Read The Darkest Secret Online

Authors: Gena Showalter

The Darkest Secret (25 page)

The loveliness of the bird was surprising, considering the ugliness of everything else down here.

The little boy gently held the bird in both hands, muttering soothing words. Those golden wings gradually stopped flapping. Of course, that's when the boy shoved the tiny creature into his mouth and bit off the head.

Haidee gagged and quickly looked away—right at a group of men who'd locked their sights on her and Amun. Those men were striding toward them, closing the distance. Damn it. She never should have paused to watch the games.

“Amun,” she whispered fiercely.

I see them.
He released her, gearing for a fight they both knew would happen.
If I tell you to run, you run and hide and don't return. Understand?

As if. But rather than tell him she planned to stay and help, possibly distracting him, she remained silent and palmed two blades in each hand. The men were almost upon them…they were big, bigger than Amun, with paper-thin skin that draped loosely over pitted bone, their eyes
merely sunken holes of black…and still they drew ever closer…

Just as he'd done with the ticket handler, Amun stiffened. And not in preparation for battle.

“Can you read their minds?” she asked.

Yes.

He said no more, but then, he didn't have to. The men intended to do something vile. To her, she was sure.

“Six against two. Let's see if we can even out those odds.” Haidee threw two of her weapons. The first hit the biggest of the men in the jugular, and he instantly toppled. The second hit the man next to him right in the eye socket. He screamed as he fell.

The other four paid their fallen comrades no heed, continuing forward.

Run,
Amun commanded her.

She didn't.

Haidee! Now!

Okay. She had to tell him. “I'm not letting you fly solo on this. I'm here. I'll help.”

He growled.

The men reached them and formed a circle around them, effectively surrounding them with a wall of muscle and menace. Wouldn't have been so bad, except the two men she'd felled suddenly rose, jerked the weapons from their bodies and took their places in the circle, far angrier than they'd been before.

Oh…shit. They couldn't be killed. Dread slithered through her, choking her.

“We want the girl,” one of them said, and all of them gave her a once-over, lingering on her breasts, between her legs, mentally stripping her and making her shudder in revulsion.

“Well, news flash. You can't have me,” she snapped. She would rather die. Again.

“Wasn't talking to you, bitch.” The shithead's gaze never left Amun. “Give her to us, and you can go on your way. Alive.”

He'll pay for disrespecting you, I swear it,
Amun told her, and he sounded so calm he could have been discussing his favorite type of doughnut.
But first, since you refused to obey me, and yes, we will be discussing that, ask him if he's seen the Horsemen.

That, she obeyed. And as her words echoed between them, an almost visible wave of fear swept over the men. They began to tremble, their skin taking on a grayish cast. The Horsemen were so depraved they frightened even psychos, huh? Awesome. Then the fear turned to anger, and the men scowled at Amun with more fury than before, as if they blamed him for what they'd felt.

“Forget those that shall not be named and tell us what you want for her,” one of the men said.

Those that shall not be named?

A muscle ticked below Amun's eye as he took each guy's measure.

“Can't you talk, demon?” another growled. “We want the woman. Now.”

So they recognized what he was, but they weren't scared of him as they evidently were of the Horsemen. If that was the case, though, why didn't they simply attack him?

“You can have her back when we're done,” still another said.

They laughed in eerie unison.

“'Course, she'll be in pieces, and we'll probably keep the good ones, but you can have what's left.”

Run, Haidee,
Amun repeated into her mind.
And this time, do it.
He didn't wait to see if she had—she hadn't—but launched himself at the men. He moved so quickly, she registered only the blur of his slashing hands and glistening blades.

The men converged on him with the same eerie unison in which they'd laughed, kicking at him, swinging their arms like clubs. She couldn't throw herself into the fray because there was no way to tell which body parts belonged to Amun and which to the shitheads. Their positions changed too swiftly.

Blood sprayed, some red, some black. Grunts and groans resounded. Then Amun landed at her feet, wheezing, his face already sliced to ribbons. The men were on him an instant later, their momentum shoving her backward.

She righted herself, that image of Amun filling her with a rage so potent, her blood began to thicken with ice. No one hurt her man. No one. Mist formed a cloud in front of her nose each time she exhaled. She knew anyone who looked at her would see actual crystals glinting in her hair, on her skin. This strong a reaction hadn't happened in so long, she'd almost forgotten she was capable of it.

Hate filled her, joining the ice. So much hate. She hated these men, hated what they'd planned. Hated that they lived.

She couldn't allow them to live.

Amun managed to throw the bundle of bodies off him and jump to his feet. His weapons had been ripped from his grip, so he used his fists now, pummeling with all his might. But every time he cracked one of those fatheads to the side, breaking the spinal cord, the men would shake off the blow and attack with new fervor. Then one of them realized Haidee was alone, seemingly unprotected and disengaged.

His grin was evil.

Hers was worse. “Come here,” she said with such calm even she was surprised.

Those black eyes narrowed, a forked tongue swiping over too-thin lips. Though he was obviously suspicious
about her sudden eagerness, the man complied, moving closer.

He pushed her down the moment he reached her, throwing himself on top of her, trying to rip off her jeans. Haidee let him,
helped
him, wrapping her arms around him and pressing her lips into his.

His tongue thrust out, hard, attempting to pry her teeth apart. He needn't have bothered. She opened willingly, blowing the ice of her breath, the very hate of her soul, straight into his mouth. He convulsed. In shock, perhaps, or maybe in fear. Or even pain. She wanted him to feel pain. Then he stilled, unable to move, literally frozen, but that wasn't enough. He hadn't suffered enough.

She shoved him off of her and stood, distantly noting the blue pallor of his skin, the unmoving features, the stiffness of his body. More. She needed more. More ice, more hate, more death. These men deserved to die. Her mind locked on that thought—
deserved, deserved, deserved
—and glided to the heap of struggling bodies, brushing her fingers over one, then the other. They, too, froze in place, their skin hardening as the ice flowed over them.

More. Deserved. The remaining three offenders noticed the condition of their friends and leapt away from Amun, watching her through horror-filled eyes.

“What—what'd you do?”

“What
are
you?”

“Don't come any closer!”

Amun pushed to his feet, stepping away from her, as well. His expression was unreadable.

More. Deserved. She walked toward the men, and they scampered backward, tripping over their own feet, falling. More. Deserved.

Haidee.

“Come,” she said. “Taste me.”

Haidee.

Amun's voice pushed through some of the ice, but not the hate. She hated these men, knew they had to die by her hand. She reached out. One touch, just a single touch, and she would have what she wanted. Their destruction. Everyone's destruction. Yes, everyone's. She had only to finish with these two, and she could move on, destroy everyone.

They crab-crawled backward, desperate to escape her. One of them wasn't fast enough, and she managed to latch onto his ankle. She grinned. He seemed to turn into stone right before her eyes. More. Deserved.

Haidee, sweetheart. Look at me.

Sweetheart. She liked when Amun called her sweetheart. He made her feel special. A little more of the ice inside her melted. Until she realized her final target was only a few steps away. More. Deserved. Destruction within her reach.

Haidee, sweetheart. Look at me. Please.

Again the ice melted, and this time Amun's plea reached even her hatred, muting the coldest threads. Slowly she turned to face him. “What do you want?” The frosty rage in her voice stunned her. Upset her. It shouldn't be directed at Amun.

The last man is gone, sweetheart. You can come back to me now.

Come back to him? What did he mean by that? She was right here, right in front of him. Frowning, she stepped toward him. She would shake him, make him realize.

Like the enemy had done, he backed away.
Sweetheart. Your eyes are pure white, and even being near you is painful to me. I need you to come back to me.

Sweetheart again. More of the ice melted, and the hate muted yet another degree, then another, until the emotion was at a low simmer. She hurt him? She didn't want to hurt Amun. Ever. She just wanted to love…him.

Her knees almost gave out. Love? Did she love him?

As the question echoed through her mind, she swayed, a wave of dizziness sweeping her. Just before she hit the ground, strong arms banded around her and kept her upright.

There you are, sweetheart. I knew you'd come back to me.
Amun held her tightly to his side, and to her relief, he didn't freeze. In fact, his heat wrapped around her, melting the rest of the ice.

“I'm sorry,” she said, voice shaking. “I didn't mean to—”

Don't be sorry. You saved our asses. Now come on. We need to get out of here before reinforcements show up.

“Ye seek the Horsemen, do ye? Don't deny. I heard,” a small voice suddenly said behind them. “Come, come. I show ye.”

Amun turned them both, and when she focused she saw a tiny female with the lower half of a bull and the top half of a human. Small hands waved them forward.

“This be fun,” the female said with a shady giggle. “Come, come, I show ye.” She darted away before they could reply.

We're going to go with her. We don't have any other choice.

“Yes, we do. We can choose not to go with her.” With Haidee's luck, the creature would lead them into a nest of vipers, piranha and rape-minded giants. Oh, wait. Been there, done that. What came next would probably be worse.

My demon went silent the moment you—
He stopped himself. The moment she'd…what? Become consumed by the cold?
My demon is still silent, which means I can't figure out where the Horsemen are located. That little female is our only shot. Just don't let anything happen to me, okay?
Amun said with what seemed to be…humor?

No, surely not. She didn't think she'd ever heard him joke with her before. And really, not many men could tease their woman about being stronger than they were. “I, uh, won't.”

Thank you.
The semblance of a smile curled the corners of his lips as he ushered her forward, quickly closing the distance to reach Bull Girl. The almost-grin stunned her more than his teasing. He was just so beautiful, and as amused as he clearly was, he was also distracting.

Love, she thought again.

She couldn't love him. She was careful, always careful, to guard her heart. Yes, she lusted for Amun, cared for him, wanted him safe and happy. That didn't mean she loved him, though. Love weakened, made you vulnerable. Especially love that wasn't returned.

“Here, here,” the now-bouncing creature said. She stopped in front of the biggest tent in the area, laughter and smoke drifting from the seams in the front flap. “They be here. This be fun.”

Only then did Haidee recall the old woman's earlier warning. Death. Pain. Screaming.

Soon.

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

T
HEY WERE SMOKING CIGARS
and playing poker.

Amun had never seen the four horsemen of the Apocalypse before, but despite the crowd of demons hovering around them, he recognized them instantly. They sat around a table comprised of barbed wire, enveloped in a tobacco-scented haze. Three males, one female, and all four were physically perfect beings. Even more so than Zacharel. Or William.

He studied them. Friend or foe? The female had flaxen hair that waved to her waist, iridescent sparkles woven through the strands, and eyes of the deepest purple. The males were a colorful mix, one raven-haired, one sandy-locked, and one completely bald, his scalp tanned to a golden glow.

They wore clothes very similar to Amun's. Black shirts, black pants. They were relaxed, laughing seductively as they revealed their cards, then ribbing the losers unmercifully. What gave them away was the color of their auras. Amun had never noticed anyone's aura before, but these were undeniable. The shades enveloped them like a second skin, the female's white, one of the males' red, one black and one a pale green.

The Rainbow Brigade, he thought.

Haidee stepped to his side and was given her first full look at them. She gasped.

Amun's jaw clenched—
me, only want me
—but the sound prodded Secrets from his hiding place as effectively
as her coldness had driven him there earlier. While Amun had battled the six men who'd wanted to “borrow” her, she'd turned into ice walking. Her hair had morphed into icicles, her skin had looked like crystal and her eyes…her eyes had lost all hint of color.

He'd been riveted by the beauty of her, queen of the winter storm, and awed by the strength of her. His demon had been terrified, retreating as deep into his mind as possible. The others had felt the pull of her again, even though she hadn't touched Amun. They'd fought, screamed. Yeah, they'd done that before, but never that quickly or that determinedly.

He just didn't know what to do about it.

Whatever kept Haidee from dying eternally, whatever brought her back to life again and again, had to be responsible for her change. No mere human could do that. What that made her, what that was, though, he still didn't know, and he wasn't sure Secrets had the balls to try and find out. Still. They were going to have to merge with her mind again.

Amun had to know the truth. And maybe, with the answer, he could find a way to save her from the torture of being reanimated. Of course, that meant she would die permanently one day, and he couldn't even contemplate that without sickening.

She was his.

And he was going to have her. All of her. Yes, the cold he felt while they pleasured each other could hurt him. He realized that now. But he wasn't going to let something as minor as freezing to death stop him from being with her.

He'd already lost the war with his resolve to stay away from her. While they were down here, at least. Up there, they would part, and that knowledge only increased his urgency to have her. Tonight. Tonight, he wiped her former boyfriend from her mind and claimed every inch of her.

At least Secrets wasn't whimpering, or the others screaming, because she stood at his side. That was a start. Secrets was too focused on the Horsemen and their thoughts—or rather, what consisted of their thoughts—enjoying the puzzle of them. There was a strange buzzing noise inside White's head, shrieks inside Red's, moans inside Black's and utter silence inside Green's.

“She the one who iced the congo?” Red asked no one in particular. A cigar hung from the side of his mouth.

The crowd finally noticed Amun and Haidee. Some snarled and flashed their teeth, some licked their lips in glee, but all left the tent as if their feet were on fire. Only the Horsemen remained.

The congo. The men who'd thought to beat him to pulp, allowing them to rape and dismember Haidee without interference? Most likely. Guys had been as big as apes, with a mind-set to match, so the name fit.

“I believe I asked you a question, warrior.” Red tossed the cards atop the tabletop and turned, eyes of the cruelest blue leveling on Amun. The shrieks inside the being's head increased in volume. Secrets burrowed through them, still seeking thoughts and intentions. “I'll hear your answer now.”

“Yes,” Haidee said, answering for him. She sounded confident, unafraid. But for once, Amun could feel the emotions pouring off her. His brave girl was terrified but determined. “I did. I iced them.”

If the Horsemen thought to punish her… Amun curled his fingers around a blade the congo hadn't managed to steal from him, ready, almost eager.

“Very cool,” Black said, waving them over with a smile that did little to soothe Amun's dark mood. “Sit, sit. We've been expecting you.”

They had, had they?

Amun needed a better read on them, and suspected
Secrets would have an easier time sorting through the noise if Haidee wasn't there. Yet he couldn't be without her. Not just to guard her—not that she needed guarding, because damn, he was still in shock over her ability—but because the other demons inside him might use her absence to overtake him. He would lose focus, returning to that mindless state of horror and pain.

Stand behind me and press your back into the tent flap,
he told her as he moved forward. He gave her a gentle push in that direction.
You've got a weapon?

“Yes,” she whispered.

She didn't question him, but he knew she wanted to. Once again, he wished the connection went both ways, that she could push her voice into his head. Why the hell couldn't she? Just then he wouldn't have minded if she heard every thought he had, knew every urge he experienced. Her safety came before everything else.

He eased into the only empty seat at the table, the horsemen encasing him from every angle. He studied their faces more intently, noting the flawlessness of their skin, the purity of their eyes, the utter amusement in their expressions.

Amusement? Why?

Amun knew the moment Haidee did as he'd ordered and increased the distance between them, because Secrets sighed in relief and homed in on the three males and the female, at last digging past the buzzing, shrieking, moaning and silence.

—so damn bored…

—most fun I've had in a while…

—too bad we have to kill him…

—girl might be useful, though…

The other demons cackled, a thousand wind chimes in a storm. They weren't so loud that they overpowered Amun's other thoughts, and they weren't so stalwart they
overwhelmed him with dark urges. Oh, he could feel the things they wanted him to do. Taste the Horsemen's blood, cause their screams. They'd been locked away so long, they were desperate. They also sensed Haidee was nearby, the frost of her skin like an invisible tether, and so they behaved. He could deal.

“You want safe passage from this realm,” Red said, a statement of fact, not a question.

“As with everything here, you must buy that passage,” White added, her voice as lilting and delicate as a snowfall.

Black smiled at him, all teeth and menace. “I hope you're ready for this.”

Green, he noticed, never spoke a word. Just watched them all through enigmatic eyes. Amun felt a momentary sense of kinship.

He nodded at each of them.

“We'll play two hands,” Red said. “No more, no less. If you lose, you will give me a hand. And I don't mean a round of applause. Feel me?”

Behind him, Haidee choked on a breath.

I'll be fine, sweetheart,
he told her, even as he arched a brow at his opponents.
Ask them what happens if
they
lose to me.

She obeyed, her voice strained. He was proud of her. She was scared but unbending, used to being in control, but allowing him to lead.

Red shrugged one of his massive shoulders, his attention never veering from Amun. “If I lose, I'll escort you out of this realm myself.”

Secrets released an uneasy sigh. Over the centuries, Amun had learned the subtle nuances of his demon and knew Secrets sensed something amiss but hadn't yet figured out what.

So now came the real negotiation.
Ask them what
happens to you during—and after—all of this,
he told Haidee.
What happens to you if I win, and what happens to you if I lose.

Once again she obeyed, and all four of the Horsemen grinned.

“Why does the woman speak for you?” White asked in that snowflake voice, ignoring the question. She was frowning, clearly unable to think up a logical reason on her own.

“Tell us what we want to know,” Haidee insisted, ignoring the question.

Good girl.

Black lost his battle to hide his amusement and gave them another toothy grin. “We keep you no matter the outcome, of course.”

Amun leapt to his feet and slammed his dagger into the middle of the deck, causing the table to rattle.

“Do you need me to interpret that?” Haidee asked with false sweetness.

Rather than angering them, Amun's outburst and Haidee's insult increased their enjoyment. Chuckling, Red waved him back in his seat. “Fine, fine. The girl will share your fate. If you lose a hand, she loses a hand. If you win, she wins and leaves with you. Happy now?” Hardly.
Tell them if I lose the first game, they may take both my hands but neither of yours.

Of course, Haidee did not obey.

Mine will grow back, woman.
Eventually.
Tell them.

Still she remained silent.

He couldn't turn back and glare at her; they would suspect he communicated with her telepathically. Not knowing what else to do, he signed the words, hoping one of the Horsemen knew the language. To his astonishment, all of them did, for they all nodded with satisfaction.

“Very well,” Red said, “we will take both of yours and
neither of hers. But then there won't be a reason to play a second game. We'll have what we wanted. Both of your hands.”

Why did they want them?
Just pick a different prize for the second. Like…my feet.

Haidee growled low in her throat, a predator ready to pounce. He knew she could hear his thoughts as he signed, but there was nothing he could do to comfort her. “I don't agree to those terms.”

Everyone ignored her.

“Yes.” Red nodded. “Your feet will be a nice addition to our collection. We accept. Two rounds will be played, after all.”

“Amun—” Haidee began.

Amun held up his hand for silence, and he could feel the malevolence pulsing off her. Later, she would make him pay. But she would have the necessary appendages to do so, so he wasn't too concerned. To the Horsemen, he signed,
What are the rules?

They looked at each other, genuinely perplexed by his question.

“Rules?” White asked, blinking.

O-kay. Clearly the Rainbow Brigade lived by a code of its own making.

Secrets confirmed the suspicion. Suddenly Amun knew that there was no black and white with them, only shades of gray, and they wouldn't hesitate to lie, cheat or trick to get what they wanted.

Trusting them in any way would guarantee his loss.
Use the backpack to produce a new deck of cards,
he told Haidee.

A few seconds later, she was strolling to his side. Secrets whimpered, the other demons cried out in pain, and then utter silence claimed his head. She angrily slapped the deck into his hand and stomped back to her post without
a word. When they were once again distanced from each other, all of the demons peeked from their hiding places.

Secrets was a bit more subdued, afraid she would return at any moment.

The fear would have to be addressed, he realized. Secrets was a part of him. Amun relied on the beast and needed him at his best in dangerous situations. And as each new realm offered more danger than the last, that would have to be addressed
soon
.

Red leaned forward to study the new stack, and their fingers brushed.

In that split second, Secrets soaked up as much information as possible. William had created these creatures. Whether through conventional means or not, the demon couldn't tell. All he knew was that they had purged some of the darkness inside of William and they both hated and adored the man for it, at once wanting to destroy and worship him.

They were too destructive to be loosed on earth, and so they had been bound to this underworld, but those bonds had begun to wither the day William had left them, and were now worn thin. Every kindness they dealt freed them a little more. But kindness was not part of their makeup and they had to actively ponder how to be nice.

One day, they would be free of this place. One day, they would return to their creator. Until then, they waited impatiently, biding their time, amusing themselves as best they could. And they planned to use Amun as fodder for their amusement for a long, long time.

They had no plans to cheat. That was their kindness to Amun—and they'd been considering how to go about this for centuries. Centuries. Here, there was no past or future. Only present, a present that somehow bled into that nonexistent past and future. They had known he would come. Just as they knew he would lose.

“Everything is acceptable, I take it,” Red said. “Deal.”

He had Secrets; he
could
win. He hoped. He nodded.

Black's lips twitched at the corners, as if he fought another grin. “He wasn't asking if you agreed, demon. He was telling you to deal the cards. You know Texas Hold 'Em, I'm sure.”

Amun gave another nod. Tense, he shuffled the deck and tossed the cards. He'd played before. Anyone who was friends with Strider had played. Defeat fed on victories, and between battles with Hunters, he often challenged the men around him.

Amun couldn't afford to lose, and even though his opponents were playing honorably, that didn't mean he had to.

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