. I see instantly what caught Luke’s attention.
Lance
had just entered the cafeteria, his stride laidback, like he had no care in the world. His right arm was over the shoulders of a curly blonde haired girl. The same girl who I had walked in on making out with Nolan; Kelsey.
“W-why is his arm around her?” Jessica stutters.
“My brother is a man-whore,” Daisy says in shock.
“Maybe,”
Hayden starts, turning back around, “it’s a good thing Nolan isn’t here right now.”
I walk down the hallway towards my locker. I left lunch early so I can get to my fifth period class right as the bell rings. I need the ten minutes to study for my English test. I haven’t been getting as much studying done as I should be since I’ve been at Hayden’s. Oops.
I told
Hayden to stay and finish eating. I didn’t mind walking alone. I actually liked it. It gave me time to think and get my head straight for the ten minutes in between classes, especially since my life has been a non-stop soap opera since the Slave Auction.
I walk past the boys
’ bathroom right as the door bursts open and a light haired boy comes running out. He knocks into me and my binder crashes to the floor.
“Hey!” I say and look up at him. I only then realize that it was
Nolan. “Nolan?”
His eyes and cheeks were red. The same feeling I had when Jessica was crying this morning washes over
me. I instantly knew what was wrong. “What happened with Kelsey?”
“How did you know this was about Kelsey?” he asks, whipping his nose on his sleeve.
I pick up my binder and bite my lip.
“Oh God, they made it public, didn’t they? What, did you see them walking around holding hands?” he asks a bit angrily.
“Not… Exactly.”
Nolan
rolls his eyes and collapses on the bench across from the bathroom.
“What happened?” I ask, sitting on the cool metal bench beside him.
“After school yesterday, I was walking home and saw them kissing in the parking lot. I couldn’t believe it. She tried to talk to me but I wouldn’t let her. She said she was sorry and that it didn’t mean anything. She sent me texts all night long and I was starting to believe her,” Nolan pauses to wipe his nose again and then he break out into a sarcastic smile. “What a load of shit, right? It obviously meant nothing, right, because that’s why she would go and be with him today at lunch.”
“
Nolan,” I try to comfort him but he interrupts.
“She told me she was sick yesterday! I was just straight up lied to! And I thought
Lance was my best friend, I don’t know why he would do this to me. I think that’s what hurts the most.”
I feel a pang of guilt when I realize this must be how Jessica felt when she found out
Lance kissed me. We are best friends and I didn’t tell her.
“
Nolan,” I try again, wrapping my arm around him. My words echo off the bare walls and the tiled floor, “She obviously isn’t worth your time Nolan. I mean seriously, telling you she’s sick and then kissing your best friend in the school parking lot in front of everyone? Who does that? It’s stupid and shallow and a person like that isn’t worth your time.”
“I’ve just,”
Nolan breathes deeply, “I’ve just never had a real girlfriend before. And it just felt real around her, you know? And everyone knew we were dating and now they probably all know she’s seeing Lance. It’s just embarrassing having the whole school know you’re a joke.”
“You are definitely not a joke,
Nolan,” I lean towards him a little bit to try to get him to look at me. “What you need is someone to get your mind off this. Maybe if you went out on another date or found another girl you wouldn’t care so much about her a Lance.”
“Well, yeah I guess. But who?”
Nolan’s gorgeous blue eyes burn into mine sadly.
An idea pops into my head, “Jessica!”
“Jessica?”
“Yeah! You like her right?” I ask, hoping this will work.
“Well, as a friend.”
“Oh come on, she’s gorgeous! And she’s really nice, and funny, and sweet,” I try to convince him but he still looks skeptical. I put my hand on his knee and lower my voice, “And she’s going through the exact same thing you are right now.
Lance and Kelsey deserve each other. It hasn’t been easy on her either.”
“I don’t know,”
Nolan looks down and I move my hand away. “I don’t have those kinds of feelings for her. And there is someone else who I have liked for too long of a time now.”
I nod, “Then talk to her just to talk. Vent with someone who understands. And maybe, Jessica can help you get the girl you like. Because if you have liked this girl for a really long time, it’s time you should do something about it.”
“Okay,” he looks up at me. “But, I’m scared.”
I laugh, “Don’t be. The worst thing she can do is say no. Just talk to Jessica, she needs it.”
He sighs, “Okay, thanks Jenna.”
He wraps his arms around my neck and pulls me close for a hug.
“No problem,” I say patting his back. I pull away, “I really have to go, though. I have a test I need to study for.”
Nolan
laughs, “Okay.”
I stand up and walk to exit the hall as the bell signaling the end of lunch rings. “Remember what I told you,
Nolan.”
I turn around to look at him and he nods and smiles. He is so adorable.
“Where are you?” I ask Jessica into my phone.
“Just wait there, I will be there in a few minutes.”
“Okay, hurry. I can’t leave
Hayden waiting,” I say and then take the phone away from my ear. I click the “end” button and then text Hayden, “I will be a little late in meeting you at your car. Jessica wants to tell me something.”
I pull my jacket closer to me and shiver at the breeze that just picked up. I was waiting for her behind the school next to the now nearly empty bike rack. I looked around as students entered the hallways or got into their cars.
My head perked up as one of the hallway doors opened, expecting it to be Jessica. Disappointment flooded over me when I saw it was some random senior guy I had never seen before. But he definitely seemed to know me. He caught my gaze and started walking in my direction. I didn’t think much of it until he stopped right in front of me.
“Hey, slut.”
“Excuse you?” I ask, baffled.
“How was it sleeping at both
Luke’s and Hayden’s house? Did you sleep with both of them?” he steps closer to me and I step back. He was tall, with short, blonde hair. His eyes were a dark, dark brown. By the size of his arms, I could tell he played football. I was instantly frightened by him and I wanted to get away. A memory of him standing up and bidding on me at one of the auctions flashed in my mind. Where is Jessica?
“What? No.”
“Oh, please. They always do,” he scoffs. “But you, you have taken it to a whole new level. Never has one of the Last Girls ended up dating the guy who bid on her. You must be really good in bed, huh?”
I back away again, “I didn’t sleep with any of them, okay? Just leave me alone.”
He glares at me through his chocolate eyes, “Don’t tell me what to do, whore.”
“What did you just say to her?”
Chocolate eyes and I both glance behind him to see the one and only
Zac Madison, in his usual leather jacket.
“This is none of your business,
Zac,” the guy spat. But, his voice had lost some strength; he was scared.
“Oh, it is definitely my business, Stephens
.” Zac steps forward causing the guy to step back and almost bump into me. “Were you really just harassing a girl all alone?”
“No, we were just talking.”
I wanted to speak up but my vocal chords had a different idea. They decided to stay absolutely silent.