“They don’t live together,” Heather said. Loudly. “I mean, she’s been in Chicago and he’s in Milwaukee. She wouldn’t know if he jogs. Right, Cam?” Heather’s eyes bulged, forcing Camryn to agree.
“Yes, right.”
Fisher was looking angrier and angrier by the second. “The only time I remember him running is to blow off steam. That I’m aware of, he hasn’t done it in years. So what did you do, Camryn?”
What did
she
do? Why is it always something
she
did wrong? Troy couldn’t be this upset over a note and a muffin. Or maybe he was. If he only went jogging when angry, and he was sleeping when she last checked, it had to be about her. God, the last thing she wanted to do was hurt him.
“I didn’t do anything. I’m going to shower.”
“Don’t you want some breakfast?” Kuma Viola asked.
“I’m not hungry,” she said, rounding the corner and climbing the stairs before her stomach could revolt.
Troy’s feet pounded the gravel in a steady pace alongside the road. Sweat dripped from his face and onto his soaked tee. His legs had started burning over a mile back, but he didn’t stop. He was too out of shape for this. The last time he went running was his father’s birthday last year. Memories had crept up, and the only thing he could do to expel them was to run.
It had worked then. It wasn’t working now.
Camryn had been doing these little things for him half his life. Buying him peanut butter, framing a family photo, giving him a toy truck. Things to remind him of better days, to keep looking forward. That she cared. But what she did this morning was different. So very different.
Leaving a muffin with a birthday candle in it on his nightstand. It wasn’t even his birthday, just something nice to replace the bad memories. A memory only she knew, the only person whom he told. He didn’t even let himself remember.
How did she do this? Time and time again, saving him from his past and making him believe he was worth it.
Why
did she? Part of him wanted to believe she was coming around, changing the way she saw life. Part of him hoped it was because she loved him back. If this list was working, that is, and she believed in love.
If the damn muffin was just one more nice gesture, he was in for an agonizing awakening. If she couldn’t love him back, he’d never be able to look at her the same. Look at her at all. Because in those huge hazel eyes was something he’d never get from another. The yielding pink mouth he’d kissed compared to no one. Her hands, soft and healing, touched more than his skin.
She was everything. No other woman would press a kiss to his chest, over his heart, to fix the break. Could feel his pain, understand it, and ease it away. Would wipe away tears too long in coming as if to silently say the past was over now.
No one ever cared enough to leave a note on his nightstand that said, “You are someone.”
He turned and headed back in the direction of the house, picking up his pace to relieve the burn inside. Each step resounding her words.
You. Are. Someone
.
Was
he someone? If only to her? Because he could live with that. Be a son to the Covics, a friend to Fisher, a brother to Heather. And the world to Camryn. If she was the only one who really knew him, understood him, he would die happy.
First, he needed to ask her out. Date her. For real this time and not a lie to save her from the family. Find out if she returned these feelings at all, or if this was just great sex on her end. Most women confused sex with love. Cam wouldn’t. And before now, she didn’t believe in true love. He needed to know if that was still the case.
Each step hammering the gravel was closer to her. Each labored breath a metaphor for how she stole his breath. Troy believed in hope, but it had been hard to come by in his life. Once, he’d hoped for a family who loved him. Hoped for a friend to play and share things with. A home of his own that no one could take away or pollute. He’d stopped hoping after obtaining those things, thinking life was complete. His life wasn’t complete, though.
Now he hoped for her.
Slowing his pace to a walk, he made his way up the driveway. Hearing the family out back by the pool, he snuck inside the garage door to not be seen. He jogged up the stairs and into their room to shower before going in search of her.
The bathroom door was cracked open, steam billowing out from her shower. He walked to the bathroom door and dropped his hand to the knob, but she spoke before he could knock.
“Yes, I got your text. I thought you sent it by mistake.”
She was on the phone. Removing his hand, he stepped back to give her privacy and wait.
“What was I supposed to think, Maxwell? You slept with someone else. You broke up with me, remember?”
Troy froze, eyeing the door.
“Excuse me? What about Alicia? You said you were so good together. You called me a robot, among other cruel things. I obviously wasn’t good enough…” She sighed. “No, Maxwell. I’m in Colorado for the wedding. I can’t have dinner…”
Troy’s gut knotted as hope depleted. Her ex wanted her back. He was no match for an ad executive who could give her financial stability. A big house in the ’burbs. Two point five kids.
“Yes, I brought someone… No, a family friend… Yes, I have friends… That’s none of your business.”
And hope flew out the window along with all the air in his lungs. He was just a friend. A friend she could have sex with, but nothing more. There was his answer, and he didn’t even have to humiliate himself by asking her.
“Fine, Maxwell. I’ll call when we get back. I don’t know… Yes, I still have the key. Okay, Monday.”
Troy backed to the bedroom door to leave, but the bathroom door flew open first. She stood wrapped in a towel, hair damp. Her eyes widened.
“You’re back.”
He swallowed. “Yes.”
She looked behind him to the nightstand and back to him again. He fumbled for something, anything to say. But overhearing her conversation with Maxwell shot comprehension to hell.
She walked around him and tossed the muffin, complete with candle, plus the note in the trash.
“What are you doing?” He walked over and pulled the note out, setting it back on the nightstand.
“Look, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for the note or muffin to upset you. I just thought…”
Jesus, he was an ass. “I’m not upset.”
“You look upset.”
Expelling a huge breath, he walked over to her. She may want this Maxwell guy over him, but she was still Cam. She was still the considerate, cool-headed woman she always was. She deserved an explanation, because in her eyes, nothing had changed. Pulling her to him, he held the back of her head as she pressed her face to his chest.
“I’m not upset, Cam. What you did…it was very thoughtful. Thank you.”
“Are you sure?”
He closed his eyes. “Yes.”
“Why did you go out running then?”
As his eyes opened, so did his mouth, ready to tell her how he felt about her. Then he remembered hope was quashed. “I just needed some air. It had nothing to do with you. Honestly, thank you again for the note. It, um…”
Stepping back, she looked up at him. “I see,” she said.
In the blink of an eye her expression regressed to old Cam. Her gaze darted away seconds before she did. Across the room. Away from him. As he watched her dress with angered, jerking movements, he felt like the lowest life form. After sliding her feet into flip-flops, she made her way to the door.
He needed to tell her how much her gesture meant to him, or else this would be another thing in her beautiful head that she thought she messed up.
“You’re the only person on Earth, Camryn, who ever made me feel like a somebody.”
From the corner of his eye, he saw her turn. “You
are
a somebody.”
Damn her.
Pivoting, he made his way to the bathroom before he could open his mouth and lose everything.
Chapter Sixteen
Life Lessons According to Camryn:
Real women don’t cry, they wine.
“The plane landed an hour early,” Heather said, setting her phone on the kitchen table and drying her wet swimming suit with a towel. “The airport shuttle can’t get them for two more hours.”
Heather’s two best girlfriends, Shana and Katie, were supposed to fly in early in time for the rehearsal, along with Justin’s friends, John and Cade. Though they weren’t in the wedding party, they had an active role as ushers and doing readings. The extended family was coming in later tonight and going right to the hotel.
The family was out back by the pool, thinking they had a few more hours until they needed to get ready or pick up their friends. Troy was still upstairs, taking the longest shower in recorded history.
“I can go get them,” Camryn said. “You need time to get ready. I’ll do it.”
After Maxwell’s phone call and Troy’s sudden distance, she could use some alone time to drive. Katie, most assuredly, would be a distraction. Heather’s oldest friend was one of those women that every man wanted and every woman wanted to be. Despite that, Camryn liked her a lot.
“Do what?” Troy asked, walking into the kitchen. Wearing a pair of khakis and a fitted black crew, he looked so handsome in casual dress clothes. His dark blond hair was still wet from his shower, brushing his collar and ears. Fire churned in her stomach, lighting her nerves.
She’d never had such a physical response to a man like with Troy. Looking at him made her think of all the wicked things they could do. Things only he could teach her. Things she’d only do with him.
Wicked was not in her vocabulary.
Heather looked between the two of them. “What’s going on?”
“Nothing,” Troy said, shoving his hands in his pockets.
Heather looked doubtful, but didn’t pry further. “Our friends’ plane came in early. Cam’s going to pick them up.”
Troy nodded, darting a glance at Camryn, and swiftly away. “I’ll go with her.”
“That’s not necessary,” Camryn said, but he glared at her, shutting out all protest.
“I said I’ll go,” he barked. His hands propelled to his hips. “I’ll get the keys from Bernice.” He turned and left the room before Camryn even had time to react.
“Wow,” Heather said. “Lovers quarrel?”
Camryn didn’t do fighting, so she had no idea what to do with Troy like this. She didn’t even know why he was so upset. The abuse from his past obviously still hurt him deeply. She thought by leaving him the note he would understand how she saw him, that he wasn’t just a someone, but a someone to her. Maybe by her doing that he realized what a mistake they were making, and he changed his mind about them. Or seen as an act of nastiness, it just brought back all the painful memories he tried to block out.
Camryn rubbed her chest. “Tell Troy I’ll meet him in the garage.”
She walked through the laundry room and into the garage. Opening the back door to the Hortons’ SUV, she grabbed the lever to extend the third row seat, but she couldn’t maneuver both the seat and handle to pull it out.
A large hand slid over hers, stopping her movement. From behind, Troy’s body pressed against her back, adjusting the seat and flipping it into position. Without delay, he stepped away and climbed in the passenger seat.
“Thanks,” she mumbled, standing with the open rear door between them. Tremors coursed through her body, making the heat outside feel like a bitter Wisconsin winter.
He extended his hand out the passenger window, the keys dangling from one finger. She closed the door and took the keys, then rounded the car and got in. Her hands were shaking too much to start the car on the first attempt.
His glance darted her way. “Want me to drive?”
She stared at the steering wheel. A heavy weight pressed down on her chest, tears clogging her throat. The only man who ever seemed to want her now couldn’t even look at her. All those nice words and items on his list that had been changing her, making her happy, were now another harsh slap and regret. Just like everything else. How stupid she was to think things could be different. That they could be different.
She
could be anything other than what she always was.
“What pictures are in your head now, Cam? What are you imagining this time so you can stay ever calm, not feeling a damn thing?”
She jerked. The cruelty of what he said, throwing her honesty and secret in her face, had her fighting a waging battle to stay in control, to not to die of embarrassment and shame. Nothing had ever hurt this bad. Like being ripped apart. No shred of hope or promise left. There were no visions or imagination that would ever erase this.
She sucked in a breath, swallowed, and turned the key.
Drive. Just drive
.
He said nothing more, the car eerily quiet until the GPS dinged, instructing her to turn right. To kill the silence, she hit the radio power button, and classical music softly played. He reached over and hit a preset, blaring hard rock through the speakers. She turned it down two notches and kept her eyes focused ahead.
Heather’s friends were waiting outside of baggage claim when they pulled up. Troy and Camryn exited the car as Katie jumped up off a bench. Her blonde curls bounced almost as emphatically as her breasts. Camryn glanced at Troy. Katie was the type of woman Troy usually dated, except Katie had more brain cells.