The Cowboy Lawman (9 page)

“Mia, I want to know if you remember anything. And if you need anything, we’re here.”

She nodded and stood. “I’ve got an appointment.”

“With Dr. Kim? I know this hasn’t been easy. We’re all hoping you can get back to us.”

“Thank you.”

She walked out, his parting words were for her to be safe and to let him know if she thought of anything.

But who could she trust? If someone on the inside was involved, how did she know who to talk to if she thought of anything?

Slade. She saw him at the end of the hall and she knew that she could always trust Slade. She checked the time and headed his way. “It will be another hour. You really can leave.”

“Mia, I’ll be here.”

“Good.” She smiled, wishing for an easy gesture. “I guess I’ll see you when I’m done.”

She walked away, knowing that she needed this counseling session. She wanted to be herself again, the old Mia who conquered. She wanted to be the friend Slade called from time to time just to say “hi” and see how she was doing.

She would get back to being the person she’d been. The person who’d had faith. Faith. She stopped at the door to the counselor’s office. She could hear her mom telling her to have faith and that God would do something with this situation.

She had never been good at waiting. Maybe He was using this to teach her how to wait for Him? Because if she waited, she remembered the verse, He would renew her strength.

Chapter Nine

S
lade glanced at the woman sitting in his truck as they drove toward Dawson. She’d been quiet since the counseling session. During lunch she’d picked at her food and he hadn’t questioned her.

“Stop looking at me.” She had her eyes closed and her head back.

“I’m not.”

“You are. Quick glances. See, you did it again.”

He laughed. It felt good to laugh. It eased a lot of the tension that had been building between them. She opened her eyes and smiled at him. He looked away, back to the road.
Focus on the road.
He’d forgotten how beautiful she looked when she smiled that way.

“Okay, I looked at you. I’ve been wondering how you feel,” he admitted.

“I’m tired but maybe I’m getting to the other side of this.”

“Of course you are.”

“Tina met with Butch while we were working undercover. They think he got followed. Why did he take that chance, Slade?” She turned slightly in her seat to face him. She drew up her legs, pulling the skirt around them and tucking it.

He cleared his throat and concentrated on the long drive to Dawson.

“Because he missed her. They spent a lot of time apart. She was probably just finding out she was pregnant when the two of you left. And she had to deal with the fact that he spent more time playing your husband than actually being hers.”

“I know.” Mia looked straight ahead. “I sometimes think that’s why she isn’t willing to talk to me.”

“She’s working through a lot. Probably some of her own guilt.” He eased into the passing lane to get around an old farm truck hauling too many round bales. “How did the counseling session go?”

“Same old, same old. She asked me to think about who I am without this job. She wants me to visualize my life without it, because that’s a good possibility. And she asked me if I might be dealing with depression.”

“And?”

“I’m not depressed. I can’t sleep. End of story.”

“Depression isn’t incurable, Mia. It isn’t a sign of weakness.”

“You think I’m depressed?”

“I’m saying you’ve been through a lot and sometimes when we suffer trauma like you’ve suffered, it happens.”

“I see. You sound like a man who knows.”

“I’m a man who needed help after my wife died. I fought it. I didn’t want to feel weak. I didn’t want to feel as if I wasn’t trusting God.”

“I see.”

“I had to face the fact that I needed help. I had to get my life back. I did it so I wouldn’t let Caleb down.”

“Slade?” Her voice sounded sleepy.

“Yeah?”

“Thank you. For sharing that.”

“We’re friends.” He kept on driving while she fell asleep.

She hadn’t slept in a while, not really. He thought about taking her home, but that would mean waking her up. And then when would she sleep again? He checked the gas gauge. He had filled it up before they left Tulsa so he had a few hundred miles to burn before it got close to empty.

That meant several hours of driving time. He picked up his phone and dialed his sister.

“Hey, is everything okay?” Eve asked. She was the sibling he always counted on. His two younger brothers were usually off chasing the next bull-riding event or a female who didn’t want to get caught.

“Yeah, good. Listen, is Caleb doing okay?”

“He’s having a blast. We made cookies. Now we’re going to town.”

“Can you hang on to him a while longer?”

She hesitated. “Sure, why?”

“I’m driving, Mia is sleeping. She needs to sleep.”

Another long hesitation. “So you’re going to drive?”

“If that’s what it takes.”

“Slade, is there something...”

He cut her off. “This is what you do for a friend.”

“Right. Okay. Call me later.”

He told her goodbye and he kept driving. After a couple of hours of the radio and Mia’s soft breathing, he took the back road and headed into Dawson. Mia slept on. Once he thought she might be about to wake up. She cried out in her sleep, moving next to him. He touched her hand, covering it with his, holding on until she quieted.

Eventually, he parked in the back lot behind the Convenience Counts convenience store on the edge of Dawson. Tricia, owner and manager, stepped out. When she saw that it was him, she waved and fortunately left well enough alone. Explaining to Tricia was the last thing he wanted to do, especially since he couldn’t explain to himself what he was doing.

Helping a friend sounded easy, uncomplicated. He’d enjoyed his life being uncomplicated, just him and Caleb, and an occasional date that went nowhere. When he looked at Mia, he saw a complication. The list of reasons was long.

How did he get involved with the best friend of the wife he had loved and lost? How did he get involved with someone who had a career that might take her back undercover and away from them for months at a time, especially when Caleb had gotten so attached to her?

He sat there watching her sleep. The other thing he couldn’t stop thinking about were his recent prayers asking God to help him move on.

The sun had set behind the building, leaving the back parking lot in shadows. Slade moved in the seat and put an arm around Mia. She moaned in her sleep but she relaxed and leaned against his shoulder. He kissed the top of her head and leaned back, holding her easily against him. She breathed in deeply, then exhaled and sighed.

* * *

Mia awoke with a start. It was nearly dark. She didn’t know where she was. An arm held her loosely, circling her shoulder, keeping her close. She blinked a few times and turned to look into gray eyes that watched her intently. She raised her hand and rested it on his heart. The beat was steady, sure.

“What time is it?” She looked around, at the twilight sky. “Shouldn’t we have been home a long time ago?”

“I let you sleep.”

She moved and he sat up. “Let me sleep?”

“I drove—” he looked at his watch “—for a few hours. You needed sleep, Mia.”

“How long have we been sitting here?”

He laughed a little, and she had the good sense to feel nervous. “Long enough for everyone in Dawson to spread the story.”

“That’s bad.” She leaned into him again, resting her head on his shoulder. “We should go.”

But she didn’t want to. Leaning against Slade had to be the most comfortable place she’d ever been, the most restful. Slade felt like home. And home always felt safe, like a sanctuary from the real world.

“Your grandmother parked behind us for a few minutes. She looked like she might get out and do a happy dance. I guess I should have kept driving, but I didn’t want to run out of gas.”

Mia rubbed her hands over her face and blinked sleep from her eyes. “Gran catching us could be bad. But I feel better than I have in weeks.”

“Are you hungry?”

“Starving.”

“Vera’s closed. Do you want a slice of pizza or a corn dog from the convenience store?”

“Why not?”

She watched him go inside and then she pulled the keys from the ignition and stepped out of the truck. It was a beautiful night. The air was crisp and smelled like the country, like cattle and grain from the mill and fried food inside the store. Millions of stars twinkled in the velvety sky. Somewhere a radio played, but she couldn’t make out the song. She let the tailgate down on the truck and took a seat.

A few minutes later Slade sat down next to her. He put two bottles of water between them and handed her a corn dog and a packet of mustard. She took it. She’d never been a fan of corn dogs but at that moment, sitting on the tailgate of her truck, rested for the first time in weeks, it was the best meal she’d had. Maybe ever.

“Are you going to the rodeo Friday?” Slade asked after he finished scarfing down his corn dog. Mia looked at him, finding the question funny for some reason. Maybe because she’d slept and she felt good. Maybe because it took her back to the old days.

“I plan on it.”

“Caleb wants to ride his pony in the kids’ pole-bending event. I don’t know if he’s ready.”

“Of course he is. Even if he doesn’t win, he’s ready.”

Slade looked down at her, an easy smile on his face. “I really am glad you’re back.”

“Me, too. And I’m glad you’re still my friend.”

“Haven’t I always been?”

“Yes, you have.” She leaned, touching her shoulder to his. “I haven’t been the best friend I could have been.”

“You’ve always been here for me. Maybe not in Dawson, but if I needed you, I knew where to find you.”

“Slade?”

“Mia?”

“I’m scared.”

“I know.”

She moved out of the circle of his arms and looked up at the sky. “We should go.”

“Probably a good idea.” He hopped down and reached for her hand, helping her down from the tailgate as if she was someone else, someone who needed chivalry and moonlight.

She took his hand and he led her to the cab of the truck, opening the door for her and helping her buckle the seat belt. She leaned back, letting him offer his help, grateful for it.

It had taken this accident to teach her to let people help her. She told him that, and he smiled and closed the truck door. It had taken this accident to bring her home. She watched Slade in the side mirror. She watched him put up the truck’s tailgate. She watched him take a minute to look up at the stars. When he came to get back in the truck, she pretended she hadn’t been watching him.

“How about I take you to your house and I’ll have Eve bring your truck in tomorrow?”

“That’s too much trouble.”

“No, it isn’t.” He turned down the road to her house. “Mia, I don’t want you to drive home alone. I don’t want you to go in your house alone.”

“That’s sweet, Slade, but I’m really okay. I do know how to take care of myself.”

He parked her truck in front of her house, obviously not letting her make the decision this time.

“And I know that no matter how prepared we are, things happen.”

“You’re going in with me, aren’t you?”

“I plan on it.”

She reached to push her door open. “Suit yourself, cowboy.”

He followed her up the sidewalk to the front door and she handed him the key.

Slade opened the door and flipped on a light switch. Mia thought about yelling, “Boo” but then thought better of it. He probably wouldn’t appreciate her humor at the moment.

“Are you going to check out the whole house?”

“I planned on it.” He walked through the house, flipping on lights, checking closets.

Mia waited in the kitchen. She needed to look in on the mare. When he came back from his security check, she handed him a glass of tea.

“I have to make sure the mare has water.”

“I’ll walk with you.” He set the tea on the counter and she stopped him, placing her hand on his arm.

“Slade, I’ve got this. I’m going to walk out there and check on my mare. You’re going to drink your tea.” She patted his arm. “And then you’re going to go home and take care of Caleb.”

He opened his mouth to object. She shook her head, stopping him.

“You’ve been a great friend today. And I needed a friend. I definitely didn’t need family. I love them, but they want to do everything for me. They want to fix me. You made this day easier.”

“Thank you. Or should I say, you’re welcome?”

“Both.” The smile came easier now. Maybe life wasn’t back to normal, but she felt a little more like herself. She kissed him on the cheek. “If I’m not back in five minutes, send out the posse.”

“Got it.”

The mare was waiting for her. The pretty bay stuck her head over the fence and Mia ran her hand down the horse’s sleek neck. The animal already looked better. Maybe she just looked happier, because she had a home again.

Mia lifted the handle of the water spigot and the hose gurgled and then spurted as water poured into the trough. The horse took a long drink and then looked around, water dripping from her mouth. Mia turned, too, the hair on the back of her neck standing.

With the light on the back porch, she couldn’t see into the dark. Chills ran down her arms and she tried to reach for a weapon that wasn’t there.

With easy movements she pushed down the handle on the spigot and petted the horse one last time. She started toward the house, waving at Slade. He waved back. She was fine. It had been a case of nerves, nothing else.

Slade opened the door. “How’s the horse?”

“Good.” She walked past him to the sink and washed her hands.

“Mia?” He looked at her and glanced out the door. Without asking he clicked the lock in place and then the dead bolt. “What happened?”

“Nothing.”

“Nothing? I’m not buying that.”

“Seriously, nothing happened. I just got spooked.” She hooked an arm through his and walked him out of the kitchen. “I’m good. You can go.”

“I’m supposed to leave and you’re going to do what?”

“I’ve been taking care of myself for a long time.”

“You drive me crazy, you know that?”

“Yes, I probably do.” She stopped at the door with him. “I got spooked, Slade. There’s a lot going on and one thing I do have is an overactive imagination. So go home and try to relax.”

“Let me take you out to the ranch.”

“I’m not going to the ranch because I’ve got a case of the heebie-jeebies.”

“Fine, I’m staying.”

“That would start more than a few rumors and result in a shotgun wedding with my grandmother holding the shotgun.”

He drew in a deep breath. “All right, I’m going. But I’m calling county and telling them to drive by here tonight.”

“You do that.” She walked out the front door with him. “You can pray for me, too.”

“I’m glad you’ll let me do that.” He brushed a hand across her cheek.

For a second she thought he would kiss her. But he didn’t. And for much longer than a second, she was disappointed, filled with regret, then guilt.