The Kiss on Castle Road (A Lavender Island Novel) (30 page)

“No. I’ve always thrown my heart in. During the war, you know, we didn’t know how much time we were going to have. So we threw our hearts into everything. I was committed to dancing. I was committed to the studio. I had a wonderful marriage. I have wonderful children. I will leave this world with no regrets. I know I gave them all everything I had. And you know what? Nothing really is forever. Sometimes the things you commit to leave
you
before you’re ready. My husband died. I had a child who died, too. So you need to take hold of them and seize them and enjoy them while they’re yours to enjoy. And give them your whole heart.”

The watches blurred under Natalie’s vision as she thought about that. Doris was right—everyone was on borrowed time. And when you were given the gift of love, whether from a sister or a niece or a grandmother or a man, you should treat it as such—a true gift. One you might not be allowed to enjoy forever. But one you could decide to enjoy as long as time would let you.

“I have to talk to Elliott,” she whispered. “I might have blown it already, pushing him toward some other woman. And his sister still might never approve of me. But I need to at least explain to him what he meant to me. He deserves that.”

“Just be open to the idea of a relationship,” Paige said. “Don’t be scared. This is worth taking a chance on. I admire you, Natalie. And I love you to death.”

“You
admire
me?”

“Of course. I admire your independence, and how you always land on your feet. And how you completed this mancation. And how, no matter what, you can find a passion. And hey, I admire this.” She waved her hand across the decorated room.

Doris nodded her agreement.

“Thanks, you two.” Natalie stood.

Both women turned and threw their arms around her.

“Now go get that guy,” Doris whispered in her ear.

Elliott took the steps two at a time up to Nell’s town house and jabbed his finger at the doorbell until it just became obnoxious.

“Elliott! Stop! I hear you,” Nell said, swinging the door open.

“I know you’re trying to take care of me, and ensure my happiness, but I can’t abide by this anymore.”

Her eyes widened. “Hello to you, too. C’mon in. And you can’t abide by what?”

“I can’t come in. I just want to come to tell you to stop.”

“Stop what?”

“Butting into my life.”

“
Butting into your life?
What are you talking about?”

“Look, Nell, I love you. Dearly. You’ve been a great sister to me, and I know you have only my best interests at heart. And I will never forget that you saved my life that day. And that you basically raised me ever since. But I think you’ve been protecting me for so long, you don’t know where
your
wants for me and
my
true wants begin and end.”

Nell scooped Max up off the entryway floor. “Elliott, what are you talking about?”

Elliott lowered his voice near Max. “I need you to stay out of my love life. And stop with the blind dates. And stop interfering with women like Natalie Grant.”

“Natalie Grant? Are we still on this? I thought you were taking Vanessa tonight.”

“I was. But I’m canceling.”

“Canceling? Elliott, I flew her in especially for this event. I have her staying here for two nights. Can’t you just show her around?”

“No.”

Nell’s eyes grew wide. And then misted over.

Elliott looked away. He didn’t want to hurt her, but he had to put an end to this.

“You’ll have to show her around yourself. I’m meeting Natalie at the dance tonight.”

“You can’t just fall in love with the first pretty young thing who pays attention to you. You have to give this some thought.”

He blinked back at her. “You think I haven’t given this some thought?”

“I just think you’re swayed by the first beautiful woman paying attention to you, and you’re not thinking properly. Natalie isn’t right for you.”

Elliott looked away and ground his teeth together. “That’s what I’m talking about. You need to back out of this. You think you know what’s best for me, but you’re not asking me how I feel about it. You want me to have a woman who will take care of me, but you don’t understand that what I need is a woman I can take care
of
. I feel like I’ve been running all my life—away from fears, away from people, away from getting too close to others for fear they’ll die on me. I focus on work because it’s easier than facing life, or people. But here’s what I know—ever since I met Natalie, I haven’t felt fear. In fact, I worry about
her
fears, and all I want to do is protect her. And protecting Natalie has given me a confidence and a courage I didn’t even know I had. Courage, and love, and protecting her, and being a man—they’re all intertwined for me now. They’re all wrapped up in meeting her. I’ve never felt so whole and alive as I have these past three months. You have to give me this, Nell. You have to let me go. And stop worrying about me. Let me feel that same kind of love you do for someone else.”

She bounced Max in her arms as her eyes glistened.

“I just don’t want someone to be
taking
from you all the time,” she said in a small voice. “You’re very giving, and I don’t want someone taking advantage of you.”

“She’s not taking from me. She’s giving
to
me.”

“What is she giving you?”

“Courage. Love. Laughter. Confidence. A reason to come home every day. And acceptance—a lot of acceptance—she never wants to change me.”

Nell looked away. He didn’t quite mean that as the barb it probably felt like, but she took it that way. And he didn’t correct her.

“She’s not taking your money?” she asked weakly.

“She doesn’t even know I have money. And the few things I’ve offered to pay for—she never takes my help. She even wants to buy my groceries all the time.”

Nell stared at one of Max’s complicated bead toys and thought that over. “She’s never asked you for anything?”

“Not once.”

She bounced Max once more and then put him down to crawl on the floor. “I can try to give her a chance.”

“Give her a chance? Nell, you just drove her away! She overheard you talking to Jim today in my kitchen and heard your ‘wounded bird’ comment. She’s convinced now she’s not right for me.”

Nell bit her lip and watched Max. “I’m sorry. I’ll make it up to you. But could you just finish this date with Vanessa and then—”

“
No!
Nell, no. You’re not getting it.
I’m in love with Natalie.
”

As soon as the words left his mouth, he sucked in some air.
Damn.
He hadn’t even admitted that out loud to himself yet. And there it was. Out in the open. He was in love with Natalie.

“And now she’s leaving,” he said. “And I think both of us have blown it. This might have cost me the best thing that ever happened to me.”

A silence fell as Nell continued to bite her lip. Max cooed and reached up for her. “What can I do?” she whispered.

He was stunned that she finally seemed to get it.

“It might be too late to do anything,” he admitted. “But I want one more chance to talk to her tonight. And I don’t want you interfering. If you see her tonight, I want you to be polite. No more meddling.”

A tear started to roll down Nell’s cheek. Elliott felt bad. He wasn’t angry. But he just needed to make things right now.

He reached out and pulled her to him. “I love you, Nell.”

She crushed her face against his shirt. “Sunrises, Elliott.”

“Sunrises, sis.”

They stood that way for several seconds, the setting sun streaming in low across the porch, remembering all they’d meant to each other as kids but knowing they needed to move forward now as adults with their individual lives. Finally, Elliott stepped away and held her shoulders.

“Now I need you to get something for me.”

CHAPTER 27

The cool sea air swept her long dress around her ankles as Natalie ascended the steps at the outside entrance to the Casas del Sur ballroom. She wasn’t used to attending events solo—she’d always kept a man on her arm to feel more secure, free from other men’s leers—but this felt strangely comfortable.

The Colonel had pulled her into his room earlier, made her a martini, and filled her in on his whole outline for how he planned to get Steve Stegner out of his position with a new board of directors the seniors were petitioning for. They’d petitioned the owner weeks ago. And he told her the board was unanimous about wanting Natalie to take Steve’s place—they hoped if they hurried, she’d consider staying on the island and taking the job.

The offer took her by surprise. At first, she expected the feeling of claustrophobia to hit her, but it never did. Instead, she was filled with a warmth of being wanted and accepted by this wonderful group of seniors she was proud to call friends. After talking to Doris and Paige about commitment, and how it was so much about living in the moment, a feeling of strength came over her at the idea of committing to a job and an island, instead of fear. She was much more confident now. And, after her mancation this spring, she also knew she truly didn’t need a man to help her navigate through life.

Though she did want a man.

A particular one.

One who was standing over by the punchbowl right now, looking a little awkward, staring at the cheese platters with a plastic cup in his hand.

“Elliott!” A smile overtook her as she drew nearer. He gave her one of his sexiest grins. The one that looked shy and mysterious at the same time—as if they had a wicked secret to share, which, given their previous wild night, she supposed they did.

He held her gaze until she had to look away—but only to take in the rest of him. His crisp white collar framed his Adam’s apple; the sleek lines of his black tuxedo outlined his strong shoulders. He had his glasses back on, and his new updated frames looked sexy and comfortable on him. His hair was combed neatly, but a few wisps had already escaped down his forehead, and his black bow tie sat just crooked enough to look very Elliott.

He threw her another mischievous grin when he realized she was checking him out.

Natalie reached out to give him a hug. The only thing that stole away from her joy at seeing him look this good was that he’d done it for another woman. And that he very well might hate Natalie right now.

But his smile never wavered as his bright-blue eyes took her in from head to toe. Hate was not part of his repertoire of emotions.

“Wow,” he said. “You look . . . Wow.” He shook his head.

She’d worn her hair down, letting it cascade down her back. The dress was like nothing she’d ever worn before—true Old Hollywood glamour, fitted against her body from top to bottom, with a layer of long-sleeved lace covering her collarbone and sitting off her shoulder. Her shoes were not too high—she was tall enough—but they were definitely more sparkly and strappy and feminine than she was used to. She felt strong. And happy. And confident.

She pushed a few curls off her shoulder. “Thank you. You look amazing, too.”

He gave her a return grin that bordered on relief.

“Where’s your date?” she asked, breaking the spell.

He cleared his throat. “No date.” He put his cup down.

“No date? But where’s . . .” She looked around briefly and tried to remember the woman’s name.

“As I said, I have no interest. Can I get you something to drink? Punch is here, or I could go to the bar for a gimlet.”

“But what . . .” She tried to put everything into place but had to reframe how she thought the evening would go. But mostly she couldn’t help the joy bubbling up that this fine-looking man right here had no lady on his arm.

“I have something for you,” he said.

Before she could figure out what he was talking about, he stepped a little closer. “But first I have to ask you something.”

She looked up to meet his gaze.

“Would you be my date tonight? No pressure. No commitment except tonight. But I’d love to have you near me all night.”

Elliott’s manly, salty scent drifted up around her and made her slightly heady for a second, as it instantly launched her back to the memory of being against his naked body. She managed a bob of her head as her voice disappeared.

“Good,” he said. “Then let me get the something for you.”

He leaned down underneath the punch table and whisked out a pot of light-yellow gerbera daisies that matched her dress perfectly. “I always get the color right. Law of probability,” he said with a wink. He handed them to her. “I’m sorry I didn’t pick you up at the door. But I’ll have you note I don’t have on dungarees.”

Natalie smiled. “No, you don’t. And your shoes are polished, too.”

“And may I be the first to say you have sea lion hair?”

Natalie laughed and took the potted daisies. “Thank you.”

“Natalie?” Katherine from the prom committee came up behind her, broke the spell, and grabbed Natalie’s hand. “It’s time to get things started.”

Natalie looked up at Elliott with disappointment and apology.

But he simply met her with a proud grin. “It’s your turn to shine now,” he said. “I’ll be waiting for you. First dance.”

Natalie kept him in her sights as Katherine pulled her away.
First dance?
Her pleasure. The idea that this man was hers all night settled her soul as she shuffled up to the stage with her arm curled around her potted plant. She was ready to start the party.

Natalie welcomed the families, explained the evening’s lineup, encouraged everyone to mingle and enjoy cocktails, and cast furtive glances at Elliott as he made the rounds among his new island friends.

She lugged her potted plant around proudly, explaining to everyone who asked that her date had bought it for her because they both preferred live plants. Hours later—after dinner, soft swing tunes, and making the rounds of hellos—she stood again with the microphone in one hand and the plant in the other and announced the three nominees for Senior Prom king, then the three nominees for Senior Prom queen. The court shuffled forward, and all took their places at the front of the room.

“And your new Senior Prom king and queen are . . .” Natalie announced. “Stanley Koll and Marie Cosgrove!”

The entire place exploded into applause.

The Colonel walked across the front of the room and bowed to ask for Marie’s hand. She took it, and the two of them spun out to the dance floor to a slow Tommy Dorsey tune that Natalie had picked out. But as Natalie was clapping frantically through her tears, the Colonel walked up to the band director and whispered something in his ear. The band came to a halt. Natalie frowned. What was the matter?

The band director stopped, turned toward his band, raised his hand in the air, and they all broke out into a modern hip-hop song that Natalie didn’t even know, heavy on the bass.

Stunned, she began to march over to see what the problem was, but Doris and fourteen others sauntered out to the dance floor and joined in with the Colonel and Marie—all doing a flash-mob dance. As the music thumped and the base boomed, all twenty seniors swiveled, shook, and clapped their hands in unison, all in a line. The guests—all the seniors’ families, children, grandchildren, and friends—went wild, everyone leaping out of their seats and joining in the clapping, straining to get a better view of the Colonel and Marie and the others doing their moves.

When the dance was over, the guests continued clapping uproariously as the Colonel hugged everyone, Marie hugged everyone, and Doris hugged her whole troupe. Finally, the Colonel lifted his hand and struck up the band again into the original tune.

As the Tommy Dorsey tune swelled onto the dance floor, and Natalie stopped clapping and smiling, the lights finally dimmed, and the Colonel and Marie went back to their slow waltz. A few bars in, the Colonel started calling others out. Ballroom dancing for the evening officially began.

“That was great,” Natalie heard behind her.

She looked over her shoulder to see Elliott, beaming at both her and the dancers.

“I had nothing to do with that,” she admitted.

“Yeah, that had Doris written all over it. I heard the music on her player during one of my dance lessons and wondered what they were up to. Would you join me in this dance?” He held his arm out in a formal pose.

“Wow, you look like you know what you’re doing.”

“The Colonel and Doris have been pounding this stuff into my brain. Is it working?”

“It must be, because I really want to dance with you right now.”

Elliott pulled her out onto the floor. He picked up the waltz rhythm as quickly as he had during their practice and glided her around the floor, his hand firmly at her back.

Natalie enjoyed being in his arms, especially when he brought her closer to his chest than necessary. He smelled delicious—some kind of great aftershave she’d never noticed on him before, something with a musk undertone that smacked of daring and masculinity. He held his chin high, as Doris had probably instructed him to do, but would let just his eyes drop to meet hers and give her a playful grin.

“What did you want to talk to me about?” she finally asked.

“I’m getting up my nerve,” he said.

They swung around the edge, moving in their perfect one-two-three, one-two-three, and Natalie closed her eyes and relished the dance while she had it. She’d have to get up a little nerve, too. She needed to tell Elliott all he’d meant to her. And maybe venture into some new plans.

When the dance ended, the couples gathered to clap for the band; then the next tune started up.

“Want to go outside?” Elliott asked.

When she nodded, he guided her through a set of French doors along the side of the ballroom. They walked along the balcony until they couldn’t be seen from inside, then Natalie turned and gulped in several deep breaths of sea air. She twisted her dress until she could breathe better. She was nervous now. She wanted to talk to him, too, but admitting how she felt about him, hinting that she’d like to make more of a commitment—it would all take a lot of courage. And she was terrified another panic attack would begin.

And if it did, what was her mind telling her?

She took a deep breath and told herself to take the chance.

Elliott tugged at his collar. Damn, these bow ties were stifling. He loosened the knot ever so slightly just so he could get a little extra air. He jostled the velvet box he had in his pocket—finally secured there after a forty-five-minute hunt with Nell this afternoon. The Colonel was right—they’d done everything slightly out of order, and he might have mucked things up a little, but he had to try.

“So we have some talking to do?” she asked.

She was smiling—so beautiful, so sweet—but Elliott’s heart was racing. He was terrified about what he was going to do. And he was terrified at what her reaction would be.

“I do,” he said anyway, his throat barely squeezing the phrase out.

And then he got down on one knee.

Natalie frowned at Elliott on the balcony concrete, wondering what on earth he was doing, and then . . . Oh God . . . Her heart started racing again.